BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! Rolling over violently Scarlett slapped the alarm next to her bed and sat up rubbing her eyes. Pausing for a moment she looked back over, when did she get an alarm clock? Her lips pursed together into a thin line, her sheets way softer then the itchy blue ones Beth had given her from the closet. Getting up she marched toward the door and across the hall to the garage.
"Rick? Rick!" She yelled pushing the door open.
"I'm going to work. Morty, good morning. Dad, good morning. I am going to work. Goodbye." Beth awkwardly got into her car and drove off.
"What's with Mom? Oh Good m-morning Scarlett." Before she could answer Rick cut her off, "Oh, what's with Mom? So, you're saying that she's acting weird? How soph –urrp- isticated. Careful, guys. You're gonna burn out the CPU with this one."
Cocking a brow she looked over at Morty, "Okay, you know what, Rick? You're acting weird, too."
"Whatever, quote-unquote Morty." He said being the absolute child he was. "Alright, well I'll see you after school." "Watch –" Before she could warn the kid he walked into the side of the garage, "Ow! Oof! Ugh! Damn it! I'm all right. I'm okay." He mumbled before venturing off.
"Rick what's going on?" She asked walking over to his work bench, a rat laid out on the table in front of him. "Oh you too, just great. Good j-job ass holes." Her nose scrunched, "Who the fuck are you talking too?" Getting up he started to walk outside the garage and she followed close behind him.
"I really don't have time to entertain you." He said waving her off. "Rude." She said looking down and wishing she wasn't in her pj shorts and tank top. "Can you stop walking for a damn second something weird is going on." He paused turning his body toward her, "Concentrated dark matter."
"Uh, okay. Are you having a seizer?" She asked honestly not understand what the hell was going on. She looked down when he wrapped his hand around her wrist and started pulling her down the street.
It wasn't long before they were at Morty's school. It had been a while since she had been back here. "Come on." He mumbled finally letting her go once they were outside a class room door, it was only a moment late that eh barged in. "Morty, u-uh, come on. There's a family emergency."
Scarlett was in no mood to get involved, "Stop right there! If he leaves, I'm giving him an F!" That voice, it almost sounded like a knock off version of Goldenfold. "He doesn't care." Rick said dragging the boy out of the class room. Scarlett gave him a small hesitant wave. "Aw, man! Rick, I have to go back! I think I was about to get married!"
The trio ended up in the locker room and Scarlett was hoping to finally get some answers. "Take a shower with me, Morty. You took Scarlett."
"What?!"
"No."
The two answered him at the same time. "Listen to me. Get your clothes off and get in the shower right now." She had to look away as he started taking him clothing off, "Y-y-y-you guys got to trust me." Nibbling her lip she knew that Rick usually knew what he was talking about, either that or he was having some weird stroke due to his age. "Ugh! I'm gonna get an F in class, Rick." Morty pulled his shirt over his head and Scarlett did the same. "Morty, that's not class. T-t-t-that wasn't your teacher. This isn't your school. This entire world is not the world. We're inside a huge simulation chamber on an alien spaceship."
"Wait a minute. W-what are you talking about?" Pinching the bridge of her nose she sighed, "Damn it I knew something was off this morning." She wiggled out of her shorts, nothing covering her but her underwear and bra. "It's all fake –urrp- Morty, all of it. Nanobotic renderings, a bunch of… crazy, fake nonsense. I couldn't say so until we got in the shower. They won't monitor us in here." The kid looked straight ahead trying to give her some dignity when she was finally nude. "Wait monitor us?! W-who?!" Looking around her covered up he privates "Zigerion scammers, Morty. The galaxy's most ambitious, least successful con artists. You know, it's lucky for us they're also really uncomfortable with nudity."
Scarlett made sure her body was turned in such a way that if they did look they could only really get a glimpse of her ass. This was rather annoying. "Aw, come on, Rick. If everyone's just gonna be insane today, at least let me be insane with Jessica."
"I can't let you do that, Morty." He said grabbing all of clothes into his hands and running outside down the street. "Give it to me Rick!" He yelled, all Scarlett could do was cover her chest and hope that this was a simulation. "No Morty come on!"
"Rick we can't run around naked all - ." Rick was quick to shove their things inside a sewer drain "day." Leaning her head back she looking to what was apparently the fake sky. "Uhp, uhp, uhp! Morty, keep your hands off your ding-dong! Scarlett, uncover the goods. It's the only way we can speak freely. Look around you, Morty. Do you really think this world is real? You'd have to be an idiot not to notice all the sloppy details. Look, that guy's putting a bun between two hot dogs."
"I don't know, Rick. I mean, I've seen people do that before." Snickering a bit she fell in line with the two, "Well this morning I had a random alarm clock in my room and the wrong set of sheets, sloppy if you ask me." Rick glanced over at her for a moment before pointing something else out.
"Well, look at that old lady. She's, she's walking a cat on a leash." That was a little strange, "Uh, Mrs. Spencer does that all the time, Rick."
