A/N: So glad people like it so far! I am not sure where I am going with this but we will see! R&R

We walked into a diner that had been a usual spot for us in the past and grabbed a booth in the back. Once we sat down then awkwardness, tension, and discomfort was obvious to anyone who was in the diner.

"Well these are two faces that I haven't seen in years!" The older woman said as she approached our table making us both smile.

"Hi Linda, it's nice to see you"

"Well hello detective handsome, still looking as good as ever" The older woman flirted making me giggle.

"And you" She said directing her attention to me. "You are still looking nice, but you know that if I was your age I would give you a run for your money with this one" She said nudging Elliot. She always flirted with Elliot, even though she was in her 70's the woman had spunk.

"I think you still could, Linda. He's all yours" I joked, but I saw Elliots face fall out of the corner of my eye.

"You're telling me you still haven't snagged this boy up" She asked with surprise then she lightly hit Elliot in the back of the head. Making him yelp and grab the back of his head.

"What was that for, Linda?"

"Because you're clearly stupid if you haven't gotten this girl yet. You're not supposed to let the good ones get away" She said as she rolled her eyes and now the discomfort feeling was back as she went to get us coffee.

"So Noah, he's your son?" Elliot asked even though it sounded more like a statement, either wait the mention of Noah always made me smile.

"Yeah, he's my pride and joy, hes my everything"

"I'm happy for you, Liv" He told me honestly but I knew there was more to his words so I stayed quiet, but the silence was broken as Linda came back with our coffees and looked at Elliot again shaking her head as she walked away.

"Whats his full name?" And there it was. Even though Elliot tried to ask it in a casual tone, I knew he was asking me who his dad was and if I was with him. I crossed my arms and leaned back into the seat as I let out a breath.

"Noah Porter Benson" I said making it obvious that Noah was mine and no one else's. I expected Elliot to be relieved when I said that but instead his eyebrows shot up to his hairline and his jaw dropped, and he almost looked angry.

"You're kidding me"

"Why would I kid about that, and what does it matter to you? Sorry I didn't run it by you, Elliot. You know like how you ran your retirement plan by me before leaving. Oh wait, that's right you didn't." I said with venom in my tone.

"I may have fucked up, Liv and I will be apologizing for that for the rest of my life, but because I left you run to the worst person you could think of!" He spat with an angered whisper.

'What the fuck was he talking about' I thought to myself

"I mean, Haden was bad, Cassidy, don't even get me started, the dumbass from the paper Kurt Moss, but PORTER, you ran to fucking Porter" Now I knew what he was talking about, Noah Porter Benson, I never even thought of that before.

"Elliot, I'm not with Porter." He looked up at me with relief. "And he is not Noah's father." Confusion was obvious on Elliots face.

"We had a case 6 years ago, a woman named Ellie Porter she was a prostitute and her boyfriend Johnny Drake was a sex trafficker. A bunch of shit had happened and we went to a location where a bunch of child pornographers were meeting, did a bust and I uh" I started to get choked up at the thought but I took a breath and continued.

"I uhm I found Noah in a drawer and I picked him up and when we locked eyes it was just, there was a connection that I couldn't explain."

"So you've had him since then?" Elliot asked and I shook my head no

"It was never simple, he was placed in foster care and they found out he had a viral infection so they brought him to the hospital and I went to see him everyday, then he went through 3 more foster homes in a span of 2 months, eventually Ellie found out and she wanted Noah back. The judge agreed if she had gotten clean. So I helped her, I stayed in contact with her and tried to do what I could to get her back on track and stay clean. She was so close, and the night before the trial she had snuck out of the group home and gotten high" I said and started to tear up, Elliot had reached over and grabbed my hand to give me the support to keep going.

"She snuck out and got high, and that night she was gang raped and set on fire. So that left Noah without a mother. I went to the trial the next day to see what would happen with him, I wanted to make sure he would go to a good home. I was standing in the back and then Judge Linden asked if I was the one who found Noah, and asked me if I would be interested in fostering Noah. I was honestly so surprised after being turned down countless times, I told her yes and Noah came home with me. Of course Johnnys lawyer did not like it so they fought to have Noah removed, and Linden ruled them out. So much shit had gone on, and 3 years later Langan was at my door to tell me I was approved for adoption, so we went back to see Linden where she legally made me Noah's mother and he became Noah Porter Benson" I said with teary eyes and a smile as I thought back to the happiest day of my life.

