Chapter 32 Confessions

Hiei showered quickly, cleansing his body of the blood he spilled in the battle earlier before. The fight didn't last long. Mitage didn't have many forces left but the fight was fairly bloody. Heiwa was getting a good taste for battle and he enjoyed the fluidity of the sword. He felt swifter and stronger with the blade in his hands. Ai, however, he could not bring himself to draw. That and he had no experience in dual wielding. Once Mitage was dead, he could work on those skills then.

Upon leaving the bathroom, he dressed quickly and noticed there was food waiting for him, courtesy of Maria. A letter with a small package was also placed next to the food. He opened the letter as he ate knowing full well who it was from.

Herven,

Remember all those months ago when I was working on that ridiculous scarf? Well I finished it because that's how bored I am. My poor Víra hasn't seen any action lately because Kuwabara refuses to spar with me, spouting ridiculous nonsense about how I am a woman. Yusuke and Kurama are dealing with what's happening in the demon world which leaves no one near my level of expertise to train with. Do you see the torture I'm in? Claudia and Shana are handling things well here and most of the injured demons have already returned. Boton was here the other day and mentioned that if the situation wasn't resolved soon, Koenma will be forced to put the barrier back up. That means I won't see you for a long time! So come get me before you have a weak wife who can't lift her sword because she didn't have anyone to spar with or was unable to see real action involving driving her darling Víra through Mitage's bowels. Or before I start making another scarf for you (and I will make it pink so as to make you come get me and prevent you from accepting such a hideous gift)!

May the Ancestors bless you and keep your spirit in good health so we may be sweetly reunited again.

May the Ancestors bless you and look after your spirit so your blade may swiftly strike down your enemies.

Signed,

Your Terribly Restless, Bored, and Miserable Wife

Ps- Seriously, I will make you that pink scarf and I will make you wear it. In public. In front of ALL your friends. Don't think I won't.

Pss- I really do want to drive my sword through that bastard's bowels. I think it would be a rather exquisite revenge.

Cín Rian,

Mîrvana

Hiei always found it entertaining that she always used the lovers' prayer before the warrior's prayer. Relationships come after the fighting ends, he supposed. He scanned over the contents of her letter again and smirked at the scarf comments. She definitely would make him wear it, somehow. She always made good on her threats. Hiei finished eating before turning to the package. He ripped off the brown package paper and a fluffy navy blue scarf spilled out. He put it around his neck but the scarf was still on the ground. Kami, woman! How big of a scarf did she make?

Hiei went to the bathroom to the mirror and, making sure the ends were even, began to wrap it around his neck. He wrapped it a solid four times before the scarf's end was at his waist. Tch, she must be bored. Still, he was able to arrange the scarf so it wasn't swallowing him so that was a plus. He fingered the ends and noticed a different color thread on the other side. Turning the end over, in gold knitting was his name in kanji. Or at least was supposed to be. The kanji was barely legible. He turned over the other side to see a heart stitched with her name in elvish underneath. The elvish was a bit better but not by much.

He walked back into the room and unraveled the scarf from around his neck. He folded it neatly and, with the letter, placed it in the drawer with the other two letters she sent him. A month and half had passed since he last saw her. Most of Mitage's forces were dealt with and now it was a matter of getting into his castle that was in the middle of that damn lake. Mîra should be well enough to join the fight. They would need all the help they could get. Of course, he also wanted to see his mate. The first day without her presence was irritating and now it was uncomfortable. He didn't know how Yusuke spent three years away from Keiko while he was at war, being away from Mîra for this long was driving him mad.

Hiei thought he heard Koku giggling at him but he ignored it and proceeded to Mukuro's chambers. Hiei ran into Honjo, who looked flushed. He bowed quickly and Hiei eyed him suspiciously. The wolf seemed nervous… That was odd.

"I didn't think you of all demons would be shaken after such a simple battle," Hiei said as flatly as he could.

Pride reared up in Honjo's face. "As if, Heika."

"So then, it is a woman?"

"I- what, my Lord?"

"Your idiotic nervousness and the flush in your cheeks. Either you're sick or it's a woman."

Honjo looked at him surprised but then grinned slyly. "Speaking from experience, Heika?"

