AN: I'm so glad you enjoyed the last chapter and thank you for your wonderful comments :) Please keep them coming as they truly make my day and I love reading them!
So when I originally started this fic I only ever intended it to be a one-shot, but due to popular demand, and my own inability to stop writing about them, I think it's safe to say this has turned into an on-going project! I'm back at med school in about a week so I won't be able to post as regularly as I have done with my other fics, but I'll keep the chapters coming and update as frequently as I can :)
This chapter is based on a prompt I was given and it deals with a situation that has arisen on the show before, but focuses on how differently it could have been handled if it were Charles in that situation instead of someone else.
For the record, I am (quite obviously) Team Charles, and also very much Team Liza, which given that he wants what is best for her, and he is what she wants, they are tantamount to the same thing.
I hope you enjoy it and please drop me a review to let me know what you think :) Chapter prompts are also welcome!
CHARLES
Ever since he and Liza had got back from the Hamptons, she'd been spending a lot of time at his house. They spent most nights together now and he loved falling asleep with her in his arms, and waking up with her in the morning. He knew that her moving in permanently was the next step and he absolutely could not wait for that. There was no rush though and he would wait for her cue as to when she was ready for that. He'd already made subtle little changes for her though – a section of his closet now held a few of her outfits, and one of the drawers in his dresser now belonged to her. There was no discussion, it just sort of happened naturally and they slipped seamlessly into this shared living arrangement. It made him smile when he walked around the house and saw little things of hers around the place that showed she'd been there, like her toothbrush in his bathroom, a book she'd been reading on the coffee table, or her reading glasses - that she constantly forgot, on his nightstand. Those were his favourite thing to find – he loved those glasses.
As he straightened his tie and made his way downstairs, the unmistakable giggles of Nicole and Bianca floated through the air, mixed with the sound of Liza's soft voice. The sight he was met with as he leaned on the door frame to the kitchen, melted his heart. The girls were sat at the breakfast bar as Liza leaned over them and placed little pieces of fruit into the shape of faces, on the pancakes she'd cooked for them. He didn't think there was a more beautiful sight than that of all three of his girls smiling and happy together.
Liza looked up and noticed him at the door and smiled warmly at him. "Hey" she greeted him happily.
He grinned and made his way over to them. "Hey". He kissed her tenderly on the cheek then fondly greeted the girls and kissed them on the top of their heads. "Are there any of those left for me?" he asked as he and Liza sat down next to the girls.
"Always" Liza replied, and the look in her eyes made his heart beat faster at the thought of a future with perfect moments like this being a regular occurrence.
"Thank you". He laughed affectionately as she passed him a plate of pancakes, that she'd obviously pre-prepared, one of which had fruit styled into the shape of a book, and the other into the shape of a heart. He was going to marry this woman one day.
Liza squeezed his hand and then turned her attention back to the girls, and he loved that she made such an effort to include them. "You know, I used to make these for Caitlin when she was a little girl"
Bianca smiled at her, seemingly happy that Liza was treating them like she did her own daughter. "Can we meet her Liza?"
"Yeah, can we?" Nicole added excitedly, "She'd be like our big sister."
Liza smiled warmly at them, "Of course - I'm sure Caitlin would love to meet you both."
The girls beamed and Charles's heart swelled at the girls wanting to blend their families, and how comfortable they were around Liza.
After breakfast he herded the girls, complete with all of the things, to the front door, wanting to make sure they got to school on time. He enjoyed having the time now to be able to drop them at school, which is something he was rarely able to do before he stepped down. Liza followed them over and helped the girls put on their backpacks. Charles squeezed her hand fondly and leaned down to place a quick but tender kiss on her lips. "Thank you for this morning. So I'll see you this evening?"
Liza smiled and stroked his hand with her thumb, "You will."
He nodded happily - he would have a permanent smile on his face knowing he would see her again later. "Have a good day."
"You too."
With one last smile he turned and opened the door, expecting the girls to make their way outside, but instead they wrapped themselves around Liza's waist and hugged her. "Bye Liza. Will you be here when we get home?" Bianca asked.
Liza placed a hand on each of their heads and stroked their hair affectionately, "Would you like that?"
"Yeah!" Nicole replied.
"Then I'll come round after I finish at the office."
The girls grinned happily and then waved at her as they left the house. He caught Liza's gaze as he left and no words were needed as he told with his look how much she meant to him and how happy he was.
After dropping the girls at school he sat down in a coffee shop and flicked through some files before his brunch meeting with Quinn. As had become his daily routine, he typed out a text to her. He knew she loved it when he sent her quotes from her favourite authors, so today he went with Hemingway. 'I love you for all that you are, all that you have been, all that you're yet to be.' He clicked 'send' and smiled as he imagined her face when she read it.
