Another four weeks pass us by, yet it took me this long to update. I suppose that this may have been due to the fact that I write seven other stories in addition to this, including a story which needs to have at least 5,000 words per chapter. But the main factor is laziness. Unfortunately, this is only going to get worse. You see, I'll be returning to college on the 9th of September, which means less time for updates. But since that is at least two and a half weeks away, I will try to squeeze in another chapter for this fic. Obviously, I'll still be updating my stories during college, but time will be an issue. Welcome to adulthood, children.

Anyway, on with the story.

My Big Fat Creepy Roommate

No Chance of Escape

Trent punched Owen in the chin nine times. Owen grabbed Trent by the neck and fired him at the bookcase. Trent stood up and noticed there were eighty-one books on the bookcase. Owen was charging at Trent until Trent threw the books at him, nine books at a time. Next, Trent climbed to the top of the bookcase and leaped from it onto Owen. Trent bounced nine times on Owen's belly before jumping high into the air. Trent performed nine summersaults before cannon-balling onto Owen's face. Owen bit Trent's arse as hard as he could, causing Trent to yelp.

"OOOWWWWWW! OOOWWWWWW! OOOWWWWWW! OOOWWWWWW! OOOWWWWWW! OOOWWWWWW! OOOWWWWWW! OOOWWWWWW! OOOWWWWWW!" yelped Trent. "YOU'LL PAY FOR THAT, NINE-HATER!" Trent kicked Owen in the balls nine times. Owen grabbed Trent by the hair and flung the numerical cultist over his head.

Trent landed upside down on the chair. That's when Owen sat on his stomach. A torrent of nauseous farts pelted Trent in the face at the speed of light. It smelt worse than anything Trent smelt before. Owen farted on Trent ten times, causing Trent's blood to boil to a temperature of 99 degrees Celsius. Trent tilted his head forward and bit Owen.

Right in the balls.

"AAAAAOOOOWWWW-HOO-HOO-HOO-HOO!" wailed Owen. The bite caused him to jump forward and fall out of his chair. This enabled Trent to get off the chair and pounce on Owen. He proceeded to strangle the tub-of-lard.

"I'll teach you to fart on me nine times!" Trent hissed. "AND I HATE TEN!" he shouted in Owen's ear. Owen rolled over, crushing Trent under his weight. Trent was unable to kick Owen off of him because of the mass on his legs. However, Trent could always bite Owen again.

Which he did.

"YEEEOOOOOUUUUUCCCHH!" Owen yelped, before deliberately banging his head against Trent's chin ten times, causing his chin to bleed. Trent finally found the strength to force Owen's body off of him. Unfortunately for him, just as the musician managed the pry himself out from under Owen's mass, Owen grabbed Trent and fired the numerical cultist into the kitchen.

Trent groaned in agony as he rubbed his chin. Next, he sensed that Owen was running towards him. Acting swiftly, Trent stood up, grabbed the utensil drawer and pulled it open, withdrawing a rather blunt knife simply because it was the ninth knife in a row of knives. Trent proceeded to stab Owen nine times. But just after Trent stabbed him for the eighth time, Owen punched Trent in the face, prompting the musician to stumble backwards and onto the hob. Owen turned the hob on and set all five rings to the highest possible temperature, burning Trent's biscuits. Trent shrieked nine times and jumped into the air in shock, only to bang his head off of the extractor fan and fall to the floor.

"Need to cool off, eh, ya little nine-loving bastard?!" Owen jeered. He grabbed Trent by the neck and stuffed him into the chest freezer. Before Owen could slam the lid on Trent's head, Trent bit Owen's fingers as hard as he could. Owen screeched in sheer pain as he attempted to pull his hand out of Trent's mouth. But Trent's grip was too strong, so Owen ended up swinging Trent around the room in a full 3240 degrees. That was when Trent let go, for fear he'd end up going 3241 or over.

That was also when Trent flew out the closed window.

But Owen wasn't finished with him yet. Owen jumped out yet another closed window and landed into the skip, where Trent was lying in. The two neighbours proceeded to fire shards of glass and pieces of rubbish at one another, yet they would always miss.

This went on for five hours. It only ended when the skip was in motion.

"Wait, do you feel that we're moving?" Trent asked.

"Wait a minute…" Owen paused. He looked over the edge to see the skip being lifted off the ground by a fork-lift attached to a truck…

The same truck which the skip was being placed on.

"Let go of me! Let me go!"

Chef ignored Justin, who was squirming in the former's tight grasp, as he carried the ex-model to his car. Chef chucked Justin into the boot and slammed the door shut. Chef hopped into the driver's sit and slammed the key into the ignition before flooring it.

Roughly half an hour later, Chef opened up the boat, grabbed Justin and flung him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. That was when Justin realised that he was in the countryside. That was when Justin realised there was a derelict mansion right in front of him.

That was when Justin realised that there was no chance of escape.

Not much of a shocker chapter, though I hope you still liked it. It took a lot of boredom to motivate me to write this. The fight scene may not have been epic, but this is probably my second time writing a fight scene, and I think I did pretty well. Think. Well I must go and see if I could update more of my fics.

Until next time!