Hey all, I've got you a monster chapter here! It's much longer than I usually post for this story, but don't get used to it ok. It was normal length, then I edited it and it became much longer, but it won't be a regular occurrence. You find out some things about Anamika in this chapter (yay!) and also the start of one of her most important relationships in this story. Kudos if you catch it (it's quite obvious;)

Thanks for all the favourites and follows and especially to LoveAndWar2001, celia azul, Kaylamrr, elljayde, portalefiamme and Guest for reviewing. Guest, I'll answer your question at the end of the chapter, as we find out some things about Anamika this chapter. Also, I love answering questions and if you're a Guest leaving a review, I'll respond in my author's note, but do me a favorand give yourself a name in your review, in case I have multiple guest reviews, as has happened before:)

Enjoy!

Chapter 11

Anamika woke up in a locked room, the windows boarded up and a big red headed man sitting on a chair in front of the only door, his thick arms crossed over his chest, with his eyes trained on her like a hawk.

She twitched a bit, checking to see if she had anything tying her down, but found to her surprise that she had nothing restraining her or keeping her from escaping. She didn't entirely count the guard as something standing in her way, even if he was a big guy and she could tell he had some training, probably military judging by his posture and eyes.

She closed her eyes again, breathing through her nose as she pushed the panic down. She was obviously inside the walls and she was tempted to throw a tantrum and knock Daryl and Rick on their asses for bringing her in here, but the deed was done now. In the light of day, well, the little bit that shone through the boarded windows, she could see that she might have overreacted a tiny bit.

She standed by what she thought, about the weaknesses she observed in this place, but she had confidence in her skills to survive if there was an attack. Besides, with her here now, she could maybe cover those weaknesses.

Don't get her wrong, she was terrified of living in a community filled with weak people, people who didn't know what it was like out there, but she was also sure that Rick, their leader who she had been introduced to last night, wouldn't just let her walk out now and she didn't want to hurt anyone. She lived in isolation in order to keep innocent people from being hurt by her, so she's not going to start now.

Of course, she didn't know how innocent Rick was, seeing as he had been covered in blood when he came out, but that was unavoidable in today's world.

So although it was tempting to let the panic fill her again and to fight her way out, as she knew she could, that would be just what they expected and here, they had the home ground advantage. She was on their turf and she'd prefer not to kill a dozen or more people in her quest to be free. Thus, yawning, she settled back and made herself comfortable on the surprisingly soft bed and pillows. She wondered why she got such a luxury, but figured it might have to do with Aaron, since it certainly hadn't been her charming personality.

When her guard saw she was up, he stood and, without turning his back on her, knocked on the door. She was instantly more impressed to know there was a guard outside her door as well and nodded slightly, ignoring the way the redhead narrowed his eyes at the action.

About three minutes passed in silence as she looked through the slats of the boarded up window, reckoning it was just after dawn and most people would still be asleep.

It wasn't long before the door to her jail opened and Rick walked in, Daryl at his back, along with another tiny woman that looked as if the weight of the world was on her shoulders. She didn't look interested in the happenings around her, more as if she was obligated to be here, but couldn't care less about the outcome.

"Morning. We haven't met properly, I'm Rick."

She eyed him, surprised at the formalities, seeing as it was pretty obvious who he was, as Aaron had told her all about the new sheriff in town, but she obliged him nonetheless, "Anna."

"Aaron tells me last night was not the usual behavior for you, but I wonder about that. You seemed too willing to fight , and used to it as well." Anamika looked at Rick in silence, raising an eyebrow when she could see irritation crawling over his face.

"When I ask a question, I expect it to be answered."

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't hear any questions there, only a statement." Rick's lips thinned as his eyes became more intense and Anamika wondered for a split second if it was smart to antagonise the man, though she decided she didn't really care.

"Alright, well, then let me list some more things." Sighing, she sat back, wholly unconcerned with the threats and promises she was sure to follow. Though when he did speak, she was quick to sit up and take notice at what he was saying.

"Daryl tells me you're the one that stole some of his deer in Georgia all those months ago. I would say seven months is a long time to be travelling alone and come as far as you did, but Aaron tells me that you've been alone from practically the start of all this. Of course, if this is what I think it is, you can obviously take care of yourself," Rick said, holding up a piece of paper she had signed for the people when she had written them a note, before Rick continued.

