.

.

"The time to hesitate is through

No time to wallow in the mire

Try now we can only lose

And our love become a funeral pyre

Come on baby, light my fire"

–The Doors, "Light My Fire"

(:)(A)(:)

Ignite

Chapter 18: Blaze

(:)(A)(:)

Overall, Lucy loved rain. Rain to her meant a day curled up on the couch, a book in one hand and a steaming cup of hot chocolate in the other, with nothing but the sound of the water tapping on the roof for music. It was peaceful and, often, rejuvenating.

Basically the exact opposite of the situation she was stuck in now.

The rain was warm; the air humid. Natsu walked ahead of her, his shoulders squared and his paces long, and Lucy couldn't help but feel bitterness rise in her throat. For the past two days, ever since that incident where that pervert groped her, it had been just like this. He never walked beside her, and only the occasional glances he made over his shoulder assured her that she hadn't been completely forgotten.

Questions burned on her tongue, but he never gave her much opportunity to voice them. Even when they checked into their room at Greenstown, he had been quick to roll out his traveling mat along the farthest wall from the bed and declared he was going to sleep. Last night, camping under the open stars, was no different. Other than insisting she use his futon (since she had forgotten a sleeping bag in her rush) he had barely said a word to her.

Staring at the pink strands of hair peeking over his pack, darkened and weighed down by rain, she bit the inside of her cheek. It didn't feel right, asking those kinds of questions to his back. She wanted to be facing him so she could at least gauge his expression when she asked why he pulled away – why he didn't kiss her when he so obviously wanted to.

She had turned that moment over and over in her mind. Had she done something to make him think she didn't want it? Did he mistake her breathy sigh of his name as a signal to stop? She wanted answers and, more importantly, she wanted this thing coming between them gone. She was angry at him for not telling her where they stood and angry at herself for just not knowing.

Her patience was running thin, and the rain dripping from her hair and making her clothes waterlogged and heavy was not helping to improve her mood. So, really, it was no surprise that by the time they walked through the inn's wooden doors she was as taut as a piano wire and ready to snap. Natsu held the door open, allowing her to enter first, but it did little to improve her mood. Besides noting how uncharacteristically chivalrous the action was, Lucy was quick to see that his eyes were trained on anything but her. She stomped past him purposely, secretly hoping the display of anger would scare some freaking sense into him.

"Good afternoon," the hostess chirped, dark hair pinned up into a loose bun. Her smile faltered when neither Lucy or Natsu smiled back. There was a question in her gaze as she looked between them, but she wisely kept it to herself. "How many rooms?"

"One."

"Two."

Lucy's gaze snapped towards him, her eyes sharp as she pinned him with her fiercest glare. "Since when?!" Natsu's eyes widened at the edge in her voice but seemed to think better than to answer. With some irritation she noticed that his hair and clothes were suddenly dry, and realized he must have used his magic. Normally she wouldn't even care, but she was drenched and miserable and god damn it she was just angry. She turned back to the receptionist, who was now looking between the two with carefully masked concern. "One room," she said firmly, trying to temper her fury.

The girl behind the counter nodded, clumsily grabbing a ring of keys and searching through them. In the otherwise silent lobby, Lucy could hear the jangle of brass as the they knocked together until, finally, the brunette found the appropriate one. Nervously, her dark eyes darted between Lucy and Natsu. "Um, that will be 6000 jewel for the night, um, that is, if you only wanted one night. Otherwise –"

Lucy cut her off, pulling money from her bag and sliding the damp bills over the counter. "Just tonight."

Nodding hastily, the receptionist quickly handed over the key without even bothering to count the money. "Um, right, of course. Room 12 is going to be down that hallway," she squeaked, seeming more than a little eager to get them out of the lobby. Lucy couldn't really blame her.

Giving a grumbled 'thanks' before taking the cold metal key into her palm, she stalked down the hallway. She didn't even bother to look back to see if Natsu was following her or not – she could feel his eyes burning into her shoulder blades. Shaking, she shoved the key into the lock and swung the door open.

She stormed in, shoving her (equally drenched) suitcase to the side before looking up expectantly. Natsu lingered in the hallway, hesitating. He was anxious, she could see it in his expression. He always was when her temper surfaced, but this was something else. She knew it was something else. And damn it she was just done.

He promised he wouldn't shut her out again. He promised. Natsu has always kept his word, and Lucy was determined to make sure he didn't stop now. She waited till he crossed the threshold and stepped into the room, arms crossed over her chest, before kicking the door closed. She didn't miss the way he openly flinched at the sound of the latch clicking shut. "Talk."

