Chapter 38: Clearing the Fog

Hiei liked prepping for the tournament. He was secluded, but not too far from the fortress, and he had a rigid routine. Every morning he woke up with the sunrise and meditated with Koku. Then he ate a light breakfast and worked his muscles and strength until lunchtime. After lunch he worked on swordplay and after dinner, he worked on techniques with Koku. The routine was evenly balanced and allowed him to touch a little of what was important each day. All he needed to do was rinse and repeat.

Being gone from the fortress for a considerable amount of time, however, always led to the occasional interruption. Honjo came by with a monthly status and Kurama brought Yukina and Sakura by every once and awhile. The young Koorime was still upset that Hiei wasn't at the fortress and tried to convince him to return every time she visited, but Hiei finally convinced Yukina to let her train in martial arts so that appeased the young girl a little bit.

Simran also came by with updates and from her intel, it seemed that the gang was quieting down. The crime rate in the Makai tended to dramatically lower as the tournament approached. The chance to win and become known as the most powerful demon in the Makai was enticing enough to let the higher class demons take time to hone their skills. Hiei wasn't surprised but he was glad. Simran continued to track and ambush any demons that came by but no significant progress had been made.

Then there were his favorite visitors, Shana and Ryuji. When Ryuji first arrived at the fortress as a fresh twenty something, Hiei immediately assigned him to Shana. The Boy spent most of his life in the human world and Hiei didn't spend enough time doing anything consistent so Shana was the perfect escort. Not only that but Ryuji wasn't much of a fighter. He could, if he needed to, but he didn't prefer to. Instead, he would rather play his guitar or find someway to be useful. Putting him with Shana was perfect and the two were usually inseparable; Where Shana went, for the most part, he went. This allowed Ryuji to understand the inner workings of the fortress and learn about the Makai.

While Hiei was worried about the Boy's wanton ways, he and Shana made the perfect team. His demoness was mischievous and liked to cause trouble in the human world from time to time and Ryuji, having inherited most of Keiko's sensibilities, helped keep her in check. Hiei enjoyed having them around and in a way, Hiei felt like Ryuji was also one of his own. He would never admit it to Yusuke, but he was secretly glad that he preferred the fortress over the barren wasteland Raizen called home.

On a comfortable summer night, Ryuji and Shana dropped by to say hello. Hiei kept the small fire going and Koku laid stretched out on her back around the campsite. Shana toasted some Makai fruit as a dessert and Ryuji strummed the strings of his guitar. According to Yukina and Sakura's last visit, the two were arguing more than usual but they seemed fine now. Hiei wondered what it was about but Shana would come to him to talk about it when she was ready.

"So, Papa, Ryuji and I went to New York and saw this new show! It was really awesome and the music was great! Then we tried to go shopping but it's so hard with the new arm chips they're implementing in America and Ryuji forgot our fake Japanese IDs." She was leaning against him and flipping through her holo-camera, showing him the pictures around the city. "Oh here's us on the streets in Times Square! I love how all the lights are on at night!"

"Did you show him the pictures of those demons we met?" Ryuji asked.

"No not yet, let me see… here they are! Apparently there's a whole demon underground that has sprung up in New York and a couple demons own a bar. Demons and humans are allowed inside but it's mostly only humans that have spiritual awareness. It's a pretty neat place and they even import Yoshi's ale there!"

She showed him pictures of the bar, which were pretty interesting. "How did you get to America?" Hiei asked. Shana traveled there before but he knew she didn't go often.

Shana sighed dramatically and Ryuji shook his head. "It was hell," he responded. "Seriously, we had to go really far north to find the stupid barrier edge. That only got us to Maine. Then we had to travel from there all the way down and then back when we wanted to return."

"We got some good pictures though," Shana prompted optimistically.

"We did. Still, I don't feel like making that trip again anytime soon," Ryuji said.

Hiei frowned. "You made that entire trip without money?" He realized that Shana wasn't about to pay for everything considering she could pop in and out of places with Ryuji easily, but usually when they went shopping or ate they abided by the laws.

"Yeah it was fine," Shana said. "Oh! Here's a picture of us at the Statue of Liberty! I got us up on top of the crown!"

Hiei pushed the picture aside, "Doing things like that will attract Koenma's attention. Again."

"We'll be fine. Besides, Ryuji is the son and brother of famous Spirit Detectives," Shana responded.

"Yeah but in America they think they're all cowboys. It's totally different, Shana," Ryuji said.

"Whatever. Besides, it's not like we stole the Bill of Independence," She replied.

"It's the Declaration of Independence and no, thank Kami you decided not to steal that after what I went through after you decided to take the original Constitution," Ryuji said. Oh yes, Hiei forgot about that one.