"Quiet," Hiei growled. He stalked past the chuckling wolf demon that fell in line behind him. When they were out of the corridor, Hiei stopped.

"You have my permission. But if you hurt her I'll break your fucking neck."

"What? My Lord, what are you talking about?" Honjo asked, shocked. Hiei turned around, forcing himself not to roll his eyes.

"Maria. You do a poor job of hiding your affections. Why you would even bother is beyond me."

Honjo's eyes widened and he thumped his arm across his chest and bowed deeply. "Thank you, Heika. I promise you I will treat her with the love and care she deserves."

"Like a queen," Hiei directed.

"No," Honjo said. His eyes glowed fiercely as he continued, "Like a goddess."

Hiei eyed him curiously. "Do you love her?"

"More than anything, my Lord. She is the air that I breathe, the sun that lights enables my affections to grow by day, and the moon that illuminates the path at night. She is my redemption and-"He stopped and scratched the back of his head, embarrassed. "I apologize, Heika. I am getting a bit carried away."

Hiei could only stare at the demon in awe. To profess such things for someone else, such dependence was unnerving to Hiei. But if that was alright with Honjo, then Hiei had no issue. "I am pleased that you value her greatly. Maria has been with me a long time. She deserves happiness."

"Thank you, Heika," he said sincerely. "The reason we didn't tell you is because Maria didn't want you to think she wanted to leave your service. We both wish to continue serving you, Heika."

The fealty touched him and he was secretly glad. He didn't need Maria, or Claudia, but around the fortress they were a big help and, well, they were good friends. "Good," Hiei responded. They continued walking but Honjo walked beside him now. Hiei did not mind, he never told the demon to walk behind him.

"How is Mîra no Kimi? Will she return to battle soon, Heika?"

"She is well but wishes to come to the fight. I intend to talk to Mukuro about retrieving her today."

"That is excellent! No one can rally up troops like she can." Hiei's eyes slid upward to the wolf demon. "After you, of course," Honjo added quickly.

"Don't lie to me, Honjo," Hiei said.

"Very well, Heika."

The remainder of the walk was spent in silence. When Hiei arrived at Mukuro's quarters, he entered. She was lounging lazily in her large throne as she ate from a plate to the side of her. Kirin stood to her right silently with his arms crossed. Hiei sat down in the chair across from her and kicked his legs up on the table. Honjo stood behind him silently.

Hiei did not say anything as he watched her eat. He needed to wait for the right time. The last conversation Mukuro and Mîra shared still irked the former king. Only after Mukuro brought up ideas for taking down Mitage's fortress could he mention his mate. The two women loathed each other just as much as they, begrudgingly, respected each other.

"You were at Mitage's palace," Mukuro said before she sipped her drink.

"There is no path to the island unless he, or someone who can move the earth, raises the pathway. Inside water runs through every hallway and every room."

"That means there is an opening in every room and in the exterior. Exit tunnels?"

"None that I know of."

"Any other advantages?"

"He keeps a harem." Hiei paused for a moment. "I did not interact with them but Mîra was given a bath by his women. She may know more than I do." Mukuro's blue eye stared at him for a moment before turning back to her food. Hiei decided to continue speaking while she was thinking.

Mukuro paused for a moment as she reached for another piece of meat. Then her motions continued but she did not look at Hiei. With a wave of her free hand, Kirin walked to Hiei and handed him a piece of paper.

"The latest report," the demon rumbled before returning to his master's side.

Frowning Hiei opened the report and scanned the contents. Not sure of what he read, he re-read the report more closely. As his eyes passed over the words, he could feel his gut slowly sinking. By the time he read it a third time through, he felt tired and heavy as though he was carrying large boulders on his back.

Mukuro spoke quietly. "Take as much time as you need."

Hiei stood abruptly. "I will return as soon as possible." Wordlessly shoving the paper into Honjo's chest he walked out of the room. Hiei's only thought as he packed was how quickly he could get to Genkai's. Just as he was about to leave, Maria entered the room.

"Hiei-sama I- Do you wish me to accompany you?" Maria asked. Hiei could tell she was trying to keep from prying but she was not bothering to mask her worries. The dog demoness stood with her hand neatly folded in front of her as usual but her tail swished back and forth restlessly and her lips were pulled into a frown.

