#####OQ#####

He awoke to someone knocking on the door, and he forced himself to rise and don a robe. His throbbing, unhappy knee made him hop his way to the door.

Shifting his weight, he opened the door to a two submissive dark clad women, one who carried in food and drink, who then sat the tray on the table, and another that dropped a small pile of clothes, no doubt for Felicity, into a chair. One of the women handed him a small glass jar with a lid and pointed to his knee then both women, heads down, quietly quit the room.

Placing a finger to his lips,he shook his head, while Felicity cocked her head at him and eyed him strangely. Carefully, he searched each dish and then ran his hands around the table's edge and came up with a small electrical bugging device that he slammed against the table, destroying it.

"Was that?"

He raised a finger stopping her speech and then removed the food from the tray, and turned it over to reveal another small device. He crushed it too. Quickly, he checked the clothes and found nothing.

"Seems all clear now." He grabbed the small glass jar and hopped back to the bed.

Felicity said, "Wow, they're bugging us?"

"I've cleared the room several times, so I figured they'd try something. Ra's wants to know what I tell you."

"So he can use it against you, I'm sure."

"Probably, now let's put some on this on your face."

"I think your knee needs it more."

"No, you first. Ra's said it was for your eye too." He gave her his best smile. "Please, let me take of you for once."

"Okay," she said quietly, as she smiled back and lifted her head up for him.

Carefully he applied the salve to the now spreading dark purple ring around her eye. He breathed out trying to push the feelings of helplessness away, trying, to fighting the hate that made him want to clench his fists.

"Stop it, Oliver."

"What?"

"You know what! Stop beating yourself up over this. I know you'd have never wanted him to touch me, that you hate this. "

"You know me well." He leaned in and gently kissed her, tasting her.

"And what's a black eye when I get to spend all this time with you?" She smiled at him.

"That's not funny. I . . ." And she pulled his mouth back to hers and gave him a seriously hot kiss, effectively silencing him.

But she ended the kiss way too soon pulling away.

"Let me look at your knee. Lay down" She ordered as she climbed out of the bed, found his undershirt and pulled it over her head. Barefoot, she began dragging pillows from the many on the bed to prop his leg up. She then pushed him down on the bed.

Hard.

Her words were also hard, as she inspected the damage. "Is the fool trying to cripple you? It's a good thing you're not trying to be the Arrow right now for you'd never get the pants on." She started carefully applying the salve to his blown out knee, and he had to close his eyes to take the pain.

"So I take it my knee's swelled?" He sucked in his breath as the salve burnt like fire.

"Like a balloon, and I bet there isn't a piece of ice in hundreds of miles, huh?Her face hard, she looked like she wanted to explode.

"Probably not. But, you look really sexy in my shirt." He reached for her, but she pushed his hands away.

"Well, do you think they've poisoned the food?"

Oliver laughed then said, "Probably not. Ra's doesn't seem to want me dead, just obedient."

"Well, I'm starving. You?"

"I could eat."

"Okay, but keep the leg propped up, and I'll bring it to you."

They ate, talked about home and friends, and Thea's recovery. They slept little, showered and made love repeatedly. Time flew away and before they knew it, the sun started to brighten the sky on the third day. Their time almost over they lay together in the predawn, in the afterglow of the sweetest lovemaking, he thought he'd ever experienced in his life, but he had to say goodbye this time.

"Felicity, I love you," he said the words, as he stroked her hair, trying to memorize her touch, her scent, the texture of her skin, everything he would torture himself with later.

He'd never been one for cuddling, but he'd barely released her in the two plus days they'd had together. However, their time almost over, he knew what he had to do. As he'd told Barry all those weeks ago, he had to let her go. It was the only way to keep her safe from Ra's.

Calmly, even though, his heart was collapsing inside his chest, he placed his chin on the top of her head. He couldn't look at her face, or he'd never get the words out.

"I will never allow him to hurt you again, Felicity. I swear it. I'll do whatever it takes to keep you safe."