He shrugged off his backpack, eyes lingering on the single window across the room as the bag dropped to the floor. "I'm – it's kinda musty in here. I'm just – gonna open the window."

Was he really trying to deflect right now? No. No way in hell was she letting him off the hook. Not this time. She blocked his path, not missing the way he took a stumbling step away from her. Her eyes narrowed, and she could practically feel her blood pressure rising. "Natsu. Talk. What the hell is going on?"

"I don't –"

She stalked towards him, fisting both hands in his (irritatingly dry) shirt before he could retreat, cutting him off before he could finish. "You know damn well what I'm talking about," she hissed. He was frozen in her grasp, probably fearing her wrath, but hey – at least he was finally looking at her. Even if his expression was more panicked than apologetic.

He swallowed thickly, but his mouth must have been dry because his voice sounded almost gravely. "The window –"

She growled in frustration. "Damn it, forget the stupid window! What is wrong with you?!" She released his shirt, hands gesturing to him accusingly. "You've been avoiding me like the freaking plague and now suddenly you want separate rooms?!" Pointedly, she jabbed a finger to the center of his chest. "You've never asked for two rooms!"

She paused, giving him the opportunity to answer, but the only sound between them was her breathing, and the only movement was the heavy rise and fall of her chest as she struggled to keep her anger under control. His silence and, infuriatingly, unapologetic expression was making it increasingly hard to refrain from strangling him. "Damn it, Natsu, are you even –"

He leaned forward, and Lucy didn't really notice how close she had been standing to him until she felt the sudden press of his lips against hers. She stilled, the hum of anger that had been buzzing beneath her skin, prickling at her fingertips, quickly evolving into something else entirely. Something warmer – something hungry.

Her fingers curled in the cotton of his shirt, not entirely sure if her intent was to keep him anchored or herself, as she leaned up into the kiss – lips parting and the breath she didn't even realize she was holding leaving with a sigh. Beneath her hands she felt him shiver in response, his fingers brushing against her jaw before slipping into her wet hair. His gaze was half lidded, a heat darkening the green of his irises, and then his lips were moving against hers with tantalizing, careful pressure.

Maybe it was because he had denied her this kiss several days ago; maybe it was because even though the rain was warm, his rejection had left her cold and lonely and angry. Hell, maybe she was just greedy, but suddenly the relatively chaste kiss wasn't enough. She angled her mouth across his, pulling him closer and all but drowning in the taste of him.

She heard his growl only a split second before she found herself with her back against the wall and the hard lines of Natsu's body pressed intimately, possessively, against her own. The gasp that left her lips sounded needy to her own ears – an encouragement for more – but suddenly she was alone. Disoriented, her eyes blinked open and found him staring at her – horrified – from across the room.

"Oh, oh, shit," he blurted, eyes wide and voice flirting on the edge of full blown panic. "I didn't mean for – I'm so sorry!"

Breathless, and more than a little dizzy from the sudden loss of him, she leaned bonelessly against the wall. "What?"

Color rose to his cheeks faster than she'd ever seen it, but maybe it was because he had been so pale only a moment before. "I – I didn't ask." His words were soft – tempered by shame. When her response was a slow, baffled blink he continued; his words tumbling out in a rush. "I – You never gave – I didn't ask for permission."

She gave a small, breathless, laugh. "Natsu, if I didn't want – I kissed you back." She licked her lips, eyes glancing at his parted mouth. She was half a second away from inviting him back, but the stiffness in his shoulders – the way he was still staring at that stupid window like it was some kind of escape route – was a cold confirmation that it wasn't just his urge to kiss her that he'd been hiding. "What's going on, Natsu? I thought – every time I think we're on the same page you push me away."

His eyes met her's briefly, pained. "I'm not. I swear I'm not."

She pushed the wet hair away from her face, frustrated but mostly just disappointed. "Well it sure as hell feels like it." When he didn't respond, she sighed. "You promised you wouldn't shut me out."

He flinched, his tone defensive. "I'm not."

"You are! Natsu, you won't even look at me! Ever since we left Hargeon, you've been distant. I want to know why! I deserve to know why."

He cursed under his breath, hands running through his hair before gripping at the strands at the back of his head. He took a deep breath, chest rising, before he gave another – louder – curse. "Fuck. Fine. Just – fuck. Let me open the window."

She stared at him, incredulous. "Seriously? What is it with that damn window?"

