Courage Is A Woman
Chapter 11.
Bridges Between Us
After a quick stop at Starbucks they decided to walk the short distance to the bridge. For a few minutes they debated whether to walk it now or save it for later, but Scully quickly commented that they might be too tired later today and Stella agreed, so they made their way to City Hall Park and onto the Brooklyn Bridge. It was a long walk, crowded with a lot of tourists and some locals trying to pass, but it was sunny and the company was good so they soon relaxed and just casually strolled up the bridge at their own pace, they weren't in any rush after all.
Stella had called one of her local acquaintances yesterday during a bathroom break and had told him she was in town and wanted to show someone a special view. He owned one of the buildings on the waterside of Brooklyn, right by the Brooklyn and Manhattan Bridge and he'd been happy to provide access to the rooftop since they had known each other for a long time and they had helped each other out before. Also, she suspected he still had a thing for her so she knew that might have helped as well, although she wasn't interested it still was a plus. Stella hadn't told Dana about this because she wanted it to be a surprise, one last thing they did together before they would have to leave. It was a bittersweet feeling, because the day was so beautiful but it had a dark edge. Somehow she felt herself drift towards that inevitable end, no grip or firm hold on her true feelings. She just felt like she was moving along at a steady pace towards a black hole, no possibility of stopping, no intention to try. It felt like the time they did have left was more precious that way – if she didn't try to prolong it, it felt like there was less pressure. Next to her, however, she felt a growing anxiety coming from Dana who seemed to desperately be hanging on to every second. She had asked Stella a couple of times to be present today, to stay in the moment with her, and there was really nothing Stella wanted to do more but it just meant they were approaching the darkness together. She was afraid Dana didn't see it coming and wouldn't be prepared when it finally hit, but she also knew from what little history they had shared that there had been pain in Dana's past. She just hated knowing that she'd be the cause of it this time. Also, in realizing this Stella found another truth: She'd be hurt as well, but she'd be able to deal with it, she always had. With her head held high she'd go out and find a way to deal with the pain, the loneliness, and before long she would be able to hide her pain from everyone including herself. Dana however would always have this pain close to the surface, readable in her eyes like every other thing that had happened to her and it would suit her, but it would hurt her and Stella didn't want to dwell on it too long. She knew it wasn't within her power to help Dana but it was within her nature to try and the fact that Dana was the first person she'd loved in this way in a very long time was not doing anything to ease her worry.
Still as Stella slowly wandered along the Brooklyn Bridge with Dana by her side she felt a sense of peace. The weather was beautiful, just cold enough for the long blazer jacket she'd picked out to go over her blouse and warm enough for Dana's loosely knitted sweater to be worn without a coat. They linked arms, Scully looping through Stella's right arm and matching her speed. Scully hid her chin in the roll neck on her jumper and sighed deeply. 'Cold?' Stella asked, glancing to her right. 'Not in the slightest,' Dana replied. 'I'm curious to see where you're taking me.' Stella smiled. 'Don't get too excited, you'll be disappointed.' 'I doubt that,' Scully said. 'I can't believe I've also never done this before.' 'You mean walk the Bridge?' Stella said. 'You didn't have a reason, I guess,' she answered her own question. 'But I think that goes for many first experiences.' Scully looked down for a moment and smiled at her feet, grateful for their privacy in the crowd. 'So,' Stella continued, 'How do you like our date so far? How have I done?' Scully looked over to her left, studying Stella's profile for a moment. She couldn't read it, but she liked the calmness she saw in it. 'Like I said before, breathtaking,' she replied. A silence followed as both women's minds traveled back to that special moment when Scully had called Stella 'love'. Stella knew she had meant to provoke a conversation, and she'd intently avoided it before but now she felt like she needed to say something. 'It's been a long time since I've cared for someone the way I care for you,' she started and she felt Scully focus her attention fully without looking at her. Her arm tensed slightly around Stella's and her shoulders squared a little, and all Stella wanted to do was comfort her, tell her no, it's all right. It's just good things I'm about to say. However she knew Dana didn't need mothering and she had more important things to say so she soldiered on. 