~Chapter 4: Adults Are Weird~
Naruto had pretty much resigned himself to sleeping in the attic for the rest of his life. Mana Mi seemed to believe it was an appropriate punishment for his "delinquent behavior". To some degree, she was correct: it was something of a punishment. There were, after all, spiders. Naruto did not like spiders.
Other than that, it really wasn't that bad. It was a little drafty during the winter, sure, but he had blankets. It was a little lonely, but now he had people to hang out with at school (he hesitated to call them friends, they'd only eaten together the one time). He could wait until school.
Really the worst part about being locked up in the attic was that it allowed him to think. Anyone who knew Naruto knew that that was a very bad thing. It usually led to some of his most devious pranks. Or his strangest made up Jutsu. Or he got bored enough to sneak out and wreak some havoc.
But Naruto wasn't thinking about any of those things right now. All he could think about was the fight he'd had with Maru-bachan.
He'd never really gotten into a fight with a friend before. Was she even his friend? There were only two other people in his life to compare his relationship with Maru to. One being Iruka-sensei, who mostly just yelled at him and gave him free food. Not really a solid basis for a friendship. The other relationship was with Jiji who really only visited once a month. Unless, of course, he pulled a particularly vicious prank. In that case, the Hokage made an exception. His friendship with Shikamaru and Choji was too new for him to be able to tell where it would go. Come to think of it, so was his relationship with Maru. He'd met her, what, two days ago? Maybe three.
Be that as it may, he still felt terrible. His mouth often got him in trouble, but he'd never actually hurt anyone with his words before. Annoyed them, yes, but never hurt.
She had hurt him, too, of course. That wasn't a new feeling to Naruto. People rarely ever said things to hurt him directly. It was in the gossip he caught when he was hiding after pulling a good prank. In the whispered conversations of the orphanage staff when they thought he wasn't around. The looks the parents of other kids at the academy gave him when they picked up their children and saw "that boy" near their kids. Then their children started catching on to their disdain and started avoiding him, too.
The way Maru had hurt him was different. Not good, but different. She had hurt him for a tangible reason, as opposed to just disliking him from the beginning like the rest of the village. He'd asked about her husband and then she insulted him. So...something must have happened to her husband. Maybe he'd died a horrible death. Or maybe he just left her. She was mean enough.
Alright, now he felt like a terrible person for even thinking that. He wasn't the most well-mannered person, but even he knew that was a cruel way of thinking.
Now his head hurt. He wasn't used to actually having to think about the relationships he had. He was used to having it one of two ways: being ignored or being hated. Iruka-sensei and Jiji were the only exceptions; Maru and Chi were also exceptions, he supposed, but they weren't the same as Jiji and Iruka-sensei. Well, Chi was nice like them, but not Maru. But Chi was nice in a different way than Iruka-sensei. And the way Iruka-sensei was nice was different than Jiji's. Jiji's way of being nice was different than either of them. Maybe he should have a third group: People who are not in the other two groups but don't really have anything in common.
Naruto ruffled his hair violently and rolled over underneath his crappy old blanket. He needed some sleep.
When Chi woke up, Maru was not there. Which must mean that she had gotten up earlier than he did. Which never happened.
Or maybe he had just gotten up late? He looked up to the window. Pale blue light was leaking in through the blinds, though whether it was from the sun or some other source he couldn't say. Chi stuck his face up under the blinds to look outside. The outside world was still gray with early morning light.
He hadn't slept in, then. In fact, it was early even for him. Which meant Maru had indeed woken up early. Which, as previously stated, never happened.
Perhaps the feeling of panic that realization brought on was unwarranted. Perhaps she had just spontaneously woken up early (which she hadn't done since she was a shinobi). Or maybe she had gotten hungry enough to wake up early (even though she'd been eating less and less as the years marched on). Heck, maybe she was actually going to do her own darn errands today (even if the shops were closed this early in the morning). He tried to push his nervousness away.
Instead, he decided to use his head. Well, his nose, really. It wasn't as easy as he would have liked. Maru's scent was everywhere, old crossing new. He followed what he believed was the freshest scent. It led him to the bathroom, but she wasn't there anymore. He didn't smell any iron, though. That was good at the very least.
The next place his chosen scent trail led him was the kitchen. The stove was cool. There were no dishes in the sink. He opened the fridge. If anything was missing, he couldn't tell. Maru didn't let him touch anything in the kitchen excluding the table. You set something on fire one time...
Chi shook his head to clear the thought. Now was not the time to get distracted.
The next place his trail led him to was the backyard. The zen garden hadn't been touched since last night, during Maru and Naruto's argument. The circle around the biggest rock was only half-finished. The sand rake was leaned up against the wall of the house. Chi would have finished the job, but the zen garden was another thing he wasn't allowed to touch. This one he didn't mind, though. It seemed to make Maru a little less prickly. When she wasn't being shouted at by a six-year-old, that is.
The scent trail led him past the kunai targets and into the weapons shed. Soft orange morning light drifted in through the only window, little dust spores dancing through the sharp. Chi imagined that they were happy to see light again, as the shade was always down. So Maru must have been in here (though why she felt the need to let light into a room she couldn't see, he wasn't sure). He looked around at the various weapons on the walls and shelves about him. They were all covered in dust, too with the exception of the kunai he had used to teach Naruto the other day. Everything seemed to be in order except...No, one of the spears on the back wall was missing, he didn't really remember what kind it was.
Suddenly, a section of the floor in the back corner popped up.
"Gah!" Chi shouted, jumping back.
Maru stuck her head up out of the new hole in the floor.
"Morning."
"Morning? Morning! That's all you have to say after scaring the crap out of me?" Chi shouted, attempting to regain his composure.
"Did you sleep well?" She was smirking a little and trying to hide it, damn her.
"You know that's not what I meant!" He shouted at her.
Maru leaned forward and rested her arms on the edge of the hole, "I'm sorry for scaring you."
"...You don't have to sound so sarcastic," Chi muttered to himself. Louder he said, "What are you doing down there?"
"Training," she replied simply, "What else would I be doing in the training room?"
Chi let out a frustrated noise, "I don't know. You just disappeared."
"No, I just got up early."
"And when is the last time you did that, Maru?" If Maru's eyes weren't perpetually covered, Chi would be staring straight into them.
Maru shrugged, "A while ago. Take your blessings when you get them, Chi. At least you didn't have to drag me out of bed this time."
"You could have at least told me..." Chi sighed.
"I did," Maru replied, scratching her cheek. It was red as if something had smacked her. If he had to guess, he'd say one of the training dummies had rolled back after being hit and smacked her right in her big dumb face. Good, she deserved it.
"What? No, you didn't," Chi said.
"Yes, I did. I left the shade up," she said it like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
"How was I supposed to know what that meant?" Chi asked.
"What do you mean how? We agreed that when the shade was up, I was training."
"When did we agree on..." It came back to him suddenly. It was a code that they had created when they'd first moved into this house.
