Gingerbread was in the oven, Cyborg was plugged into the wall to top off his battery charge, and Robin was scribbling on a large whiteboard, half-covered by a map, whilst his teammates watched from the sofa.

"So," he said, turning around suddenly and tapping the board with the end of his pen. "Twelve days of Christmas. Judging by this pattern, the next attack will have something to do with day nine: ladies dancing. Any ideas where they might strike?"

"Maybe a night club?" Cyborg suggested. "Or a ballroom? Is there a ballroom in Jump City?"

Robin rapped the pen against the map. "Three nightclubs. Here, here, and here. No ballrooms, but the town hall does throw a dance once a year."

"Ooh, I know!" Beast Boy piped up, bouncing in his seat. "On ninth street there's a strip club!"

"A 'strip club'?" Starfire repeated.

Beast Boy nodded. "Yeah, Sugar and Spice!" His grin gradually faded as he realised Raven, Cyborg and Robin were staring at him suspiciously.

"How do you know about that strip club?" Robin asked, frowning.

"You're a little young, aren't you?" Cyborg added. Beast Boy flushed and muttered something inaudible.

Robin twiddled his pen around his fingers. "We should go to the car. Drive by a few of these places, see if they're worth investigating. Either way, we should be getting an alarm anytime now. Let's go."

Cyborg unplugged the his charger and trooped after the others back down to the garage. They climbed into the car and drove into the city, listening to the poor radio hosts trying to sound enthusiastic about being up before the sun in between Christmas carols.

The first two nightclubs were closed, doors locked, and as Raven pointed out that at the previous crimes the doors had been open they moved on. The third nightclub, Champagne Corks, was locking up when the T-car stopped outside.

The snow was falling thick and fast now, coating the pavement and rooftops. One of the bouncers noticed the car and wandered over, bending down to peer through the window as Cyborg wound it down. "Evening, Titans. Everything all right?"

"For now," Robin replied. "Nothing suspicious happening here, is there?"

"Not in the last few hours I've been on shift," he said. "My brother works for the police force; he texted me about all the attacks tonight. You don't think something's gonna happen here, do you?"

"We're not sure yet. It's a possibility."

Raven leaned forward. "Is anyone still inside?"

The bounced blinked and nodded. "Yeah, it's just me and Bobby closing up. Why?"

"It won't be here." She sat back in her seat. "You can't have nine ladies dancing without any women to dance."

With a sigh of relief, the bouncer waved and headed back to the club, leaving the Titans to drive on. The streets of Jump City were so quiet that the Titans could hear Sugar and Spice before they could see it.

It was an older, detached building, set back from the road with a rickety staircase wrapped around one corner. From the outside it looked abandoned and run down, but red light and pounding music spilled through slits in the curtains, and two, large men were stationed by the front door.

"Do you reckon they're open?" Cyborg said with a snicker, parking just around the corner. Even though they were stopping a crime, it would not do well for their car to be seen outside a strip club.

Robin pursed his lips. "It must be here." He stepped out of the car and approached the bouncers, who didn't acknowledge him until he was right in front of them, clearing his throat. The rest of his team stood awkwardly to the side.

"What do you want, kid?" grunted one bouncer, peering at him over the top of dark glasses.

"We need go inside," Robin said, taking up his 'power stance': arms folded, feet apart, back straight. "We have reason to believe there'll be an attack here tonight."

"Pfftch, not under our watch," snorted the second bouncer. "Get lost, kid."

"Unless you got ID," said the first. "You gotta be eighteen."

Robin's eyes narrowed. "I can't; that would give away my secret identity."

"Well then, looks like you can't go in."

"This is an emergency!" Robin insisted. "The crime could be happening right now! We're superheroes! You have to let us in."

"It's a strip joint," said the second bouncer. "Of course there's dodgy stuff happening. Now get lost, kid. All of you."

Growling, Robin stepped back from the building and rejoined his team. "This is ridiculous."

"Laws are laws," Cyborg said, shrugging. "We don't even know for sure that this is where it's going to happen."

"It is," said Raven. "Look over there." She nodded down the narrow alley squeezing between the strip club and the next building. The other Titans tread carefully to the mouth of the alley and peered down; a figure was skulking in the shadows.

"Is that Johnny Rancid?" Starfire asked. "Perhaps he is the perpetrator for this crime?"

Robin nodded. "I think you might be right."

Rancid appeared to be speaking on the phone then, after a few seconds, he disappeared behind a corner. A muffled bang like a door closing echoed down the alley.

