After breakfast and a game of cards that had evoked a laugh he wished he could hold onto forever she seemed a bit more settled. Which, was why he was reluctant to break that good mood with a question. "I was thinking we could go into town. Get you some of the things you need." He watched her go on alert, the tense set of her shoulders and the way her eyes shot to the door. "You don't have to Ziva. I can go for you."

Ziva straightened her shoulders and shook her head. "No I will go."

"There's a bigger town a bit further out about an hour's drive, there's a mall there which means only one stop. We can get you a phone, clothes and anything else you might need, if you're up to it?" He knew she likely wasn't but he knew it wasn't likely she'd want anyone in town to see her.

Ziva stared at the bedroom door. "That would probably be for the best."

Just under two hours later Gibbs pulled into the mall's parking lot, Ziva still slept in the passenger seat as she had most of the drive. He was reluctant to wake her. As he reached to nudge her gently his phone rang. With a sigh he answered. "Gibbs."

Abby tried to let her smile push through as she answered Gibbs' greeting. "Hey, I was just checking in."

Gibbs smiled despite himself. "Hey Abbs, how you doing?"

After a long pull on her caf-pow Abby finally answered. "Worried."

"I know, but she's doing ok. She just needs time. She wants to see all of you. But she's tired and worn out."

"We don't care…" Abby heard him sigh, could picture him running his fingers through his hair.

"She does. She needs to be stronger before she's ready to see anyone. As soon as she tells me it's ok I'll let you see her. for now though I'm giving her space. I will tell you I brought her to Stillwater." He hadn't told Tony that, knowing there was the chance he'd ignore Gibbs' warning and visit before Ziva was ready.

"Really?"

"It's good for her here." Hoping it wasn't a mistake he added. "For both of us, I don't think it will be long before she asks to see you. She just needs to adjust." He felt Ziva move next to him her eyes meeting his as she stared at his phone. She didn't ask for it so he said nothing to Abby.

"Ok, just as long as she's ok." Abby recognized how much he'd shared but decided to ask about it later. Everyone knew that part of the reason Ziva had been found was because Gibbs had decided once he knew she was alive there was no way she would die in the hellhole she'd been trapped in.

"She is and when she's up for it I'll let you know." He took a minute to say goodbye and finally hung up. "It's ok Ziva don't rush to please them."

"It feels unfair. One moment I am ready to see them and the next I am not." Staring into the flip down mirror she was grateful for the sunglasses Gibbs had grabbed her at a gas station on the way there. Between the glasses, a long sleeved shirt and keeping her hair loose the worst of the bruises and cuts were covered.

"When you're ready Ziva and not before." Gibbs stepped out of the vehicle and walked around to open her door. She stepped out and he watched the intense alertness settle over her. The hyper vigilance he'd expected was there like a heavy coat. Carefully he took her hand giving it the softest squeeze before letting it go.

ZGZGZGZG

She had things now; the comfort of clothing, a cell phone and personal care items. Everything she would need to feel comfortable. Yet despite all the care Gibbs had taken to make sure her every need was met, she felt lost. Still felt the rough edge of being broken. She both craved being alone and hated it. Everything made her afraid. The strangers in the mall, the ring of the phone at Jackson's home and even more the very careful way Gibbs watched her.

He was entitled. She knew she was fragile not anything close to the woman she had been yet the way he watched her was enough of a reminder that she was afraid that the woman she had been would never return. She took a deep breath and applied the makeup Gibbs had hesitated to buy. Before he'd provided her with lipgloss and mascara this time she'd chosen her makeup specifically. He hadn't wanted to, had reminded her in his own gentle way that she didn't need it but had purchased it anyway.

As she finished the last brush of powder she felt just a bit less vulnerable. The bruises on her face at least were hidden and she could look in the mirror without the horror of the last few months showing. She'd balked at the amount of money he'd spent on her but he'd refused to be dissuaded. She might have continued to protest but she didn't have a lot of options so until she could change things she accepted what she otherwise would have fought.

Lunch had been another matter entirely. Eating was difficult. Her stomach didn't enjoy a great amount of food and the reminder of being drugged wasn't far behind her either. Somehow he knew and didn't comment or harass her when she couldn't finish the meal he'd ordered for her.

Sighing deeply she took a step back from the sink in his father's house and stared at the phone he'd given her. She owed it to the rest of the team to call them. At the very least to check in with them, but the cold sweat that broke out on the back of her neck was enough to stop her. She wasn't ready and after everything it made her feel lower than the rats that had frequented her underground holding place.