"What? It was a good practical joke-"

"That ended up with me being detained and nearly tortured while you were skipping around free!"

"They didn't touch you and I got it back in time. Besides, the commotion it caused was hilarious! It was totally worth it!"

Ryuji pointed his finger at her, "You are crazy."

"Don't lie, you love it," she grinned. Ryuji slowly grinned before returning to his guitar.

"So anyway, Papa-what?" She frowned at Hiei.

"Stay out of trouble and keep Ryuji out of your antics," Hiei scolded, glaring at her.

"Fine." She stuck out her tongue playfully. "Now finish looking at my pictures." Hiei did just that. Soon Shana's voice, the strums of a guitar, and the occasional sound of munching on the cooked fruit added to the peaceful sounds of the night. Hiei particularly liked the picture of her and Ryuji on the island with the statue. They looked like they were having fun, as they should. He liked seeing them in moments like this, where they didn't have to worry about fighting or training or some problem or issue. They were seeing the world unconstrained. He was glad he was able to help bring Shana into a world where she could do that and he hoped Sakura would also exist in the same world. In the Makai, they would always need to be ready to fight, but they didn't have to worry about it all the time anymore.

As Shana finished, Ryuji pulled out their sleeping bags. Shana went to wash off in the nearby stream and Ryuji got comfortable with his guitar again. Hiei leaned against Koku, just under her rib cage where her belly was nice and soft. Her tail flopped as he leaned against her but she slept on.

"Hey Gramps, I ran into Simran the other day," Ryuji started. "Are you into her or not?"

Hiei glared at him. "That's none of your business." Of course he had to bring it up. The benefit of his training routine was that he was left no mental room for contemplation or the other things that plagued him. For the past few months, he hadn't thought about Simran, her, or anything else and it was relaxing.

Ryuji stared at him for a moment before returning to his guitar, picking lightly. "She's a nice girl, you know. Tou-san says that you're still too in love with your old mate to move on and I just, I don't know. To care about someone so deeply over so many years and pass up someone like Simran seems so incredible."

Hiei didn't respond, and he wasn't sure what to say. Ryuji stopped playing and ran his hand through his dark hair. "My Mom was convinced that she was going to come back. She said they argued from time to time but there was no doubt in her mind that you two were made for each other. Tou-san says that he and Kaasan were made for each other but I guess since she's dead he can move on."

"Keiko and Kaneko are very different," Hiei said quietly.

"I know," Ryuji replied. He paused and his face glazed over for a moment before he responded, "I guess I always thought that he would be like Raizen and never fall in love again."

"That's what he thought too," Hiei said. So this conversation wasn't really about him, that was good to know.

"I just… I don't know. My point in all this was that I think your dedication is amazing, and I hope that I'm as dedicated to the person I love as you are to your mate."

The Boy returned to his guitar, humming quietly, and Hiei was surprised at his response. The Boy enjoyed the company of women but it didn't occur to Hiei that he was in love with someone. If he was in love, why did he spend his time with other women? He always behaved that way, even before coming to the Makai, but why continue if there was one person he cared about?

Hiei didn't have an answer, nor did he feel like probing the Boy. Chatting with him about the subject, though, made him feel different and the knot inside of him at the mention of her wasn't present. "There's no one like her," he said. He wasn't sure why he spoke or why it didn't hurt like it usually did. Instead he just felt relieved, like he was letting go of the large weight he usually carried by saying those words.

Ryuji looked up at him and smiled. "I remember her a little. She used to play with me, and Mom said it was to get out of the kitchen."

Hiei couldn't help a small smirk. "That's exactly what happened." Ryuji chuckled and went back to his guitar. He didn't ask anymore questions but for some reason, thinking about her and talking about her with Ryuji didn't make him feel as empty as it usually did. Why?

"That water feels so nice right now!" Shana exclaimed as she walked back up to the camp.

"We could go for a midnight swim," Ryuji suggested, a wolfish grin on his face.

Shana rolled her eyes at him. "Ew, no, we're not skinny dipping."

Ryuji pretended to be brokenhearted and Shana got settled into her sleeping bag. "Oh shut up and actually sing a song," she said.

He made a face at her, which she made back, and he grinned, "Fine. Just for you." Turning his attention to the instrument, he began to strum a soft tune. His voice gently joined in and they listened peacefully. Hiei wasn't sure where Ryuji inherited the talent, it definitely didn't come from Yusuke, but it was pleasant most of the time. He didn't particularly care to be around when his band practiced.