"You forgot, didn't you?" Maru asked, resting her chin in her hand. Even with half of her face covered, Chi could feel the judgment rolling off of her in waves.
"Don't look at me like that! We've never even used it!"
"Well I didn't forget," she replied lightly.
"Well, not all of us have the memory of a cat," Chi replied, hating how sulky he sounded.
"What? Isn't the metaphor 'memory of an elephant'?"
"Cats have really good memories, too," Chi replied. Why he was bothering to tell her this, he didn't know.
"...O-kay," was the only reply Maru seemed to have.
An awkward silence reigned for a moment before Maru abruptly slapped her hands against the floor.
"Well!" Maru breathed brightly, "I'm going back down. I probably won't be back up until this afternoon."
"Wait, you have food, right?" Chi asked before Maru could disappear from his line of sight.
"Of course I do," she replied, turning back towards him, "I wouldn't be able to train very long without food."
Chi gave her a suspicious look.
"You don't believe me," she didn't seem offended, at least, "Okay, fine. Here, look."
She climbed down the ladder. Chi heard some rustling down below and then Maru reappeared.
"Here," She tossed a shopping bag at him.
He looked inside. There was an orange peel and the leafy ends of celery in the bag.
"That was breakfast. I have some onigiri and an apple for lunch," she shook another bag at him but didn't throw it. He could see the outline of items in it, at the very least.
"...Okay."
"I left Naruto's lunch in the fridge. It's right in front, you should be able to see it," Maru said.
"Okay," Chi hesitated, "...You're going to talk to him today, though?"
Maru was silent for a moment.
"It's just...I think it's best not to leave stuff like that for too long. I mean you remember what happened with-"
"I remember," Maru cut him off sharply. She winced at the severity of her tone, so she softened her next words, "Of course I remember. I'll...Just bring him here after school and I'll give him a proper apology. With food and everything."
Chi let out a silent, relieved sigh.
To break the tension, he looked down at the bag she had thrown at him and grabbed the leafy celery end, "I can't believe you didn't eat this."
"Eat what?" Maru asked, cocking her head to the side.
"The leafy bits on the ends of the celery."
"They're bitter," Maru flinched when she heard the crunch that the celery made when he bit into it, "Ugh, did you just eat one of those?"
"Mmhmm," Chi mumbled through a mouthful.
"Ew. Ferrets aren't even supposed to eat vegetables," Maru said, frowning in disgust.
Chi swallowed his first bite, "Well, I'm no normal ferret." He threw the second half of his treasure in his mouth.
Maru made a noise in the back of her throat that might have been a laugh. "Oh, I'm very much aware of that. Anyway, I'm going back to training now. You enjoy your disgusting breakfast." The wood panel made a low thump as Maru pulled it back into place.
Chi smiled as he swallowed. At least she was in a good mood.
Naruto awoke to someone banging on the trapdoor to the attic.
"Naruto! It's time for you to go!" It was one of the personnel at the orphanage. He didn't remember his name. It didn't really matter, anyway.
His headache from last night was still there and all of this shouting and banging wasn't helping. All he wanted to do right now was lay under his crummy blanket and go back to sleep. There was no way anyone was going to get him downstairs.
He shouted as much down to the guy.
There was muffled speech below. Another voice spoke from above.
"Naruto Uzumaki! If you don't come down from there, we'll get Mi-san!" It was a lady this time. Probably another employee. Whatever, they couldn't scare him...Well, they could, but they didn't need to know that.
"Go ahead and get her!" he shouted back.
He turned back over underneath his blanket and pulled his dust-scented pillow over his head. It made him want to sneeze, but the pillow canceled out the noise of people running around below. Comparatively, that was less bad.
He had just started to drift back to sleep when the trapdoor banged open.
Naruto jerked around to see Mana Mi struggling up the ladder to the attic. She was a large woman both about her waist and from head to toe. She had to twist her body in odd positions to fit all of her through the trapdoor. Naruto started to laugh at the sight.
She glared at him as she wrenched her arm through the hole. He decided it would be best to shut his mouth.
Naruto was trying very hard to stand his ground. If he wanted people to respect him, he had to stand by his decisions. The Fourth Hokage had said something like that. Maybe. Or had it been the Second Hokage? Whatever. It was a good line and seemed to fit the situation. Also, it gave him the strength to face the demon woman tugging her rump up through the too-narrow hole in the floor.
He had just begun to think that maybe this wasn't a good idea when Mana Mi put her final foot down on the dusty floorboards. A cloud of dust whipped up around her, but if it bothered her she never showed it. She walked through the dust cloud, her feet making the floorboards rattle. Her long black braid swayed against her back as she walked, reminding him of an angry snake. Her hands were fisted and her arms swung back and forth like those of a particularly determined gorilla as she approached.
Naruto tried to stay put, really he did. But the closer she got, the more nerve he lost.
He managed to stay put until she was about ten steps away. Then he darted away from her. She made to grab for him, but Naruto slipped past. He ran to the trapdoor but stopped short when he looked down.
The two people who had gone to retrieve Mana Mi were staring up at him, those all too familiar cold looks in their eyes. Naruto glanced back at the woman advancing on him. Then he looked back down at the two people below him. He looked back at Mana Mi. Down. Back. Down. Back.
He turned and bolted back towards the brick of a woman behind him. She assumed a pose similar to that of a sumo wrestler, ready to catch the boy. Naruto continued to charge her until the very last second. Then he dropped and slid across the floor right between the Demon Headmistress' legs.
Naruto popped up and made for the window above his bed of blankets. He grabbed a blanket and wrapped it around himself. Then he went crashing through the window. As glass rained down around him, Naruto felt a feeling of triumph...
...Until something caught him by the leg and he crashed face-first into the side of the building.
Hiruzen Sarutobi was an old man. He had no delusions about this. His back hurt when he woke up. His fingers ached in the cold. It took him longer and longer to get up the many stairs leading to his office. Yet none of these things made him dislike his life.
No, that honor went to his job. The paperwork, the constant complaints, dealings with the council-it all had its own draining effect. The worst drain on his already low energy, however, had to be anything that had to do with one Uzumaki Naruto.
Said boy was sitting in front of him, trussed up like a chicken ready for the oven. He was struggling and shouting obscenities that no six-year-old should know and Mana Mi was shouting even more colorful obscenities right back. Something about being disrespectful. Honestly, he wasn't paying attention. Maybe if he didn't talk they'd wear each other out...
"How dare you use such foul language in front of Hokage-sama!"
"Screw you, lady! I bet he's heard worse!"
"You little brat. You need to learn the meaning of respect!"
No, no sitting quietly probably wasn't the best response in this situation. If he didn't intervene it was likely that this situation would end in violence. He cleared his throat to interrupt them.
They ignored him.
"Oh, whatever you fat hag!"
"I am big-boned you little shit!"
Well, it couldn't be helped. He'd just have to yell. Yet another drain on his energy.
"Naruto! Mi-san! You will cease this petty arguing!"
Mana Mi flinched and quieted immediately. Most citizens weren't acclimated to being yelled at by their leaders, thankfully. Naruto, on the other hand...