'It's been... Close to fifteen years, I think, since I've last told someone I loved them. It nearly killed me in the end.' Dana stopped and turned towards Stella, their arms still linked. 'You don't have to do this,' she said as if she knew what Stella was about to say. 'I do,' Stella answered bravely, sighing deeply before continuing her path up the bridge. Scully followed her lead, pulling her a little closer than before, grasping Stella's lower arm with her right hand as well. 'You've seen the scars,' Stella said softly. 'So you know how I coped with the pain. They date back to high school but it continued well after that.' 'I've seen them, yes,' Dana replied. 'But I've also seen you cope in other ways. Back in the park you were so strong hiding your feelings from me, swallowing them up and powering through. I know how strong you are.' Stella huffed. 'It's not strength, it's weakness. It's all still there, it's just hidden. I suppose I'll find out soon enough how well I've hidden it.' Scully stopped again. They'd reached one of the arches and Stella felt Dana guide her to one of the walls, sitting her down on a bench there. Stella had hoped they could keep walking – the intensity of her feelings needed to be directed out into the world, not directly at Dana because then she couldn't pretend she was just saying things. Stella needed a kind of anonymity in this moment, the kind she wouldn't get here on this bench and it was slightly scary.
Scully watched Stella as she sat down and instantly saw the flicker of despair in her eyes. 'Look,' she said. 'We'll see each other again. We'll keep in touch. It won't be goodbye if we don't want it to be.' Stella nodded slowly before turning to Dana. 'And we'll slowly lose touch, creating but distant memories in our mind and body that will resurface when we don't want them to. I know, I've been there. What I need you to know and remember from all of this is that you are the first person in a long time to make me realize I'm capable of this kind of love,' she said to Dana. 'I don't mean to say I love you because I can't, but I will call you my love because it's the best I can do.' Scully looked at her for a moment, trying to fully understand what Stella had just said. Sometimes it was hard, navigating the deep psychological maze that was Stella's words and eyes, the mixed signals they sent and the truths they spoke of, but somehow she'd gotten pretty good at it over the past three days. She knew Stella wouldn't say this if it weren't true. She also knew it must take a lot of trust and bravery from her to open up on a day like today where everything mattered and everything felt new. Last night they had hit their first obstacle, a moment of detachment where they had both needed each other but turned away, and after that everything had felt frail and thin as a newly frozen lake. However this conversation was much needed and wanted for both of them, because it meant they could finally try and tell each other how they felt and have their doubts disappear like morning ice on a sunrise. Scully understood what Stella had said, she doubted if Stella was capable of saying she loved anyone because it made her feel vulnerable beyond comfort or imagination and Scully respected that. She and Mulder had taken a very long time to say the words, and when they had, it hadn't felt the way she had wanted or expected it to. She didn't need Stella to say it, she just needed a little clarity before they would inevitably separate. She felt rushed, unable to grasp the moment and cherish it. Talking to Stella like this and being truthful to her and to herself might help her to at least slow her down a little. 'I told you before I'm in a relationship and that it's not the healthiest relationship,' she started. 'I don't know where it's going and I'm not sure how I want to continue. And even though I don't know how often we'll see each other or if we'll get to talk a lot I know you changed my life. I wanted this to be a break, a vacation of some sorts because I needed it and at that moment this happened. I would never have thought about doing the things we did if it weren't for you. You've shown me parts of myself I've neglected for a long time and it's time to refocus on myself.' Stella looked at Dana while she talked, taking note of the way her eyes seemed to trace lines from Stella's to the brick wall behind them and back across Stella's face. She knew the sacrifice Scully was making, and she appreciated her all the more for it. 'It sounds strange but I've felt since the first day we met that I understand you,' Scully ended. 'It's a little weird but I think it's why we get along so well.' 'I'd say we do more than get along,' Stella smiled softly. Scully returned the smile and stood to start walking again. 'We do, and you're very important to me.' Stella looped her arm through Dana's this time as they continued their way up the bridge. Their conversation went on, without words, but their minds stayed in touch as both of them went over the events of the past few days. 