"We've seen an A like this before, carved into the face of a cannibal named Gareth. Daryl here was told some stories by men who called themselves the Claimers, who said some of their men were murdered and this was carved into the chest of one. That was you."

"I still don't hear a question" Anamika's heart was thudding in her ears and she had to consciously fight to keep her breathing level and calm. These people knew far more about her than what she had imagined, but luckily, they still didn't know everything. If they had, she would be dead already.

"Cut the bullshit. Was that you or not?" She rolled her eyes and held up her hands mockingly when Rick's eyes narrowed and his fist clenched around the paper. She was kind of amused by the tension lining his body, but finally decided to stop screwing around, as she didn't want to do this all day.

"Yes, it was me. I was captured at Terminus and while escaping, decided to leave Gareth with a little present instead of just killing him."

"Why? You left him to continue slaughtering people, you changed nothing!" A fire lit in Anamika's eyes and she sat up straight, leaning forward a little to gaze directly into Rick's eyes, ignoring the way everyone else tensed up.

"I changed something for me! I am trying to survive. That means I can't think about people I don't even know. I'm one woman, I can't save everyone. In that situation, killing Gareth would have lit an even bigger fire under the rest's asses, they would have come out en masse in search of revenge. By mutilating him, I showed them I was not to be messed with and left them something else to focus on besides me. It worked, they never sent out search groups more than five people. The way I dealt with Gareth ensured I survived. I did enough for other people by carving up his face and making sure no one could look at him and not suspect something was wrong."

Anamika couldn't make out the look in Rick's eyes, but she thought she saw a grudging respect in Daryl's and a smile twitching subtly on the big red headed man's face.

"What about the Claimers?" Anamika shrugged, relaxing back into the pillows.

"They weren't good men, who thought they could take advantage of a woman travelling alone. I just showed them the error of their ways."

Rick nodded, seeming contemplative, before he turned back to her.

"Aaron told me you said you wouldn't pass my three questions." Anamika stayed quiet, chills travelling down her spine. She knew what was coming and she really didn't want to have to fight her way out of there.

"How many walkers have you killed?"

"I'm not sure, they become a blur after a while. I've been out there on my own for almost two years, so, suffice to say, a lot."

"How many people have you killed?" Anamika pressed her lips together, her eyes trained on Rick's. She could see in his eyes that if she didn't answer, he would kill her anyway. She wondered what was even the point in answering if they would try to kill her either way, because her monster within would be on show with her answer.

But then she looked deep in those blue eyes that were so similarly shadowed like hers and she paused. Maybe, just maybe, he would understand. She can see that he's been out there as well, that he had killed as well and she felt it was a number close to hers. So she decided to take a chance.

"37."

She could hear the woman gasping and Daryl and the other guy straightened, their postures tense and weapons held in hand, though it wasn't pointed at her yet. Rick didn't react, just continued to search her eyes.

"Why?" Why, Anamika wondered. She knew why she killed most of the people, but how to explain the ones she did while zoning out, the ones who she could have left instead of killing them? She didn't think they would understand the complexity that was her mind and body working against her heart, hell, she didn't even understand it. So she settled on a simple answer that explained the core of her problem.

"Most of them were bad people that wanted to take advantage of me. The rest were because I wanted to survive, because if I didn't kill them, they would have killed me." Rick made no mention of how she seperated the bad people from the ones who wanted to kill her but apparently wasn't bad, but she could see he had caught it and wondered about it. She decided to make a point.

"Tell me Rick, how many people have you killed?" Rick met her gaze, his eyes steady, and she knew he had no obligation to answer her, but knew he would anyway, since he was like her.

"23." She smiled.

"Why?"

"Because it was them or me, my family. And I chose my family." She nodded, knowing the hard decision to take a life in order to protect someone else. It never gets easier to deal with. The act might be easy, but the face haunts you. That didn't mean, however, that she wouldn't do it if she had to.

