Dog Days

(Tuesday, August 3, 2016)

17: Mopping Up

With all his weapons re-charged, Ford kept watch at the effigy while Stan and Wendy took the twins and Tripper back to the Shack—Wendy driving them in the golf cart, Stan hustling along behind. Dipper and Mabel were groggy and unfocused, Tripper alive but in distress, gasping and wheezing, his eyelids swelling.

Wendy got them into the Green Machine just as Stan came panting up. "Called ahead," he gasped, waving his phone. "Blubs kept people from comin' into the valley, didn't evacuate. Doc Setter is in. First him, then the clinic." He climbed into the back seat with Mabel and Tripper. "Gun it!"

At the vet's, Stan yelled until Setter's receptionist came out and pointed them to the barn. "He's in there!"

Stan lugged Tripper in. Dipper staggered along behind him. Doc Setter was just coming out of a stall, wiping his hands on a towel. "What's wrong?"

"Sick dog!" Stan said. "Got stung. Here, help him!"

"Epin—ep—adrenaline!" Dipper gasped. "Help his breathing."

"I think you're right," the doctor said. "Bring him into the examining room in the house and I'll take care of him."

Stan said, "Dip, you go with Wendy to the clinic. I'll stay with the dog." He clenched his teeth. "And, uh. And. And I'll-pay-the-bill!"

Wendy had to help Dipper walk straight. "Dude, how'd you know that about the adrenaline?"

"Didn't," Dipper said. "Bill tipped me off, I think. Inside me. Told me. Whoa, I think I'm gonna—" he slumped, unconscious.

Wendy tore up the street racing to the clinic. By then Dipper had come around and could more or less walk, but Wendy carried Mabel inside. "Hey, doc!" she yelled as she banged through the front door. "Got a couple emergencies!"

Dr. La Fievre and his nurse Yvonne hurried both twins into an examining room. He checked their pulse rates, blood pressure, pupil responses, and then looked into their mouths. "Huh," he said. "This hit suddenly?

"Yeah," Wendy said, worriedly. "Like all at once, boosh. One of those Gravity Falls things."

The young doctor nodded. He'd been in Gravity Falls long enough to learn about some of the unique maladies of the little town that reality forgot. "They both have a degree of anemia," he said. "Look." He pressed Mabel's thumbnail. "See how pale the nail bed is? I know this isn't chronic. I want a CBC. They're both O positive. I think we'll try a blood transfusion initially. That should resolve the symptoms temporarily. I don't see any obvious markers of internal hemorrhage—"

"It's not that," Wendy said. "Like I said—something paranormal. Something Gravity Falls."

The doctor nodded. "Well, it's serious, but not grave. Let me get them prepped, get them on oxygen, and then we'll go on from there. Please wait in the waiting room. I'll let you know something soon as possible."

"Don't keep me hanging," Wendy warned him.

"No, of course not."

While she fretted, Wendy got a call from Soos—he and the family had just returned to the valley, summoned back by Ford. "We're gonna delay opening until sometime this afternoon," he said. "Those government guys in the black suits? About six of 'em are gonna be there, using the Shack as a temporary command post, I guess? Anyway, you'll see them, so don't like freak out when you come back. Dipper and Mabel OK?"

"I think they will be," Wendy said cautiously. "Doctor's checking them out right now."

Soos hesitated and then said, "Uh, the dog kinda got away from me. My bad. Any sign of him?"

"Oh, yeah, he came and found us and got a little hurt. The vet's working on him," Wendy said.

She heard Soos groan faintly. Then, in a guilty-sounding voice, he added, "I hope he'll be, like, all right."

Half an hour later, a pale Teek showed up in the waiting room. "Where's Mabel?"

"Doctor's with her right now," Wendy said.

He settled onto one of the waiting-room chairs. "What happened?"

"Oh, man," Wendy said. "It's hard to believe." But she told Teek as much as she thought he needed to know, and just before she wound up the story, the doctor came in.

"They'll be all right," he said. "Really strange. No sign of hemorrhage or organic cause. It's sort of like they made a blood donation and overdid it. They've perked back up. I'm going to give them a couple of prescriptions, just in case, and I want them to get plenty of bed rest for the next forty-eight hours. Have them check in with me again on Friday morning, just to be sure nothing weird's going on."

Teek jumped up. "Can I see her? Them, I mean?"

"They're getting dressed," the doctor said. "They'll be out in a minute. Remember, bed rest and get those prescriptions filled. Have them drink lots of fluids. I'm giving them each an iron supplement, but they won't need to take that for more than a week if their levels begin to come back up. Oh, and pick up a diet list for anemia patients. Yvonne will have one."

"Gotcha," Wendy said.

"Get the prescriptions from Yvonne," the doctor said. "Tell Stanford I'll send a bill."

"Teek?" The door opened, and Mabel, still looking weak, emerged and jumped Teek. "You came to see me!"