'You do know that my icy exterior can be a form of protection, don't you,' Stella stated after a while. 'I do,' Scully said softly. 'And I understand it if that's how you deal with this. I just need to know that it's meant more to you than just sex.' Stella stopped her this time, turning Scully around to face Manhattan's skyline. 'Do you see that?' she asked, hear head just behind Dana's. Dana nodded as she felt Stella's breath on her ear. 'That's a view that people would die to see. People dream of coming here and never get to go. This morning I came close to asking you not to go out, because I wanted to spend the day in a hotel room talking to you. We're in New York, for fuck's sake, and I don't care one bit. I just wanted to get to know you better.' 'Then why didn't you?' Dana challenged, softly, because she knew. 'Because we don't have that luxury,' Stella replied intently. 'I could spend a week just sitting next to you talking about our lives, past and future but the more I know the more I'll want.' Dana turned around, finding herself between the bridge's fence and Stella's body. She wasn't trapped, but she felt she wanted to be as she pulled Stella in a little closer. 'I would have said yes,' Scully said and kissed Stella softly before relaxing a little into the touch. Stella kissed her back, the tip of her tongue lightly teasing Scully's lips before she pulled back. 'That's why I didn't ask,' Stella replied and this time she grasped Dana's hand, clasping their fingers together before burying their hands in her coat pocket. 'Let's keep going, we have an appointment to keep,' Stella teased.
About half an hour later they were descending the stairs leading them back onto the street. Stella had released Dana's hand as she had lead the way down, finding herself immediately miss Dana's warmth. She was still debating whether it was time to learn to live without or if she could allow herself the simple pleasure for a little longer when Dana came up next to her again and sought out Stella's hand in her pocket. A smile crossed Stella's face. 'Come on,' she said softly, guiding Dana through traffic to the other side of the road. It had occurred to Dana on the way down that their hands had been the thing that had connected them throughout this whole experience – they had held hands for the first time through Central Park, and even back then Dana had already known what was developing. Now, not even that much later, it seemed like a lifetime of experiences, love and pain had been shared even if had only been three days, and it had all happened while they were holding hands. Scully had never been much of a hand holder, but with Stella it seemed like the only fitting way to quietly tell her she was still there. Also, Stella's hands felt small and dainty in hers and it gave her a sense of strength and empowerment and she loved it, because it made her feel equal and not like an accessory like holding a man's hand sometimes did. Holding Stella's inside of her coat pocket was saving her right now, keeping her grounded and the moment real and she wasn't ready to let that go. She followed Stella through a few streets down to Washington Street, where the iconic sight of the Manhattan Bridge towering above the Empire State Building greeted them in the autumn sun. Scully still had no idea where they were going and she pulled Stella a little closer as they kept walking quietly through the small streets that made up this area of Brooklyn. Stella took Scully to the park covering the riverbank, wandering along the small footpaths laid out along the water. She pulled her to the side only once, to softly kiss Dana's hand before pointing out a view, and after that little show of intimacy she released Dana's hand to give her some space. Stella had never thought of herself as clingy – in fact, that was the last thing she wanted to be and even though their time here was limited and ticking away by the second Stella felt it become more and more important to remember who she was before all of this. Soon enough she'd be alone again and although she'd dreaded it before she had never felt the suffocating feeling of darkness loom as heavy right along the edge of her vision like it was starting to every quiet second they were walking together. She knew that to withdraw was the complete opposite of what Dana had asked of her, but she'd seen the darkness before and in the end this was about her own survival. Where today was light, tomorrow felt dark and lonely and Stella knew that if she went in unprepared she'd suffer greatly, so she let go of Dana's hand and took the lead down a path towards a Pebble Beach. She was taking a bit of a detour to her destination, the feeling of missing out scaring her more than the pressure of time. She had become a master of getting the most out of limited time and even if she wasn't particularly proud of that skill it did come in handy sometimes.
