A/N: So it turns out one gets really busy when moving around the holidays between all the moving things and the dealing with the family and whatnot. Apologies this chapter was so delayed. I shall endeavor to get the final two chapters up more quickly...

The Nanny = not mine, because it never is.

The ride from Dunburn Manor to the train station passed in a blur. Niles had not said much about what occurred inside the house while CC had been on her constitutional with Lord Henley. He briefly filled in what he discovered in regard to the scheme Gareth and Marie took part in. CC had to commend their gumption. After witnessing firsthand the snobbery of the money set and their adherence to old family ties in their part of the world, CC felt some small amount of sympathy toward the couple. She also felt some small amount of guilt having taken part in similar behavior back home in New York. For the first time, CC paid attention to her own reflection.

'Am I that awful?' she said aloud as she realized the differences between her and the people they had been dealing with at the benefit were not drastic.

'Hmm?' Niles vocalized next to her. He had been looking out the window, taking in the English countryside while he could. Their train moved swiftly along, making the occasional stop to pick up or drop of passengers at each station.

'What?' she asked.

'How awful are you, CC? And are you that awful?'

'Niles,' she scolded, somehow making his name an extra syllable in the process of speaking it.

'You asked 'Am I that awful?' and I am trying to determine a scale of awfulness so that I can tell you where you fall.' He looked at her as if she had gone daft. They had most of the train car to themselves which suited CC just fine. Niles moved to sit directly across from her so he could attempt to get a read on what she was feeling. He had learned a fair bit over the last week and was worried she would revert entirely to the person she was before the trip. 'I don't see any new growths, so either you are hiding your horns under your wig or you're not as awful as you think.'

'Thank you,' CC said. 'I think.' She frowned as she pushed the hair that fell into her face back behind her ear. She didn't feel any horns. 'I was thinking about Gareth and Marie putting up with those people and their judgments every time they go to an event.'

'You're not one of those people, CC,' Niles said. He took her hand in his. 'No one is on that level in your social circle regardless of how aspiring they may be.'

Not able to hold his gaze, CC looked over Niles' shoulder. 'The things they said, Niles…'

'I know. As servants – Gareth and Marie, myself – we learn to ignore the worst. If we don't brush it off, we end up bitter and dead at a young age.' His right hand reached up as he spoke. He cupped her cheek. CC leaned into his touch. He caught her eye again. 'You're not that awful to me,' he said, letting the statement rest between them as he dropped his hand and leaned back.

CC let out a sigh, though whether it was out of frustration or some other emotion, Niles could not be certain. 'Do you regret agreeing to do this – coming to England and posing as my husband?' she asked.

'No,' Niles said. 'I don't regret being here with you.' He moved to sit next to her again. 'There is something else.' She heard the nervousness in his voice, but said nothing as she waited for him to voice his thoughts.

'With your permission, CC, before we return to our normal lives, I would like to kiss you as a husband might kiss his wife.'

The words lingered between them as she thought them over. After what must have felt like an eternity to Niles (because it felt like an eternity to CC), she said, 'I would like that.' She spoke in a whisper, as if afraid everything would fall apart if she spoke too loudly.

Niles reached for her again, this time with his left hand. The warmth of his closeness spread from her cheek down through her chest and into her stomach. He swallowed hard as he slowly closed the gap between them. She licked her lips and saw him do the same through partially closed eyes. He hesitated a moment, just long enough to tell her it was okay to pull away if she had changed her mind. CC waited for Niles.

The feel of his lips on hers was moist and warm, gentle yet harboring something deeper. She applied enough pressure to be a full participant but something else was happening inside CC that held her back the slightest bit. Niles did not seem to notice or was dealing with his own inner turmoil. As he pulled back slightly, she realized her left hand clutched his shirt. CC released her grasp. Niles swallowed hard again as he slowly put distance between them.

Speaking barely above a whisper CC said,' Thank you, Niles. That was … thank you.' Somehow, despite the raging torrent of emotions, she kept her voice steady.

'Yes, I, thank you, CC,' Niles said. His voice was slightly strangled, almost distant.