"Look, I-I-I don't wanna hear about Mrs. Spencer, Morty! She's an idiot! Alright, alright, there. W-what about that, Morty?" They stopped in front of a giant toaster, a pop tart walking out of it with a brief case in its hand. "Okay, okay, you got me on that one." The pop tart got into a smaller toaster to drive off. "Oh, really, Morty? Are you sure you haven't seen that somewhere in real life before?" Rick was just being a sarcastic dick at this point.
"No, no. I haven't seen that. I mean, why would a Pop tart wanna live inside a toaster, Rick? I mean, that would be, like, the scariest place for them to live. You know what I mean?"
"You're missing the point, Morty. Why would he drive a smaller toaster with wheels? I mean, does your car look like a smaller version of your house? No."
"Maybe im having a stroke." She muttered putting a hand to her chest. That was the only thing that actually would have made any kind of sense right about now. "So, why are they doing this? W-what do they want?"
Sirens sounded as an ambulance stopped in front of them, the door swinging open. "We got the president of the United States in here! We need 10cc of concentrated dark matter, stat, or he'll die!" Rick was quick to slam the door in a naked huff. "Concentrated dark matter! They were asking about that in class."
"They are just not subtle at all are they?" Rick shook his head. "Concentrated dark matter, it's a special fuel I invented to travel through space faster than anybody else. These Zigerions are always trying to scam me out of my secrets, but they made a big mistake this time, Morty. They dragged you both into this. Now they're gonna pay!"
"Wait, what, w-w-what are we gonna do?" Walking toward their fake home to make a plan and then hopefully some clothes, "We'll scam the scammers. And we're gonna take them for everything they've got." Scarlett fist pumped at the idea, "and someone is getting slapped in the face." She added in. The two looking at her like she was the strange one.
Making there was back home they came up with a plan, well mostly Rick did and the other two agreed to follow. "Glad to have clothes back on." Scarlett mumbled and Morty nodded. Rick huffed before tossing a microphone at his grandson. "Aw, geez, Rick. I-I don't know if I like this plan, you know? I mean, crowds, t-t-t-they have a tendency to make me really nervous."
Scarlett slapped Morty on the back, he had nothing to worry about they were going to be fine. "Morty, relax. It's just a bunch of 1s and 0s out there. You're gonna be fine. Just follow my lead. Yo, DJ, drop that beat." Chuckling behind her hand as Rick pulled his grandsons pants down a little and gave him a hat.
"Uh-oh, Morty. This crowd looks too small for one of our famous rap concerts. I don't think we can perform our new song, "The Recipe for Concentrated Dark Matter," for a crowd this tiny."
More and more simulated people showed up and Rick and Morty handled them with ease, making them jump and twirl. They walked in circled and twirled their arms, it wasn't long till the system had to reboot. "Every one run!"
"Oh, man, Rick! W-w-w-where we running to?"
"Out of the simulation, Morty. Normally, the chamber operates like a treadmill, with the virtual world disappearing behind us and being rendered in front of us as we move through it, but while it's frozen, we can get to…the edge. Here we go."
Scarlett didn't hesitate to jump when they reached the end of the simulation. "Holy crap!" Morty yelled and when they touched down they followed Rick through doors and around to many corners.
"Keep your eyes peeled for the central processing room. That's how we're gonna scam these idiots." Scarlett nodded scanning everywhere she could.
"So, hey, why do these aliens keep coming after you, Rick, if you're so much smarter than them?" Her eyes shifted over to Rick wondering the same thing as Morty. "It's an obsession for them at this point—"
Scarlett couldn't help but let a small chuckle pass through her lips. "What's so funny?" He asked, eyes brow cocked slightly. Before she could answer his eyes lit up.
"Aha! Here we go. Grab as many processors as you can carry. These guys aren't good at much, but they're really good at making these chips." Nodding the two went to work grabbing as many chips as they could for Rick.
"Opps." Scarlett said dropping a few on the floor.
"Don't worry about it Scarlett. There's plenty of them ya goof." With a chuckle Rick tossed a few chips at her before Morty came to her rescue and tossed some back at his Grandpa. "Come on, quit it, Rick! Quit it!" He laughed shielding his face from more chips.
Scarlett couldn't help but let a chuckle pass her lips. The innocence of the moment one she was sure to keep guarded in her memories.
"We should go." She said not wanting over stay her welcome. Distracting the guards up ahead with some chips it wasn't long before the trio was safely aboard an escape pod.
"Wow. What do you know? Huh. That was easy." Morty was right it was easy for once.
"Totes malotes, dawg." Rick said leaning back in his chair, arms behind his head. Scarlett scrunched her nose taking in her surroundings.
"Kind of hard to believe it was so easy huh?" She asked gauging any reaction Rick or Morty might have.
It wasn't long before they arrived back to casa de smith. The three going into the garage, "I'm gonna be able to use these processors to make some real important science stuff." Leaning down to his safe Rick punched in his code. "Huh that's weird." He mumbled punching the code in again.
"Oh Shit." Scarlett mumbled the very world as they knew it shifting around them.
"Well, what's this? W-what could this possibly be? Because it looks like you're inside a simulation…inside a simulation. You're still on the ship. Game-day bucket go boom!" The pink big headed Zigerion looked like he had just won the lottery.