Scully followed Stella down the path, knowing this area of Brooklyn a little she knew the wonderful spots that were hidden here. She'd been to the theatre here once, when it had just opened, and she remembered walking along these paths later at night, alone, with lights all around her. Now, there was only one light, and it was Stella who was guiding her along to a destination still unbeknownst to Scully. 'Where are we going?' she dared to ask. 'I feel like you're stalling.' Stella glanced back and their eyes met shortly before Stella focused her sight back on the path ahead. 'I'm not, I'm just enjoying walking here with you.' 'It's okay,' Dana replied because she knew it wasn't the truth, 'I wasn't complaining, I like it.' Stella stopped and turned, and the vulnerability in her eyes hit Dana square in the heart. 'I don't know how to let you go,' Stella said softly. 'I know you want me to worry about that later and I know you need me to be here with you but I'm afraid. Tomorrow I'm going to sit on a plane for eight hours flying further and further away from you and I don't know how to do that.' Scully searched Stella's eyes for more of an answer but there wasn't any, and that was the biggest answer of all. She sighed. 'I've spent a long time trying to run away from feelings,' she started, 'but what I've found is that if you do, and things get bad, there's just going to be more regrets. We can spend a lifetime running but the best moments come when we dare to stop.' Stella blinked at her, her face betraying a ferocious grip on self-control but also a deep blue desire to let go. 'I haven't learned how myself,' Scully said on a sad smile, 'but I know I can't do today alone and I want you with me.' Stella nodded, her gaze slowly softening to the woman in front of her. 'I'm trying,' she said and her voice betrayed everything her face hadn't. Scully pursed her lips in understanding before reaching for Stella's hand again. 'Come on, silly, show me where you were taking me.'
Their hands stayed out in the open and Stella was honored that Scully didn't seem to mind. She caught the redhead glancing down at them a few times but never did she flinch or hesitate when they encountered other people. Stella felt proud to show Scully off to the world, even though she wasn't hers to begin with. It was a bittersweet and new emotion that was soon to be crushed as tomorrow was still coming for them one second at a time. Still, Stella felt a little better knowing that Scully understood her struggle and seemed to accept her emotional limitations and shortcomings. They were close to the building she was meeting Liam at, and she knew Scully would appreciate what was waiting for them. They walked under the Manhattan Bridge to the small park there, and they were met with a slightly more industrial environment as the area was clearly still being redeveloped. Stella loved this about New York, it was never finished although it was always ready. Kind of like life, she thought, as she gently pulled Scully towards the front door of the glass building.
