Courage Is A Woman

"You and I met in this city we love, I got in a car with a stranger

You and I get a kick from the ride, we like to live in danger

But who's to say that you know me if you know my name?

I don't need to tell you my story"

Rada – Anonymous In New York

Chapter 3. Strangers In New York

He was handsome, and the night was young. The curtains were partially open, and outside the city was slowly turning its head away. Stella felt safe and in control, exactly how she liked it. She walked back with Nick towards her bed and turned them around to sit him down. 'I smell like work,' he said. 'That's okay,' she answered softly and kissed him. His hands came up to her legs and she let him, but stopped him when he tried to untie her robe. His shirt came off and she stepped back for a moment to give him the space to remove his jeans. He sat back down, didn't try to turn her around or control her, and she felt proud of her ability to judge people. It had been tested recently, but apparently she still had it.

Stella straddled him, allowing him to touch her breasts through the robe and bra and sighed at the feeling. He was a good kisser, but when he wanted to travel his lips down to her neck she stopped him once again, recapturing his lips before he could protest. They moved further onto her bed and Nick stayed in a sitting position while Stella settled in his lap. Their fucking was slow at first, both of them caught in the feeling of the other person. They were a good match, he thought, and he wondered what she looked like naked. The robe had slipped off one shoulder and he saw freckles dusted across her delicate skin. Somehow he understood her, he knew this was about her more than it was about him and he liked it. She leaned back a little to look into his eyes and he was quickly lost in the turbulence he saw there. His hands came to her face and she softly redirected them, letting them settle on her hips. As her movements became more frantic he matched her speed, moving his hands up her back to ask her to lie down with him. She let him softly pull her down to him because of the undemanding nature of his request and he took a little bit more control of their rhythm, and somehow she found it sweet. He was clearly there for her needs.

Soon, waves of pleasure were coursing through Stella. Sometimes, orgasm wasn't even her end goal – not everyone had the ability to give that to her and sometimes it didn't matter. It was about the physical connection first, the touch of another person, the looking into each other's eyes, the control she could have. How much she could take and how much she could give. But Nick was good, he was handsome and strong – and he obviously understood her motives. As she felt him move impossibly deep she couldn't control her reaction, a moan came from deep within her and she buried her face in his chest. His hands held her close, one on her lower back and the other in her hair and she was slightly uncomfortable but really too far gone to care as the world around her seemed to stop and she came.
As the tremors subsided she lifted her head and sat up, looking into his eyes. He seemed to be asking permission and she nodded, barely noticeable but he understood. She moved on him, determined to control his pleasure, to make sure he didn't take it but she gave it to him. One more grind, one more circle of her body and he dug his fingers into her hips, moving slightly uncontrollably. The movement caused another small wave of pleasure to wash over her, it had always been one of the most erotic things about a man – the moment they let themselves go at the mercy of her power.

Much later Nick invited her into the shower, and she declined gracefully, smiling at his considerateness. As he re-emerged she was sitting on the side of the bed, looking at him. 'How long are you staying for?' he asked in his New York accent. 'Five more days,' she answered. They didn't specify whether they'd meet again. He didn't ask, she didn't tell. He suspected he would not see much of her again, but he might be mistaken. Nodding, he looked at her one last time. 'If you need anything, I'll be in the bar most of the time.' It was partially a lie because he'd only be there from the afternoon into the night, but he figured she knew. Stella nodded and granted him a smile in return. 'Thank you.' Nick left and she remained there for a little while, sitting on the edge of her bed, staring at the door.

A few doors down Dana Scully was asleep, her curtains also opened a little as a reminder of where she was. Her night would mostly be spent asleep, as opposed to Stella's, who was still suffering from jetlag and nightmares to keep her from resting properly once she made her way into bed.

The next morning came quickly for Dana, and as the city started to wake up and the light slowly crept into her room she opened her eyes. Sighing she buried her face in her pillow for a few minutes – the first few minutes were always the hardest. As she looked at her phone she saw a text message from the conference organization to thank her for yesterday and one from Mulder asking her opinion on an autopsy report. She ignored the first one and told Mulder she'd get back to him, in the end, she was on a kind of holiday. Within the hour she was outside, a fresh cup of coffee provided by the hotel in one hand and her phone in the other. The air was cool but there was a promise of a sunny day hanging around the city and she decided to try and spend most of it outside. Getting breakfast was easy, there were hundreds of places to choose from and soon she'd found a cute place with a bar table looking out into the street where she could sit. She ordered a very indulgent breakfast that included pancakes, yoghurt with fruits and another coffee and sighed in contentment as she put it all out in front of her: What a way to start the day.