"You saved his life, Liv"

"No, he saved mine" I told him as I wiped a tear that had fallen.

"No one deserves it more than you, Liv" Elliot said bringing me out of my trance, we weren't here to catch up, I actually had to talk to him about the comments Eli was telling Noah.

"Anyways, I wanted to talk about some of the things Eli has been telling Noah, I'm not mad at Eli and I don't blame him, I mean he has been helping Noah and I am so grateful for that, but you have to talk to him."

"Okay, but it couldn't have been that bad, I mean he is a kid, he's always so respectful" Elliot tried to defend

"I'm not saying that he's not, he is repeating what he has heard"

"Oh"

"Noah has been giving me attitude lately and last night he called me a bitch, now I don't think that part was from Eli, but possibly Eli's friends if Noah is around them too. But then he pushed me and said I wanted him to go to bed so I could go to work and have sex" Elliot looked at me with the same confusion I wore the night before.

"I asked him why he thought that, and he said his friends mom used to yell at his daddy whenever Eli would go to bed that he was only going to work to have sex with his slut partner. And that his mom often referred to his partner as the whore he was screwing around with" Elliots' eyes widened he knew Kathy had said things like this many times, he just didn't know Eli had ever heard, nor that he understood what was happening.

"Olivia, I am so sorry for the shit Kathy sa-"

"I don't care about what Kathy thinks of me, whatever happens between you and your wife is bet-"

"EX wife" Elliot interrupted making it known that they were indeed divorced now.

"Either way, I don't care what she thinks, what I care about was that it got back to my son, and now he thinks I go to work to have sex and to avoid him and then we will have to live in separate houses"

"Liv, I'm sorry. For everything, but for right now especially I am sorry that Noah had to hear that and think that you were leaving him when you went to work. I promise I will talk to Eli about what he says, and I'm going to have to sit down with him and see how he's doing. I never realized how much he had been affected by all of this, but clearly he had been." I felt bad for Elliot, one thing you could never say about him was he was a bad father. He was an absolutely amazing father, he may have not always been around but he was always there for them, he would die for his children, and he did everything and more to make sure his kids were happy, healthy, and safe. I always admired that about Elliot. I could tell that he was beating himself up now and replaying my words in his head, he felt like a bad father now.

"You're a great dad, Elliot." I told him truthfully and he looked up at me and shook his head.

"I didn't even realize how much my son had been hurting, dad of the year award goes to me"

"El, you have done everything for your kids. It may have been a while since I have last seen you, but one thing I know is your ability to be an amazing dad to your kids has and never will change. There was a lot of things you could have done better, but being a father was never something you needed to work on."

We both sat in silence for a while longer finishing our coffees, I saw a text from Fin that we caught a case so I knew it was time to go.

"We got a case, so I uhm" I froze, should I say bye, or see you later, or see you around? Eli and Noah were obviously hanging out and I wanted to be as involved with my sons life as possible but that meant being around Eli, and being around Eli meant being around Elliot.

"Go, New York can only survive without Wonder Woman for so long" Elliot told me with a smile as I got out of the booth and started to walk away till I felt him grab my wrist

"Hey Liv?" I turned around to see what he was going to say

"Eli was going to ask Noah if him and his mom wanted to join us this weekend at the Yankees game, I had gotten 4 tickets and since the three of us had been practicing ball for a few months now, I thought Noah and his parent would like to come"

"Wait, the three of you? You're the one thats been playing ball with Noah? You're Mr. S" I said to myself as I connected the dots, this was the man who was helping Noah at school. I knew his friend and occasionally his friends dad were helping him when they would invite Noah to play with them, but I did not realize Mr. S had been Mr. Elliot Stabler this whole time.

"Yeah, the kid has a mean swing" Elliot chuckled and honestly I was thankful, although I wasn't aware that Elliot had been a male figure in Noah's life and I was happy that it had been a good man like Elliot.

"Thank you, El. I mean that. Thank you for looking out for Noah, I've felt guilt about him not having a male figure in his life, and you and Eli just welcomed him in your boys club and gave him that."