"He's gone in the back," said Robin. "We have to get inside."

"But we're not old enough," Beast Boy pointed out, his ears drooping.

Cyborg smirked. "You're not."

"Are you?"

But Cyborg didn't reply. Instead, he walked around the corner, back to the car.

When he returned, he was wearing a grey hoodie and black jeans, and two silver rings. His electronic body parts were gone, replaced with what looked like fully human flesh. Cyborg gave a smirk and fished a card out of his pocket; a driver's license, though he didn't show it long enough for anyone to read it properly.

He breezed past his team and strode confidently to the bouncers. Without waiting to be asked, he held up the ID card.

The second bouncer took it and gave it a thorough examination, eyes flickering between the card and Cyborg's face. Finally, he sighed and handed it back then stepped away from the door. "Enjoy your evening," he grumbled.

One hand clenched around the communicator in his pocket, Cyborg entered the building.

Inside was what looked like a typical seedy club. Red and pink lights flashed sporadically from the ceiling. There was a long, thin stage extending half the length of the room, lined with poles and cages. Men in dark coats leered at scantily-clad ladies, who in turn draped themselves around their shoulders and stroked their faces. A few girls were on the stage, one on a pole and two more suspended in the cages, rocking their hips in time to the thunderous beat of the music.

A bar took up one wall, tended by two men in white shirts and red bow ties. A few more sat on high stools, sipping drinks and cheering whenever one of the dancers pulled off a particularly risqué move.

Cyborg had not been inside two seconds when a girl in a leopard print bikini leaned her cheek against his shoulder and caressed his arm. "Hello, handsome. Haven't seen you around before."

Cyborg laughed awkwardly and brushed her off, and tried avoid all eye contact with anyone. This proved rather difficult as with every step another girl would sidle up to him, pushing their assets and encouraging him to buy drinks or food.

"A little Christmas bonus for yourself," one cooed, twirling a lock of candy-red hair around her finger. "Go on…"

"I'm okay, thanks," he muttered, craning his neck to see the back corners of the club, shrouded in shade. Then he spotted a large body that could only be Johnny Rancid. "I've just seen someone I know, sorry, bye!"

Prying her hand from his elbow, Cyborg pushed his way through the club, eyes trained on the man at the back.

Rancid hadn't seen him. He was sitting alone at a table, tapping on his phone, with what looked like a suitcase propped against his leg. Nothing criminal appeared to be happening. Yet.

Cyborg settled down at another table nearby, hood up to cover his face, and waited.

Robin and the other Titans had retreated to the car. Starfire, in the front seat with Robin, was fiddling with the radio. She eventually settled on a station which played non-stop Latino music and happily danced in her seat whilst they waited for contact from Cyborg.

Robin was leaning forward, glaring at a brick wall, knowing those bouncers were on the other side, unaware. The bubbly music playing from the stereo came to an abrupt halt when the car phone began ringing. Robin answered it immediately.

"Hello?"

"Robin, it's Sgt. Miller again." His voice was slightly distorted by the speakers. "We've just had an anonymous tip off about a drug deal going down on ninth street. Johnny Rancid. The tip-off said they thought it was happening in some sort of club?"

Robin exchanged glances with his teammates. "Sugar and Spice?"

"Might be. We're sending some units down, but with Rancid involved we need your support."

"We're already here." Robin hung up on Miller then pulled out his communicator to send a message to Cyborg.

Had a call from Miller. It's a drug deal. Rancid involved.

The reply came moments later.

On it.

Cyborg slipped his communicator back into his pocket and turned back at Rancid. He was still on his phone, frowning now and tapping his fingers against the table. Like Cyborg, he ignored the advances of the ladies, and seemed impervious to the sour looks they were giving him.

A drug deal made sense. The suitcase, the dark table. He needed to get Rancid out of the club, preferably before the buyer turned up.

If the buyer ever did turn up.

Rancid was scowling now, glaring at his phone screen like it had called his mother an alcoholic hamster.

Cyborg stood and made his way to Rancid's table, slamming his hand on the wood to get his attention. "I know what you're here for," he rumbled, keeping an eye out for nosy workers. "Let's take this case outside, huh?"

Rancid glared at him and used his foot to nudge the suitcase under the table, out of sight. "And just how are you gonna get me outside?" he drawled.

With a smirk and a crack of the knuckles, Cyborg dropped the holograph and melted away into his robotic form, eliciting a series of shrieks from the room. "Like this."