After about half an hour he shoved everything back into his briefcase and headed out to his meeting. He was a bit disappointed that Liza hadn't texted him back yet, as she usually responded instantly. He figured she must be on the subway or in a meeting herself.
His meeting with Quinn was productive - with the money that she had invested, the company now had more cash freed up to take on new authors and it seemed they were slowly digging their way out of the financial hole they'd been in. Although they'd gotten a lot done, he couldn't focus 100% on their conversation because he was thinking about Liza. He had a niggling feeling that something was wrong. Charles had texted her again after he finished with Quinn, but that was over an hour ago and he still hadn't heard anything from her, which only intensified that feeling.
He didn't want to come off as clingy or paranoid, but he was genuinely worried about her. After he called her and it just rang out, he reluctantly texted Kelsey to ask if she knew if Liza was okay. He frowned in confusion at her response: 'Haven't seen her - she texted me earlier to say she was working from home.' That didn't make sense because she was dressed and ready to leave for work when he left this morning, and she'd told the girls that she'd come back after finishing at the office too. He was relieved that Kelsey had heard from her, but concerned that something must have happened to cause her to not go in.
Charles knew there was no chance of him getting any more work done until he'd satisfied himself that Liza was alright, so he gathered his things and ordered a car. As she wasn't answering her phone he had to guess as to where she was. Kelsey had said she was working from home, but did that mean her apartment or his house?
Taking a punt, he instructed the driver to take him home. As he opened the front door and walked into the lounge he saw that her jacket was still on the couch as it had been this morning, and he felt hopeful that he'd guessed correctly. When he placed his keys down on the kitchen counter he frowned as he found Liza's phone discarded there. He called out her name but got no reply, so after concluding that she wasn't on the ground floor he jogged up the stairs.
"Liza" he called softly as he pushed open the door to his bedroom, that he now thought of as 'their' bedroom. She wasn't in there, but he saw that the light was on in his bathroom. He knocked lightly on the bathroom door and called out to her again, "Liza, are you alright?". Still no answer. "Liza, I'm coming in okay."
The site he was met with when he gently opened the door, broke his heart. Liza was sat on the floor, leaning against the bathtub, with her arms wrapped around her legs. She looked up at him and he'd never seen her look like that before. All of the colour had drained from her face - she was scared and it looked like she'd been crying because there were faint tear tracks on her cheeks. He immediately dropped to his knees and gently placed his hands on her arms, fearful over what could have happened to get her in such a state.
She opened her mouth to say something but no sound came out, and it was then that the box that was sitting on the bathtub caught his eye. His jaw dropped when he realised what it was.
LIZA
5 hours earlier…
Liza had had the perfect morning - she'd bonded with the girls and spent time with Charles, and kissed him goodbye with the promise to see him later. She smiled widely as she waved the girls off and Charles had looked at her with that look that said that she was his world. It was weird how comfortable she felt here and how totally normal it felt to be in his house, even when she was on her own. They'd sort of just fell into this semi-living together routine whereby it felt stranger for her not to be at his house. She was so happy she even started singing to herself as she got her things together for work.
She was early, so she sat down in the kitchen with a coffee from Charles's fancy coffee machine. She opened her diary and scanned over all her meetings and tasks for the day that were neatly written down. What caught her attention though was the red dot under the date for two days ago, and that was when her day became decidedly less perfect. Her stomach bottomed out - she was late. She was never late. This could not be happening. She could not be pregnant - things were finally going so well for her. Her career had taken off and she was back to where she wanted to be, and her and Charles were better than ever - they were finally on the same page and building something incredible together. She couldn't go back to diapers and night feeds and having someone be totally dependent on her. She'd been there and done that - she loved Caitlin more than anything in the world, but she had no desire to do it again. Now was supposed to be her time - to live her life.
She felt her heart hammering in her chest as she tried to think back over the past month. Her and Charles had had a lot of sex, but they always took precautions - she was on the pill, and she never forgot it. Her brain went into full on freak out mode as she imagined having to tell Charles that she was pregnant. They'd never talked about it before, but she was pretty sure he was on the same page as her and didn't want any more kids. Before she lost all ability to think coherently, Liza grabbed her phone and sent a quick text to Kelsey to say that she was going to work at home today. She knew that there was no possible way that she would be able to do anything productive with regards to work in her current state.