They turned away from each other. The train slowed and pulled into another station to take on new passengers and leave others. Someone took one of the seats near them.

It took all CC had not to break, to hold on until the safety of the hotel room that was still nearly an hour away. CC had felt the carefully constructed protective shell around her heart weaken and crack over the last week. Kissing Niles shattered the damaged shell into a million pieces she could never put back together. She was a Babcock. Babcocks did not show weakness, and they certainly did not fall in love with servants.

Somehow she held on, even with the man who owned her heart so physically close she could touch him. But he was still so far from her in other ways, most of those reasons caused by her own biases and actions.

Niles was faring no better. The whole trip he had wanted to lay some claim on CC Babcock. They had come a long way in the last week, but doubt crept in at the worst time. Would she regret her actions? He could not ask. He did not want to know. Then there was the question of what their lives would resemble when they returned to New York City from the English haze. Routine was a hard habit to break. Some part of Niles had wanted CC to reject the request, to set a solid boundary. CC had agreed, though. Hope was a horrid thing when at its highest, especially mixed with the extreme uncertainty Niles felt after the kiss.

They barely said two sentences to each other for the rest of the train trip and the ride in the taxi to the hotel. Niles took care of the bags when the time came. CC took care of the taxi and the hotel arrangements. Separate rooms. They could not be further apart despite having never been closer just hours previous.

The moment CC closed the door of her room, she put her back to the painted wood, sunk to the floor, and released the flood of emotions she had dammed for the last hour or so. Maxwell could never have caused her heart to ache this way, but he was never her main interest. He was the one that looked good on paper. Niles had always been the one to thrill CC and match wits with her; Niles was the one she wanted to see and be with every day.

After a time she moved to the shower. She could not tell if she was crying as the water cascaded over her, first hot then cold. Somewhere not too far away, Niles unknowingly mirrored CC's actions.

:p:P:p:P:p:P

CC lingered over breakfast in the morning. Their flight was not due to depart until early afternoon, so she ordered room service. Somehow, despite feeling mildly nauseated, she managed to get down toast, eggs, and coffee. She had no idea Niles had forced himself to the dining room for his own morning meal well before she ordered hers. Unlike her, he felt a need to see other people, even if they were strangers. Niles hated being alone all the time, something he never told anyone or let on. Waking up with Babcock had been pleasant, not least because he was attracted to her. He had reveled in the fact he did not need to wake up alone yet again. But the last few mornings had been a reminder of the world he was returning to. Why had he kissed her? Niles felt certain he had ruined things between them.

They at least greeted each other in the lobby when the time came to depart for the airport. The silence in the cab was awkward. Usually one or the other would take the time to insult the other, but even that felt wrong in the moment. Once they were checked in for their flights, they were able to avoid each other. Due to the change in their original flight booking, CC wound up in first class while Niles was placed in coach. He did not acknowledge her when boarding as she faked reading the in-flight magazine. Niles managed some amicable conversation with his seatmate for part of the flight. CC tried working, then napping, and generally searching for other distractions. It was the longest flight she could ever recall being on.

They briefly crossed paths again at baggage claim. Niles helped her with her luggage as much as a courtesy as out of habit and some sense of duty. They both knew that this was New York City, though. England and all that happened was just a memory.

'I'll take a cab,' CC said to Niles. 'There's no point drawing this out longer than necessary.'

'Miss Babcock, I don't mind taking a cab if you'd rather the town car,' Niles said. Mr. Sheffield had arranged pick up for them once he knew their flight plans. He had no way of knowing that his butler and business partner were on the outs and would require separate transport options.

'It's better this way,' CC said. She paused a moment, looked as if she was going to say something more, then walked away.

Niles' heart dropped as CC departed. He held himself together long enough to get through the welcome back greetings from the Sheffield family and Miss Fine. Begging off for being tired from travel, he hauled himself to bed where he sobbed himself to sleep.

End Part 9

A/N: ... Also, apologies for where this one leaves the characters. Another reason for me not to tarry when it comes to updates, I suppose.