One Shots

Installment 7

Trust

This is a one shot that I have been thinking about after the bike scene – or an extended scene from the bike scene – where Jamie and Eddie discuss working together and what goal(s) they want to see at the 2-9. I am not sure where BB is heading with that storyline but, I for one, cannot wait to see where they take them. One thing is for sure I think they are as strong as ever. And if any duo is going to pull this off, it's them.

I don't own Blue Bloods or their characters. I just like to have fun with them. And putting to paper what I envision in my head. :-)

Jamko…Jamko…Jamko…Jamko

"Is that what we're doing turning this precinct around?" Eddie asked, still skeptical. She was still mad at him and still reeling from the harsh punishment. She didn't get why the hell he had to be such a hard ass. But it made sense to her – to some extent – that he wanted her and Maya to bond. They themselves had bonded after some serious and tense situations. Eddie was also a bit taken aback because if anyone was her worst critic, it was herself. She was petrified that instead of helping Jamie, she was hindering him. And now him saying maybe she going to the 2-9 may have been a bad idea? Well she was kind of freaking out. But in her heart, she knew it was the right move. She needed to have Jamie's back. And Jamie would see it too. She hoped that he already had seen it and that this new obstacle is just another hurdle they need to get through. As a newly engaged couple.

"Yeah. One cop at a time." Jamie responded, looking at her and half smiling at her. "I need you to bond with Maya, Eddie." Jamie repeated himself. How could he make her understand that above anything else, the most important thing to him was her safety? His main priority was to protect her. As her Sergeant of course but as her fiancé? That went without saying. And he was both. So, she needed to be cognizant of that. But if he needed to choose? He would always choose fiancé over Sergeant. His love for her wouldn't let it be any other way. He had waited years for her. And now he was not taking any chances.

"Why is it so important to you?" Eddie asked, truly perplexed.

Jamie confessed his thoughts: "I need her to have your back when you both are out on the streets. I need to know that she likes you and trusts you and is loyal to you because I am not out there with you. She is. And she has to have your back. If anything happened to you…" Jamie intentionally left that sentence open ended. So many things – all negative – if she were to be hurt would annihilate him. Render him useless if he was honest. He sighed deeply and went ahead and finished his thought: "If anything happened to you, I would not be able to bare it. I would be destroyed. I swear to you it's the truth."

"Jamie. I get it. The same goes for me. My instinct is to always protect you. So, I hope you realize how hard it is for me to hear people talk shit about you. My defenses rise immediately. I think I was very tame when I defended you to her. But still I defended you. I couldn't not do it. You are mine. And while you are scared shitless that something may happen to me? I am scared shitless that these whiners at the 2-9 are just angling for something and not being informed kills me."

Jamie pulled her close. "I know. I feel the same way about you and their perception of you. But you and I? We are a team. Always. And I need you. I need you to help me fix the 2-9. I'm serious. I took those vows to heart when we said them a few weeks ago again and you convinced me that coming to the 2-9 was for the greater good." Jamie stated. "I can't do this without you babe."

"Do you think we can do this?" Eddie asked.

"I think so. Sometimes I digress. Like five minutes ago." Jamie said, as he rolled his eyes. "But you have to know that there is no one else I would rather do this with, than you. You are my person. The one I count on. The one I love. The one that I tell my insecurities to."

Eddie nodded her head: "We will get it done together. It's just been so hard. And really…foot patrol?" She asked, again. "I really hate you for that."

"I know you do." Jamie said, as he leaned down and touched his forehead to hers. "But I love you. Even when I yell at you. Even when you want to kill me. Even when you give me the silent treatment."

"Even when you take my wheels away. When I finally got to drive too. You never let me." Eddie said, as she half smiled at him.

Jamie rolled his eyes and answered: "Even then I love you goof."

"This isn't going to be easy but I'm in. I have to be. I'm engaged to you. I have this beautiful ring to prove it too." She exclaims, as she waves her left hand in front of his face. "And I am not giving it back."

Jamie laughed at that and bent down to briefly kiss her. "You're ridiculous. Can we enjoy the rest of our Sunday now? I rarely have you to myself and we're due to dinner at the house in a few hours. Can this time be only about you and me? And how much I want to spend time with my fiancé? Whom I love."

"One last question. Do you feel at all bad when you yell at me? When you bust me and when you make me upset?" Eddie asked. Because truth was that every time that they fought and he yelled at her, it broke her a bit. And she would get over it and defend herself and sometimes even win the battle. But at the beginning, it always messed with her. And she needed to know if it affected him.

That question gutted him a little. A lot actually if he was honest. For her to ask that meant that she doubted this was hard on him. And it was. Jamie responded: "It kills me. That I know you're mad at me. It kills me that you think I think you did something wrong. That you think I don't treat you right. That you think I don't do a good job of separating the job and personal stuff. It guts me each and every time."

"Well one thing we do well is fight." Eddie pointed out. "But I feel bad for a bit. And it makes me sad sometimes. I hate fighting with you."

"I really hate fighting with you." Jamie deadpanned.

"Jamie when we fight – really fight – we fight. This wasn't that. This was a misunderstanding. And yes, I was upset but I've been more upset at you prior to us being together and engaged. The good thing with us is that we end up talking about it eventually. And we settle the fight and we move on."

"You said you had 5 things that you thought were a bad idea. You know what scares me the most? Of all the ideas you could have?"

Eddie just looked at Jamie but didn't respond.

Jamie continued: "That you decide that it's not worth marrying me."

"What?" Eddie asked, astonished. Really? How could he think that?

"I know you love me. And most of the time we're solid. But sometimes – way in the back of my mind – I panic. It's a fleeting panic and mainly lasts for a few seconds. Then I get it together and know what we've been through to get here. What we've sacrificed. And I get my head on straight. But when you say things like there's five things you are thinking were a bad idea my stomach freefalls." Jamie finishes, his heart in his hand.

