Definitely not the strong start, or finish, that she had been hoping for. But Regina stayed put, standing there, in front of her, holding her hand ever so gently, afraid she might break, "You can tell me anything," she said softly, the concern evident in her voice.
Emma couldn't help but pull away from her companion, her support in this mission, she steeled her nerves once again, barely able to prepare herself for this. She couldn't believe she was about to say this, but here it was, she had gone too far to turn back now. One last deep breath, a bit more mental coaching, trying to convince her she could do this, that Regina wouldn't act negatively, wouldn't throw her away, cast off to the side like yesterday's garbage.
"I really, really, kinda like you, as more than a friend and I've been trying to hide it and forget how I feel but I really can't and I think I might even love you," it all fell out at once, in one breath, each word connected, hanging onto the last as though it was being cast off a cliff. They all ran together, a sort of verbal diarrhea that assaulted Regina's ears, and it was over. But it wasn't, Emma had yet to take a breath, she couldn't believe she'd admitted that much, she really had just wanted to stop after the first sentency-bit, but the rest kind of fell out with it, and then she forgot how to breath.
Regina couldn't help but laugh at Emma's current embarrassment, the present situation she was in, she had imagined something much worse, more along the lines of 'I killed your puppy', not 'I have a crush on you', not to mention the way Emma had really dealt with all of this, it reminded her of high school. And the lovesick teenager that had just professed her feelings, was still standing in front of her, waiting, for some reaction other than laughter, hurt clearly displayed on her features.
"Is that all?" She managed to gasp out between bouts of laughter, "I thought you were going to say something much worse."
Emma stood perfectly still, looking down at the sidewalk, a blush creeping across her pale features, she didn't know how to respond, what to say, or do, or if she should just turn and run, but no matter what she willed, she couldn't force her body to actually react to anything.
She felt soft hands on her cheeks, forcing her head to raise, Regina's deep chocolate gaze holding hers, brown meeting green, eyes searching for answers, for questions, for clues, for one another. Tears bristled, threatening to spill, she wanted to look away but was unable to. Regina smiled at her, "You know, I've heard much worse in my time, a crush is nothing to be embarrassed about, we can't control who we are attracted to. But to be perfectly honest, you're not exactly the best at hiding your attraction, it was obvious the moment you chose to speak to me. And if I may, I'd also like to say, I'm very flattered that someone such as yourself would be interested in someone like me."
Emma felt a small smile work its way across her face as those tears finally fell, this time out of joy rather than sadness. She really hadn't wanted to cry, and had fought it as best she could, tears made her look weak, tears made her feel weak, and Emma Swan was not weak. Tender thumbs worked their way across her cheeks, wiping away the salty water that streaked its way down, strong arms pulled her into an embrace, tight, holding her, unwavering, she was enveloped in warmth and comfort. She could smell the spicy sweet shampoo of the other woman, feel her muscles working beneath her shirt, sending a silent threat that she better not try and pull away, that this was just as much for her own comfort as it was for Regina's, they both needed this right now.
Moments passed turning into seconds, seconds into minutes before finally, Regina's grip eased up and she let go. "You're not gonna disappear on me now are you?" She asked unsurely, leaving Emma to wonder, what had happened in her past.
"No, of course not, I'd never." Emma felt like it was her turn to offer comfort now, when it had been her just a moment before thinking Regina would be the one to leave. Emma knew deep down, she'd do whatever it would take to be there for Regina, no matter what would happen, she'd stay, even if she could never be more than a friend.
It was clear, the moment was over, Regina took a step back, distancing herself from Emma, "So, is there anything I could help you with while you're here?"
"I'm not sure, my boss sent me to find this guy, and I've gotta check him out, make sure he not only could fit the role needed but is the type of person we want. So far, all I know is he's attractive or would be to a large number of our viewers, and that's important. But the boss didn't really know much about him or if he'd even fill the right role."
They continued on down the street in easy conversation, Regina asking questions of Emma, and Emma answering as best she could, trying to keep her answers simple, where she could remember the details. This was risky territory for her, but she felt that she could trust the older woman. Though she was still unsure as to how much, simply for the fact that if Regina found out the truth, she was sure she'd be committed. But she enjoyed their relaxed banter, being able to share her work with someone that wasn't thousands of miles away.