Liza stood up so fast the stool clattered to the floor, making her jump. She picked it up and then tossed her phone into her bag and hurried to the door. Her heart clenched as she picked up her keys, complete with the little Eiffel Tower keyring, and hoped to God that this wasn't the other shoe waiting to drop. She walked the block and a half to the pharmacy in record time and picked out the most expensive, complex looking test she could find. 'Over 99% accurate' – yes, that was what she needed - there was no room for uncertainties. She tapped her foot impatiently as she waited in the queue and then shoved the box unceremoniously into her bag after she'd paid.
As she made her way back to Charles's house she felt her phone vibrate, and tears blurred her eyes as she read his text: 'I love you for all that you are, all that you have been, all that you're yet to be.' He'd sent her a Hemingway quote – her favourite author. She loved him so much. Why couldn't it just be simple for them? Why did there always have to be complications coming along, threatening to get in the way of their happiness? She couldn't face telling him about this yet, so she put her phone back in her pocket and hurried back to the house.
Once back, she dumped her phone and keys on the kitchen counter then hurried up the stairs and into the bathroom in Charles's bedroom. As she sunk down onto the floor and stared at the box that contained a test that had the potential to change her life, she suddenly felt petrified. Liza timidly opened the box and pulled out the instructions, placing the box with the test in it out of her eyesight on the rim of the bathtub. According to the instructions it was fairly simple – pee on the stick, wait three minutes and then she'd have an answer as to whether her life was about to be turned upside or not. Except it didn't seem simple. As anxious as she had been to rush out and get the test, so she could get this over with and find out one way or the other, she now couldn't even bring herself to look at the test, let alone take it.
She let the instructions flutter to the floor and wrapped her arms protectively around her legs. As all of the possible scenarios of what could happen if she got a positive result ran through her head, she became more and more scared. She wasn't sure how long she sat there like that for, with the test lying untouched next to her, but she was pretty sure it was a long time because her legs had started to go numb. It wasn't until she heard Charles's concerned voice calling her name that she snapped out of her trance. Her heart rate sped back up as he gently pushed the bathroom door open and looked at her with so much care on his face it made her want to cry. She felt guilty because he'd probably been worried by her lack of contact as they were always texting during the day. When he crouched down in front of her and asked her if she was alright, she wanted to just throw herself into his arms and for him to tell her that everything was going to be okay.
Liza opened her mouth to reply to him but found that her brain had turned to mush, and no sound came out. She saw his gaze flick over to the box that was still laying dormant on the bathtub and watched as his eyes widened and his jaw dropped in shock, as it registered with him why she was sat on the bathroom floor in this state. He looked back at her and she held her breath in anticipation of his reaction.
"Are we…?" he asked softly. Even in her anxious state, Liza's heart swelled with love for him at his use of "we" as opposed to "you". It showed that he saw them as being in this together rather than it just being her issue to deal with.
"I don't know" she managed to croak out, her voice hoarse from lack of use. "I haven't built up the courage to take the test yet."
Charles sat down next to her and took her hand in his, interlacing their fingers. "Well why don't we do it together?"
She could see in his eyes that he was as nervous as she was, but he was here and he wanted to support her. He was being strong for her, so she would be strong for him. "Okay" she whispered. She reached for the box and let out a deep breath as she took the test out. "Okay, I can do this."
"We can do this" Charles corrected.
Liza smiled warmly at him and some of her fear eased. She squeezed his hand to show her gratitude.
He blushed as he asked "Do you need a cup or something?"
She couldn't help but smile at his awkwardness. "Yeah that would probably make it easier."
Charles pushed himself up and rooted around in the bathroom cabinet, before handing her a plastic cup that looked like it belonged to one of the girls. She made a mental note to buy them a new one.
"Thanks."
Charles nodded and smiled fondly at her. "I'll wait outside while you erm…"
"Okay" Liza couldn't help but find his awkwardness amusing – it was probably due to his upper-class upbringing, but it was actually helping to ease some of her stress.
With Charles waiting patiently on the other side of the door, Liza did what was necessary and peed into the kiddie cup. She felt a little like a toddler as she redressed and called out "I'm done".
Charles came back in and smiled encouragingly at her. "So what now?"
"Now we dip the stick". He nodded and watched as she did just that, then replaced the cap and put the stick down on the sink. "And now we wait."
"How long does it take to get a result?"
"3 minutes."
"3 minutes – we can do that." He sat down on the edge of the bathtub and taking her hand he pulled her down onto his lap. He wrapped his arm around her waist and tenderly brushed the hair out of her face. "I know you're scared" he murmured softly, "I'm scared too. But Liza, whatever happens in 3 minutes time, I want you to know that I'll support you in whatever you want to do. We're in this together and I'll be there for you – no matter what."