"I never will take back my yes. Ever Jamie." Eddie exclaimed, as she put both of her hands on his chest. "You are the love of my life. You may drive me crazy but I love you. I love you more than I can fathom. I would never be able to walk away from you. You are everywhere inside of me. I cannot live my life without you."

Jamie let out a breath he didn't even know he was holding. "I don't think I could bare it if I lost you."

"The five things that went through my mind were simple. One, can I trust Maya? Two, did Jamie see something in Maya that he thought I could trust and I'm just not seeing it? Three, I'm mad because it's hard to not let things that happen with you and me at work get personal and I have to be better at that. Four, I think I am failing at helping you. And five, am I being more of a burden to you than a helper. But never, ever, Jamie do I believe my love for you is a mistake, or a bad idea, or that me saying yes to your proposal was a bad idea."

"Okay well I'm not sure you can trust Maya yet but I did see something in her that tells me she has a lot of potential. It's hard for the both of us to separate personal and work so we both have to work at it – together. More importantly, you are not failing me. You are all I have. It would be a thousand times harder to do this without you. And no, you are not a burden to me. Never will you be a burden. I do need you and I trust you. Implicitly."

"I trust you Jamie." Eddie said, as well. "No retreat. No surrender." She finalized.

"No retreat, no surrender babe." Jamie repeated.

He bent down to kiss her full on the mouth. He didn't care who was passing by or who saw them. This conversation was one they had to have to clear the air. And truth be told he needed her. He wanted her. "Screw the bike ride. Let's go home. I want to make love to you right now. Before we head to dinner."

"No need to tell me twice." Eddie said, as she slapped his ass. "Let's go."

Jamko…Jamko…Jamko…Jamko

After dinner they said goodbye to everyone and got in the Mustang. "How could we forget to send a card?" Jamie said, as he widened his eyes and half smiled at her before grinning to her, showing his teeth and making a slightly scared face. As he had done at dinner.

"We?" Eddie mocked. "Don't I get a pass? This is my first year of family birthday's. Regan family birthdays."

"Yeah. Yeah. Yeah." Jamie acquiesced. "I've been so preoccupied with us, the job, our fights, our misunderstanding. It was nice to Face Time Jack. We will pick up a card on our way home."

"A belated birthday card babe." Eddie said, as she rubbed his arm.

He chuckled. "Yes. We can send him some more mad money. I'm sure he will need it."

"That's a great idea honey. We should actually sync our calendars and input everyone's birthday. That way I can help you remember. Not that I'm the best at remembering but I am a bit better at checking our calendar."

"You know what I am looking forward to?" Jamie asked, as he turned to look at her and grasped her hand. "Our first holidays together."

"Me too." She admitted. "Looking forward to spending time with your family. I don't think I have celebrated a holiday in a long time. Well at least not with my family intact. But I think I am looking forward to you and I spending the holidays together – only you and I. Prior to going to your family's. We have so many to look forward to but the first one is always special."

"Our family." Jamie said. It didn't matter how many times he had to remind her, he would. She was his family now. And the love he felt for her grew exponentially day by day. His family would always be the Reagans but as soon as Eddie became his wife – and quite frankly, currently in his heart – his immediate family would be the two of them. And whatever children they may have. She would be his number one. No one mattered more than her.

"Our family." Eddie repeated. "Jamie…I worry."

"About?"

"Well so many things but I see your family and I am growing to love them and I am just not sure about mine. My dad is in jail and my mom well…she's special."

"Special?" He asked, "How is that?"

"She is not like me – at all. That's why we clash most of the time. She's very much still into appearances. Even after we fell from the pedestal we were in. When we had money. Well when they had money."

"Eddie, it'll be fine. I want to meet her. I've met your dad."

"Yeah. But it's not like I went ahead and introduced him. He was in the hospital. I just don't want my mom to offend you. Sometimes – well most of the time – she has no filter. And she's not happy that I did not seek a more "woman" friendly job. And that I did not look for someone to take care of me."

"Take care of you?" Jamie kept on asking questions. Eddie rarely spoke of her family and the truth was that he wanted to meet her mom. And he wanted to know her family as she was getting to know his.

"You know marry a millionaire so he can give me everything my dad took away from us when he went to jail."

"I'll always take care of you. Maybe not with millions but I can protect you."

"Babe. I don't care about money. I think you know that. I want to love you and you to love me. I want normalcy. I want a life with you. My mom? She still thinks that a man keeping me in Prada, Gucci and in Louis Vuitton and Chanel bags is what is important."

"You two are very different." Jamie stated. "And truly did you have all that you mentioned? All the designer labels?"

"Yes." Eddie said. "And for a while that's all I knew. And all I wanted. And then my world came crashing down. And I was thrown into the real world and I learned quick that those labels and the cars and the fancy house? That didn't make a home. What makes a home is the people that you are surrounded with. And the love that they show you.

"I still have to meet her babe."

"What if you hate her?"

"What if she hates me?" Jamie stated.

"I don't hate you. I love you. That's what matters."

"And I love you. So, if you mom approves of us or not it doesn't matter. We matter. But we have to give her a chance to meet me and you have to give me a chance to meet her and win her over. I know your family is different from mine but Eddie it is your family and whether you're comfortable with it or not, we are going to have to meet."

"Ugh…I know." Eddie finally exclaimed. "I'll set it up." She grabbed his hand and laid her other hand on of theirs. But don't say I didn't warn you."

"I love you shorty." He said, as he turned his attention back to the road.

"I love you Scout." She replied.

Jamko…Jamko…Jamko…Jamko