"Well, yeah!" Teek said as she kissed his face.

Dipper emerged and puffed out his cheeks. "That was not fun," he told Wendy.

Wendy, looking much more herself, said, "Teek, you drive Mabes over to the Shack. Dip and I will follow up on their dog," Wendy said. "You feel up to that, Dipper?"

Dipper nodded. "I got a pint of blood," he said in a voice shaky with wonder. His color was much better, and his gait was steady, but he put one bandaged arm around Wendy's waist and sort of leaned on her.

"Hey, Dip," Mabel called from where Teek had just opened the passenger door of his car for her, "You phone me as soon as—as soon."

"Sure, Sis," Dipper said.

In the Dodge Dart, he fumbled with the seat belt. "Feel kind of out of it," he mumbled. "Are you OK?"

"Yeah, fine," Wendy said. She clicked his belt for him and then started the engine. "I hate to say it, but Bill Cipher saved our butts back there. What flipped him, man?"

"I think the Axolotl did," Dipper said. "Uh, Wendy? I don't think we'll ever see Bill Cipher as the triangle guy again. I think from now on—he's only going to be human. Billy Sheaffer. Oh, God, I ought to—" He pulled out his phone and dialed.

In a few seconds, he said, "Mrs. Sheaffer? This is Dipper Pines, from down the street, you know—yeah, hi. Listen, I talked to Billy recently and he seemed a little sick. How is—oh, he is? Well, yeah, if he feels like it. OK."

He said to Wendy, "She says he's awake and just had something to eat. She's taking the phone up to him."

"Dipper?"

"Hey, Billy. How's it going?"

"Uh. I guess OK?" Then Billy lowered his voice: "Dipper—was I really with you? Did I really fight monsters and help with your dog? Mom says I was dreaming, but it seemed so real. And I feel so—like I'm two people. Or was. Am I crazy?"

"No," Dipper said. "You're not crazy. Look, Billy, I'm going to tell you some things when Mabel and I get back to Piedmont, OK? And they're gonna sound really weird, but you can handle it, man. So hang in there until our birthdays."

After a long, reluctant pause, Billy said, "OK."

It was a very strange coincidence, but his eleventh birthday and their seventeenth birthdays fell on the same date—August 31.

Before he hung up, Dipper said, "Billy—hang on to this, now: you did good, man. I don't mean you did well. I'm saying you really did good."

"Thanks, Dipper."

At the vet's, Stan brought Tripper out to the car, still carrying him. "He's gonna be OK," he said. "He's gotta wear this lampshade thing around his head. The doc stitched up that sting. He said it musta been one hell of a wasp, don't tell Sheila I said hell, and I told him it was a Gravity Falls hornet. He's got an ointment for where his mouth got burned and some pills to take, but he's gonna be OK."

Dipper had turned around in the front seat. Tripper was on the back seat beside Stan, looking reasonably whole, though he did wear the collar of shame and had a shaved patch on his side and a small wound with three or four stitches in it.

"We're going to see Mabel," Dipper told Tripper. "Will you be happy to see her?"

Tripper raised his right paw and—Dipper could have sworn—winked at him.

Dipper smiled back and made the call that Mabel had requested.

"Agent Trigger is in charge of the mop-up squad," Ford told them in the Shack parlor. "But the readings are all within normal variance for Gravity Falls now. I'm reasonably certain that whatever Bill did blocked the potential leakage from the Nightmare Realm. The gold bugs aren't even showing up."

"Good news. So ya gonna dynamite the statue?" Stan asked.

Ford frowned. "I . . . think not. It should be inert now, but . . . well, let's try to check. Dipper, are you in contact with Bill Cipher in any way?"

"Don't know," Dipper said. "It just, you know, comes and goes."

"Would you mind going into the Mindscape and seeing if he's there? I need to talk to him if he is."

"Man, don't make Dip do that!" Wendy said, taking Dipper's hand.

"No, it's all right," Dipper said. "I'm not afraid of Bill. I don't think he'd hurt me. I think now . . . now I can trust him."

Mabel, lying on the sofa with Tripper on her stomach, asked, "Hey, Tripper, you think Brobro should try to talk to the weird triangle guy?"

The dog raised his right front paw.

"Survey says go for it!" Mabel announced, hugging the dog. "Oh, I love you so much!"

So Ford turned out the lights, Wendy sat holding Dipper's hand, and he used autohypnosis to dive down into the Mindscape, that monochromatic, distorted realm of dreams good and bad.

"Bill?" he asked in a black-and-white, off-kilter version of the parlor. He seemed to be alone at first.

And then a form shimmered into view and a strangely subdued voice answered him: "Here, Pine Tree. Glad to see you survived the operation I performed."

"Yeah, thanks for that. What did you do?"