"Aaron said you refused to come inside the gates last night, that something had you unsettled. What was it?" She looked up, wondering if she should really tell them about their vulnerabilities. By telling them, it meant she was making a commitment to helping them and ultimately staying. They may not know that, but she knew it. She had hunted and provided for these people and if she helped them fortify their community…

Well, for her, that was as committed as she could get. She tilted her head to the side, observing the man who could be her soul twin in darkness and she wondered why Rick needed to ask why she didn't want to come in. She was sure he could see the same vulnerabilities she could. Rick seemed to read the question in her eyes and he turned slightly, gesturing to the petite woman who had so far not said a word, though she looked a bit more present than she did before.

"This is Deanna, she's the leader of this community." Anamika's eyes travelled up and down her body, reading the strength of a woman in her stance, but the weakness of a victim in her eyes. She could see that she had some knowledge of how it is out there, but she could also see, that though she was dealing with a loss, she had never experienced the world out there and was ignorant of its dangers.

Suddenly she knew, she knew that Rick had tried to tell this woman about their vulnerabilities, but she hadn't listened and though Rick wasn't sure exactly what had caused her minor freak out, he did know it was something Deanna needed to hear. She smiled grimly, knowing that Rick was using her to shock the truth into this woman, because Deanna wouldn't listen to him and in the short time he had known Anna, he had read her and knew she wouldn't be afraid to speak her mind. She had to hand it to the guy, she was impressed.

So she decided to humor him.

"It was the weaknesses of this place. I won't live in a place where I am not safe." Deanna's eyebrows furrowed as she frowned. She was carefully regarding Anamika.

"I can assure you, Anna, that Alexandria is quite safe. We've never had a breach of security before. Well, before last night that is and I can assure you, that's a singular occurrence." The monster within her roared and Anamika smiled, showing a bit too much teeth and she could see Deanna's body fighting not to flinch, while redhead shifted slightly, more alert.

"You walls could easily be breached, either by climbing those braces or using the beams. You have no lookout, no snipers last night and no patrols. Your walls are dark and though that keeps the dead ignorant, it's not the dead you have to worry about. The darkness creates shadows, more places to hide in. Same with the forest. I could come right up to your community and you would never see me coming with your limited watches and dark corners. Hell, the road to your gate is open and accessible, I could come and ram a truck right into it and break through that pretty gate if my vehicle is big enough and I build up enough momentum.. Tell me, do your people carry weapons around inside?" Deanna hesitated and that was all the answer Anamika needed.

"They'll never be able to stop me. They'd be dead before they can reach the armory to arm themselves. Hell, I blow up the armory or secure it and you're done for. I've taken down more well guarded settlements before without breaking a sweat."

This seemed to alarm Rick and Daryl, as they exchanged a look while Deanna's face was filled with shock, before she calmed herself again and looked Anamika square in the eyes.

"So, what would you do to reinforce our security?" Anamika tilted her head, wondering again if she wanted to help these people who treated her with so much hostility, when her survival isn't even guaranteed. She didn't owe them anything, she didn't need to tell them anything. But her bleeding heart couldn't leave Aaron exposed and, though she didn't want to admit it, she wanted these people safe.

She sighed, rolling her shoulders and stretching her arms above her head, ignoring the way everyone twitched, before she sat forward, her eyes trained intently on Deanna, deadly serious.

"I would wrap heavy duty barbed wire around all of the braces, making it more difficult to climb. It wouldn't stop those who are really determined, but it will help. Dig trenches around the outside of the wall and fill it with spikes and you get the double security of keeping things away from your wall and killing anyone who tried to climb the braces, but falls because of the wire."

Daryl was nodding, but Anamika ignored him as she continued, "Install lights around the wall, like solar powered spot lights, that you can cover if necessary, but have if you need them. Cut down the first line of trees, followed by the second line of trees cut off about a yard above the ground, the third line a bit higher, continuing six or seven lines in. You won't give away your cover, but you will create some better sight lines."

She flicked her gaze to Rick, reading the subtle smugness in his stance before she turned back to Deanna.