Stella opened the door and gestured for Scully to go inside. Scully didn't recognize the building and had no idea what was inside. There was a reception desk, white and crisp, and a few people who looked like they belonged there were talking to the receptionist. It looked quite corporate, Scully thought, and she couldn't help but smile as she saw a good looking man approach Stella with open arms. 'Stella!' the man called. 'How great to see you, how are you?' 'Good, Liam, good,' Stella answered. 'It's nice to see you again.' Stella hugged him shortly and pulled back, gesturing towards Dana. 'This is Dana Scully, Dana, this is Liam. He's a former agent and now runs financial investigations for us here in the United States.' Scully raised an eyebrow. 'Don't worry,' Liam said in what Scully thought was an Irish accent with a touch of Brooklyn, 'Nothing secretive or dangerous. Just having a little fun with the bankers.' Scully smiled and extended her hand. 'Nice to meet you,' she said and Liam shook her hand. He had a firm touch and Scully understood why Stella seemed to like him. 'Stella never graces me with a visit unless she needs something from me,' Liam said, 'but still I'm glad you're here.' Stella regarded him, appearing slightly annoyed to Scully's trained eye. 'I never needed anything from you,' she said, the tone of her voice cautioning Liam but apparently challenging him as well. 'Well, you did have a thing for me back in the day,' he teased but Stella wasn't too amused. 'You seem to confuse infatuation with professional interest,' she stated, 'and it's good to see you're still handling the rejection well.' Liam raised his eyebrows in recognized defeat before taking a step back, the smile around his lips betraying his amusement. 'So,' he said, 'You're here to get on the roof, aren't you.' Scully looked at Stella, who cocked her head to the side and pursed her lips at Liam. 'There goes that surprise,' she said mildly sarcastic and Liam grinned. 'Right, you mentioned that it was a surprise. Sorry.' Stella knew Liam had probably spoiled it on purpose, to get under her skin, and that was exactly the reason she had never wanted or taken anything from Liam that wasn't strictly professional. He was a risk taker, like herself, but he lacked the personal restraint she depended on for her survival. He would always challenge her and go just a tad bit too far, to that point where Stella wasn't actually in control, and even though it had been tempting back in the day Liam had already had alarm bells all around him. Still she'd built a friendship and professional relationship with him that lasted throughout the years, even though they hardly communicated beyond the occasional e-mail or phone call if they were going to be traveling. Stella had seen Liam maybe three times in the past five years and ever since he had moved to New York she had rarely thought about him. Still, it was good to see him and she was glad she remembered his graciously cheeky personality correctly.
'Let's go then,' Liam led the way towards the elevators. 'Here is the key, there's someone up there who will take your order if you would like anything to drink.' He handed Stella a key, apparently to the rooftop, and gestured for them to get in the lift. 'You can stay up there as long as you like. I'll come and check on you in a bit.' He winked at Stella and left them alone. 'Rooftop, huh,' Scully leaned in and whispered to Stella. 'It was supposed to be a surprise,' Stella whispered back. 'He seems like a handful,' Scully said. 'He is,' Stella agreed. 'I've known him for years and it's good to see him again, but I'm standing by my decision to keep things from becoming personal with him.' 'I can see why,' Scully said, 'although I can imagine it being a challenge, he is quite handsome.' 'I suppose,' Stella said, 'but it's about more than that.' Scully nodded. 'I know. So, he owns the building? Or does he just work here?' Stella smiled. 'He thinks he owns the building. He owns the company and he is using it to house different departments, and he also re-purposed the top floor into a company lunchroom with a view. You'll see what I mean when we get up there.' As if on cue the elevator pinged and announced their arrival on the top floor. The doors opened into a light but industrial café, with large wooden beams running across the ceiling and all different kinds of chairs and tables everywhere. Scully understood the style immediately, although it clashed with the reception a little she could imagine people coming here for lunch and enjoying their break. She followed Stella, who greeted the bar personnel like she knew them, through a few rows of tables to a door at the back of the building. Using the key she unlocked it and opened the door, leading Scully onto the roof. There was a wooden path laid out to guide them through a maze of a few air conditioning units and other mechanical setups and Scully bit her lip in amusement – it was clearly not their final destination but she loved how Stella seemed to rush through it. As they reached the corner Stella stopped and gestured for Scully to continue. 'Go ahead, ms Scully,' she said proudly. Scully looked at her for a second before turning the corner.
What she found there would stay with her through many hard times to come. Seldom had someone surprised her like this, and even though it wasn't in her nature to be stunned by things the sight in front of her had her glued in the spot for a second.