"He's a good kid, Liv. You've raised a really good boy. With or without male figures, he would've been fine." We stood there looking at each other for a few seconds and I looked at my watch and said again that I had to go.

"Liv, this weekend?" Elliot asked again

"Uh I will think about it, see you later, Elliot" I said as I walked out of the diner thinking about what I said.

'See you later' I had already made up my mind that I planned on seeing him again, I wasn't sure when, I wasn't sure if I would go this weekend, but I was going to see him again.

I pushed the thoughts out of my mind as I made my way into the 1-6 and saw my team, everyone was working hard as per usual and I knew it was time to get serious.

"Fin, what do we got?"

"16 year old raped and beaten she was found at the Staten Island dump"

"Time of death?"

"Not available" He said and I looked at him confused

"Why not?"

"Shes still alive" I shook my head with disgust. It's hard to know in those moments if you want to live or die. I have been in the same situation. When I was kidnapped there was a point, many points actually when I didn't care if he killed me, I would have rather been dead than replay everything that had happened to me in my mind over and over again. But then there was times of fight, times that I knew I didn't just need to survive, I wanted to.

We made our way into the hospital and into Emmas room. This poor girl had just woken up, she was covered in bruises, cuts, burns, and bite marks, but what surprised me when I walked in was her smile. In all of my years of doing this I had never seen a victim in this position smile.

"Hi Emma, I'm Detective Benson, and this is Detective Tutuola are you ok with him being in here with us?" I had to ask every vicitim because of the trauma they just endured was most likely a male.

"Yes, it's ok"

"So do you want to tell us what happened?"

"My friend, Cara and I went to a house party and we knew we shouldn't have drank but everyone was so we had a couple"

"Was it someone at the party who did this?"

"No, we had a few drinks and we both were feeling funny and decided we should go home, everything was a blur, but when we got to Nonis pizza place two men had grabbed us from behind and pulled us into an alley way. Cara wasn't moving and I knew why so I fought and I kept fighting"

"Do you know what they looked like, Emma?"

"One guy was about 6 feet tall bright green eyes and blond hair, reeked of cigarettes, the other one was brown hair brown eyes and he was about 6'5, he kept saying it's just like before"

I wrote down her details and allowed her to keep describing what had happened.

"Just like before? Did you know him?"

"No, I had never seen him before. But I remember by older brother gave me his pocket knife and told me to always keep it on me no matter what, so I reached for it and stabbed the guy that was holding Cara down in the leg. Once he let her go I kept telling her to run"

"Emma, may I ask why you stabbed him and not the one who was hurting you?"

"I couldn't let it happen again" She whispered

"Let what happen again, honey?"

"Cara was raped 2 years ago by her brothers friend. That's why she was so lifeless, it had already happened to her once, I couldn't let it happen again. If that meant I had to take it instead of her, then that's what I had to do. So I did" I was shocked by her words, that's why she was smiling, she had saved her best friend from having to go through the same ordeal a second time in her life.

"You are such a brave young woman, Emma. You did not deserve this at all, and neither did Cara"

"I couldn't let my best friend go through that again, last time she was alone. She tried to kill herself, she was just a shell of the person she really was. She was going through so much and she was alone, I made sure that she would never have to go through anything bad alone again. She is like my sister, our moms were friends since elementary. When you love someone you stick by them." When she said this I thought back to Elliot, I was upset for him leaving me, but he was going through all of this alone, and like this 16 year old had said, if you love someone you stick by them.

We finished our interview, and the rape kit was doe, then Fin told uni's to go to the location and look for the knife. As we were walking out I had bumped into someone. I looked up to apologize and gave another confused look for what would have been the millionth time today it seemed.

"Elliot?"

"Liv! I'm gla-"

"What are you doing here?"

"Noah got sick at sch-"

"What! Noah is here?" I asked in a panic as I ran into the room that Elliot had just come out of and saw my baby boy sitting in a hospital bed playing a game on Elliots phone

"Baby, are you ok? What happened?" I asked as I went to his bed to hold him close

"I just had bumped my head a little then I threw up" Noah said like it wasn't a big deal but he obviously had a concussion and I was worried. I looked up and saw Elliot in the doorway holding a bag of chips for Noah.