It wasn't that she couldn't talk to Ruby, she'd be there, she was always there, a truly good friend, but it wasn't the same, texting her instead of venting her frustrations in person. Emma swore she'd make it back home and spend some time with Ruby, she'd tell her all about Regina, all about her travels, and share what she could about her crazy new job. She, deep down, really did miss seeing Ruby, and the simple life that was staying at home, it had only been a week or so since she'd left home, but it had been a very busy week.
Emma realized in that week that she'd known Regina, she really actually knew almost nothing about her still. Yes, she was supposedly an accountant, but Emma still swore up and down that she had seen her on TV, and Regina did a lot of travelling for an accountant. Not to mention she remembered that first meeting, hearing her talk about Will, it could have just been a coincidence, but that was too much of one for her. She couldn't help but start to be suspicious of the other woman as time passed, she was giving out so much information about herself while finding out practically nothing about Regina.
Emma moved the conversation slowly away from her, redirecting it towards Regina, trying to find out what bit of information she could about the brunette, wondering if there was an ulterior motive to their constant meetings. She knew this couldn't just be fate or a fluke. And soon enough, she found Regina inviting her over to dinner, to see Henry again, to meet her family (really just Daniel at this point). They had been walking for a while, and the sun had slowly begun to set, reds and oranges streaking across the sky, a bolt of yellow the only hint that the sun had been there moments before.
Regina led them up to a car, sat alone in the parking lot, she pulled out her keys, clicking the remote, the lights flashed once as the doors unlocked. It was a sleek black Mercedes, which Emma had to admit, fit Regina rather well, a sporty sedan, practical but alluring, much as the woman who stood in front of her. "I would prefer we not walk to my home, it would take us much too long to get there."
A distance grew between the two as they had to part around the car, Emma realized just how much she had gotten used to the company and comfort the woman offered her just by being there. The gap between them was not large, but it echoed in Emma's chest, a breeze now present at her side. She slipped into the passenger seat while Regina entered on the driver's side, pressing a button on the dashboard, letting the car roar to life.
Emma couldn't help but watch the scenery pass by them as the city came to life in a flash of colors, bright lights reflecting off the sleek metal and glass surfaces that seemed to be everywhere, signs danced, advertising different restaurants, businesses, and attractions. The buildings slowly disappeared, distance growing between each, Emma realized they were now outside the city center, it had been a long silent car ride thus far, and she wasn't one to break the silence, but couldn't help but wonder where exactly Regina was taking her.
As if reading her mind, Regina spoke softly, "It's not too much further. I didn't want to raise my family in the city, it's too busy, too much congestion. I like hearing the sounds of the country at night."
Only another couple of minutes passed before they pulled up to a large, fenced in house, the wrought iron horse gate laying open across the driveway. It was a farm they had driven up to, the dusty road leaving specks of dirt and mud along the side of the Mercedes. Gravel crunching under the tires as they continued up the distance to the house, a circle drive out front, the large and imposing farm house glowed with a soft light from inside. Emma could feel the love radiating its way outside, and she couldn't help but feel guilty, this was a happy family that she was intruding upon, one that she would just add friction to. She had no place to be here and suddenly wanted to turn and run, a feeling that she hadn't had in years, but she knew she was going to ruin this family if she stayed.
It was too late now, the car had stopped, Regina sat there, looking at her expectantly. She couldn't just leave now, not to mention she was so far outside of town she'd probably die, or be eaten by some desert creature before finding another soul out here. She braced herself, placing her hand on the door handle, she gently tugged, feeling it give almost instantly, and pushed the door open, reassuring herself that she could do this, that she didn't have to ruin anything, she could survive a family dinner and not destroy a family. God, a family dinner, she hadn't had one of those in years, it had just been her and Ingrid, just the two of them for years, not some big affair, not like this.
She stood there, frozen for a good minute in the driveway, a reassuring hand on her shoulder, she realized Regina was standing there next to her, waiting, comforting, she was her support. A friendly smile and a light touch could do so much for her, especially when coming from this one woman. She took a step forward, towards the door, questioning why this was so hard for her anyways.