Before her was a terrace, neatly paved with a few plants and trees and tables and benches set up for comfort. The rooftop was lined by a glass wall that reached all the way down to the floor, giving the illusion of no railing as it gave free view to the left of the Manhattan Bridge and many of New York's most famous buildings beyond that. To the right Scully could see all the way along the river past the Williamsburg Bridge, and she could say it was truly the best view she had ever seen. Even this morning's experience was topped, because this was so much more special, more personal and to know that Stella wanted to share this place with her made it incredible. The sun shone brightly and the wind caught her hair as she turned back towards Stella, who was leaning against the wall, watching her. 'Come here,' Dana said and reached back for her. Stella pushed herself off the wall and walked towards Dana. Scully took Stella's face in her hands and kissed her hard, not knowing how to put her feelings into words. Stella felt Dana's lips catch hers, her tongue pushing past Stella's lips into her accepting mouth. 'Thank you,' she whispered in between, and Stella shook her head lightly. 'Kiss me,' she just answered between touches.
When they finally broke apart Stella caught Dana glancing to the windows behind them. 'Don't worry about them,' Stella said as she walked towards the glass. 'It's none of their business.' Scully followed Stella to stand next to her on the edge of the building. She looked down into the small park below them where a dog was playing with a ball and people were sitting, walking and jogging. 'How often have you been here?' Scully asked, still in awe. 'Just a few times. You're the first person I bring up here with me.' 'It's very special,' Scully said, moving towards the right side of the building to overlook more of Brooklyn. There was a wooden bench with outdoor pillows, and suddenly Scully's legs felt tired. 'Sit with me,' she gestured to Stella who was still on the other side. 'In a minute,' Stella answered, and that's when Scully understood. This was the one place where Stella could think clearly. Scully had a few of those, but they were sacred and rare, and she knew the importance of having places like this if one's mind wasn't enough. So she nodded and let Stella be for a while as she sat down on the bench and tried to memorize all the buildings she saw. This was a place and time she never wanted to forget.
Stella saw how Dana turned away and gave her a moment and it made her want to be at her side even more. However she knew she had to take a minute, take in the view and think back to the times she'd been here and how it had helped her. This place was like a rock to her, something she'd always have to fall back on when at times life got too much to bear, she could always book a ticket and come here. She never did, but it was a comfort to know it was a possibility. She had cried here before, shouted and cursed and she'd said goodbye to parts of herself here on this rooftop. She hadn't actually realized it before coming here but it was true – she wanted to show this to Dana because this place represented the best and worst parts of her.
Only when she turned around to go to Dana did she realize there were tears running down her cheeks. Wiping them away she sniffed before joining Dana, who turned towards her. 'Did it help?' she asked softly. Stella smiled without looking at Dana. 'Yes. I didn't mean to cry.' 'It's okay,' Scully said and Stella heard something else in Dana's voice. Meeting her eyes she saw that Dana too had been crying. 'Are you okay?' she asked, slightly worried. Scully nodded. 'I understand what this place means to you and it's an honor to be here with you. Thank you.' Stella leaned in and kissed Scully softly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear before looking behind them. 'I'm going to see if I can get us something to drink,' she said and Scully watched as Stella stood and walked back towards the windows. A gesture followed and soon a waiter appeared from the side of the building. Stella exchanged some words with him before turning back to Scully. 'I told him to bring us lunch and fuck off,' she smiled. 'Not in those words, I hope,' Scully grinned. 'He got the point,' Stella answered.
Ten minutes later the waiter appeared with a bottle of wine and two burgers, causing Scully to raise an eyebrow at Stella. 'It's my favorite,' Stella said and put a plate in front of Dana. She thanked the waiter and Scully watched him leave before they were alone again. She saw the lights go out inside and she frowned for a moment. 'What about the company staff?' she asked. Stella shrugged. 'The sixth floor cafeteria is perfectly acceptable. And don't worry, if we need more wine I know where to find it.' 'My God,' Scully said, feeling a little elated. 'Either you're paying Liam or he is way in your debt.' 'Oh, neither,' Stella answered. 'He just thinks he has some power over me and he likes to think I owe him. I like to take advantage of his urge to show off. He knows it and doesn't care.' She watched how Dana raised an eyebrow and accepted Stella's statement. 'Ok,' she said, and took a bite of the burger.