"You know how I feel about that. I just want to be with you." She was drifting sleepily away, and he wished he could just get up and sneak away, but he couldn't do that, not to her.

"Shh... hear me out. I want you to prepare yourself, Felicity. Oliver Queen'll be dead the next time you see me."

She wasn't asleep now, her eye snapped open and she said harshly, "No, you can hold on to him."

"Ra's is taking you away too. When he said say your final goodbyes, he meant it."

He cleared his throat to push past the pain in his chest. "And'll do whatever has to be done to keep you out of this mess. Never and I mean never, will I watch him strike you again because of my mistakes."

"It's worth it, Oliver. You're worth it."

"No, he'll REALLY hurt you next time. Nothing's worth that, not to me." His voice harsh now, as he struggled to make her understand. "Think of what happens to me if you fall on his sword. If I find you like . . Thea? I can't do it."

"But it."

"No!" He interrupted her harshly, "Don't say it couldn't happen. Ra's would do it and make me watch. Do you want that for me, to know I killed you?"

She was crying now, but he drove the point home. "So you must be ready, my strong, brave Felicity, if you see me again, and that is an IF, I will not acknowledge you, know you or speak to you. I'll be Al Sah-Him and trust me, he's not the man you love."

She made to rise but he held her against him, as she protested, "You can't be serious. There has to be a way to end this, to fix this, and to bring you home to me. Together, all of us, your team will work this out."

"If there is a way, I can't find it. At least for right now, I have to do exactly what he demands of me. The league's too big, too far reaching. If I want to keep my family safe, there's no escape for me, this is my destiny, and I have to come to terms with it and you do too. Now I want you to promise me that you won't wait for me, and that you will stop whatever you are doing to free me from the league."

"I never said I was doing anything."

He heard the guilt in her voice. "You're a bad liar. And I expect nothing less from you but to try to save me, but you have to stop. You, the team, have to let me go, have to try to go on with your lives, and have to try to be happy. Promise me?"

She pulled away from him , looked him straight in the eyes and said violently, "No, I can't, and I won't give up. I don't believe this is what happens to the rest of our lives, that we're destined to be alone."

"You're not. You can still find someone. Have a life."

"I swear I'm going to punch you in the eye. Listen to me. We deserve our love. You deserve love. And I love you." She jabbed him in the chest with her pink painted fingernail. "I love you, the man, not Oliver, not the Arrow, and not Al Sah-Him. I love the MAN, and I don't care what you call yourself. I believe our love will somehow set you free to return to me, and I won't just stop believing it because some mad man demands it."

Tears ran down her face, and he engulfed her in his arms and rocked her, as the sun broke a new day. Gently, he used his thumps to wipe the tears from her face, taking great care around her purple with yellow edges, black eye.

Kissing her carefully, he breathed her scent in one last time and got up. She looked up then turned her back on him in the bed, and even though, he knew she still cried, he turned his back on her and on Oliver Queen.

Swiftly, he dressed in silence and left the room. Walking away from the woman he loved with all his heart, without looking back was heart wrenching and set his gut on fire. He stopped in the hall, for just one instant and rub his hands across his face, and then he steeled himself and walked away.

######OQ######

Ra's was breaking his fast and invited him to join him. He sat but ate little having a problem swallowing food past the lump in his throat.

"It is done then?" Ra's asked, staring into his eyes.

He did not even pretend he didn't understand. "It is over. Oliver Queen is dead."

"Yes, Oliver Queen is alive only in the past. I knew you would come to your senses. I will send her home this morning. But understand one of the league will always be close to her."

"Use them to insure her safety, and we will have no more problems."

"We have an understanding then?"

"Yes, now who would you like me to kill today? I'm ready to get to it."

"That's the spirit, my son."

He trained hard that day, and he killed simply because Ra's told him to kill. His defiance gone, and Ra's rewarded him by keeping him off his knees. He welcomed the fight, the combat and even the pain when he misjudged and took a sword cut on his forearm. He didn't flinch as a quiet woman stitched the wound with small painful stitches.

When she finished stitching, he rose to take his leave but Ra's stopped him when he said, "Al Sah-Him, sit have a drink with me."