"Build at the very least four lookout points, one facing each direction and have watch around the hour. Patrols inside and outside the wall lines, with walkies to communicate with each other. Use cars and other debris to block the road, make it less accessible and to funnel any undesirables to where you want them. Make it so that no one has a straight shot to your gates, rather they have to drive around obstacles and thus slow down. Have everyone carry a gun and knife to protect themselves and make sure they know how to use it. Do I need to go on?"

Rick had been nodding along with what she was saying, but Deanna's face was sour.

"You would have us turn this place into an armed camp. We are a community. We remind people here what it is to live, not just survive. We keep things normal."

"Then you will live and die." Deanna reared back, stunned, but Anamika didn't care. Sh had to get this woman to understand.

"You might want to keep things normal in here, but no one out there got your memo. They don't care that you're trying to make a good living here or that you want to keep things normal, they just care about what they can take from you and how to best expose your weaknesses. And boy, they have the cake thrown in their laps right here. They attack now, and there would be almost nothing you can do to stop them."

Deanna had a stubborn tilt to her chin, but Anamika could see that she was listening, even if she didn't necessarily agree with what she was saying. However, the auburn haired woman knew she didn't have to convince Deanna, Rick would take it from here, she could see that in his eyes and the determination that lined every part of his body.

It was soon after that Deanna left, seemingly having had enough for the day and so did Daryl and Rick after telling her they'd be back soon. She was left alone with Abraham again, though not for long, for as soon as the sun had come up completely, Aaron came to pay her a visit. She immediately felt guilt flood her at the sight of him, as she remembered how she had punched him in the stomach, and quite hard at that.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't want to hurt you, but…" Aaron smiled and she could see the complete forgiveness in his eyes. Relief filled her, to know that the first friend she had made in the apocalypse didn't hate her now, especially because he had more than enough reason to.

"Hey, it's fine, I knew what I was getting myself into when I stepped in front of you. I know you held back, otherwise I wouldn't be up and walking now." She ducked her head, embarrassed, but for Aaron it seemed to be over and done with, as he immediately talked about how excited Eric was to talk to her again and how happy the people of Alexandria will be to hear she was there.

She felt quite shy and more than a bit terrified at the knowledge that these people were looking forward to meeting her, but also indescribably happy. For the next two hours or so, they were talking about nonsense topics, keeping themselves entertained, before Rick came strutting in, his hand on his pistol and a young man with a sheriff hat behind him.

"Aaron, meeting at Deanna's house. Abraham, you need to be there as well." Rick then turned to her, his face deadly serious and she could see the darkness in his eyes expand.

"Carl is going to be right outside the door. He has a walkie and a gun. If I find out you tried anything or hurt a single hair on my son's head, I will kill you in the most painful way I can think off, and keep your walking corpse tied up by the front gate as a warning to others. Do you understand me?"

She looked him in the eye and though she could have let her own darkness rise in challenge to his, she didn't have any reason to. This was another test, she was only surprised he was doing it with his son. He must have a lot of confidence in his son's abilities, that and the AK-47 his son was toting around.

So instead she smiled.

"Yeah, no problem. I don't make a habit of hurting kids." Carl seemed to scoff at her kids remark and she threw him a quick grin and wink, before they all left the room and locked the door. She knew now would be the best time to escape, but oddly enough, since meeting Rick and Daryl, she didn't feel as antsy about being inside the walls anymore. If they had an entire group of people just like those two, then Alexandria had a layer of protection more than what she had realised.

About 20 minutes had passed and Anamika was bored out of her mind. She didn't do well sitting still and the room was too small to pace properly. Instead, she decided to do some exercise. Getting up from the bed, she got down on the floor and started doing one-handed pushups, focusing her mind on the stretch and pull of her muscles.

When she got a nice rhythm going, she softly started to sing. It was one of her training programs, if she was in a secure enough place to do it, as singing required her to keep her breathing steady and regulated while doing something strenuous. It built her lung capacity up while training her muscles, something she needed in this world, as you often had to run far or fight for long periods of time.

