Chapter 4

Ahsoka had been in the refresher for well over an hour now letting the water rinse every drop of blood off of her. She had found out that she wasn't inside of some medical facility but instead a house and the first thing that had been on her mind was getting the blood off of her. She still couldn't wrap her mind around what she had done, it just wasn't like her to do something so violent like that. The fact that she had enjoyed the man's screams of pain as she was killing him frightened her now.

She shivered even as the hot water ran down her body, something was terribly wrong with her she shouldn't have done that but she just couldn't stop herself. She took a deep breath trying to calm her still racing heart and relax a little but she knew she wouldn't until she returned to Corusant back to the Jedi temple where she belonged. "Two years…" she muttered, she still couldn't believe it had she really been gone for that long?

After she made sure she had washed the last bit off blood off of her she turned the water off and got out. Her feet still shook from lack of use so she placed her hand against the wall to steady herself as she dried off. Wrapping the towel around herself she went to find something to wear preferably something that wasn't covered in blood.

After digging through clothes that were either to big she did however find one set of clothes that caught her eye. Her hand grabbed a hold of them "Now why would you have something like this" she said to herself. It was a dark black but soft fabric she noticed as she examined it.

(I suck at descriptions of clothes. The cover art for this story the clothes she is wearing there is the one she is wearing in this story)

After slipping on the attire she realized how comfortable it was, it wasn't to lose and it wasn't super tight either. She wondered why the man she had killed would have something like this, perhaps for his wife if he was married or maybe even a mistress it was hard to say.

She placed her lightsabers on her belt and quickly scanned the room for any credits she could use to get off world. She dug through a couple drawers and found a few, hopefully it would be enough to at least get her to a natural world then she would have to find a way to get to Corusant. Only a fool would travel directly from a Separatists controlled world to a Republic controlled one and she knew better.

Ahsoka began walking toward the door but paused in a mirror to look at herself what she saw however was rather unnerving and alarming. Her orange skin had become pale; her veins had become black to contrast the paleness of her body and her once beautiful crystal blue eyes had turned to a dark mixture of yellow and gold. Her mouth hung open as she stared in the mirror at herself, the color of her eyes is what was most alarming. From what she had learned at the Jedi temple is that a color like this was unnatural and was associated with a darkside user.

Ahsoka shook her head in disbelief at what she saw in the mirror, why did she look this way? Why were her eyes not their normal blue color? What had happened to her that made her look this way? She couldn't focus on this right now, she needed to get back to Corusant back to her master, he would know what to do. She quickly turned and headed out of the door to find a space port.

Today was a much harder day for Anakin, this day in particular was one of the hardest. Today was Ahsoka's eighteenth birthday, she would have been turning eighteen years old today if it had not been for him failing. Anakin eyes hadn't moved from the object he had been staring at for most of the morning, it was a picture of him and Ahsoka taken a couple missions before they had left for Mortis. Tears began to slid down his face as he thought of her, though of what great Jedi she would have become, thought of all the years they would have stood by each others side and exchange stories of their own mission when she would have become a Knight.

He clung to the photo tighter as his blood shot eyes looked steady upon Ahsoka's face. He was her master, her best friend and he had failed her. He had failed to rescue her in time just like he had failed to save his mother all those years ago. "Happy birthday…Ahsoka…I miss you so much" he said with a shaky breath, he drew the photo tight against him and let the tears flow down his face. He would give anything, every tomorrow for just one more day with her, to hear her laugh and see her smile, to her annoyed voice and when she called him Skyguy. He once was loathed the nickname but now he cherished it, he wanted her to call him that again to just be by his side again.

He closed his eyes tightly and just let it all out he just couldn't bare the pain. First his mother and now Ahsoka, who else would die because he had come too late or he hadn't been strong enough to save them. "Please…come back" he cried chocking on his tears, why had the force given him such a great and wonderful padawan just to steal her away from him? Was he damned to suffer like this for his entire life, to lose those closest to him because had was too late?

He looked up toward the ceiling "Please come back!" he begged then slammed his hand against the wall in anger. It just wasn't fair, she was gone and he was alive, if he could go back he would trade her places in a heart beat screw the prophecy he just wanted Ahsoka back. When the tears finally stopped and his breathing steady slightly he felt a gentle hand on the back of his shoulder. For a split second he thought it may be Ahsoka, that somehow she had come back to him, that she hadn't died but as he turned around and saw the face of Obi-wan and his hope was crushed.

Obi-wan didn't say a word and Anakin was grateful the last thing he needed today was someone telling him that it was going to be alright because he knew it wasn't. "Why did it have to be her?" Anakin said aloud, the grasp on his should became tighter and soon Anakin was being hugged by his former master. "I don't know Anakin" Obi-wan replied in a gently and caring tone, "It should have been me" Anakin replied burring his face in his friends shoulder.

Obi-wan let out a small sighed, he had been very saddened by Ahsoka's passing but he knew Anakin was taking it so much harder. "It shouldn't have been anyone Anakin" he replied as he rubbed his friends back gently with a hand. Obi-wan remained by his friend's side comforting him to the best of his ability before he was deployed back out to battle while Anakin staid behind, the Council had said that Anakin was still unfit for duty because of Ahsoka's death.