"It's no wonder you run an orphanage! There's no way anyone would wanna marry someone as ugly as you!"
"Naruto!" Hiruzen tried again. The boy would at least respond to his own name, if not to authority.
"What?" He drew out the a and whined the whole word like a child. Which he was, but that didn't stop it from being irritating.
"Please allow Mi-san to explain why you're here," Hiruzen sighed. He really didn't want to hear what either of them had to say, but the law made it his responsibility to intervene in anything Naruto-related. He really needed to retire soon...
Mana Mi cleared her throat and gave Naruto a side-eye. The boy stuck his tongue out at her.
"Why you-!" Mi began, but Hiruzen cut her off with a sharp look. She didn't look happy, but she finally began her debriefing: "Hokage-sama, this boy is a menace. He is a strain on my staff with his childish pranks and constant troublemaking. We have so many children to care for and he thinks he has the right to all of our attention," she turned her anger on Naruto, "Well, that isn't true, mister! The orphanage has enough problems to deal with without your constant meddling! Especially since-"
"Mi-san," the Hokage interrupted, "I believe this meeting is for my benefit. Please direct your complaints towards me and not the boy in question."
"O-of course, Hokage-sama," Mi replied, snapping her gaze away from Naruto. She cleared her throat again and her respectful tone returned. "This boy has been attempting to undermine this orphanage since before he could walk! From the incident with the wet nurse all the way until just yesterday. Do you know what he did?"
The Hokage picked up the report on his desk to give the illusion he needed to check, but he already knew: "He attempted to escape by jumping through a closed window."
"He jumped through a closed window!" Mana Mi crowed before the Hokage had even finished his sentence. "He completely shattered it! Now we have to pay to get it fixed. Hokage-sama, I'm sure you're aware of the financial state of the orphanage," she didn't wait for the Hokage's response before bowling onward. "Can you tell me how we're supposed to pay for it when there's so much we have to pay for already? Food, clothing, staff, medical care, upkeep, toys to keep the children happy, and now repairs for whenever he-" she jabbed a meaty finger at Naruto- "feels the need to let out his chaotic nature. We can barely keep the normal children in line without him causing problems. And after the war and the attack, there have been so many children without parents. We already have more children than the orphanage was ever meant to handle. Not to mention the understaffing..." Throughout her speech, Mi had become progressively more unraveled and tears were beginning to form in her eyes.
He offered Mana Mi a handkerchief. She thanked him as she took it. The room was silent for a moment while she blew her nose. Naruto was looking at her as if she had grown two heads. Since when did Mana Mi, Demon Headmistress of Konoha Orphanage, ever express any emotion other than fury?
"I'm sorry, this is so unbecoming of me," she sighed, wiping her eyes. Mi took a deep breath and let it back out, seeming to regain her composure. "Forgive me Hokage-sama, I believe the strain of the day is catching up with me."
Hiruzen nodded, quirking his lips up into something akin to a smile, "It's alright, Mi-san, we all have those days."
Mi tried to hide a sniffle, glancing sideways at Naruto to check if he was mocking her. The six-year-old sat there looking confused, but otherwise mock-less.
"Thank you, Hokage-sama. As I was saying, Naruto is a disruptive influence. And it's not just the window. He came home three hours after curfew two nights ago, riding on some sort of giant polecat-"
"He's a ferret, his name is Chi, and he's my friend!" Naruto interrupted defensively.
The Hokage sat up a little straighter at that. A ferret named Chi? Now that was unusual. He only knew of one such creature, and they hardly did anything more than go to the south district market and back home every day. Hiruzen leaned forward on his elbows. Today just kept getting more and more tiring.
"Whatever it was!" Mana Mi interjected before Naruto could steer the conversation off topic. "It was a strange animal around my children. But that's not all!" Mi continued, glaring at Naruto, "After I gave him the reasonable punishment of scrubbing pots for a few days, he assaulted one of my staff!"
"She grabbed me first!" Naruto shouted at Mi, "She yelled at me about how I was being ungrateful and grabbed my arm! So I pushed her off and ran. It's her fault for scaring me..." the last part was mumbled into the collar of his t-shirt.
Hiruzen sighed and massaged his forehead with his hand, "Naruto, please. Continue, Mi-san."
"After that, he disappeared for the rest of the day and didn't come back that night. I didn't see him again until the next evening-After curfew, again! And this morning he wouldn't come down for school, so I had to go up to get him. When I did, well, he jumped out through the window."
Hiruzen sighed and leaned back in his chair, pondering his options. He couldn't let this offense go, of course. Staying out after dark was far too dangerous for someone as young as Naruto, especially taking into consideration who he was. Punishing him harshly would undoubtedly appease Mi-san. However, Naruto wouldn't take that sitting down. The harsher the punishment he got, the more he rebelled. They'd both just be back in his office next week, spitting curses at each other.
There was always the option of putting Naruto in the foster system, but that came with its own problems. First and foremost being Naruto's Jinchuuriki status. The wounds caused by the Nine-tails' release were still fairly fresh and there was no guarantee that the boy wouldn't be mistreated for the association. In fact, he already was. Trapping him with a family that resented him wouldn't help anything. Besides, the foster care system was already strained. As Mi-san had said, the war and the attack had left a lot of children behind. There were more children than there were families able to take them. In the past few years, they'd had to become ever more strict with which children got put into the foster system. Only children who met a specific set of criteria were introduced; well-behaved, no known history of medical issues, good performance in school: model children. Unfortunately, that left many children who were still deserving of a good home in the lurch.
Like the boy sitting in front of him. If Naruto were two years older, he'd be eligible for a limited sort of emancipated minor status. But a future solution didn't help him in the here and now.
Hiruzen massaged his forehead with one hand, he really needed to retire.
"Mi-san, may I speak to Naruto alone?"
Mi looked at Naruto, eyes narrowed and then back to the Hokage. What she expected to see or convey, Hiruzen didn't know. Nor would he, because Mi simply bowed and let the two of them alone.
"Yeah, good ribbons!" Naruto shouted at her back.
Hiruzen resisted the urge to correct him. Pick and choose your battles, Professor.
"Naruto," Hiruzen sighed, getting the boy's attention.
"What? She's a mean old hag and I ha...I don't like her," Naruto slouched in his chair, pouting.
"Naruto, why did you disappear on Mi-san?" He kept his tone even and unjudgemental.
"I told ya already," Naruto replied, pulling at the ropes that kept him in place, "She's mean! Besides, no self-respecting future Hokage would live in a dump like that!"
"You've made your feelings on Mi-san very clear, Naruto. However, that does not excuse the fact that you disappeared without anyone knowing where you were for over 24-hours. We need to know that you're safe, Naruto, and disappearing hardly helps that. This meeting wasn't called to spite you, it was called because we're worried about you."
"Like she cares!" Naruto yelled, wriggling in his seat.
"She does, Naruto. About her orphanage, about the children within it, about her village. She may not show you any love or affection, but know that she does care."