"I just need some fresh air, alright?!" he snapped, shoving the window all the way open before leaning on the sill – facing the breeze. Outside the rain was still falling steadily, each drop hitting against the buildings wooden shingles with a hollow tap. With the window open the sound was loud enough to disguise the murmured words slipping past his lips. She didn't ask him to speak up. Somehow she knew that whatever he was muttering about wasn't for her anyway.

When he finally spoke his voice was softer, loud enough to be heard clearly over the rain but with a gentleness that wasn't there before. "Just – give me a minute to clear my head, ok? The scent – it's just – it's suffocating in here, and I –" he winced, giving her a vulnerable smile that made her knees weak with worry. "I don't want to screw this up."

She swallowed, her throat feeling tight. Why did it feel like he was talking about more than just an explanation? Why did it feel like he was talking about them? "You won't," she said, her voice strengthening until it held no room for doubt. "You can't." Didn't he know that?

The breathy scoff that passed his lips was full of skepticism. "I think you're forgetting how shitty I am with words," he grumbled.

The corner of her mouth curled into a little smile despite the anxiety churning in her stomach. It was the most Natsu like thing he'd said in days. "I think we'll manage. We always do, right?" When he still looked hesitant, her smile faded and she sighed, gesturing towards the door. "But if it would help, I can go ask about switching rooms?"

He blinked, brows drawn. "Switch rooms," he echoed, "Why?"

She shrugged. "Because of the smell? I mean, I don't notice it, but you said it's suffocating?"

The huff of laughter he gave was small and short lived – smothered by a nervousness she didn't understand. "It's not the room, Luce."

For a few moments she was completely lost, but when the implication hit her she reeled back, as if struck. "Me?!"

"Yeah, you." He ran a hand down his face, watching her miserably between his fingers and his voice almost a whimper, "and your stupid shirt isn't really helping either."

Her shirt? She glanced down and immediately felt her own cheeks grow hot. The rain had soaked through the light pink fabric and the white lacy bra she wore underneath was clearly visible. "Oh," she breathed, suddenly understanding. "That's... that's why you were walking ahead of me."

His voice sounded strangled. "Yeah. And, you know, other things." When she shot him a questioning glance his face flamed. He cleared his throat, making a vague gesture to his hips.

Lucy's eyes followed. "Oh," she breathed. Not his hips. Definitely not his hips.

Embarrassed, and maybe a little empowered by the information, she tucked a wet strand of hair behind her ear. "Right, um, the scent though? I'm not wearing any perfume... I don't..." She didn't understand. Natsu must have suspected as much because he groaned, his hands clasped behind his head as he stared up at the ceiling. He took a deep breath through his mouth and closed his eyes before muttering something unintelligible under his breath.

Lucy squinted, turning his murmurings over in her head several times and still not understanding. "What?"

He repeated himself, louder this time and more strained. "You're in heat." He looked like he was praying for the ground to open up and swallow him whole.

She frowned, her brow creasing. Heat? What the hell was he – oh. Oh! She wasn't sure her face could get any hotter. "You can tell when I'm ovulating?!"

He cringed. "Maybe? Is that what you call it?"

"That's – oh my – that's why you were holding your breath! B–before and – oh god at the guild!" Her fingers weaved through the hair at the base of her scalp, becoming more embarrassed by the second. She sent him an accusatory look. "I thought you said I smelled nice!"

"You do," he groaned.

"But–"

He interrupted, frustrated. "Damn it, it's – it's like –" He floundered, hands raised and grasping at the air as if he could catch the right words. "Fucking hell, I don't know how to – pie! It's like pie, ok? When you smell it you get all hungry and you want it, right? It's like that."

Baffled, she shook her head as she struggled to process. "And... Wait, am I supposed to be the pie?"

The laugh he gave was humorless – maybe even a bit pained. "Luce, you're the whole fucking bakery."

"Oh." She felt her breath leave her in a rush, her heart drumming against her ribs. "So... when I'm – you know – uh, in heat, it makes you want to, um, eat pie?"

When she saw his mortified look she suddenly realized what she had implied and found herself struggling for words. "No! I didn't mean – not that I – I meant – damn it! Can we please drop the pie metaphor?"

He looked like he was ready to choke, and when he finally found his voice it came out as a strained wheeze. "Can we, just – I mean, maybe, not talk about this? At least, maybe, not now?" he pleaded.

"No! This is important." And it was. How many days had it been since her birthday? Four? Five? Did her scent start effecting him that early? Were all those heated looks just a side effect?

"Is... is it the same with the others?" she asked softly. Had she read too much into his actions? This whole time she had assumed the heat in his eyes was because he was burning for her, but if anyone made him feel this way...