"No," he said shortly. Maria's visage fell, disappointed. Damnit, she was only trying to help. "But prepare the room for Mîra and I for when we return."

Her face did not lighten but she looked less disappointed than before. She bowed deeply and said, "As you wish, Hiei-sama. Safe travels. Please send my regards to my sister, Shana and Yukina-hime."

He nodded in response and without further delay headed from the centipede to the human world. As he ran, he thought of ways to bring up the contents of the report. Should he do it right away or should he wait until after he got settled in? Time was of the essence but he would be at Genkai's for at least one night anyway. What difference did it make if he explained everything right when he first got there or if he waited until later in the night?

For one, it meant he got to see her bright smile and hear her melodic laughter before they were snatched away by… him. Hiei halted in his tracks on top of a tree branch. He was going to deliver the news. He was going to cause her pain and she would undoubtedly cry. His insides wrenched at the thought. Why was it that no matter how hard he tried, he could never seem to make her happy? Would he ever? Could he ever?

'Keep moving forward, Master,' Koku whispered.

Her voice pulled him out of his thoughts. Hiei took off again, Koku was right. He though he heard her whine in protest but it must have been his imaginings. Words to say to his wife formulated in his mind as he ran but nothing sounded good and there was no way to soften the blow. He had to tell her outright. The thought pained him gravely and he had half a mind to turn around and find some way to stop it without her knowing. That is, if there was a way to stop it. But if anyone would know how, it would be Mîra.

He arrived at Genkai's around midday but used Koku's power to cloak his energy from his mate. Staying within the cover of the woods, he pulled of the bandana over his Jagan and searched for her. He found her sitting in the courtyard doing something with- was that? Damnit! He knew she was going to start the scarf in that nauseating color! His mate suddenly perked up, scanning her surroundings. She cast a glance over her shoulder and she pouted cutely, thinking. Then, just before Hiei was going to close his Jagan, she suddenly became excited, grinning widely. Hiei closed his Jagan. She knew he was here.

Hiei walked through the front doors of the temple, expecting to see his mate still sitting in the courtyard but all he found was Shizuru smoking a cigarette. He never had any qualms with the woman; in fact she was probably the most tolerable female in their odd group, other than Yukina of course. She seemed to be sizing him up and down with concern in her eyes which would normally not have bothered Hiei. This woman, however, was the one person other than Hiei who was privileged with Mîra's deepest and darkest secrets so if Shizuru was looking at him that way, it meant something was wrong with his wife.

Shizuru took a long drag of her cigarette and blew the smoke out slowly. "I'm supposed to be distracting you."

Distracting? Hiei was about to ask the woman what she meant when he felt a presence to his side.

"Papa!"

Hiei turned and caught Shana as she popped out of the shadows. Instantly her arms went around his neck and Hiei relaxed if only for a moment. The child pulled away from him and he was relieved to see the shining smile on her face.

"Papa, I've missed you! Mîra-hime won't allow me to do work so I've been playing with Ryuji." She grinned mischievously, a fang poking through. "He's not very good at hide and seek." Hiei's initial reaction was to reprimand her. How could his child be reduced to simple human games when she should be strengthening herself? Then, he realized that Shana did not walk the same path he did as a child. She did not live in a world where she was forced to survive day in and day out. If anything, she lived in an environment that was the exact opposite. Hiei set her down and intended to ask her about Mîra when he was distracted by another voice.

"Oniichan!"

Faster than he had ever known her to be, Hiei suddenly found his sister practically throwing herself at him as she wrapped her arms around his neck. He returned the hug contentedly and was warmed by his sister's enthusiastic reception. He noticed Shana made it safely out of the strike zone and was beaming up at the sight of them. Yukina drew back and her ruby eyes anxiously bore into him as she asked, "How are you? How is the war?"

"I am fine. It's not really a war but-"

"What about Yusuke! How is he?" Suddenly Keiko was next to him, leering over him anxiously like a wave that was about to crash.

"I don't know. I haven't seen him," Hiei responded flatly.

Keiko's face turned red as her eyes narrowed. "What do you mean you haven't-"

"HIIEEIIII! Tell me about Kurama!" Boton whined. Interrupting Keiko, she latched onto his arm and pouted in her stupid cat face. Damnit, he was here to see his mate and-

"Excuse me? How's a woman supposed to see her husband with all these other women attached to him?"