"Whatever," Naruto grumbled, ceasing his struggling. He chose instead to glare moodily to the side.
Hiruzen sat back in his seat and fixed Naruto with a stern gaze, "Now, are you going to tell me where you've been disappearing to the past few days, or do I need to have an Anbu escort you to and from the academy every day for the rest of your time there?"
"Aw man, that would be pretty sweet! I'd have my own Anbu guard just like you do, Jiji!" Naruto grinned at him.
"Not if I had them wake you up at five in the morning and arrive at school two hours early," Hiruzen replied evenly.
Naruto's rejection of the idea was immediate, "But that would be no fun!"
"This isn't about fun, Naruto. This is about your safety."
"I'm perfectly safe with Maru-bachan and Chi!" Naruto pouted.
And there was the other name he needed to confirm his theory. Amekemono Maru and her ferret partner Chi, interacting with the world again after six years of living in obscurity. Interesting.
"And who is this 'Maru-bachan'?"
Naruto perked up at the question, "She's this weird old lady who has a giant ferret named Chi. She's been teaching me how to throw kunai! Oh, she gives me free food, too. She's actually a really good cook, but don't tell her I said that. 'Cuz she's kind of a jerk. Actually, we got in this fight yesterday, and she said something pretty mean. But, I was pretty mean, too." Naruto would have scratched the back of his neck if his arms weren't bound. He almost looked apologetic. At his next words, though, he immediately brightened, "But I'm gonna apologize today and then she's gonna train me some more!" Then he seemed to realize something, "Aw, crap! Chi was supposed to pick me up this morning! Man, he's gonna be so worried! That guy is such a worrywart, y'know?"
Hiruzen regarded Naruto silently, weighing his words. So, Maru had agreed to train someone again? That was unexpected. Although, Naruto was the reigning champion of unexpected. Maybe he shouldn't be so surprised.
"Hey, Jiji, can we hurry this up? I gotta get to class, so Chi can pick me up for training after!"
Naruto wanting to get to class sooner? Now that really was surprising.
"You say this Maru person is training you? How did that happen?"
"Eh? Well, I guess it happened after Chi tried training me by himself. He wasn't very good," Naruto stage-whispered the end of the sentence as if Chi were actually present, "After that Maru-bachan stepped in. She was a way better teacher. But, uh, don't tell her I said that, either." Naruto grinned sheepishly at him.
Of course Naruto had managed to get Maru to train him. Of course he had. The boy took twice as long to learn anything and managed to do new things wrong every time. Hiruzen had heard as much from Naruto's teachers at the academy. There was nothing Maru hated more than sitting by while someone did something incorrectly right in front of her. And Naruto was the king of Doing Things Wrong.
Hiruzen sighed. He tended to do a lot of that around Naruto. "Did it ever occur to you not to accept help from a stranger?"
"Eh? Why not? She wanted to help and she has a ninja ferret!" Naruto said, staring at him wide-eyed.
Fantastic. They needed to have the stranger danger talk...again. But he decided to drop it for now. Maru was many things, but a danger to Naruto she was not.
"Hey, Jiji," Naruto began, breaking Hiruzen out of his thoughts, "Maru-obachan and Chi were shinobi, right?"
"They were, yes. They retired shortly after the attack by the Nine-Tailed Fox."
"Were they, like, a super cool fighting duo or something? Could they form into one giant ferret-human cross? Did they do really super-secret cool stuff?" Then he seemed to come up with something he found twice as interesting as any of that, "Did they help defeat the Nine-Tail's with the Fourth Hokage?"
"Naruto, you know very well that I can't give you that kind of information," Hiruzen said, trying to answer the question as little as possible, "Missions and affiliations must be kept secret in order to protect our village."
"Ugh, but secrets are so boring!" Naruto complained, kicking his legs in displeasure.
"Perhaps," Hiruzen consented, lips twitching slightly, "But they are necessary for the protection of our village and its people. Someday, when you are a shinobi, you may be made privy to some of these secrets."
"Hey, there's no maybe about it, Jiji! I'll know all the secrets, 'cuz I'm gonna be the next Hokage!"
Hiruzen let himself chuckle a bit at that, "Well, you can't be the next Hokage if you fail out of the academy. Let's get you out of here so you can make it to class."
"Aw yeah, finally!"
"After we talk about your punishment, of course."
"Aw, c'mon, Jiji!"
Chi was not freaking out, not at all. Small changes in the schedule were to be expected. After all, a little ball of energy had crashed into his life just a few days ago. Change was only natural after a thing like that. But there were certain expectations he had. Expectations that had to be met to keep life in balance. Naruto disappearing didn't help that. Nor did the half-dozen orphanage employees shooing him away when he tried to ask after the boy.
But he wasn't freaking out. Nope. He was just fine. Maru's little change to the schedule hadn't helped, but it wasn't enough to knock him over. He was a strong ferret. He'd been a shinobi since he and Maru had met! He could handle a little schedule change.
What if Naruto hadn't really been fine after the fight yesterday, though? What if he actually resented Maru for her behavior and was never going to come back. Then things would just go back to him and Maru, alone. In that house. All day, every day. Only going out to do the shopping and then back in again. No one from the old days visited anymore. And now his only connection to the outside world hated them, and-!
Okay, maybe he was freaking out a little bit. Being cooped up with only Maru for company had, perhaps, made him unable to cope with sudden change. A little bit. Maybe.
But this was fine! It was because there were plenty of reasonable explanations that didn't involve him losing his only connection to the outside world. Maybe Naruto had slept in and decided to head to class without him. Of course, that would leave him without lunch, but he was a resilient kid! Maru could make him some extra food for dinner to balance out the missed meal. Or maybe he was sick today and he had decided to stay home so as not to make everyone else sick. Naruto wasn't exactly what you'd call considerate, but he was still a good kid. Although, he didn't really seem the type to stay home for something as petty as a cold. Oh, God. What if he was really sick? What if he had some deadly disease that was slowly eating away at him-
No. No, there was no need to be overly dramatic. Everything was fine. It's fine. Really it's fine. There's nothing wrong. It's fine. Really fine. It's fine. The world wasn't going to end just because he didn't know where Naruto was. It. Was. Fine.
Except it wasn't because Naruto was gone and Chi didn't have any idea where he could be. He didn't have Maru's creepy chakra-sensing ability. He just had his stupid little motley nose and...Wait, his nose. Of course! He could just use scent to track him. Just like he had hundreds of times as a shinobi. Right. He'd forgotten he could do that for a minute there.
It turned out that he didn't need to go far. Naruto was on his way to the Academy from Hokage Tower.
"There you are!" Chi exclaimed when he saw his anchor to the real world. He may have sounded a little more panicked than he wanted to admit.
"Oh, hey Chi," Naruto shouted, walking up to him leisurely (as if he hadn't disappeared for two and a half hours).
"Where have you been!" Chi demanded, his voice somewhere between a squeak and a squawk.
Naruto looked a bit startled by his panic, "Uh, the old man just wanted to talk to me about some orphanage junk. It's not a big deal. I get sent to him all the time."