Stella woke three times during that night. The first time she wasn't sure if she had dreamt – there were images in her mind but they might just be her imagination. The second time she had a headache and needed the bathroom, where she was reminded of her evening in a pleasant way: The bathroom smelled faintly of man and Nick had left it in a kind of disarray.

The third time she woke she was sweaty and shaking: he had returned. Just as her brain had started to replay the events of last night in her mind, just as she had subconsciously decided to give in to that feeling she had felt it happen. Her mind had reached deep within and somehow the image of Nick had turned into Paul. Overpowering her, pinning her down – violating her even in death. She grabbed her dream diary from the nightstand and tried to make sense of her feelings. Writing down what had happened seemed too personal but she tried anyway, thinking that it was what she would have done before. Jotting down what she remembered she also decided to stop trying to get some decent sleep, apparently it wasn't going to happen. She felt slightly more rested than yesterday but the headache hadn't gone, and she vowed to herself not to drink any alcohol today – her body could use a day off.

It was around the same time as she had woken up yesterday, her phone reading 05:51AM. Remembering the room service policy she decided on a swim, maybe the pool would be open and it would be quiet so she could gather her thoughts. Putting on her swimsuit she covered it with Adidas tracksuit bottoms and a zip up hoodie. She collected her things – swimming cap, goggles, slippers and a towel and headed downstairs.

The swimming pool door indicated no opening or closing hours and she could see it had been in use by the rippling water so she decided to just dive in and enjoy her alone time there. Swimming was her outlet, it was freeing and demanding at the same time. She could exhaust herself or relax completely, train every part of her body or train her mind, and she was completely submerged within herself. If she needed to, she could cry and no one would notice. If the outside world threatened to get too hard she could use the water to escape.

The hotel pool was a decent size, nowhere near her regular competition-sized pool back home but it would do nicely enough. She started swimming and soon she got into her rhythm, controlling every movement, every breath she took. Her mind wandered to the conference, and soon, to the doctor she had seen. Diana? She didn't quite remember her name but she knew she wanted to talk to her. She had after all said that they could contact her if they had any questions. And Stella had many, many questions.

She continued to swim for almost a full hour, slowing down a little in between before picking her speed back up. No one disturbed her in the pool, and she enjoyed having the space to herself, reminding herself to try and use this time slot for her entire stay in New York. At around 07:30 people started to join her, and she thought it was time to leave. Back in her hotel room she decided to, after having showered away the pool's chlorine scent, dress casually for the day. Dark, slim fitting pants and a T-shirt would be comfortable yet classy and she'd be okay walking around Central Park all day. Stella usually didn't wear flats, she was a high heels type of girl, but she was glad to have brought a pair of shiny black business-like shoes that would be feminine yet durable if she was going to walk a lot. Knowing the city she remembered distances were always longer than they would seem at first, and even though the walk would be worth it she wouldn't want to spend all day in pumps. Her hair was still slightly wet and she decided to let it air dry. It would turn out more straight than usual but she didn't mind, not wanting to waste time blow-drying and curling it.

Soon, she was outside and looking for a spot to eat something. Swimming had made her hungry and her headache had turned into a dull throbbing – no alcohol, she reminded herself. After walking for a few minutes she spotted a coffee house across the street. As Stella walked into the café she looked around to see if she could sit. On the left, by the window, she spotted someone she recognized - the woman from the conference. There was a bar table set up against the front and sun was starting to seep in, reflecting off of the woman's bright red hair. Dana, she remembered. Her name was Dana. Stella ordered a coffee and a sandwich and thanked the barista before taking a table on the wall. She could see Dana from her position, and she was intrigued by how the sunlight carefully illuminated her. She seemed oblivious to the world around her, and Stella tried not to watch her too intently – after all, she didn't even know her.

After looking at her from a distance for a few minutes while finishing her sandwich Stella decided to join her. She was eager to get to know Dana and there was really no reason not to say hi – they had seen each other before, although that might be unbeknownst to Dana. She grabbed her coffee and walked over to the bar area where people were slowly leaving for work. As she stepped into the light that came in through the window she got a look at the food Dana was indulging in and she smiled. 'Hi,' she said, cocking her head to the side. 'Can I ask you something?'