"Ziva?"

She turned to the door steeling herself against the flood of emotions that threatened. "I am ok. Just finishing up." He made a sound of agreement and she straightened her stuff on the counter before stepping out of the bathroom. As expected he was waiting for her. Sitting on the edge of the bed he was trying to look calm and collected as much as she was, but the worry was heavy in his eyes and posture.

"I am alright really. It feels good to do the normal things I used to do." He pulled her close, gently but close enough that he could very carefully touch her face. She fought the flinch this time successfully.

"You don't need this." Gibbs could easily see the great pains she'd taken to cover the bruises and fatigue on her face.

"I did it for me. I feel better this way." He nodded and pressed a kiss to her still healing knuckles.

"Dad's ready for you to help him with dinner if you're still up for it." He'd almost avoided telling her. She should be resting especially after all the walking they'd done earlier that day but he knew she needed to be doing more than nothing.

"I am looking forward to it." She almost stepped away instead she pressed a tentative kiss to his brow. "If I was not up to it I would choose to rest instead. You have shown me that I can trust you to let me make my choices. Because of that I will not push too hard. Or at the very least I will try not to." She felt the faintest clench of his fingers on her waist. It telegraphed an emotion neither of them was ready to voice.

"I know you're afraid Ziva and I know that won't go away anytime soon. But if I could take it from you I would." He met her eyes with difficulty knowing what she would see there.

Stroking the rough stubble on his jaw Ziva bit back tears. "I am, of everything and I am not used to that. But above all else I am worried I will never be the woman I was. At the least not as strong as I used to be. But this, being here, doing just the little things helps. You are helping." She heard the clanging of pots and pans in the kitchen along with the faint hint of a curse and couldn't fight the smile.

Gibbs felt the squeeze of her hands against his before she pulled from his arms and made her way to the kitchen. He felt the heavy wash of fatigue and sadness nearly overtake him as his hands fell into his hands. He felt impotent, despite her assurance that he was helping her. Violence threatened at the edges of his mind, begging him to take out his own hurt and frustration on something anything to alleviate the anger towards a man that was already dead. But he knew that wasn't the truth. His anger wasn't focused on one man or even just the group of men that had held her it was in fact now focused on a man whose main priority should have been his only remaining child.

Hatred pulsed through Gibbs veins in such force that he wasn't entirely sure it would be safe if he ever saw the man again. Ziva had meant something to him for a long time. Never acting on it had been an act of self-protection. Since Shannon every relationship had been an attempt to regain something he'd lost. Then when he'd known it wouldn't work the rest had been a means to an end, fulfilling a need.

Ziva had been something else entirely. He'd known from the moment he'd seen her that the feelings he had for her were too much. Those emotions could bring them both nothing but trouble and heartache so he'd pushed them aside to save them both. Now he was wondering if he'd chosen instead to face them if he could have saved her the horrors of a nightmare in the desert.

He'd almost lost himself in his thoughts when his phone rang. It took longer than normal to answer especially when he recognized Vance calling. "Gibbs."

"Hey."

Gibbs pushed a hand through his hair before forcing out something that resembled a greeting.

"How is she?"

"Tired, healing, not ready to see anyone."

Vance recognized that Gibbs' words were final, a hammer thrown down through the phone lines. "Of course. And how are you?"

Gibbs pulled the phone away stared at it in surprise before recognizing he shouldn't have been Vance always knew more then he let on. He should have lied instead he told the truth if nothing else because he'd been so honest regarding Ziva. "Managing."

"Eli knows." Vance heard the sharp indrawn breath but didn't comment. "Not exactly something we could have kept quiet. He called and I verified that she was alive."

Gibbs stared at the ceiling trying to calm the anger that beat like a drum. "Ziva wanted me to tell you to not allow anything that happened affect your professional relationship with Eli." Silence reigned and Gibbs could guess at the how Vance was reacting. Shrewd in business and political dealing Vance was above all else a good man.

Vance worked hard to clear his throat and hide any emotion he might be feeling. "I gave him no other details. I informed him if he had any other questions he should contact Ziva."

Gibbs gave a bitter laugh. "He can try." Even as he spoke he knew it wouldn't be incredibly difficult for Eli to find her, time consuming perhaps but not difficult. "Thank you for letting me know."

"Of course. If you need anything let me know and I'll do what I can and when she's ready Jackie would like to see her."

"It may be a while." Gibbs finished the phone call and heard Ziva's voice calling his name. She would need to know that she was back on her father's radar but it could wait at least until after dinner.