"You couldn'tve left me a note or something, telling me where you were going?"
"I dunno. Was I supposed to?" Naruto looked confused.
"Yes!" Chi cried, voice rising in pitch, "That's what you do when the schedule changes. You let other people know! You don't just leave without notifying anyone. What happens if something goes wrong and no one knows where you are?"
Naruto just stared at him through his little tirade, looking more and more perplexed by the second. "Uh...?"
Chi was suddenly very aware of the boy's confusion, "Oh! Oh, sorry. Sorry! I'm sorry, I'm...I was just a little worried, Naruto. I didn't mean to yell."
Naruto stared at him for a few seconds more, then gave Chi a face-splitting grin. "Eh, it's alright. Adults are always yelling at me for stuff. First time one's yelled at me out of worry before, though."
Chi felt embarrassed now that he had better control over himself. At least Naruto wasn't upset. But that could have gone over badly, considering how Naruto had reacted to Maru's remark yesterday. He really needed to have better control of himself.
"Well, I'm sorry for overreacting. How 'bout I give you a ride the rest of the way to the Academy?"
Naruto cheered and jumped on Chi's back without hesitation.
He was late again. Of course, Naruto was always late. It never stopped Iruka from worrying, though. As far as he knew, the boy had no one looking after him. Well, aside from the Hokage. But he was one man, and Naruto was one very hard to control boy.
Iruka sighed, attempting to clear his mind. His students were doing a written assignment at the moment, making the room quiet. It wouldn't last for long, unfortunately. Sakura, Shino, and Sasuke had already finished. Thankfully they tended towards sitting quietly, but it was only a matter of time until others finished who weren't so quiet. He needed to worry about the students in front of him, not the ones not present.
And yet...
"Hey everybody!" a boisterous voice shouted, breaking the brief silence. Well, there went everyone's concentration.
"Naruto! Where have you been?" Iruka yelled as he stood from his desk.
"Jiji called me into the office for causin' trouble again," Naruto crowed. He plodded down the steps to stand in front of Iruka. "What's my punishment this time? Detention?" He asked.
Iruka pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. Was he really so predictable? The typical punishment for being late was staying however long you had missed, but Naruto was over two hours late. Iruka had better things to do, like grade papers and ask himself why he decided to become a teacher. He could punish the whole class for Naruto's tardiness, but he knew how that would go over. They'd all get mad at Naruto, which didn't help with his already-bereft social life. There needed to be some kind of punishment, though. Detention it was, then.
"Yes, Naruto, detention. And I'm not going to sit by and let you leave this time!" Iruka plonked his hand down on Naruto's be-goggled head and marched him directly to his seat, "Now sit down and do your worksheet like everyone else." He placed a paper in front of the boy.
Naruto groaned in his Naruto-way but actually did start in on the paper.
"Alright, everyone, show's over. Get back to your assignments," Iruka said as he descended the stairs, "Yes, Shikamaru that means you, too. I can see you trying to nap over there. Do I need to give you detention too?"
Needless to say, he did.
"Aw man, finally!" Naruto shouted. He leaped up from his desk, (remembering to grab his lunch this time) and trotted up the stairs to the place where Shikamaru and Chouji usually sat. "Hey, you guys wanna eat lunch together again?"
Chouji gave him a shy smile and replied, "Sure, I just have to wake Shikamaru up." He poked said sleeping boy on the shoulder. "Shika, hey. It's time to go outside." Shikamaru grumbled about waking up being "troublesome" but relented.
Naruto ran out ahead of them, too excited to wait. Chouji sped up to keep up with his energetic companion. Shikamaru seemed content to trail behind them, hands in his pockets.
Naruto plopped down on the grass enthusiastically. They really were his friends! They didn't mind having lunch with him or anything like that. Plus, they were really nice to him. Well, Chouji was. Shikamaru just seemed to kind of be going along with it. That was more than he could say for anyone else, though.
Chouji sat down next to him and began undoing the ties on his lunch. Naruto watched as the contents were revealed to him: gyoza, apple slices cut to look like bunnies, some clear noodle things in some kind of sauce, and some kind of vegetable mixture.
"What're those?" Naruto asked, pointing at the noodles.
Chouji gave him a confused look, "You've never seen tokoroten before?"
Naruto shook his head, looking down at the clear noodles. They looked a little bit like worms. That thought made him a bit reluctant to continue asking about them. Fortunately (or unfortunately, he wasn't sure) Chouji's disbelief outweighed his interest in his friend's facial expressions.
"You have to try some!" he exclaimed, shoving his bento towards Naruto, "My mom makes them every summer when it's really hot." Naruto reluctantly took a noodle and stared at it, "It's the last batch she's making for the season. It's gonna be fall soon, and then it'll be too cold for it."
Naruto looked down at the noodle and up at his friend. Chouji was staring at him with wide, excited eyes. His mom had made it, after all, it's no surprise that he'd be excited to share. Her tonkatsu had been really good, too. Maybe these wouldn't be too bad. Naruto ate the noodle.
It was surprisingly sour, which he hadn't expected. The texture was kind of weird, too. Like eating a gummy candy, but it wasn't sweet or covered in sugar. In a word, it was-
"Amazing!" Naruto exclaimed, "Can I have another?"
Chouji nodded, grinning back at his food buddy.
"What's amazing?" Shikamaru asked, dropping onto the grass next to them. He'd taken his sweet time getting there.
"My mom made tokoroten," Chouji replied, offering the bento to Shikamaru. To Naruto's surprise, Shikamaru actually snagged a couple noodles.
"Your mom's a really good cook, Chouji!" Naruto declared through a mouthful of noodles.
"Yeah," Chouji replied sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head, "She's the best. What did your mom make you?" He asked, leaning towards Naruto's unopened bento.
Naruto's enthusiasm flagged a bit at the mention of his mother, but then he remembered he had food and his dilemma was quickly forgotten.
"Let's see." He put the simple box in his lap. Maru-bachan hadn't tied it with a fancy cloth like Chouji or Shikamaru's moms did. He removed the lid and peered inside. "Uh...Some fish stuff, rice, vegetable stuff-" he frowned at them as though that would make them disappear- "and an orange."
"Tangerine," Chouji corrected.
"What's the difference?" Naruto asked
"Tangerines are smaller," Chouji said, "and the fish looks like shiojake. The vegetables look like sunomono."
"Shiojake? Sunomono?" Naruto had never heard of these dishes.
"Yeah," Chouji replied, looking just as confused albeit for a different reason, "You've never had either of those before either? You've never had salted salmon for breakfast or pickled cucumbers with dinner?"
Naruto sat back and stared up at the sky in thought, "I dunno, maybe I have had the salmon stuff, but I hate vegetables. I'd never eat cucumbers." Naruto crossed his arms and pouted at the vegetables as if such an action would will them out of existence.
"Can I have them, then?" Chouji asked.