Scully heard someone approach before she heard the voice, but when she did she felt strangely captivated. A smooth, soft voice with an impeccable British accent was asking her a question and it was so unexpected that she had to gather herself for a second. 'Sure,' she answered. 'I'm not from around here though, so I'm not sure if I can help you.' She didn't know why she made an excuse but she felt like she needed to. 'That's okay,' the woman answered. 'I think I saw you at the crime conference yesterday, would that be correct?' Scully nodded as she realized she recognized the woman from there as well. 'Yes, actually. I was there yesterday lecturing.' The woman in front of her was the same woman she had seen in the hotel bar the night before. She had been thinking of her earlier, and last night as well, thinking of the ways in which they differed. However sitting next to her now Scully could only notice the similarities. 'I'm Stella Gibson, Detective Superintendent with the Metropolitan Police,' the woman introduced herself. 'I'm here from London.' Scully smiled. 'Dana Scully, I'm a medical doctor.' She didn't name the FBI part, thinking that Stella would know if she attended her lecture and there was really no need to name it in a busy New York café. 'Mind if I join you?' Stella asked and Scully indicated the seat next to her. 'Please do. So what brings you all the way here?' she dared to ask. Stella looked at her coffee for a moment. 'A case, or rather… The aftermath of one. It's a long story. I found your lecture yesterday very insightful,' she slightly changed the subject but Scully was clever too. 'Did it relate to your case? I hope it was helpful in some way.' Stella nodded. 'Yes, and yes. Which is why I wanted to talk to you. I was wondering if I could run some notes by you.' It was only partially a lie – she could use any insights Dana might have to ease her mind and to help influence the still ongoing cases against her, but there was something more going on. Stella felt a tingle in her belly whenever Dana's eyes met hers. She was open and bright and it didn't seem like an act like it sometimes was for Stella, and that reeled her in like a fish on a line. She was defenseless against Dana Scully's blue eyes, her red shining hair and her obvious intelligence. It unsettled her a little but it also intensified the feeling, and since she was on holiday she allowed herself the chance to explore this. As long as she could control it she would be fine.

Dana looked at the other woman's face. She was maybe a few years younger than Dana, but not by much looking at what she had achieved. Her blond hair was slightly damp, probably from showering, and she looked clean and classy. Scully thought she looked like the ultimate power woman: self-assured, calm, peaceful and in control, all things she struggled with on a daily basis. She hadn't come here with the intention of making friends but she had a feeling that Stella Gibson would be her type of person. 'What kind of notes do you need me to take a look at?' she asked. 'Nothing procedural,' Stella said quickly. 'I just have some case notes on a man that malingered amnesia in favor of his court case. It was a difficult case that didn't end well, but I'd like to learn as much as I can from the experience given the fact that it will stay with me for a long time and possibly put an end to my career.' Scully nodded. 'Okay,' she agreed. 'Do you want to meet later to go over them?' Stella agreed. 'Yes, but let's not waste a perfectly good day by staying inside. Do you mind working outside somewhere?' Scully shook her head softly. 'No, not at all. I was going to go into the city today anyway.' Scully would never forget how the first time she was in New York she was astounded by the amount of parks and green corners she found. Stella smiled. 'Good. Let's meet back here at let's say... 1400? We can head to Central Park for the afternoon.' Scully nodded. 'Okay. I do think we're in the same hotel actually, we could just meet in the lobby.' Stella regarded her quietly and Scully felt as if she was looking straight into her soul. 'Sounds good,' Stella agreed. 'I'll leave you to it,' she said with a hint of a smile around her lips, pointing towards the partially devoured pancakes. 'I'll see you around.' Scully nodded. 'Bye.'

Both women spent their mornings rediscovering the city and with it maybe parts of themselves, and both women were on each other's minds.

Scully thought about the blonde who apparently was in a bad spot after a particularly hard case. She would never have guessed it from the way she looked – put together and on top of things, but then again, that might be the point. She hadn't seen any indication of a wedding band, or any other jewelry. Going from what little she'd seen in the bar last night she'd profile Stella as single, independent, but with a difficult childhood. From what little they had spoken she suspected Stella knew how to work through her emotions, but also care deeply if things got personal. She recognized herself in those characteristics, and she smiled at the thought – somehow, this detective, this stranger that she'd only just met was known to her.