There was a time when I was alone

Nowhere to go and no place to call home

My only friend was the man in the moon

And even sometimes he would go away, too

Then one night, as I closed my eyes

I saw a shadow flying high

He came to me with the sweetest smile

Told me he wanted to talk for awhile

He said, "Peter Pan, that's what they call me

I promise that you'll never be lonely, " and ever since that day

I am a lost boy from Neverland

Usually hanging out with Peter Pan

And when we're bored we play in the woods

Always on the run from Captain Hook

"Run, run, lost boy, " they say to me

Away from all of reality

Anamika was aware of the door opening a bit and Carl looking in at her, probably curious about what she was doing, but she ignored him as she continued singing. She didn't have a superstar voice, but she had a decent enough one, so luckily she knew she wasn't breaking the poor kid's ears.

She continued on, singing one of the rare songs that somehow stuck in her head after everything, even though she can't remember where she heard it. When she came to the chorus again, it was, to her great surprise, to suddenly hear another voice join in, a deeper but still juvenile one and, looking up without pausing in her song, she found that Carl was singing along softly.

I am a lost boy from Neverland
Usually hanging out with Peter Pan
And when we're bored we play in the woods
Always on the run from Captain Hook
"Run, run, lost boy, " they say to me
Away from all of reality
Neverland is home to lost boys like me
And lost boys like me are free
Neverland is home to lost boys like me
And lost boys like me are free
Peter Pan, Tinkerbell, Wendy Darling
Even Captain Hook, you are my perfect story book
Neverland, I love you so
You are now my home sweet home
Forever a lost boy at last

She trailed off after the chorus, stopping her pushups as she sat cross legged on the floor in front of Carl, her eyes trained curiously on him. He cleared his throat, seeming in thought, before he finally sat down on the chair the man named Abraham had left behind. Though his body seemed relaxed, she could see he was ready to use the assault rifle in his hands at short notice, but she didn't pay that any notice as he started talking.

"My mom used to sing that to me. Even after this all started, she would sing it to me on days when it was hard, which was a lot. When I heard you sing it… It just reminded me of her."

Anamika nodded, her heart going out to the young man that had been forced to grow up too quickly, as she could only imagine what happened to his mom by the tone of his voice. She felt compelled to share a bit of herself with him, the pain in his voice touching something inside of her.

He would be the first person who knows this about her, though he definitely wouldn't be the last, as she knew very well anything she told him, he would report to his dad. Somehow, when looking into his eyes, she couldn't seem to care.

"I can't remember how I know the song. In fact, I can't remember much of anything. I have almost no memories prior to the apocalypse. I know my name because I had a medical bracelet that said it around my wrist, which I've long since lost. I have some serious survival skills, as well as a ton of knowledge on how to use firearms, other weapons and several forms of martial arts. Near as I can figure out, I was probably trained as a soldier or something similar, but I can't really remember. I don't have any memories pertaining to myself, just general knowledge."

Carl looked shocked and unsure of how to respond. He seemed to think about it a bit, before replying.

"That sucks." She let loose a startled bark of laughter at his blunt tone, a genuine grin stretched across her face.

"I don't know, I don't have people to miss and anything from the old world to hold me back. I was practically made for this world." Carl seemed to regard her deeply at that, his gaze far too intense for someone of his age.

"That's sad." She smirked, somewhat self-deprecatingly.

"I guess it is."

They both looked up when Daryl walked in and she wondered for how long he had been outside the door, as she hadn't heard any footsteps.

"Carl, ya ain't supposed to be in here. Your dad's not gonna be happy."

"I'm fine Daryl ,we were just talking." Carl rolled his eyes in the typical manner of a teenager, before he stood and walked out of the room, giving her a small wave which she readily returned. She really liked that kid.

"Come on, I'm here ta spring ya."

"Rick know you doing this?" She joked, laughing at the look he threw her. As if he would take her out of her glorified cell without Rick's knowledge. She followed him out, taking a deep breath of fresh air as they stepped outside. She hated being cooped up.

She smiled as she followed Daryl, curiously looking around her. Everything was so…clean. Immaculate. It was almost unreal and immediately made her feel as if she was walking into a fairy tale.

"It true, what you told the kid?" Knowing exactly what he was speaking of, she nodded, sighing as she elaborated after seeing his curious gaze.

"Yep. Woke up in what I later found out was the CDC, handcuffed to a bed and no memories of my life previously. Everything was going to hell around me and despite having no clue who I was, I knew I was in danger. I can't explain it, my body just knew something was wrong."