"Sure," Naruto responded, very happy to be rid of them. Besides, he'd eaten a good portion of Chouji's tokoroten. To be even fairer, Naruto also gave him a slice of his salmon stuff (shiojake, Chouji reminded him).
"Oh, man!" Chouji exclaimed through a mouthful of salmon, "This is really good!"
Naruto took a mouthful and, yeah, it really was. Today was just one taste adventure after another. He had no idea food other than old man Ichiraku's ramen could actually taste good. The orphanage had really been holding out on him.
Three empty bento boxes later, the boys all laid on their backs looking at the sky.
"Hey, Naruto, whose weasel was that we met yesterday?" Chouji questioned.
"Oh, Chi isn't anyone's. I mean, he lives with Maru-bachan, but he's not her pet or anything. Actually, I think she's more like his pet. He has to shop for her and clean up after her and stuff," this idea seemed to amuse Naruto very much because he started giggling.
"Is he her contract animal?" Shikamaru asked, his first foray into the conversation since he'd sat down.
"Contract animal?"
"An animal you make a contract with, so that you can summon them in battle," Shikamaru clarified.
Naruto's eyes went wide in wonder, "You can do that?" He exclaimed.
"Is that a no?" Shikamaru asked flatly.
"Eh, I don't think Maru-bachan summoned Chi, he's just kinda there," Naruto responded, scratching his head, "I guess I've never really thought about it."
"Hmph, troublesome," Shikamaru muttered, squinting up at the sky, "Is he a partner in ninjutsu like with the Inuzuka's, then."
"Uh..." Naruto sat up on his arms to look at Shikamaru, "I dunno, I never asked. Why?'S that important?"
Shikamaru just let out a sigh and said: "Nevermind."
"Hey, didn't you get detention, too Shikamaru?" Naruto asked as he flipped onto his stomach.
"Yeah, but it'd be a drag to go," he sighed, "I'm probably gonna skip again."
"Yeah, me too," Naruto added, picking at the grass. Then something seemed to occur to him, "Do your parents get mad at you when you do that?"
"Yes."
"What about you Chouji?" Naruto asked, looking over at his other companion.
"My mom and dad don't get mad, they just give me this really sad look," Chouji replied, a discomfited look on his face. "The last time my dad said he was disappointed by my behavior..."
"Do they, like, punish you or anything?" he asked, feeling a little nervous. He couldn't help but think of how Chi would react if he heard Naruto had skipped out on something as important (to adults) as detention. Or even Maru-bachan's, lord help him.
"My mom tells me to clean the house, but I don't do it. Then she gets mad about that and makes me clean while she watches everything I do. It's such a pain," Shikamaru sighed, the thought alone making him tired.
"My dad usually has me study some old family scrolls for a few hours. They're really boring," Chouji adds, "And then I have to help mom in the kitchen, but I usually do that anyway."
Naruto considered the kind of punishment Maru-bachan would come up with.
They say the imagination can be scarier than reality.
It had been a while since any of the four most detention-prone students had stayed after for their sentence. Now two of them were actually in his class, still sitting down. Well, one of them was. Naruto was sitting there diligently, hands tapping the table in front of him. Shikamaru, on the other hand, was sound asleep. He probably hadn't even noticed his peers leaving. Chouji usually woke him up to go outside, but this time he had glanced over at Naruto and decided not to. Maybe he didn't want Naruto to pay his debt to society all alone. The boy really did have a heart of gold, if his eating habits weren't so disruptive, he wouldn't rack up so much detention. At least he wasn't in there today, so maybe he was actually happening. Iruka could only hope.
"Hey, Iruka-sensei," Naruto called down at him, "How long do I gotta stay here?"
"It's how long do I have to stay here, and that depends on how fast the two of you work. You need to clean the board, sweep the floors and wipe down the desks. As soon as that's done and done well," he stressed, "Then you can leave."
Naruto groaned and banged his head on the desk. Iruka massaged his forehead. There was no way that the two of them would even finish the task. As soon as Shikamaru woke up, he'd be gone. It wouldn't be fair to give Naruto the whole room to clean all by himself, but what else was he supposed to do? He'd given the rest of the class a free pass from cleaning duty for the day.
His thoughts were disrupted by Naruto's enthusiastic shout.
"Okay, then. We'll just have to do it super good and super fast so we can get outta here. Right Shikamaru?" Naruto called over to his friend, waking him up.
"Ugh, troublesome," he mumbled into the arm he'd been using as a pillow.
Iruka was sure that Shikamaru would get up and leave at that point, but instead, the boy stood from the bench and descended the stairs. He grabbed the erasers (the easiest thing to clean) and walked over to the window. Naruto, taking inspiration from his friend, grabbed a bucket from the closet in the corner and started to run to the sink in the hallway.
"Wait a second, Naruto!" Iruka called to him before he could get too far, "I have to come with you to fill that. Which means you have to come with both of us, Shikamaru."
Naruto whined at having been slowed down and Shikamaru grumbled at having to put extra effort into anything. But they were actually cooperating. That never happened. He half expected Naruto to turn around and tell him how he'd totally fallen for it. That their compliance was simply meant to be a prank and then he'd have an eraser dropped on his head. Then they'd run away laughing, having successfully duped their sensei.
But they just kept cooperating. Even when he made Shikamaru go all the way outside to clean the erasers, and not just lean out the window like he had planned to do. Even when Naruto had to scrub every single row of tables and remove all of the graffiti they had accrued over the day. Even when they had to sweep the corners of the room.
Quite frankly, Iruka was confused. Happy with the change in attitude of course, but still confused. Maybe he just shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth...?
That adage proved to be true until the boys were just finishing with packing up the trash.
"Alright, boys, this is the last of it," Iruka replied, watching closely to make sure they tied the knots on the bags properly, "Once you take it out back, you're free to head home."
"Hell yeah!" Naruto shouted, pumping his fist in the air and jumping up and down.
"Hey, loudmouth, try not to jump around so much while I'm tying the bag," Shikamaru griped as he tried to keep his own bag away from his detention-buddy's exuberance. Iruka couldn't help but chuckle at the boys. They really had done well today, heck he was downright prou-
Something out the window caught Naruto's eye. There was a loud bang as the boy dropped the trash bag he'd slung over his shoulder to wave at someone through the window. Iruka turned at the sudden interruption to see...
A giant mink. There was a giant mink at his classroom window. It was waving back at Naruto, too.
"Naruto, why is there a giant mink in the window?" Iruka asked voice strained.
"Eh?" Naruto asked snapping his head towards his teacher, "Whatsa mink sensei? That's Chi," Naruto replied then, seeming to realize that he'd overlooked something, added, "He's actually a ferret. A ninja ferret!" He turned quickly to pick up his trashbag once again, "C'mon Shikamaru! We gotta finish with the trash!" Naruto then proceeded to pick up his bag and go darting out of the room, ignoring Iruka's shouts for him to "stop running" and Shikamaru's tired "troublesome" as they followed the little ball of energy outside.
Chi was a little disappointed if he were being honest with himself. He had told Naruto to let him know where he was so that he wouldn't worry. And yet here he stood, Naruto-less, outside the academy without any explanation as to why his new connection to the world hadn't shown.