Mîra's voice cut the chatter instantly and the three women stepped out of the way and Hiei could finally see his mate. She was standing on the wooden steps, smiling coyly with a hand on her hip. Her pristine hair bounced lightly, her lavender eyes sparkled and her visage was radiant as she began to walk towards him. Her movements were smooth as she walked down the steps, as though she was walking on a cloud. His eyes locked with hers and he could see the excitement and joy for his return and soon, her departure. As she took his hands in hers, he decided there was no way he could destroy her glowing aura. Not at this moment. Right now, he was going to burn the image in his mind so he could never forget it.

"My Herven, I thank the Ancestors for your safe return and I pray you bring good news of your exploits," Mîra said formally. She brought his hand to her lips and she kissed them each lightly.

"I hope you have been well," He replied.

Mîra let out a dramatic sigh. "I am well but I have been reduced to knitting," she leaned forward and whispered, "and cooking!"

"I heard that!" Keiko snapped.

Mîra ignored her and continued, "I have greatly appreciated the company and while it was nice catching up with our dear friends and family, I hate sitting around here helplessly like a simple woman, waiting for your return."

"Since when is that a bad thing!?" Keiko demanded.

Mîra turned sharply to the woman. "I am a warrior! I was raised for battle and it is where the years of my tutelage come to fruition. Sitting here is useless for me because this is not where I belong!"

"Just because we aren't warriors doesn't mean we are sitting here uselessly! Who else takes care of the home and our children?" Keiko argued.

"Trusted family members, advisors and servants," Mîra immediately responded.

Keiko's jaw dropped in shock, her face beet red. "You think you're so high and mighty but-"

"Ahahaha!" Boton laughed nervously. Her hand was clamped over Keiko's mouth. "I think we'll go inside and leave you two alone for a while."

The courtyard cleared quickly and Mîra rolled her eyes, annoyed. "I don't know what her problem is." She flipped her hair over her shoulder and smiled at him. "Anyway, what do you think? My hair was so dreadfully short, Shizuru took me to a salon and got it styled! Do you like it?"

Now that she pointed it out, he noticed the way her hair was flipped to one side and seemed to round out to the curve of her face. Examining her more, he noticed she was wearing a simple green human dress that came to her knees. The dress was cinched under her bosom had short ruffles over her shoulders for sleeves. The neckline was a bowl cut, tastefully showing off her curves. She wore gold flats and to match, a gold and emerald pendent around her neck and similar colored jewelry in her ears. He knew she loathed green and that she was wearing it specifically for him. He appreciated the gesture but he felt no need to express it, yet.

"As long as you aren't bitching about it, the style doesn't matter to me," Hiei said. He pretended to be uninterested knowing her response.

"I rushed to get ready and this is how you thank me after not seeing your beautiful wife for more than a month?" She turned on her heel so her back was to him. "I guess you don't want your surprise then."

Surprise? But before he could ask she was already walking away. Hiei couldn't help but smirk. Damn woman knew his curiosity would be peaked. He followed behind her closely as she walked. When she slid the sliding door open to her room her eyes flickered down to down to him slyly for a moment before entering the room. Feeling the more than welcome heat rise in him he entered the room and closed the sliding door.

Her hands were behind her back and she was smirking playfully. "Hm, I suppose the fact that you will never have to wear this doesn't relieve you in the least bit." She pulled out the ungodly bright pink scarf. "It is a slight shame because I would have loved for your friends to have-"

Growling Hiei grabbed her and crushed his lips against hers. He could feel her smile as he kissed her. As he lowered her to the floor she whispered in his ear, "Don't worry, I have another surprise for you." Hiei thoroughly enjoyed his surprise and her. Much more time than he would have liked passed since he last lay with her and too long since he refreshed his mark. But the part he missed the most was after, when they were relaxing and basking in each other's sweat, scents, and the feeling of his bare skin simply touching hers.

Hiei was relaxing in his preferred spot, his head nestled on her bosom as her fingers ran through his hair. He closed his eyes and enjoyed the sweet lavender of his mate's scent.

"So, did you like your surprise?" his wife asked him humorously.

"Well enough. You know I prefer it on the floor."

