"You ready to go?" Viktor knocked on the door, making sure Yuuri was dressed. He'd accidentally walked in when Yuuri was changing his shirt a couple of days prior, which had nearly induced a panic attack. Yuuri opened the door, meeting Viktor in the hall. He was fidgeting with the hem of his sweatshirt, nervous. It was understandable, he hadn't left the house in five days. "Are you still dizzy?" Viktor eyed the stairs behind them. They didn't need Yuuri falling again. He just shook his head, but rested his hand on the banister as they descended, easing Viktor's worried mind.

"Heading out?" Yurio questioned as he slung a bag over his shoulder, Otabek doing the same behind him.

"Yes, his appointment is in half an hour." Viktor's brows pulled together at the sight of the bags the two before him were holding. "Where are you going?"

"Yakov set aside some rink time for us." Yurio shrugged. "We haven't practiced in a while. Phichit's coming too, you should stop by after your appointment, if we're still there. If not he's set aside a few hours a day so we can have private practice or his direction."

"Thanks, Yurio."

"Don't thank me, he called and told me I need to get my ass back to the rink soon. Their coaches called him when they found out where they were, too. It was all his doing."

"Well tell him I said thank you." Viktor nodded. "Our ride is here; see you guys later." Viktor waved and lead the way to the car, giving the driver the address of the doctor's office as he and Yuuri crawled in.

"What's up?" Viktor finally forced his mouth to move when they were about halfway to the doctors' office. Yuuri had been fiddling with his sweater sleeves and gnawing on his lip the entire ride. Viktor was reluctant to ask, considering Yuuri hadn't liked to talk about his problems even before his attack. Now he was even more closed off, unless he was scribbling self-deprecating notes.

Yuuri took a moment to write out his response, clearly thinking it over carefully as he rolled the pen between his fingers. He slipped the notebook over to Viktor when he was finished, keeping his gaze down.

I'm nervous. I haven't thought of it like this before, but what if I can't talk because of something physical, not mental?

"I don't think that's the case." Viktor offered his hand, which Yuuri took with almost no hesitation. "The doctor at the hospital said you wouldn't have any permanent physical damage. Your trouble speaking is almost definitely mental."

Almost definitely.

"If it's not, we'll figure it out." Viktor squeezed Yuuri's hand and he squeezed back. It was obvious he was upset about something else, but Viktor didn't want to pressure him too much.

They took the rest of the ride in silence, hands tightly locked, one set of fingers trembling.

When they got to the doctors' office, Yuuri claimed two chairs while Viktor checked him in, figuring it would be much easier to just do the talking for him. Yuuri agreed, figuring people would get annoyed with his current means of communication.

"How are you feeling?" Viktor lowered himself into the seat next to Yuuri, taking in the fairly full and somewhat noisy waiting room. The office that had been recommended to them housed a combination of head trauma specialists as well as pediatricians, and respiratory specialists, which created a less than pleasant symphony of groaning, coughing, and kids.

Physically, fine. Yuuri wrote back. His head wasn't bothering him very much, and his dizziness was pretty much gone. A few sharp turns during the car ride there had sent his head reeling, but when sitting, standing, or walking he felt completely balanced. Of course, the high-pitched screeches emanating from the children's waiting area were aggravating the mild ache in his temple, but they would probably give him a headache even if he wasn't concussed.

Yuuri fidgeted with his sleeves again once Viktor fell silent. He looked around the room, catching some people's eyes as he scanned. As he scanned back, he seemed to catch more glances. The room was pretty full… nineteen people that he could see, including the receptionist at the desk. That wasn't counting the kids he could only hear. Yuuri felt his head begin to spin as twenty eight eyes fell on him, but he wasn't dizzy because of his head, he could feel his breath beginning to catch. They were staring. Judging. How did they even know?! They couldn't know! Only a handful of people knew, so how did these strangers find out?!

"Not here, not now!" his own voice screamed in his head. He could feel the chaos edging at his mind, threatening to take over. "Viktor! Help!"

"Hey, hey!" Viktor reached for Yuuri's hands, and successfully made Yuuri look at him, locking his calm eyes with the younger man's panic-filled ones. "You're safe, nobody will hurt you here."

Yuuri reached for his notebook and scribbled a very shaky note.

They're staring. Why are they staring?

"Who?" Viktor glanced around the room, only catching a single woman's eye as their gaze crossed paths.

Everyone.

"They're not." Viktor took a huge risk, but figured it would be worth it if it paid off, much like when he'd tackle-kissed Yuuri after his phenomenal performance. He gently placed his hand on the back of Yuuri's head, tipping it forward so their foreheads connected. "Just close your eyes, breathe. In two three, hold two three, out two three repeat." Yuuri followed Viktor's instructions, feeling their breath mingling as he slowly relaxed. Their thoughts seemed to connect as he leaned closer to Viktor, taking comfort in his warmth. Once his breathing had returned to normal, Yuuri moved his head to the side, leaning into Viktor's shoulder and wrapping his arms around the other man. He tried to keep his fears of what other people were thinking at the back of his mind. He didn't care. Or so he tried to convince himself. It wasn't completely true, but he found it easier to convince himself he didn't care when Viktor's arms snaked their way around his waist.

"I love you." Viktor whispered. He found himself feeling the need to say it more often. He was fine with that. Yuuri was fine with that.

"Katsuki?" A nurse called into the waiting room after about five minutes of the skaters' cuddle fest.

Yuuri and Viktor rose together, hands tightly intertwined.

"Doctor Tanaka will be in to see you in a few moments." The nurse smiled as Viktor helped Yuuri to hop up on the bed. The very uncomfortable bed. "Until then, feel free to browse the pamphlets."