It wasn't all terrible, however. The children who had streamed out of the academy right at the bell were very well-behaved when he revealed to them that he could speak. They were polite when they asked him if they could pet his fur (and they gave excellent belly rubs, by the way). They were great company, but he couldn't get rid of that little tiny flea in the back of his mind, whispering that Naruto was not alright. He was lying in a ditch somewhere, cold and alone. Wondering why his dear friend, Chi, wasn't there to save him.
Chi was attempting to ignore the flea when the little Akimichi boy from yesterday came trundling up to him, a bag of chips in his hands.
"Hey, Chi-san!" He chirped, somehow speaking perfectly clearly through a mouthful. He made to pet Chi, realized something, and then wiped his hands on his jacket. Chi might have cringed slightly, but he let the boy pet him anyway.
"Hey, Akimichi kid!" he let his head lower back to the ground as the bliss of belly rubs washed over him. Naruto? Naruto who? That little flea could just keep its mouth shut.
"It's Chouji. Akimichi Chouji," the boy replied as he stepped away from Chi.
Chi made what he would swear wasn't a whine (but totally was) "Aw, what are you stopping for?"
"Oh, my mom's already here to pick me up," the boy replied, gesturing to a brown-haired woman who was waving at them, "I just came over to pet you and give you Naruto's message."
"Message?" Chi asked, pulling himself up into a sitting position. Here it was, the terrible thing he'd been waiting for.
"He said he'd be late because he has detention with Iruka-sensei. He doesn't know how long he'll be, but he said you get worried easily. He thought it'd help if I came over to tell you. I wouldn't worry too much though, Iruka-sensei only put them on clean-up duty instead of making them stay as much time as they skipped."
Oh. That was...not nearly as terrible as he had thought it would be. Well, detention was bad, but it wasn't dead bad. Small victories, he supposed.
"Oh! Well, thank you for telling me!" Chi chirped, hoping his voice didn't sound too shaky. All that worrying for nothing. Naruto had even listened to his worries about his lateness and had adapted to his request. It was surprising, to say the least. Maybe it shouldn't have been, but he'd been living with no one but the queen of unaccommodating for the past three years.
"No problem," Chouji replied, waving back to Chi as he ran backwards towards his mother. The boy nearly tripped over a rock in doing so. Deciding this way was too a bit too risky for his liking, Chouji flipped himself around and trotted more steadily toward his mother.
'Cute kid,' Chi thought to himself, 'Naruto has a good eye for friends.'
He let out a sigh through his nose and picked himself up off the ground. There wasn't really much else he could do but wait. Maybe he could score some pats off of the kids that didn't leave as early.
Suddenly, he got the distinct impression that there were eyes on him. He turned around and spotted a little pair of lilac eyes watching him. Ah, so she was a Hyuuga, then. Upon realizing she had been caught, the girl blushed and retreated behind the tree she had been hiding behind.
"Hi there," Chi called, waving a paw at her.
The girl didn't move for a moment, continuing to hide out behind her tree. Then she peeked out again to check if he was still watching. He was, so she blushed again and went right back to hiding.
Chi sat patiently for a while, watching her repeat this peek/hide routine she had going on. She was young enough that it was still cute instead of creepy.
Finally, the girl seemed to realize that she wasn't really fooling him at all; he had seen her and she was either going to have to run away or approach him. Although he supposed she could just keep hiding until he left, but that would be a while. Thankfully she decided on the approach option.
It was a shaky and hesitant approach. It seemed to Chi that the girl was painfully shy. She kept tapping her index fingers together and staring at her shoes. It took her an entire minute just to shuffle over to him.
It took her another minute to even speak, "U-um."
"Yes?" Chi prompted, keeping his voice as gentle as possible.
"Y-you..." she seemed to struggle to get her words out. A stutterer if he wasn't mistaken.
"Take your time, I'm in no rush," Chi said gently. The girl looked up at him briefly but quickly snapped her eyes back down to her fidgeting fingers.
"Th...th-ank you," she whispered. A silence ensued wherein the girl began playing with the hem of her jacket. "Y...you...I saw- Naruto-kun is a friend?" Again, she glanced up at him.
"Uh, I don't know, is he your friend?" Chi asked. How was he supposed to know if Naruto was friends with this girl?
Frustration quickly flashed across her face only to be replaced by shame. Suddenly Chi realized what she had meant.
"Oh! You're asking if Naruto and I are friends!" The girl gave him a relieved nod, her shoulders relaxing a bit. "Well, I suppose you'd have to ask him to make it official. But, from my perspective, yes. Naruto and I are friends. Why?"
Her fidgeting got worse as she considered his question. Her cheeks were turning red again and she began digging at the dirt with a foot.
"I noticed he's been bringing food to school lately," she answered, her voice catching on the word "school".
"Yeah, my friend Maru makes them for him. Since you noticed that, I bet you noticed that I was the one bringing him to school these past few days, too. You're very observant, Hyuuga-chan." The girl blushed even deeper. "Why do you ask?"
"I just wanted to know if," she paused to take a shaky breath, "if he's been adopted?"
Chi let the words wash over him as he considered them. It had never really occurred to him to consider adopting Naruto. He'd only known the boy for a few days, after all. That was hardly a solid basis for a parent-child relationship. And yet, he adored the boy, even in this short time. Maybe it was because Naruto reminded Chi of the people he and Maru had once cared about deeply, or maybe it was just his innate charm. Probably both. He certainly wouldn't mind having the little ball of sunshine around permanently, Maru be damned. He wondered how messy the bureaucracy surrounding a ferret adopting a demon-container would be. Very, he guessed.
"No, unfortunately," the girl's shoulders drooped, "But, hey! He's got great people like the two of us looking out for him, so it can't be too bad."
The girl's face was practically glowing red at this point, "I-I-I!" Her words seemed to be stuck in the back of her throat.
"Whoah there, Hyuuga-chan. It's alright. I didn't mean to fluster you so badly. Let's backpedal a bit, hm?" he suggested, "Let's do some introductions. I'm Chi, the fabulous ferret. And you are?"
Her blush faded a bit, but her fidgeting didn't stop, "Hyuuga Hinata."
"Oh, you're the little Hyuuga princess," Chi exclaimed, feeling a little silly for not realizing it earlier. Hyuuga Hiashi had had a little daughter almost six years ago now and as far as he knew she was the only little Hyuuga girl currently attending the academy.
Hinata nodded but didn't answer, still finding her shoes remarkably interesting.
"Well, it's lovely to meet you Hinata-hime," Chi said, giving her best bow he could.
And the blush was back and redder than ever. Hinata looked like she was either going to either pass out or run away. Chi was about to (attempt to) disarm her with his charm, but it seems that she had taken the "run away" option.
Hinata was about halfway across the courtyard when she abruptly about-faced, shouted "Itwasnicemeetingyou!" wheeled back around, and ran straight out of the gates.