Hiei cast a glance over at Shana, who was watching Ryuji with a soft expression. Her eyes started to open and close slowly as she was lulled to sleep. Hiei glanced back at Ryuji and his thoughts drifted to their conversation. Ryuji wanted to be as devoted as he was… Hiei never saw his years of anguish and longing that way. But, didn't he just say there was no one like her? Usually thinking about her was difficult and talking was worse, but not tonight. Tonight, just thinking about her smile in the picture warmed him. He remembered how happy they were, and it was a pleasant feeling.

Hiei looked up at the stars. Looking up, he couldn't help but hope that she stared up the same sky, reminiscing fondly. The notion was foolish and idiotic, but just for right now he wanted to believe. He sighed and brought his gaze down to Ryuji again. Hiei realized his hand pulled the cord forward with her stone. The crystal was warm in his palm, and he liked to think it meant she was happy ruling somewhere ordering servants about and making important decisions. He could imagine it now, everyone scurrying about as she barked orders; he almost chuckled at the thought.

But he couldn't think that way anymore. She wasn't here. He had to move on, but how? Yusuke would never forget Keiko or stopped loving her but there he was falling for someone else. Maybe the key wasn't trying to forget. Maybe he just had to accept the fact that he needed her, but she needed her home and that was okay. Hiei didn't feel satisfied with sentiment but it was better than where he was before. He leaned his head back into Koku and closed his eyes, focusing on the sound of Ryuji's voice to help clear his mind for sleep…

~*0*~

He felt small as he stood, staring into the empty abyss. There was nothing, only pitch black darkness. He tried blink once, then twice but his vision was no better. He tried to see with his Jagan but it was to no avail. He closed his eyes and tried to listen around him but all he could hear was a faint whisper reaching out to him that faded in and out. He could not grasp onto the whisper and it faded until he could hear it no longer. He was in a void of nothingness and he was alone.

Suddenly, all around him burst into flame. He began to sweat from the intense heat as the flames violently danced around him and the stench of blood and smoke filled his nostrils. The fire was closing in on him and fear took hold as he began to run, avoiding falling stone and wood. He could out run the flames! He was faster than the wind itself! But the flames were hot on his heels and they seemed to reach towards him like hands, waiting to pull him under. A lick of fire wrapped around his heel and he screamed as he burned and fell to the ground.

He pushed himself up to try and start running again but he was no longer surrounded by flames. Instead he clutched himself as he shivered violently, now standing on the edge of a cliff. The dark abyss waited below and above was only grey. The wind mixed with ice whipped around him harshly and he had to squint to see. Afraid of falling over, he took a step backwards but ran into something. He turned around and looked up to see an old woman in a black kimono glaring down at him. His eyes went wide as she snarled at him with disgust and raised her right leg. He screamed as she kicked him over the edge and down, down, down…

Then, he felt something warm beneath him and the cold went away. He was no longer falling and everything around him felt warm and bright. He opened his eyes to see Mîra in white smiling down at him softly. "Every thing's okay," her melodic voice told him. Then she kissed his brow and said, "You don't have to worry anymore." Then he was on the ground in a grassy area by a lake. He spotted Koku on the pier, kicking her legs in the water as she strummed a guitar. He sat down next to her and she smiled at him as she continued to sing a soothing tune.

Hiei laid back on the pier and stared up at the blue sky. He didn't know his darkness could produce something so bright. His darkness was soothing but this place was nice too. Nice and… happy, he decided as a warmth filled him.

He forgot how nice it felt to be happy.

~*0*~

The hot summer turned to crisp fall and fall into the sharpness of winter. During that time, Hiei felt stronger and the countless nights pondering since that particular visit from Shana and Ryuji made him feel closer to figuring out how to find the balance in his life once again. He wasn't in a perfect place, but he realized he wasn't as alone as he felt. He also felt closer to Koku, who was happily singing much more than usual, and their connection was stronger as a result.

He took his time in returning to the fortress, enjoying his walk through the empty orchard with the looming stone fortress in the background. The morning was still dark but the sun was starting to come up which gave the fortress a picturesque look. He continued on and decided to surprise Sakura before she awoke. He snuck quietly into the fortress and through the winding corridors to her room. He quietly opened her door and slipped inside.

Hiei's heart warmed at the sight of his niece sleeping soundly peacefully surrounded by thick blankets and pillows, even though winter was the most pleasant time of year for her. He sat down on the bed and shook her gently.

"Mmm, stooop, I don't wanna get up yet," she moaned.

"Sakura," he said.

Groggily, she sat up trying to open her eyes. "Ji-chan?" she asked, still sounding out of it.

"You're not going to sleep the day away are you?" He asked.