He was quiet for a long time, looking torn. Finally, after sinking to the floor with his back against the opposite wall, he answered almost defeatedly. "No. Just you."

"And, is... is it only because of... that? I mean..."

His eyes snapped to hers. "No," he said, without even a hint of hesitation. "No... I – " He swallowed thickly, wetting his lips as the muscles in his jaw worked. "It's – the urge is just stronger, but... fuck." He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck, gaze dropping sheepishly. "Luce, I never not want you." He flinched, "Shit, that sounds bad – I don't – it's not just about that. I want you, like, all of you. As in I – damn it, this really isn't how this conversation was suppose to happen. I didn't – I had a plan –"

She understood – could feel his meaning soak into her skin and warm her very bones. In her chest her heart raced and her lungs, full, still felt breathless. She wanted him too. She wanted him now and forever.

"Natsu," her voice was steadier than she imagined, considering how breathless she felt. "Ask me."

He blinked up at her, brow furrowed in a mixture of confusion and something else she couldn't quite place. "What?"

Her eyes, dark but focused, locked with his. Gingerly pushing herself from the wall, fingers sliding along the textured surface, she stepped towards him with a level of confidence she never thought she'd have. "Ask me for permission," she repeated.

Understanding found him, igniting his eyes with panic, and he scrambled to get up from the floor as she neared. His back and shoulders pressed against the wall as if he was trying to sink into it. "Luce," he wheezed, the tightness in his chest seeming to choke off his words. "This isn't – Damn it, weren't you listening? I'm not exactly in control here."

Her hands reached him, skimming up to his shoulders and reveling in the way he shuddered. "I'm not asking you to be," she whispered, tilting her face up to his. It would be so easy to pull him down to her, to close the small distance between them. She could feel his shaky breath teasing her lips with the possibilities of more. She knew he could feel hers too. Between them his hand crept up until it was cupping the side of her neck – fingertips sliding into her hair and his thumb caressing her jaw. His gaze was dark, full of tempered heat and entirely focused on her mouth. He couldn't seem to decide whether he should pull her forward or push her away.

She ached for him – her heart, her body – it all ached to be kissed. To be his. To make him hers. "Natsu," she breathed, almost a whimper. His eyes closed, as if savoring the sound, before reopening and dragging his gaze from her lips to her eyes. His expression was dazed, drunk off of her, but there was still that little sliver of control he hesitated to relinquish. Her fingers tickling the hair at the back of his neck, her voice softly begging. "Please."

It was as if the one word held all the magic in the world, and suddenly he was surging against her. His mouth was on hers, sinfully hot and deliciously firm. One of his hands gripped her hip and pulled her body flush with his while the other angled her chin so that he could taste her more deeply. She responded with equal frenzy, tangling her fingers in his hair and drawing out a groan from the dragon slayer when she took the opportunity to trace his bottom lip with her tongue. Her body felt too hot, and her head was becoming dizzy from lack of proper oxygen but she didn't care.

Natsu shifted, turning them until his body pinned hers against the wall. She could feel the heat of him even through their clothes, but it wasn't enough. Her hands fumbled with the zipper at his collar, desperate for more contact and moaning against his mouth when she felt how deliciously warm his skin was underneath. Against her upper stomach she could feel the hard edges of his belt buckle, trapped between their bodies. Lower, she felt a hardness prodding at her abdomen and felt a wave of heat wash through her. Feeling bold, her hands drifted down – fingertips grazing his sides – before hooking on the leather of his belt.

His rough palms covered her hands as her fingers inched toward the buckle. Natsu pulled away from her mouth, his forehead resting against her own, their noses just touching, and his breath teasing her lips. "Fuck," he growled, a pained grimace etching his features as he fought to catch his breath. A groan escaped him as she took the opportunity to kiss along his jaw. "We gotta stop."

Stop? He had to be joking. She wasn't going to let him back out now. She was done with letting him run away from this, from her. "We really don't," she breathed, her lips skimming his ear.

Beneath her hands she felt him shudder, but the way his eyes fluttered closed told her it was in a very, very good way. He swallowed thickly, his hands tightening on her wrists. "Not really all that great at the whole self control thing, Luce."

She scoffed, because he sure as hell could have fooled her. She gently drew his earlobe into her mouth, letting it drag against her teeth, and basking in the strangled moan she received for her trouble. "Really not seeing the problem."