The two sat by the fire and even though the drink was bitter, he sipped it down. Ra's turned to him. "You must cut the woman from your heart. She is the reason you were slow today, your thoughts of her will get you killed."

If he thought the hate within him was strong before, it crushed him now. "I've given her up, now I ask to retire."

"As you wish. Sleep well my son."

Returning to his chambers, he stripped the bed in a round of fury to remove the smell of her and threw the bedding in the corner. He would sleep on the floor from now on, he had decided. She was the one who'd bought him a cot and coached him back into sleeping in a bed, and he would return to his old ways from the island.

Entering the bathroom, he had to grasp the door frame to stop from falling when he saw the mirror. Slowly, he still slid to his knees, as pain engulfed him.

She had left him a message on the mirror in bright red lipstick. Felicity had drawn two connected hearts. One said "me" and the other one "you," and she had printed the words "forever I'm still with you. I'll wait as long as it takes."

He couldn't breathe as his eyes followed the arrow she had drawn to the counter top and there in a perfect circle laid her red ponytail holder, the same one that he had removed from her hair just yesterday just before they had made such wonderful love.

She'd laughed, as he'd pulled her hair down and told him not to lose the only ponytail holder she had with her, and then the things she had done to him had taken all his control away. His cock twitched even now at the thought of her.

Carefully, he picked up the small red band and rubbed it between his fingers. Instantly, he felt connected to her. It reminded him of his green hood that he'd worn to honor Yao Fei. Just touching the band, he could almost feel her presence, her strength beside him. His Felicity was so smart, she knew he would keep it as a talisman, and that it would weaken his resolve to forget her.

This was a mistake and he should smash the mirror and throw the red band from the balcony and rid himself of it and the memory. He shut his eyes and breathed out. Oliver Queen is dead, only a memory, he told himself and his hand trembled. But instead of doing what he needed to do, he placed the small band in his pocket and patted it for safety. Then very carefully he removed all the signs of her lipstick message so that Ra's would never know.

After a quick shower, he decided to remake the bed. He was so exhausted, not only physically but both mentally and emotionally, and he knew she would not want him to sleep on the floor. She would not want him to punish himself.

No, he would heal, and he would train harder than he ever had. She was right as she always was, there had to be a way out of this. Carefully, he tended his knee and then he crawled in a bed that smelled like her, propped his knee up and slept the sleep of the dead.

######OQ######

Felicity was glad to be back in Starling City. The man who returned her to in front her house never said a word, as he stopped the car and jerked his head in a motion that clearly meant "get out." Gladly, she climbed out and he sped away.

John Diggle came out of the shadows in just seconds calling her name, concern filling his voice. "You okay? I've looked everywhere for you. We all have. Where have you been the last couple of days? I was worried sick. We all were."

She ran to him, and he held her close in a bear hug.

John pulled her back to look in her face, frowning deeply, he demanded, "Who hit you? Tell me, Felicity? Was it the league?"

"I want you to help me buy a gun and to learn to shoot, John."

"No way. You're just upset. Now tell me who did this."

"Darn right, I'm upset but I'm done crying, and the next time the league picks me up and throws me at his feet, I'm going to kill him."

"You're not making sense. Who? Felicity, you could never kill anyone."

"You're wrong because the next time I see Ra's Al Ghul, I am going to kill him for what he's doing to Oliver. He may be able to stop a knife and a sword, but I bet he can't stop a clip of diamond tipped bullets. And, John, I want an automatic."

######OQ######

Water splashed over him, jerking him from his dreamless sleep.

Ra's stood above him, a dark frown on his face. His brain foggy, he realized he was chained to the floor, and he should have known if he wasn't dreaming, Ra's had drugged him.

Ra's kicked him in his bad knee, then reached into his pocket and removed her ponytail holder, stealing it from him. "Wrong choice, Al Sah-Him. Oliver Queen is alive only in the past. He is forgotten."

A hood flung over his head, someone choked him until he passed out again.

#####OQ#####

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