Ziva watched as the men cleared the table waiting for Gibbs to say whatever had kept him quiet most of the meal. "Jethro talk to me, tell me what you know."

Jackson stilled as he set placed dishes in the dishwasher rack. Ziva's words had his son freezing in place and the same veil of pain was cast upon both their faces.

Gibbs stared at his hands as the water from the faucet ran over them. "Eli called Vance he knows you're alive. It's possible he's looking for you."

Ziva felt more the pain on Gibbs face then her own. He worked methodically rinsing the dishes but his eyes focused somewhere else. "We knew this would happen. I am not surprised. He will find me eventually. "

Gibbs hated the calmness in her voice the lack of fear this time almost angered him. She deserved to be angry, filled with rage or hurt anything but the very real calm she displayed. "He can't hurt you anymore Ziva. You know that."

Ziva stood and took her place beside him. "He can Gibbs which is why you are so angry but I will not let him. I see him for what he is now. He will not ever change, his agenda is all about whatever he needs politically and personally I will not be a part of his games any longer. But I think we should leave here. I do not like the idea of putting your father in the middle of all this."

Jackson gave a rough snort. "That's crap you don't need to go anywhere. I've dealt with men like him. Consider this your home Ziva you aren't leaving until you choose to, not out of some need to protect me."

Ziva looked at him a long time before nodding. Turning to Gibbs she took his damp hands in her own. "If I am staying then I think it is likely time for you to call them." She didn't have to clarify who or why. He simply nodded. "I am going to get a shower and head for bed early."

Gibbs pulled her in for a hug and the briefest kiss and then watched as she made her way out of the kitchen. Unable to hold back he cursed and felt the glass in his hand crack. It wasn't until blood seeped from his fingers that he could breathe again. "He won't try to kill her. Simply drag her back into the hell he created for her."

Jackson pulled out the first aid kit and finished the dishes while his son bandaged the small cut on his hand. "That woman in there is strong Jethro, no doubt about it. She feels weak right now and you know what that's ok because she has you and her team and hell even me. We aren't going to let that man have any part of her. If he finds her fine but he isn't taking her anywhere she doesn't want to go."

Gibbs felt a surge of pride at his father's words. A man who'd been through his own hell and still he stood ready to help a woman he barely knew all because his son cared for her. "I know I said it already dad but there aren't the right words…"

Jackson might have brushed his son's words off but he heard the emotion there and chose instead to acknowledge them. "I'm your father, whatever we've been through, that doesn't go away. No need for thanks."

Gibbs smiled clasping his dad on the shoulder before walking into the living room to call Tony.

Tony grabbed his phone on the third ring trying not to sound winded as he set the weights down. "Hey boss."

"Tony you got a minute?"

"Of course." Tony rubbed a towel across the back of his neck as he sat in a chair in his home gym. Gibbs didn't usually call him by his first name and his voice was quiet. All of it gave Tony pause as he settled in to listen.

"Ziva's ready to see all of you. But she's still having a hard time adjusting so you'll need to be, careful with her." Gibbs felt almost like he was betraying her. He knew most of what had happened in the dingy room where Ziva had been found but still he wondered. More than that Ziva had suffered enough to have her emotions further laid bare by him seemed more than unfair.

"I get it." Brief words but he knew from the way Gibbs sighed they were understood. As one of the men who'd walked through hell to save her he could have been hurt by the way she'd kept herself from him instead he chose to understand. She had barely spoken on the flight home and then disappeared with Gibbs. Whatever it took to make her feel safe he could live with. "Where are you." There was a long silence.

"Are you at home or in public?"

Tony actually stared at his phone for a long moment before answering "At home. But I have a disposable I can call you back on if you want?"

Gibbs ran a hand through his hair. "Do that." He hung up and waited until his phone rang again." It was highly unlikely Eli'd had enough time or ability to tap there phones or that it would do any good with Tony calling his personal cell but it was worth the effort. When his phone rang he answered.

Tony spoke quickly like ripping off a band-aid. "Eli knows she's not dead?"

"Yeah, which means be cautious. I brought her home to Stillwater." He could almost laugh at the sound of surprise Tony made. "I know it's late but I'll need you to go to my place and grab some things, and then call everyone. There's a few things I'll need from Abby and McGee as well."

"Not a problem." He doubted McGee and Abby were doing much of anything more than he was, killing time until they could see Ziva. "We'll be there tomorrow." Then he listened as Gibbs listed off what he would need. He barely blinked at the specific list, instead taking in the things Gibbs requested and forming a plan that he hoped would never be needed.