She exhaled harshly, remembering that confusing moment she woke up, her head ringing and curiously blank, yet filled with knowledge at the same time.

"Encountered one of the dead there for the first time, as I made my way out through the chaos of the military swarming the place and the scientists running around. It was real early on, like in the first week after the outbreak. When I got away, I found some weapons and gear and not long after, I met a couple. Stayed with them for about a week or so before… before they died. I vowed not to join another group again and here I am, almost two years later."

"Does your...amnesia have any effect on you? Like flashbacks and shit?" She hesitated, not sure if she wanted to tell him her darkest secrets, but something about Daryl was inherently trustworthy, almost more so than Rick and she found herself thinking that he wouldn't judge her. Besides, if she was going to be kept here like some caged animal, it's better for everyone if they knew exactly what they were in for.

"Well… Not flashbacks as such, I would have welcomed those. Sometimes, when I'm in danger, my mind kind of… fades. I go into this zone, where I eliminate whatever I register as a threat, without being totally aware. It's as if I'm a puppet and someone suddenly decided to play with my strings. It doesn't happen often,as I'm usually skilled enough to avoid getting into situations where I'm cornered, but it has happened before. It… It happened with Gareth and those Claimers. It almost happened last night, but I managed to hold it back. That's why I didn't want to come when Aaron first invited me. I'm more dangerous than I mean to be sometimes."

Daryl nodded, seeming deep in thought, but he wasn't a man of many words, she had soon realised and so she didn't try to fill the silence, instead comfortably strolling along. It was weird, confiding in a stranger who she had known for less than 24 hours, but also oddly liberating. She felt as if the load on her shoulders became slightly lighter and marvelled at the sensation, smiling softly as she strolled along with this rough redneck.

She found she wouldn't mind spending more time with him and felt completely at ease for the first time since she can remember. She wasn't sure if that was because he made her feel safe, or because she knew he could probably protect others from her if she gets out of control.

Daryl showed her to a house, saying that he was to watch her for now and that if it wasn't him, it would be someone else. She would have an around the clock guard till Rick felt she could be trusted, but for the moment he had other matters to deal with.

So instead, she entered the weirdly clean house on Daryl's heels and after wandering around the pristine mansion a bit and smearing dirt all over, Daryl showed her where the shower was, which she thoroughly enjoyed, before she sat down in the living room with a book open in her lap. It had been a long time since she was able to enjoy the unnecessary things in life and seeing as she was on lock-down, with her own gruff redneck prison guard, she might as well try this living instead of surviving thing, see what the big deal was. So ignoring Daryl's perpetual scowl and silence, she settled back and tried to enjoy the book.

Soon as she figured out who the hell Mr. Darcy was and why everyone seemed to like him so much.

WD

So, I hope that Anamika's background isn't too stupid or cliche, believe me, there's going to be a few more twists along the way, this is only the start.

Guest: So, answer to your question, Anamika isn't particularly Nepali or even indo-european; I mean, she might have some mixed blood as most people do, but she was born in America and her parents or grandparents weren't immigrants. As you see, Anamika is the name she saw on a medical bracelet, meaning it could be her real name or it couldn't, it's just what she goes by now. I will say, *spoiler alert* there is more meaning behind it than just a name. The kukri is just a blade she found along the way, no particular meaning to it than I thought it looked cool. So imagine her the way you want to, but just know she is 100% American.

I also just wanted to clarify, in case some readers are disappointed by Anamika's behavior this chapter or thinks it's weird, she isn't some unreasonable killing machine. In fact, she cares too much about people, which is why she's being so cautious, as she's afraid she's going to die protecting them or hurt them herself. This is about the most important part of her character, as it explains everything she does. She tells her past to strangers because she wants them to be prepared in case she zones out. She doesn't put up a fight after being forced inside the community, because she doesn't want innocent people to get hurt. Her killing that couple damaged her so bad, that she about lives in fear of herself. She might be badass, but does that sound like someone who doesn't care and just does whatever she wants?

Tell me what you think about this and Anamika. I always love psychoanalyzingmy characters with other people and hear how they see them:)