Scarlett huffed in annoyance, she was right; in her gut she knew that it was way too easy. She couldn't believe she didn't trust her gut.
"We've known how to make concentrated dark matter for a long time. But now we also know the code to your fabled safe, Rick Sanchez! All your most valuable secrets will now be ours!"
"Uh, yeah, until I get home before you and change the combination, you bunch of idiots!" Rick said with a burp.
"That is why you're never getting home. Get them!" Before any of the Zigerions could move toward them Rick pulled Morty's pants down, the Zigerions all covering their faces in horror at the site. "RUN Morty, Scarlett! L-let's go!"
They sprint around the corner and down the hall as fast as they could.
"Jerry!?"
"Dad?!"
The three of they yelled not knowing if this was part of the simulation or not. All of this was just messing with Scarlett's head.
"What are you doing here? W-why are you dressed like a waiter? Screw it. We don't have time. Come on." Ricked grabbed Jerry's despite his screaming and dragged him along. They were finally on another spaceship, hopefully the one to take them home.
"Shut your face Jerry!" Scarlett barked, not being able to take his whining any longer. "Man up, Jerry! I may need you to work the lasers." Rick said trying to get his stupid son in law to do something useful.
"Oh, man! They're hot on our tail, Rick!" Morty screamed.
"I guess they really do have concentrated dark matter." Rick mumbled trying his best to dodge the oncoming blasters.
"Well, you know how to make it, too, right, Rick?" As soon as the questions left Morty's mouth Scarlett's gut turned upside down.
"Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh, check the engine room. We just need cesium, Plutonic quarks, and bottled water."
Getting out of her chair she rushed over to Rick. " Maybe we should –"
"Whoa! It's all here, Rick!" Morty spoke over her, dread pooling in the center of her stomach. This wasn't right. "Wait, wait Rick—" Her pleas drowned out the sounds of more lasers making contact with the ship.
"Wow, Morty. Lucky break. Grab that bucket. Okay, two parts Plutonic quarks, one part cesium." Rick took a hard turn on the wheel. Scarlett bounce a bit but was able to regain her footing.
"Okay. Uh-huh. Alright." Morty mumbles.
"Now empty the water bottle into the bucket and pour it all into the fuel tank so we can get the hell out of here! What are you doing, Morty?! There's no time!" Rick yelled looking over at the boy.
"Fuck." Scarlett mumbled when she notice Morty starting to glitch.
"Oh, no." Rick mumbled. The space ship dissolving before their very eyes.
"Oh my god, Rick. How dumb are you? You're inside a simulation of a simulation…inside another giant simulation! W-we never had the recipe for concentrated dark matter. But we do now! We do now, sucka!"
Scarlett slapped her forehead a little too hard. "Should've uhh, listed to your girl over there. She seems to be the smart one."
"You simulated my grandson's genitalia?! Y-y-you bunch of diabolical sons of bitches!" Rick's balled his hand into a fist. Without thinking Scarlett grabbed it in an attempt to calm his down. The group of Zigerions all laughing around them.
A heavy sigh passed through his lips. "All right. Okay. All right, great. Wonderful. You win. Can we go home now?" The bitterness in Rick's voice made Scarlett cringe.
"I don't know can you?" another Zigerion asked causing them to all break out in a fit of giggles again.
"Nice. Okay, okay. Show this gullible turd to his shuttle. I'm done with him. Oh, wait. Let me get a picture." The ring leader of the group took a quick selfie with Rick who was more than over this whole thing. "Aww. Look at his face. He's trying to figure out if He's in a simulation still. Are you, Rick? Are you?" The pink headed ass laughed some more and a growl started in Scarlett's throat. "You're not. Or are you?" The idiot kept going but before Scarlett could punch him in her overly large head Rick grabbed her arm.
Giving her a look he let her go and she took the moment of freedom to smack the nearest Zigerion right in the face. The gasp he let out was more than girlie; Scarlett took another second to stick her to stick her tongue out at the ass hat.
It wasn't long before they were finally on a really pod back to earth. Jerry sulking in the corner and Scarlett couldn't help but want to sulk to. "Hey, Jerry, don't worry about it. So what if the most meaningful day of your life was a simulation operating at minimum capacity?"
"You know what, Rick? Those guys took you for a ride, too. You should try having a little respect for the dummies of the universe, now that you're one of us." He snapped back.
"Maybe you're right, Jerry. Maybe you're right." Rick mumbled and Scarlett couldn't help but let a sigh pass through her lips.
Waiting a second longer Scarlett finally opened her mouth but was silenced by a loud boom that shook the whole space craft. "Whoa! What the hell?! W-what happened back there?" Jerry asked trying to look out one of the windows into space.
"Why don't you ask the smartest people in the universe, Jerry? Oh, yeah. You can't. They blew up." Rick grabbed his flask out of his lab coat and took a long deserved sip.
Scarlett felt a different feeling in the pit of stomach, a flutter almost, and a tiny smirk played on the edges of her mouth. Pride overtaking the feeling of disappointment from only a second ago. After a moment Rick's eyes found hers, a burp escaped his mouth before he passed the flask over to his accomplice.