Stella decided to go shopping and she found herself trying on dresses in no time. As she stood in front of a full-length mirror she let her eyes roam her reflection. She had picked a navy blue midi length dress, the neckline deep and flattering but still very high-end and leaving enough to the imagination. She liked what she saw and sighed contently. Her mind wandered to Dana Scully, would she be interested in women? Maybe not, at first. She'd been there before, and it hadn't been an issue then, Stella thought. Going with the flow sometimes meant breaking your own rules. Was it smart? Probably not, and it sure as hell wasn't appropriate but Stella really and truly couldn't care less at the moment. She found she was really looking forward to spending more time with Dana, liking her mysterious energy. She bought the dress and decided to walk back to the hotel to make sure she met Dana on time.

After Scully finished her pancakes she made her way to Bryant Park. It was one of the places that had stayed with her from other visits. The park was located behind the New York Public Library, making it something of a hidden treasure. It was surrounded by skyscrapers and there were busy streets on three sides of the park, the fourth being guarded by the impressive library building. There was always such a wide range of people there, street artists, musicians, the working class on break, students. Actors studying their lines, writers, locals, tourists… To Scully this one tiny park represented the entire city, and it was a strange but beautiful thing to be in the middle of. She had brought her tablet so she could do some work, but while she was looking over Mulder's autopsy files she felt her attention wander to the people around her. Sighing, she put her tablet away again and reminded herself of the fact that she wasn't in any way obliged to work today, especially not for Mulder. Almost immediately she caught herself and she chuckled at the realization: She would be working this afternoon as well. And she was actually looking forward to it.

Stella Gibson had taken her time to change before heading downstairs to meet Dana that afternoon. As she walked through the lobby she spotted her partner from the previous night in the bar, getting ready for his shift, and as he made eye contact she smiled at him. He nodded at her as a sign of recognition and went on with his work – yes, an appropriate choice, she commended herself again. As she looked down at her dark maroon high heels she heard the lift ping again.

Dana exited the elevator and immediately saw Stella waiting for her a little further into the hotel lobby. She was wearing dark blue pants, a grey fitted T-shirt and red heels, and Scully felt a little bit intimidated; Stella seemed to be all business and it was a little bit unsettling. Dana hadn't really considered her outfit and was still wearing her dark jeans, although she had changed into a different top because of the nice weather. Her Nikes seemed awfully casual compared to Stella. Also, the heels had added a few inches to her height and she was now definitely taller than Scully.

'Hi,' Dana said smiling, unsure if they should shake hands or not. 'Hi,' Stella answered. 'Did you have a nice morning?' Scully nodded. 'I did, actually. How about you?' Stella started walking and Dana followed. 'Yes, thank you,' she answered. Any awkwardness Scully had felt quickly faded as they found they talked easily. Together they exited the hotel and headed for the subway. They decided to head to Central Park, get some lunch on the way before exiting the subway at East 96 street and finding a random spot in the park to sit. Neither of them knew their way around Central Park well but both of them had been there before and they felt confident they would find their way. Soon they found a spot on the reservoir, giving them a view neither would quickly forget. Deciding on a bench on the running track Stella smiled at Dana who was admiring the New York skyline visible from their position. 'It's quite the view, isn't it.' Dana nodded. 'It is, I don't think I've let myself see it before.' It sounded strange but it was true and Stella understood. 'Have you been here before?' she asked. Scully nodded. 'I'm pretty sure I ran this exact track one morning. But somehow I didn't even see this.' Stella smiled sadly. 'Well, we're here now.' Dana met her eyes and sighed. 'Any advice?' Stella frowned a little. 'What do you mean?' Dana looked down at her folded hands. 'You seem to have it all under control. I'm… I could use some of that right now.' Stella shook her head. 'I think women often feel pushed to have everything under control. Be beautiful, be confident, have a husband, have a child. Be happy. The reality is, no one has their shit together. We're all just pretending. The image we put out to the world sometimes isn't in any way who we are.' 'Huh,' Scully pondered. 'I recently realized I've been living for someone else for a long time, so even though I'm not sure how I feel about that yet I agree with you.' 'Are you married?' Stella dared to ask, even though there was no wedding ring on Dana's hand. 'No,' Scully said softly and it moved Stella a little to hear the vulnerability in Dana's voice. For a few seconds she waited for her to ask the same question, but Dana never did – she seemed caught up in her past, looking out over the lake. Changing the subject Stella grabbed some of the files she'd brought from her bag. 'Here, this is what I'd like your help on,' she started, opening the folder and putting it on Dana's legs. Dana met her eyes shortly and smiled, thankful for the interruption. 'The Belfast Strangler,' she said softly and started to read.