And she didn't. She loved him, he loved her. There was no one else in the entire universe she trusted more than the man before her. They had been dancing around each other for so, so long. She was tired of waiting, tired of being rational. Every touch made her skin sing, and the taste of him only fueled her hunger for more. Against her ribs her heart beat not out of nervousness or embarrassment, but excitement and longing. She wanted this with him. She wanted everything with him, and she wanted it now.

He gave a husky laugh that sounded more strained than amused. "Didn't think you'd appreciate it if I knocked you up the first time."

She paused. Oh. Well, perhaps not everything now.

Her hands temporarily abandoned his belt before trailing up to his shoulders, one slipping under his scarf in search of skin. Feeling his palms settle on her hips, she sighed approvingly. "Just don't take the bracelet off," she murmured against his jaw. "It's charmed."

"The bracelet?" he echoed, lips brushing against her temple. She could feel his frown. "What kind of asshat buys their date birth control?"

Date? He thought –? She gave a shy laugh, leaning her forehead against his shoulder. "That would be Cana, actually."

A beat of silence, and then he groaned – breath hot against the top of her head. "She didn't."

"She really did," she chirped, tilting her head to whisper conspiratorially against the shell of his ear. "Something about being prepared in the heat of the moment?"

He leaned into her embrace, body pressing against her more firmly as the hands at her hips drifted upwards – thumbs hooking over the hem of her shirt and his rough palms hot against her ribs. "Not sure if I want to strangle her or buy her a keg of whiskey," he admitted, voice low and breath hot against her ear.

She hummed, fingers threading through the pink strands at the base of his neck, nails grazing his scalp. "Why don't you wait till tomorrow to decide?"

"You're playing with fire, Luce," he warned, but there was a subtle grin pulling at his mouth – a playful challenge sharpening his hooded stare.

It only made her want him more.

"Good." She tilted her chin, lips just brushing his as she murmured, "You can warm me up."

He swallowed thickly, a trembling breath escaping him. Under her shirt, his thumbs stroked the sensitive skin just below the underwire of her bra. "You're sure? I don't want..." he trailed off, but Lucy didn't need him to finish.

She understood his fears because, for so long, they had mirrored her own. For years she thought taking this next step would break them, but now... now she thought perhaps they might crumble without it. She needed him – his touch, his smiles – and she wasn't willing to give him up because she was scared about taking a risk. There was still the tiniest prickle of fear, a trepidation for what tomorrow might bring, but she had faith. Faith in him and, perhaps more importantly, faith in them.

"I want this," she whispered, her eyes raising to meet his. "I want you."

"Oh," he breathed, his hands sliding down until he was gripping her hips and pulling her closer. Hovering over her lips, his mouth curled into a grin and his eyes sparked into something positively predatory. His thumbs stroked the skin beneath the waistband of her shorts, teasing the line of lacy underwear hugging her hips. "Well, why didn't you just say so?"

She had thought that her attempts at stripping him had made that perfectly clear, but she didn't bother to say as much. His mouth was on hers, heated and unyielding, and thoroughly preventing her from arguing. Not that she would have – she was far too busy imagining ways to make him moan, and much too distracted by the callused hand fondling her breast.

She gasped, fingers reaching between their bodies to clumsily undo his belt buckle and – this time – was met with no resistance.

(:)(A)(:)

Firstly, I want to thank you all for your patience – life has been a whirlwind since my last update and to say that my life has gone through some changes is an understatement.

My husband was accepted into a Radiology Tech program... four weeks before the start date. What this meant for us was that we had four weeks to finish the projects around the house (finish shiplapping the master, fix the fence, spruce up the front yard, etc), get said house up for sale, find him a part time/short hour position, move out of the house (because showing a house with a toddler living in it is something I hope to never have to experience), and move in with my parents. So, yeah, lots of changes.

Things are finally settled down – house is sold, things are sold or packed away, and the monster baby is officially adjusted to his new home. I hope to have updates out quicker for you guys now that things are settled, but if they don't then please just know that they will come. We are two chapters and an epilougue away from the finish line, folks. I'm not giving up on this baby now.

Speaking of babies, I think you all have an idea of where the next chapter is heading but just in case you'd like me to spell it out for you, here you go.

The next chapter is pure, baby–making–practice, lemony, smut.

Seriously. That's all it is. So if you want to shield your eyes then don't hesitate to skip the next chapter. You won't miss anything important to the plot.

Secondly, thank you all for sticking with me! Your support and kindness is what never fails to drive me to see this baby finished!

And as always, a big thank you to madartiste, who consistently helps make this fic the best it can be. :)