It didn't take long for both of them to finish their burgers because they had been walking for a while, building up an appetite without being aware of it. As Scully finished the last of her bun Stella poured wine into two glasses, handing one to Dana. 'To us,' she stated, and Dana shook her head softly in wonder. 'To us. Let us never forget this experience.' 'Oh, I won't,' Stella reassured her. Their glasses touched and for a moment Stella and Dana were lost in their own thoughts as they sipped the wine.
Scully thought back to the day before she'd left for New York. She had been ready to leave for a few days, needing to get away from Mulder and his toxic influence that was starting to get to her again. She had left before, at a time like this, but she'd inevitably found her way back. There was no doubt in her mind that she'd go back to him, she always did, however this time she'd be a little different. There would be a lot to talk about and he'd undoubtedly be hurt and confused, but he deserved the truth. Eight years ago she had decided to leave because she had seen no other option but it had only taken her three weeks to find her way back to him. Ever since that day they'd had their own places, an apartment downtown and an unremarkable house that was home to both of them. She lived wherever she felt like staying but she still found herself in their house most of the time, and even if it was the one place out of the two where she wasn't alone it was where she felt the loneliest. Although Scully thought about it a lot it had been a very long while since they'd actually discussed their relationship and what it meant to them. The thought of leaving Mulder was unbearable yet it was something that was on her mind daily. Who was she if they weren't Scully and Mulder? She loved him, without a doubt, but somehow they had grown too comfortable in not communicating that Scully wasn't even sure he knew who she was anymore. He never paid attention to her anymore, never actually looked at her like he used to.
Stella watched for a while as she saw Dana disappear into her thoughts. After several minutes she leaned back, body turned towards Scully. 'Penny for your thoughts.' 'Nothing,' Scully responded quickly before smiling apologetically. 'Sorry. I was thinking about what I'm going to do when I get home. It's complicated and I don't even know how to start explaining it to you but you have to trust me to figure it out.' Stella nodded. 'I do. You don't owe me an explanation or anything else. And I don't expect anything from you, Dana. We'll keep in touch and you can figure out what you want to do. I have a lot of work to do when I get home anyway,' she sighed. Scully knew she was referring to the aftermath of her case and the psychological damage it had done. 'I'm glad to hear you're going to take my advice,' she said softly. 'I don't think I have a choice,' Stella answered. Scully nodded. 'You do, and you're very brave for not considering the other option.' Stella smiled and put her hand on Dana's. 'Thank you,' she said before standing and walking off to go inside. Dana watched her go as something inside of her felt constricted and tight, an uncertainty that was her future and it scared her.
Stella came back with two glasses of water and put them down on the table. The wine had been light but still they needed to be hydrated, and Scully smiled at Stella's considerateness. 'Liam asks if there's anything we need,' Stella said. 'Just you,' Scully answered softly and Stella sat down next to her. 'You have me,' Stella answered. 'Is he in there?' Scully asked, indicating the café with a raise of her eyebrow. 'Yes,' Stella said and watched amused as Scully licked her lips and shifted closer to Stella. 'Good,' she said softly before kissing Stella so softly and carefully Stella was afraid she might cry. As Scully pulled back Stella focused on the slightly pouty and cocky smile of Dana's lips. This is why I love you, her brain imagined saying. 'Unexpected,' Stella said, biting her bottom lip. Scully looked down at her with a raised chin. 'That's good, right?' 'Oh, yes,' Stella said as she wrapped an arm around Scully's oat colored wooly jumper and pulled her closer by the waist. They didn't look back to see if Liam was watching, they didn't care. They didn't see him slump his shoulders and call retreat, and they didn't see him glance back over his shoulders at the peaceful display going on on his rooftop before he entered he elevator. That Stella Gibson, he thought. Was she finally happy?