Two hours later they had moved to the grass lawn after Dana's legs had gone numb from sitting on the bench. Stella had been grateful, not wanting to admit that her heels weren't the most comfortable ever, but the lawn had given her a chance to kick them off for the excuse of being unable to walk gracefully. They had settled in the shade, partially against a tree because Dana had been afraid of getting sunburnt – something Stella could easily imagine being a problem for the fair skinned redhead. She would have had the same problem but the SPF in her moisturizer would take care of the worst of it. Both women had their notebooks out, having had some interesting revelations during their discussion. Stella was impressed by Dana's knowledge and ability to analyze while Scully thought she had never met someone with more human insight than Stella Gibson. She seemed to be able to read people very well, and Dana was sure Stella had concluded a thing or two about her during the past few hours – but she didn't mind. In fact, she was really enjoying the way they were able to discuss with and listen to each other, something she realized she missed with Mulder. He would often not even hear her out, seemingly not even listen to her unless she explicitly told him to shut up. Stella was different. She was interested in every word, every theory Dana had and even if she didn't agree she'd be open to the suggestion. Dana found the case interesting as well, although she could see that Stella was only showing her the theory – It must have been devastating, but she wasn't giving much emotion away. Dana regarded her quietly sometimes, hearing words coming out of Stella's mouth that seemed almost detached from what her eyes were showing. Those icy grey-blue wells were unable to hide the truth, and Dana had been trained to look for the truth all her life.

At one point Stella met her eyes while talking about how the suspect had played a game with her during their interviews and Dana was instantly slightly taken aback by what she saw. Stella averted her eyes and continued to speak but Dana stopped her, putting her hand on Stella's forearm. 'Hey,' she said softly. 'Are you okay?' Stella hadn't really given her a reason to ask other than what she'd seen in a flash across the other woman's eyes. A darkness, a memory. One that Stella seemed to want to forget. Stella stopped talking and gathered herself for a second before meeting Dana's eyes again. This time, the darkness was gone. It had been replaced with something else, something Scully couldn't exactly place. A coping mechanism, her mind told her. 'Yes,' Stella answered her, almost coldly. Scully recognized it as emotional detachment, something she was particularly bad at recently. She'd often tried it just before she broke, and suddenly she was afraid she had pushed Stella to that same point. 'I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, I'm sorry,' she apologized. 'No need,' Stella said. 'It's nothing.' Dana decided to let it go for now and she removed her hand from Stella's arm.

Shortly after that they decided to call it a day and enjoy the park a bit before heading back. Unbeknownst to Stella, Scully wondered if it would be okay to ask her to join her for dinner, she would enjoy the company and they could talk a bit more. After packing up she decided to just ask, after all, there was no reason not to. 'Do you have dinner plans?' Scully asked as she was waiting for Stella to put on her heels. Stella looked up at Dana, balancing on one shoe while slipping into the other. 'I don't,' she replied. 'But I know a few places, if you'd like to join me.' Scully smiled, she should have known Stella would turn it around in a heartbeat – suddenly she was the one getting asked to dinner. 'I'd love to,' she conceded. They started to walk side by side, trying not to get in the way of the joggers along the water. It was still early, around 4PM and the sky was blue and warm. Scully wondered about what she'd seen in Stella's eyes, thinking that in reality they were strangers after all, having only just met that day. She really had no right to pry, Stella didn't owe her an explanation. Next to her, Stella was quiet – a battle was waging inside of her. She knew that her only hope of dealing with her experiences was to talk about them, to confide in someone, but she felt so vulnerable that it scared her. However, Dana lived across the world from her and she would probably never see her again after this conference – it might be the perfect opportunity.