"Thank you." Viktor nodded as he took a seat in the chair next to Yuuri's perch. The nurse left, closing the door of the small, sterile smelling room behind her.

Yuuri and Viktor let the minutes pass in a comfortable silence. Viktor didn't have anything to say, and even if he wanted to, Yuuri couldn't form the words.

"Hello, Mr. Katsuki. I'm Dr. Tanaka." a perky sounding woman opened the door, smiling brightly. "How are you doing today?"

Fine, thanks, and you? Yuuri wrote quickly, holding up the notepad for the doctor to see.

"I'm good, thank you for asking." Dr. Tanaka smiled, but Yuuri caught the moment of confusion that appeared on her face. "And you are?" Tanaka turned to Viktor.

"I'm Viktor Nikiforov, Yuuri's fiancé." Viktor smiled and shook the doctor's hand firmly.

"Well it's good to meet you both." Dr. Tanaka took a seat before the computer in the corner. "So, it says here you were assaulted in your home one week ago?" She read off the computer screen.

"Yes that's correct." Viktor confirmed. He and Yuuri had agreed upon Viktor answering all of the questions he definitely knew the responses to.

"And how exactly was the concussion obtained?"

One of the attackers rammed my head into the wall. Yuuri wrote out, trying not to remember it too much. he didn't need to break down yet again. Viktor was probably getting tired of it.

"Is that how you got the scab on your temple there?"

"Yes." Viktor nodded.

"Did you sustain any other injuries?"

"Two broken ribs on the right side, and multiple other minor bruises and cuts."

"Have you done anything that may have aggravated your concussion?"

I had a dizzy spell and fell yesterday. Hit my head on the way down.

"What were you doing before you fell?"

"Standing in the kitchen, getting a glass of water."

"May I ask what's keeping you from speaking, Mr. Katsuki?" Dr. Tanaka asked, seeming to be getting slightly irritated with the back and forth nature of the conversation. "Are you having trouble speaking or forming clear thoughts?"

No, my thoughts are perfectly clear most of the time. For some reason I just can't speak them out loud.

"That sometimes happens in the case of trauma victims, and it doesn't look like you have any physical complications at the moment, so that should pass in a matter of time."

"That's reassuring." Viktor smiled at Yuuri, happy that his previous statement had been proven true.

"You're a professional figure skater, correct?"

Yuuri nodded.

"Well because of your dizzy spell I can't clear you yet." Tanaka sighed. "I'd like you to come back in two weeks, write down any time you feel dizzy, have a headache, or any other complications such as distorted vision or irritation caused by light or sound. Take it easy for this week, try not to stress too much, do any vigorous activity and limit your electronic usage."

Yuuri nodded again.

"Alright, you guys are done for today, I'll see you in two weeks and hopefully clear you then too." Tanaka smiled and stood to open the door for her patient.

"Thank you." Viktor nodded to Tanaka and followed closely behind Yuuri as he went out the door. Before they could begin down the hallway, however, Viktor remembered something he was going to ask.

"Dr. Tanaka!" He whirled around and caught her attention before she disappeared around a corner. "Yuuri hasn't been able to eat since he was concussed. All he's been able to stomach is liquid so he's been eating nothing but soup and smoothies for the past few days. Is nausea supposed to last that long?"

"You've been nauseous all week?" Dr. Tanaka went to make a note as Yuuri scrambled for his pen. "That could be cause for concern…"

No! No, it's not nausea! Yuuri frantically scribbled.

"No? Then what is it?" Tanaka looked genuinely confused.

Nothing physical. Yuuri assured. I'll tell you later. He handed the second part only to Viktor.

"Well if you're sure, I'll see you in a couple of weeks." Dr. Tanaka left reluctantly, and Viktor steered Yuuri the other way, toward the waiting area.

"We were told to book another appointment in two weeks with Dr. Tanaka." Viktor spoke to the receptionist while Yuuri stared at his shoes, hating that Viktor had brought his eating difficulties up with the doctor. The intent was good, but the outcome would be Yuuri giving more information out that would turn Viktor even further away from him. Yuuri wasn't sure if Viktor realised just how disgusting he was, and he certainly hadn't wanted to digress that information, but now he'd said he would. And he wished he hadn't.

The car ride home was silent. Viktor didn't even call to see if Yurio, Otabek, and Phichit were still at the rink. When they got home, Viktor and Yuuri plopped onto the couch in the quiet house, Makkachin jumping up next to them.

"Spill." Viktor demanded in a somehow gentle tone. "If it's not nausea what is it?"

Yuuri sighed and pulled up a fresh sheet of paper, carefully planning out his confession.

Their tongues were in my mouth. Every time something solid passes my lips, I feel so disgusting I end up gagging. I can't even stand to brush my teeth. This whole week I've just been using mouth wash.

"Yuuri…" Viktor opened his arms and gathered Yuuri in them tightly, wanting to never let go. "You are not disgusting. You are perfect. You've done nothing wrong. It's those men who are the disgusting ones."

Yuuri positioned his legs across Viktor's lap so he could rest sideways against the older man's chest, feeling tears burning behind his eyes. But if they're disgusting doesn't that make me dirty by default? They really didn't leave any part of me untouched. They tainted me with their filth.

"No." Viktor hugged Yuuri tighter. "They could never taint you. You're too pure for that."

Still.

"Would you feel better if you had a bath?" Viktor suggested. "You haven't had one since you came home have you?"

Yeah, I could go for a shower.

"No. You're having a bath." Viktor held Yuuri at the shoulders, looking into his somewhat watery eyes. "If you can't stand at the counter you're not standing on slippery tiles."

Fine. Yuuri gave in. A bath wouldn't be so bad.

"I'll go draw it for you; Makka, protect Yuuri!"