"I spent a lot of time picking out that lingerie, you know!" she complained lightly.

Hiei took her hand in his and intertwined his fingers with hers. "Hn."

"Not a word, Herven."

Hiei smirked lightly as he rubbed his thumb against her smooth hand. He stared at their hands intertwined and his smirk relaxed into a smile. He was reunited with his mate once again. A comfortable silence settled as he stared at their hands, when he noticed something was off. Frowning, he pulled their hands closer to him and then he scowled.

He sat up abruptly and examined the top of her arm and then the bottom. Her arm was completely smooth. Then, the magic rippled away and Hiei's eyes widened. The fleshy pink pigment of the skin on her arms and hands were grotesquely warped. Mîra sat up and stared at her arms sadly.

"I didn't want to scare any of the women. I had to show Yukina so she could help heal me but… My hands were always rough from my sword play. That's not what a proper noble woman's hands should feel like but at least they looked it," she said quietly.

Hiei gently kissed her hand and proceeded to gently place kisses along her arm. When he reached the end of the scarring he looked up at her tenderly. She gave him a ghost of a smile. Perhaps this was what Shizuru was apprehensive about. Mîra was having a hard time adjusting to her injuries. This made sense, Mîra was a vain woman who cared a great deal about her looks.

"Vesse," he said quietly. She looked up at him curiously. He tucked her hair behind her ear and an unsettling feeling spread through him. The reunion with his mate pushed the thoughts of Mitage and the report out of his mind entirely but now it was seeping back into his mind like poison. He wanted to tell her she was beautiful, that he didn't care about her arms and as long as they still held her sword proudly, he never would. But he was afraid if he talked everything about the report would spill out and their moment of serenity would end. So instead, he leaned in and kissed her gently.

When the kiss broke Mîra pressed her forehead against his, just above the Jagan. "Hiei," she breathed. Kami, he would never get over the way she said his name. "I-I really-" She paused and took a deep breath. Hiei did not mind. He could be patient for her words to come. She exhaled and he felt her fingers brush against his chest as she held her crystal in her fingers.

"I love you."

The words took a moment for Hiei to register. He wasn't sure what he was expecting her to say but it wasn't that. He did not believe in love. At least, he did not believe in the word. Did he believe in the actions associate with it? If so, then what was he to call the elation that rose through him and the small, painful stab in his heart?

Mîra drew back from him and blinked, surprised. Then she laughed. "I never thought I would feel so relieved to finally say those words! Ancestors know I've been trying for some time now!" She paused and smiled at him. "Herven, you look like you're seeing me for the first time."

His hand instinctively wrapped around the gems that hung from his neck. They did not provide the solace he sought and Mîra placed her hand on his cheek. He suddenly felt nervous and unsure of how to behave or what words he should think about saying. How was he supposed to respond? How could he respond? He would not repeat the words back to her, he didn't think he ever would, but he also knew his lack of response would hurt her.

Mîra's hand moved to his lips and her fingers fanned across them. "Shh," she said gently. "You don't have to say anything or do anything. I just wanted to tell you. I-" In her pause, Hiei felt the stinging inside of him worsen.

"All I ask," She began, "Is for you to care for me. Spar with me, jest with me, make love to me, hold me, be there for me." Mîra moved closer to him and he closed his eyes as he rubbed her nose against his.

"Whatever you do, Hiei, don't give up on me. I want to be with you. I love you," she whispered. He felt her lips gently connect with his but the high was wearing off as the pain in him worsened.

He drew back from her embrace and found himself saying, "You shouldn't."

"Mmm too late," she said lightly. She leaned in again but he pulled back. The hurt was visibly reflected in her concerned eyes and her frown. "Herven, what is it?"

He could not speak. The twisting pain was agonizing.

"Hiei, listen to me." She cupped his face in her cool hands. "I don't know what's going on in the Makai but I do know that if we stick together we will get through this. You and I. Don't forget that."

Kami, why did Mîra tell him that she loved him? How did they get here? From loathing, to tolerance, to affection, and now this? Damnit, she loved him. He was the one person she valued and trusted above all others. And how was he going to repay her devotion, her faith?

Hiei stared her straight in her eyes.

"Mitage is closing the portal to your world."

He was going to crush her.

Translation Notes:

Cin Rian- Your Queen