"Why are you here?" I asked him but it came out rather rudely.

"I'm sorry, I just mean wh-"

"Liv, it's fine I know what you meant. You forgot this at the diner" Elliot said holding up my phone.

"I went to go to the 1-6 to give it back but a blond woman said you were on a case she was going to hold it for you but I wasn't sure who you would want holding onto your things so I kept up, 5 minutes later the school called looking for you saying that Noah was playing and he hit his head on the playground and then threw up, they knew it was a concussion but since he threw up within 5 minutes of it happening they called 911 to bring him here. I didn't want him to be alone, and I wasn't sure where you were so I came down to sit with him." In that moment, everything had been forgotten as I started to cry I made my way closer to Elliot and hugged him tightly silently thanking him for not letting my baby boy be alone and keeping him calm while I was gone.

"Lieu, we got DNA back on the Mendez case, Carisi said as him and Fin walked in to the room Fin saw me run into earlier.

"Lieu?" Carisi asked

"Stabler?" Fin said but didn't continue as soon as he saw Noah laying in the bed.

"Noah, what're you doing in here, big man?" Fin asked as he made his way over to Noah holding his fist out to pound it.

"Uncle Fin! Uncle Sonny! I bumped my head then I barfed everywhere! It was cool!" Noah said being completely unfazed by the concussion.

"Everywhere!" Fin said with excitement

"Yeah it was like blaaaaghh!" Noah imitated himself vomiting.

I looked up at Elliot he wiped my tears knowing I wouldn't want anyone else to see them and he gave me a soft smile. We still had to talk but as of right now, I couldn't have been more thankful to have him here right now.

"Anyways big man, me and uncle Sonny gotta go catch some bad guys, you start being careful or else we won't be able to go to the park anymore" Fin said as he and Sonny gave Noah a fist pump. They told me they had everything covered and to stay with Noah and if they really needed me they would call.

I sat next to Noah just watching him play his game. I looked at the Band-Aid I put on his head the night before and the goose egg that had formed on the other side.

"So Lieutenant" Elliot started and I looked at him with a smile. "When did that happen?"

"Well after Munch retired, I became Sargent, then Cragen decided he had had enough too, and IAB came and asked me to be Lieutenant so for the last 4 years now that's been my job."

"You deserve it. They couldn't have picked anyone better"

"Thanks, El. Look I am extremely grateful to have you here right now, but we also can't forget everything that happened. We still need to talk about everything and put it out in the open before we can move forward with anything."

"I'm ready to talk as long as you're ready to listen."

"I wasn't before but I think after today, and how you've been with Noah in the past months, I think I know owe it to you to give you a chance to talk and for me to actually listen"

"I don't want this to be the only reason you listen to me" Ellio said motioning around the hospital room. "I want you to listen to me because you want to, and because you're ready"

"I am" I told him simply and for once I was.

"I can come by tonight with pizza and we can talk?" Elliot offered and Noahs ears perked up by the mention of pizza

"Pizza!"

"Noah, remember what we said"

"But mommy, I'm hurt" He milked giving me puppy dog eyes, that I really couldn't say no to"

"Fine, but after this you will try new things, deal?" I asked holding my pinky out for him to interlock with his and when he did he gave me a big grin and said "Deal"

"Is he not allowed pizza?" Elliot asked

"No, I'm just trying to show him other foods besides pizza."

"Sorry Liv, I didn't know. I can bring something else"

"No no, it's fine, I think after the day we have all had I can allow it this one last time"

We smiled at each other and Elliot left by 2:00 to go pick Eli up from school, bu 4:00pm we were released from the hospital and made our way home while we waited for Elliot and Eli to show up. By 5:30 I heard a knock at the door and I looked through the peephole out of habit and unlocked the door letting Elliot and Eli in.

We sat around eating pizza, while the boys talked about baseball, around 6:30, I told the boys they could watch a movie while Elliot and I went to talk in my bedroom. I didn't put a T.V in Noahs room so I had to keep them entertained in the living room. I poured myself a glass of wine, and then took the bottle with me, thinking it would be necessary. I grabbed a beer for Elliot as I made my way to my room to talk with Elliot.

Elliot was sitting on my bed as I handed him a beer and sat next to him taking a sip of my wine.

"So, let's talk." I told him