Liza smiled gratefully at him. His words and support meant more to her than he'd ever know, but this couldn't all be about her – she had to know how he felt too. "But what about you – do you want any more kids?"
Charles held her gaze and spoke softy as he replied, "Liza, I have two beautiful daughters who I love beyond measure – I don't need any more children to make me feel complete. But if it turned out that you were pregnant, and you wanted to keep it, then it would be a little piece of you and me, and I would love him or her just as much as I love Nicole and Bianca. But equally though, I would never want you to go through with something that you didn't want. You're more than enough for me Liza – I don't need anything or anyone else in order to be happy."
Liza swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat at his words. He meant it – he was 100% sincere and it meant the world to her. When she'd been in this situation with Josh, she knew he wanted kids and that he would have wanted her to keep the baby, if there were one, even though he knew it wasn't what she wanted. With Charles however, they were on the same page and she knew he would support her without judgement in whatever decision she made. She glanced down at her watch, "It's been more than 3 minutes."
He squeezed her hand in support as she reached over and picked up the test. As she turned it over and read the word in the little screen she sighed loudly and closed her eyes. "It's negative" she breathed in relief.
Charles held her close and rested his head on top of hers. "Are you okay?"
"I am now." Liza lifted her head and smiled warmly at him, "Thank you…for being you" she added and stroked his cheek affectionately. "Are you okay?"
"I am" Charles replied, "I was worried when I found you in here curled up on the floor, but now I know that you're okay, then I'm okay too."
Liza leaned in and kissed him tenderly, wanting to show him how much she appreciated him. Her brain was too emotionally spent to formulate a sufficiently eloquent response. She pulled back and smiled at him, "I'm relieved" she admitted. "I love kids but I don't want to go back to diapers, no sleep and night feeds again. I like my life as it is now – I love my job, and I love you – I love us. And I don't want to have to share myself with anyone else. Do you understand?"
Charles smiled affectionately and rested his forehead on hers. "I do, and I feel the same. I don't want to have to share you with anyone else either."
Liza was so glad they were in agreement on this, because it's a big thing to have a difference of opinion on. "I think I'm gunna go and see my OBGYN and ask her if there's any better contraceptive methods. See if we can't avoid any more anxiety attacks!"
Charles ran his fingers up and down her spine soothingly, "Would you like me to come with you?"
Liza looked up at him in surprise. She'd never met a man who would willingly accompany her to see her OBGYN. "You'd do that?"
It was Charles's turn to look surprised. "Of course. Why wouldn't I?"
Liza sighed happily as she looked at him. "You really are an amazing man."
Charles gave her that look of his that always made her heart swell and kissed her sweetly on the nose. "Kelsey said that you were working from home today."
"Yeah I didn't think I'd be very productive going in to the office today. I haven't exactly been very productive staying at home either – I should really do some work." She went to get up but Charles smiled and pulled her back down onto his lap.
"That wasn't what I was getting at" he replied softly, "You called this home."
Liza blushed and ducked her head. She hadn't even realised she'd been doing it. She spent more time here than she did at her own apartment and she had to admit that she did feel at home here, surrounded by Charles and his things, and the girls. "Erm, yeah…I guess I have been spending a lot of time here."
Charles gently tipped her chin up with his finger so she was looking at him, and the happiness emanating in his eyes was palpable. "Liza, it's a good thing – I want you to feel at home here." He stroked her cheek with his thumb as he continued, "And I want my home to eventually be your home too. I don't want to rush you – take your time, I just want you to know, that when you are ready, that I want it too – I want to wake up with you in my arms, every day."
Liza's eyes widened in surprise at his admission. She was touched that he wanted to fully share his life with her. "Do you think we could do that?"
Charles smiled, "I'd say we're almost there anyway – we spend 75% of our nights together now, and I think we make a pretty good job of it."
Liza returned his smile as she recalled all of the happy little domestic moments they'd shared here since they got together – they did make a good team. "The other 25% should be pretty easy then, huh?"
Charles nodded affectionately and then murmured in her ear, "We would be together and have our books, and at night be warm in bed together with the windows open and the stars bright."
Liza sighed happily, "A Moveable Feast!" She beamed at him – he'd just quoted her favourite book, by her favourite author. She shook her head in happy amazement at his ability to pluck from his seemingly infinite literary memory, the most perfectly apt quote for the moment. He grinned at her reaction. "That sounds perfect, and I will definitely give that a lot of thought."
Charles's smile was so bright that it lit up his whole face and she could tell he picked up on her re-use of the words she'd said to him right after he kissed her for the first time at the Paramus Mall, all that time ago. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he leaned down and kissed her softly, the stress of the day melting away as she lost herself in the man she loved.