"Saved the nice little doggy. But I had to take some of your life energy and some of Mabel's to kick-start him. It's OK, you meat bags regenerate. Just takes a little time. What's the occasion for the visit?"

Dipper had been wrong in doubting that Cipher would manifest as his old self. He saw a shadowy, transparent form of the triangle guy. But then, Dipper had meant they'd never see him in daylight again, not in the real world, not as a triangle with a top hat and bow tie. "My Great-Uncle Ford wants to ask you some questions."

"Old Fordsy. Nosy Fordsy."

"Will you talk to him?"

After a pause, Bill countered, "Will you be the telephone?"

OK, it involved a kind of possession. Or at least mind-share. But Dipper had said he could trust Cipher, so—

"Do it," Dipper said before going to sleep.

Stanford jumped a little when Dipper opened his eyes—normal pupils, though—and said in a close approximation of Bill's voice, "Yello? This thing on? Wave if you can't hear me! Hiya, Sixer! How's the weirdness count around that handsome statue?"

"It's . . . well within normal range," Ford said. "Am I speaking to Bill Cipher?"

"Yeah, but so far it's been a really boring conversation, Fordsy. Hiya, Red! The Dipster's a lucky guy, you know? OK, Fordsy, I can't hold onto this instrument for very long, so quick now, what do you want to know?"

"Are your—friends—truly out of our dimension now?"

"Sixer," the Cipher voice said in a taunting, teasing way, "since when did I have friends?" He gave his insane laugh, then said, "Tell ya what, let's call 'em fiends. Show a little disrespect! And the answer is, none of them are in this or any nearby parallel universe. They've all gone home. I sent 'em to bed without their super."

"Supper," Stan automatically corrected.

Dipper cackled again in Bill's voice. "Super as in powers, Stanley! In their own realms, they got no magic of their own. In other words, they can't come back. You're looking well, Stanley. How's that old right hook?"

"Trust me, you don't wanna find out," Stan growled.

"Please, focus," Ford said urgently. "Bill, tell me: will you swear—by—by the Axolotl—that all of the, ah, fiends are back in their own dimensions?"

Dipper raised his right hand. "I do. They can't return to here or the Nightmare Realm on their own. That's the truth. And I don't know if old Frilly judges that a good thing or a bad thing. This whole morality mess is so confusing!" He waggled his hand. "Hey, cool, lookit, five whole fingers! Way to go, Dipper! You grew a pair! Of pinkies! Ah-ha-ha-ha!"

"Bipper?" Mabel asked in a small voice.

Dipper's body stopped wiggling its fingers. A big grin spread over his face. "Oh, I remember that old pet name! Shooting Star. Don't think I've forgotten being tickled, either. Or hit in the face with kittens! Ooh, and how you decorated your prison bubble. You're a really warped girl. That's what I love about you."

"Thanks for saving Tripper," she said softly. "And that was definitely a good thing."

"Aw. I—I don't know what to say. Wow, gang, a first! Oops, I'm losing contact—real quick, they're gone, Gravity Falls is safe from them, but there's a lot of other bizarre junk round here, so stay on your toes, and buy goooooooollllld."

Dipper slumped, then straightened, flailing his arms. "Waugghh!"

"Easy man," Wendy said, hugging him.

"Whoa," Dipper said, blinking. "That—I felt like—that was—did I do it? Did he come through?"

"Yeah, in spades," Grunkle Stan said sourly. "Trust him if you wanna. Me, I'll never forgive him for messin' with the family."

Soos returned and they opened the Shack for business and got a few dozen tourists, not as many as usual. Three of the black-suited Agency guys came in, looked around, bought a few souvenirs, and one of them tried to talk Wendy into going out with him. He got nowhere.

Dipper, Mabel, and Tripper were stashed in the attic, where it was quiet. Dipper and Mabel ate what the doctor recommended, drank lots of liquids, and dozed on and off. When they woke and got bored, they played board games on the floor, with Tripper looking on intelligently.

"This is like we're twelve again," Dipper said.

"Feels nice, Brobro," Mabel replied. "B-five. Hah! King me!"

"Mabel," Dipper said, "we're playing Battleship."

All through the afternoon, Wendy and Teek kept popping in to see if they needed or wanted anything. "Smooches would be nice," Mabel told Teek. He gave her a few as Dipper discreetly put the board games away and didn't look.

That evening, as a smiling Mabel slept with her arms around Tripper, Dipper felt well enough to go downstairs and see Wendy off. "Gonna go back to a mess," she said with a sigh. "Dad and the boys cooked their own breakfast this morning. I'll be up until midnight cleaning. Casa Catastrophe, man."

"I could go along and help," Dipper suggested.

"Nope," Wendy said firmly. She grinned. "Doctor's orders are that you go rest, so do it, man. I want you to get your full strength back quick. There's still some summer left, and you're really gonna need it."

"Need it for what?" he asked her with a smile.

She took him in her arms and showed him.

The End