Chapter 14

Samantha pulled her hand back. She wasn't going to let herself believe so easily. Jake didn't try to get her hand back. He sat down on the floor and stared out onto the lake. Sam quietly looked at him, waiting.

"But, I just never had the guts to tell you. It took forever for me to even let myself acknowledge it." Jake spoke into the lake. "I pretended it was only brotherly affection. That that's why I was so protective." He stopped to take a deep breath.

"People would tell me. Darrell. My brothers. Even my dad. They'd all make fun of me. Then I went to go visit the college I was going to go to and I met Dana. She was different. Very nice, talkative. She reminded me a little of you." Jake chuckled. Sam was still standing up, listening intently to every word that Jake was saying. This is what she had been waiting for, the truth.

"We got to know each other that weekend. When the weekend ended we exchanged phone numbers. We texted and chatted almost every day. We talked as much as we could." Jake turned to look at Sam. "See by this time I had already admitted to myself that I was madly in love with you. And I didn't want to Samantha. I was confused. So I thought maybe Dana would make me see that I really did love you like a brother." Jake looked back to the river.

"That day you were talking about she came down to visit. The next day we were going to drive to our new school together. I brought her horseback riding because she said she loved horses. I was determined to forget these feelings I had discovered towards you so I gave them to her. Maybe falling in love with Dana would make me forget I loved you, I don't know." Jake took another deep breath. He began picking up rocks and trying to make them skip across the river.

"And what about now?" Samantha said almost emotionless.

"Well, me and Dana were in a relationship the whole time we were there." Jake said sounding a little bitter.

"Why'd you say it like that? You did tell her you loved her." Sam said, her emotionless voice turning almost accusatory.

"Yeah, I did. And so did she. Neither of us meant it. I can assure you of that." Jake's voice got hard. "You see I'm going to tell you about me and Dana even though I know you don't want to hear about it." Jake stopped to gather his thoughts again. "Well the first couple of months where great, except for the fact that every time I was with her I wished it were you. After a while though she grew on me. Dana wasn't a bad person; she just made a lot of bad choices. She cheated. A couple of times through our four years there I caught her cheating." Jake stopped.

Sam didn't know what to say or do. She decided to sit down next to him. They both sat facing the river, breathing in harmony.

"It hurt." Jake broke the silence. "I'm not going to lie. It hurt a lot. I did have strong feelings for her. I mean we were together for a year and a half the first time. A little past our second anniversary the second time. And on our third anniversary I caught her with my supposed friend. I really fell for that girl. But you know why I kept forgiving her Samantha?" Jake turned to look at Sam and Sam looked back at Jake.

"I forgave her because she wasn't you. Me loving you as much as I do reminded me that in a way I had always and would always be cheating on her. My feelings for her where nothing like the ones for you, so I was never really devastated to hear she was doing this with whoever. In a way it was even a relief to hear things like that." Jake stopped again. The last rays of sunlight where shining down on them, warming them up when each felt so cold inside.

"Right before we graduated she came to talk to me. Told me something I had been suspecting for so long. Turned out the whole time she had kept her high school boyfriend. So ever vacation, holiday, she'd be with him. She said that the only reason she was with him was because she found very hard to break up with him. Family reasons or something. Told me that as soon as she went back though she was going to do it and then she was going to come down to see me and we can finally be together, just us, or something. I stopped listening. I told her not to bother. I had made up my mind to I was done pretending. Obviously you were not something I could so easily forget, even though I thought you hated me. We would have gotten into an argument but the ceremony began and afterwards I packed up and left. We haven't talked since." Jake finished and stared at the river for a while. The last ray of sunshine disappeared and Jake stood up.

"Its late you should get home." He said trying to change the subject.

"So are you together or not?" Sam said while she was getting up.

"I say we're not. But I don't know. Things didn't really end up like they should have." Jake said eager to finish the conversation. Sam noticed this.

"What used up all the words you were allowed for ten years?" Sam tried to lighten up the mood a little. Even if she had been hurt by Jake, Jake had been hurt too, a lot, and far worse. Besides he loves me! The selfish, childish, side of Sam was jumping up and down ecstatic with joy. Jake suddenly grabbed Sam's arm and pulled her towards him.

"Sam, I am very sorry I hurt you. I never meant to. Now you know everything and I understand if you are still guarded and stuff but I just want you to know that I do love you. A lot. And I will get things straight with Dana. Like I said before my heart has always and will always belong to you." Jake said in such a deep and sincere voice that Sam couldn't help but let a tear fall down. Jake stopped it with his thumb and smiled slyly.

"Brat, are you crying of happiness cus' you won't hear me speaking for another ten years seeing as I just spent all my words?" Jake said chuckling.

"Ugh! Ruin a good moment." Sam answered back though she couldn't help chuckle with Jake.

"We should get back before you get in trouble." Jake said motioning towards the horses.

"Yeah, I don't wanna end up like Jen." Samantha grumbled her agreeance.

They headed towards their horses, mounted on, and headed back to River Bend Ranch. Neither of them spoke, each was lost in their own thoughts. Though it was a silent ride, it was a comfortable silence. And in that same comfortable silence they got the horses back to the pastures. Jake walked Sam towards the ranch house and when they were a couple of yards away Sam stopped Jake and turned him towards her.

"So where does that leave us?" Sam asked very determined.

"I don't know that's all up to you." Jake answered a little taken off guard by the sudden question.

"Well things are still hazy between you and Dana right?" Sam asked while still thinking about what it was that she wanted.

"I guess, yes. For her anyway." Jake answered.

"Well I'd feel much better if things cleared up before anything that could happen between me and you does, so I say we just stay how we are now." Sam said though a part of her inside was sad.

"I'm okay with being just friends." Jake said with the most honest voice and biggest sincere smile ever that Sam's face fell, she hoped that maybe he would put up a little bit of a fight at least. Jake laughed at her reaction and grabbed her hand. He raised it up to his lips then kissed it gently but with passion brewing underneath.

"For now." Jake said as he began walking towards his car, still laughing.

Sam felt the blood rush up to her face, a big smile formed on her lips. She turned towards the house and hurried in. Sam had to tell someone about this now.

He loves me like I love him! Sam kept saying to herself. Smiling.