Quietly and peacefully they walked through the park, staying off the main roads and enjoying the weather. It wasn't as crowded as Scully would have thought and it made her feel free. Then she remembered the question Stella had asked her earlier – if she was married. Stella wasn't the only one not telling the whole story, she thought. 'Can I ask you something?' she said softly to the woman walking next to her in impossibly high heels. 'Go ahead,' Stella answered, putting her hands in her pockets. 'Are you?' 'Am I what?' Stella didn't understand at first. 'Married?' Scully clarified. 'I think by now you've seen that I don't wear a ring, agent Scully.' Dana nodded. 'I have. But that doesn't mean anything.' She remembered how she herself had decided this would be a getaway from all the shit in her life, and it wasn't so hard to imagine someone like Stella doing the same thing. However, Scully was pretty sure she wasn't married and for a split second she wondered why she'd asked in the first place, if she already knew. And what did it matter? 'I've never been with someone long enough to get to that point,' Stella admitted. It was just a statement, no particular tone or mood detectable and Scully pondered her answer for a second. 'I have and it still didn't happen,' she said. Stella looked over at Scully as they walked along the Great Lawn. 'Would you have liked it to happen?' she asked. Scully shrugged. 'We've never needed it, I think.' Stella made a mental note of the fact that Scully was in a relationship, and a committed one going by her answers. Scully saw a waffle stand and walked over. 'Do you want a coffee?' Stella nodded. 'Sure.' Scully ordered and paid and it gave them both a chance to think about their conversation.

'I had a dream about this place,' Stella confessed. They had been walking past the Turtle Pond and she'd spotted the castle. She had decided to try and open up a little bit, see how it went and take it from there. 'Oh,' Scully said. 'Do you have memories here?' Stella nodded, and Dana thought she looked sad. 'You don't need to tell me,' she added quickly. Stella looked at her, smiling weakly. 'It's a long story.' She didn't elaborate and Dana didn't ask, and it was a gentle reminder to Stella of how not everyone wanted or expected something from her. She liked the quiet energy Dana had, the way she listened and the careful apologies when she seemed to have hit a nerve. Stella liked her altruistic and compassionate nature but she also wanted to reassure her that she wouldn't break when the questions got difficult. 'Dana…' she said and mentioned for her to stop walking, softly grabbing her wrist to turn her around. Scully stopped and turned, facing Stella. Stella breathed in deeply, gathering her thoughts before meeting Dana's eyes. 'My father died when I was a girl. He took me here once. That's where the dreams come from.' Scully searched Stella's face, admiring her strength. However, there was more, and Dana felt like she could push a little. 'That's not all of it, is it,' she said softly. Scully watched how Stella's left eyebrow raised, not in a question but in tension. 'No,' Stella said, a slight tremble in her voice. 'I've been having nightmares ever since the case.' Scully knew enough about serial murderers to know they could haunt the dreams of even the strongest person in the world. She didn't ask Stella to clarify, because she knew that Stella's dreams involved the Belfast Strangler. The combination of a loss of father and this man violating her dreams made Scully feel deeply for Stella, who she saw was trying her hardest not to seem affected. To anyone walking past she would seem completely calm and in control, but Scully wasn't oblivious to the pain. She decided to follow her gut instinct, Stella looked like someone who was at moments as lost as she was – and maybe they could help each other. Scully stepped closer, well into Stella's personal space and softly embraced her. Stella returned the gesture, her arms coming around Scully's back. They stood like that for a few seconds, Stella closed her eyes and Dana breathed out slowly. It was a comforting hug, something neither had realized that they had needed until right this moment.

After a few seconds, Scully stepped away, grabbing onto Stella's hand a little while before releasing her. 'I understand,' she just said. Stella had unshed tears in her eyes but seemed in control of them, and as she swallowed them down she smiled at Dana. 'Thank you,' she responded. They both looked at their coffees, wondering how they had managed not to spill them, and in silent agreement they continued to walk past the Belvedere castle. 'So,' Dana said. 'Where did you want to go for dinner?'

And just like that, the tension was gone. Knowing, understanding and accepting each other's needs both women knew that they were safe with each other. They didn't need to tell each other their stories, not just yet. As they got deeper into the park they reached the Ramble, a series of smaller, secluded paths leading through the heart of the park. Stella smiled at Dana's enthusiasm, and when Dana reached back to grab Stella's hand to help her climb a series of steps she decided to let it linger a little while. Dana didn't seem to mind and Stella softly squeezed her palm. She saw Scully look down at her feet for a second before a smile spread across her face again. She didn't look at Stella, but quietly she decided that this was okay. She was allowed to have this. It wasn't something she was familiar with and she didn't even really know what it was, but she knew that she wanted to let it develop.

Stella slightly regretted her choice of shoes, but she would gladly suffer a little to see Dana so open and free. She could see the exact moment Dana decided to accept this, whatever it was, and Stella was intrigued by her reaction. The way she held on to Stella's hand, softly but surely, and the straightness in her shoulders told Stella that she'd be okay. Dana wasn't going to abandon or hurt her, that's not the kind of person she was. Whatever pain they both might be in, they had a few days away from it and Stella was determined to try and find herself again.