Her red eyes opened wide and her face lit up. "Ji-chan! You're home!" she cried and threw her arms around him. He wrapped his arms around his niece as she exclaimed, "I missed you so much!"

Hiei smiled at her. "I missed you too," he responded. "Let's get some breakfast."

"Yeah!" Sakura scrambled off him, pulling on her robe and slippers. He took her hand in hers and they walked through the fortress together. The stone walls that surrounded him didn't feel cold, like they used to. There were old memories, like Yukina said months ago, but that's all they were now: memories. He thought about Yukina sleeping soundly, Shana snoring loudly with blankets completely askew, and Ryuji drooling on his pillow. He thought about Honjo, Maria, and their cubs, Claudia, and Fudo. Of course, Kurama was already up and dressed in the dining room, smiling them as they came through the door.

"Welcome home," he said.

Hiei gave his friend a nod, but Sakura stopped in her tracks. She looked upward at Hiei with round puppy eyes and a ridiculous pout. "Ji-chan, I don't have to do studies today do I? You just got home."

"Of course not," he replied.

"Yes! Hah!" She cried, pointing a finger at Kurama. "I win Kurama-sensei!"

Kurama sighed dramatically as he picked up his tea. "I suppose so." Sakura smugly strutted over to the table and Hiei sat next to her. "Of course," the fox continued, "I'm sure your uncle will love to hear about how often you've tried skipping out on lessons."

Sakura stuck her tongue out at him. "Meanie!" She served herself pancakes while Hiei poured her some juice.

Kurama chuckled and turned to Hiei. "She's gotten quite crafty. I must say it's a challenge. Although, creative skipping methods seemed to increase after Yusuke's last visit…"

"I fwuf kmnn whrr yrr-"

"Chew first," Hiei commanded.

Sakura swallowed her pancakes. "I don't know what you're talking about!"

Kurama simply chuckled and Hiei ate while Sakura and Kurama filled him in on what he missed. Sometime later, Yukina joined them and Hiei was glad to see his sister. He was hoping Shana and Ryuji would come soon but there was no sight of them by the time everyone finished. With a promise to Sakura he would watch her during karate practice later, he and Kurama walked to the library.

When Hiei entered, he stared at their red couch and decided that's where he was going to sit. Kurama sat down opposite of him, staring at him curiously.

"You seem to be in good spirits, Hiei," Kurama observed.

Hiei leaned back into the couch. Her scent was faded but that was okay. He looked up at his friend who was patiently waiting. "It's good to be home," he responded.

Kurama smiled. "I'm glad to hear that."

A silence fell over them and Hiei stared at the fabric, running his fingers across it slowly. The threads were worn down but he couldn't bring himself to let Yukina upholster the couch.

"Hiei? Something wrong?" Kurama asked.

Hiei felt the familiar ache inside of him but it wasn't as bad as before. Hiei wasn't sure what changed but he felt better and he was content in the fortress. It wasn't the same happiness as when he was with Mîra, but he still felt good. That was good enough for him.

"No, I'm fine," he answered. "Are you participating in the tournament?"

"No, not this time."

"Good, now I don't have to humiliate you in front of the demon realm as I make my way to the top," Hiei smirked.

Kurama arched an eyebrow. "You have your mind set on being King again?"

"Why not? I've loitered around for long enough. The current king doesn't know what the hell he's doing so now's the best time."

A devious sparkle lit in Kurama's emerald eyes. "Well if that's the case, maybe I will enter. After all, if you can't beat me then there's no way you should be king."

"Bring it," Hiei smirked.

Hiei and Kurama sat there for some time catching up and talking before watching Sakura at her practice. He was very proud of her resolve and will, and she reminded him of Kuwabara. Shana and Ryuji joined him at the practice and he ate with her separately, happy to see his demoness. She wasn't completely opening up to him, but she would come to him on her own time, as always.

Nothing was perfect: Yukina looked a little sad when he mentioned Sakura reminded him of Kuwabara, Shana and Ryuji seemed to be on edge, Kurama seemed a bit tired, and Hiei still saw Mîra's ghost. At least they were all together, safe and whole. They wouldn't be happy all the time, but they were home and that's what mattered most.

I know, I've been bad to all of you and I'm sorry. Grad school happened, then I decided to replay Mass Effect all the way through and those of you that follow me can see the fan fic affair I'm currently having with the game (but you should read that too!). You should all know that I am not giving up on Spoils of War, ever, no matter how long the break. This story is my baby and I'm really excited to move towards the tournament and getting deeper into Hiei and Simran's investigation.

Thank you for all the patience, favorites, follows, reads, and reviews!