'Well,' Chi thought, slightly bewildered, 'at least it killed some time.'
He decided he'd go check on Naruto before he met anyone else. If he remembered correctly, all of the classrooms here had big windows that he could peek in through. Naruto was bound to be in one of them.
Staying behind was such a drag, but he didn't want to leave the idiot he'd managed to make friends with alone to deal with cleaning an entire classroom. Great, good for him. Now he was tired from cleaning and annoyed by the boy's shouting. If there was one thing Shikamaru hated more than being tired without being allowed to sleep, it was being annoyed by loud noises.
Naruto was very good at making loud noises.
The current cause of said loud noise was the presence of the weird weasel-thing he and Chouji had met the other day.
Iruka-sensei hadn't reacted particularly well to the thing's presence and was demanding that Naruto allow him to meet the strange creature. Something about safety or something. It didn't really matter. All Shikamaru wanted to do was sleep. But he couldn't do that until the classroom was clean, which meant he'd have to take out the trash, which meant he needed Iruka-sensei to go with him, which he couldn't do while Iruka was yelling at Naruto. How troublesome.
"-solutely not! I'm not letting you go home with that thing until I know it's safe. Honestly, Naruto how could you be so-"
Shikamaru stopped listening again. They were standing in the hallway outside the classroom where Iruka had grabbed Naruto to keep him from going outside. Something about stranger danger. Although, it seemed like a pretty silly plan to send something so conspicuous as a giant ferret to kidnap a child. Besides, his dad had told him that there was always a handful of ANBU guards stationed around the place to take care of any threats. If someone really wanted to kidnap a kid they'd have to go to a lot more trouble than that.
"-prove it! Tell him Shikamaru!" Naruto shouting his name pulled Shimaru back out of his thoughts.
"What am I proving?" He asked, shifting his trashbag from one shoulder to another.
"That Chi's a good guy," Naruto responded, glaring at Iruka-sensei.
Chi? Who was-? Oh, right, the weasel. "He seemed fine to me," Shikamaru said, "My dad new 'im and stuff, so I guess he's alright. Something about his summoner working with him during the war?" Honestly, this was way too much of a hassle, but he needed to answer so that he could just go home, already.
"Would your father vouch for it, Shikamaru?" Iruka-sensei asked, giving his student his best "stern teacher" look.
"Yeah, sure," Shikamaru sighed, only half-listening. At this rate, it'd be dark before he got home. Then he wouldn't get to watch clouds at all. Not that his mom would let him. This was the second time this week he'd gotten detention. She was probably sitting at the kitchen table right now dreaming up creative punishments for him. What would it be this time? Cleaning the whole house? Making him organize her recipe cards? Forcing him and his dad to train together? Well, she only rolled that one out when she was mad at both of them, but he wouldn't put it past her.
Suddenly Naruto shouted and pumped his fist in the air. He made to take off towards the exit, but Iruka grabbed his shoulder.
"Wait a minute, Naruto! You and Shikamaru need to throw that stuff in the dumpster out back before you can leave."
Naruto's momentum didn't seem to disappear, though. He simply flipped around towards the back entrance, grabbed Shikamaru's bag from him, and took off towards the dumpsters. Shikamaru simply blinked after his blonde companion, then turned to his teacher.
"Can I go now, Iruka-sensei?"
Iruka looked a bit annoyed, at him or Naruto or both of them, he wasn't sure. Whatever, it didn't matter. Because Iruka said:
"Yes, Shikamaru, you may go."
Shikamaru simply turned on his heel and began trudging towards the exit. Behind him, he could here Iruka-sensei let out an exhausted sigh. Maybe after this whole ordeal, the teacher would finally stop sentencing them to detention and just let it go. Yeah, and maybe his mom would let him sleep in on a school day.
When he exited the building, he saw the weasel-thing back out front.
"Afternoon, Shikamaru-chan!" it chirped. Shikamaru tried not to look annoyed at the cutesy nickname. He was going to be seven in a few weeks. He was too old for this "-chan" business.
Naruto burst out of the exit right behind him, nearly hitting Shikamaru with the door.
"Chi!" Naruto shouted as he hug-tackled the creature.
Shikamaru watched the ensuing squabble with a detached sort of amusement. It wasn't every day you saw one of your classmates wrestle a giant rodent.
Though it did get old eventually. Shikamaru made his way around the two, planning on leaving before either of them noticed, but it wasn't meant to be. Naruto caught sight of him before he was even a quarter of the way away.
"Hey! Where are you going, Shikamaru? Don't you want a ride home?" The blonde boy called to him.
Shikamaru didn't particularly want to spend even more time with Naruto today. He liked the guy well enough, but he was absolutely exhausting to be around for any length of time. So he wanted to say no...
But then he considered the fact that getting home sooner, would mean his mom would be slightly less angry. It also would mean that he'd be able to watch clouds as soon as he snuck away from her...
Shikamaru shrugged, "Eh, why not."
They were at the Nara compound in less time then he expected. Maybe there was something to this whole weasel-travel thing.
"You can just drop me here," he told the weasel, but it kept going.
"Nah, it's okay," the weasel replied, "I remember how to get there."
"Eh? You've been here before, Chi-chan?" Naruto asked, probably a little too loudly considering the wince Chi gave.
"Yeah, Maru and I used to live here," the weasel replied.
"Oh yeah, she was married to Shikamaru's dad's brother," Naruto recalled, still too loudly for their furry chauffer's ears.
"Uncle, Naruto. The word you're trying for is uncle," Shikamaru replied. How did he not even know such a simple word? Honestly, he was so annoying.
"Yeah, yeah," Naruto waved a hand back at his companion, "So she was, like, kinda related to you, yeah?"
Shikamaru sighed, "That would make her my aunt, yes." He didn't particularly care who the woman was, she wasn't particularly active in his life. He hadn't even heard of her until the other day and when he'd asked his dad about it, all he'd gotten was a brush off. Whatever, it didn't matter. He didn't need to make his life harder by adding extra complications like a secret family member he'd never been told about.
He realized Naruto had been talking only after the boy bopped him on the head with a fist.
"What?" he grumbled, rubbing the spot where Naruto had hit him. It was an action borne more out of indignation than pain.
"I told you, already, lazy! We're here," the blonde gestured to the building in front of him.
Shikamaru grumbled as he slid off of the weasel's back, hoping that Naruto's shouting wouldn't alert his mother to his presence. If he could just sneak away before she-
"Shikamaru? Is that you?"
Crap.
Nara Yoshino slapped open of the shoji to their home. She looked mad, but she was always mad. What mattered to Shikamaru was how mad she was today.
To his surprise, the anger faded from her face and transformed into a look of pure astonishment.
"Chi?" she breathed, nearly dropping the dish she'd been drying beforehand.
A/N: Hey, I'm not dead. Neither is this fic, thankfully. I've left y'all with a particularly long chapter as an apology. This first handful of chapters are going to be pretty slow, but I will essentially be completely re-writing the entirety of both Naruto and Shippuden, so...Criminy this is going to be a long series.