A growl of rage ripped from Rancid's throat. "What are you doing here?"

"My job."

Rancid leapt to his feet, fist raised to strike, but Cyborg was quicker. With a fluid sweep of his arm, he readied his sonic cannon and fired it directly at his chest. Rancid was slammed into the back wall.

More screams made Cyborg realise he perhaps could have been a little subtler. When he turned around he found the entire club staring at him, some with recognition, others with horror and fear. Someone had turned down the thumping music, and the crashes and screams had obviously caught the attention of bouncers as two large men were now pushing through the crowds towards them.

Rancid staggered back to the table and snatched the suitcase, just as the bouncers reached them. One made a grab for Cyborg, whilst the other tried to manhandle Rancid to the floor. He wasn't having much luck as Rancid was a slippery character and easily evaded him. Sending the bouncer flying with a sharp kick, Rancid legged it to the back door, disguised as part of the wall.

The other bouncer had a strong grip on Cyborg's upper arms, but he was easily flung off. Cyborg launched himself after Rancid, crashing through the backdoor into the crisp night. Rancid was ahead of him, dashing down the slippery, snow-filled alley way, hugging his suitcase to his chest…

Only to crash into a huge, green gorilla.

"Wha-"

SMACK

Rancid hit the side of the alley with an awful thud and fell dazed into a pile of ice and slush. The gorilla morphed back into Beast Boy who grabbed the case.

"I got it!" he called, waving an arm above his head. "They're over here!"

Robin, Raven and Starfire appeared behind him. "Good work, team," said Robin, taking the case from Beast Boy and cracking it open. "This could put you away for a long time, Rancid."

Rancid muttered something about being set up. Or wanting to sit up. Either way, Raven merely pushed him so he was face-down in the snow and wrapped tendrils of black energy around him to keep him from escaping.

"OI! YOU!"

Cyborg flinched; he'd forgotten about the bouncers chasing them. "Maybe we should-"

"Titans? What's happening?" A group of police officers arrived on the scene, crowding around the mouth of the alley. "Have you caught Rancid already?"

Raven's answer was to kick Rancid towards them.

The bouncers stopped behind Cyborg. "Officers, this man is guilty of assault and battery," said one of them.

The officer in charge rolled her eyes. "These are the Teen Titans. They were on a mission for us. We're not going to arrest them, so you can go back to your little den."

"He punched me!" the other said. "Completely unprovoked!"

"You were probably getting in the way!"

"I was doing my job!"

"So was he!"

Cyborg coughed awkwardly. "Well, I'll just be going now…"

To the bouncers' dismay, the police officers moved to one side and allowed the Titans to leave the alley before diving straight back into the argument. Rancid lay forgotten and moaning between them.

As the others trooped to the car, Robin handed the suitcase to one of the other officers. "Rancid had this."

The officer took the case and peeked inside. "Ugh. Last thing we need is a drug charge to write up…"

Robin gave him a tight-lipped, sympathetic smile and continued on his way.

Once they were all in the car, Cyborg started a lively retelling of what happened in the club, stopping only to check the mirrors when he started up the car and pulled back onto the road.

Robin was only half-listening. Something didn't seem right about Rancid's crime. Of all the places to set up a drug deal, why a crowded club? And hadn't he said something about being set up? Did someone else tell him to use the club as the deal site?

Cyborg had come to the end of his tale, and was now complaining about the Latino music he'd just noticed was blaring from the radio. As he fiddled with the dashboard to switch it to something else, Starfire reached out to place a hand on Robin's shoulder.

"You are okay?" she asked gently.

He nodded. "I was just thinking… the police got an anonymous tip off about the drug deal, but how did anyone know it was going to happen? Unless…"

"Unless there's someone behind all the attacks," Raven said. "That's what the twelve days of Christmas pattern implies. Maybe we should try to find out who and stop them."

"But the next attack could happen any time now," Beast Boy pointed out. "We need to be ready so no one gets hurt."

"What do you think, Robin?" Cyborg asked, but Robin didn't reply. He was staring at the wing mirror through the window, frowning deeply. "Rob?"

Slowly, Robin turned his head to face Cyborg then the rest of his team. "Slade."

Fun fact: I had to look up how old one needed to be to get into a strip club in America. I typed my question into Google and the first thing that came up? 'How to Get into a Strip Club' on WikiHow. (With pictures!)

Some of the articles on that website are so specifically weird; I love it. And I now know more about strip clubs than I ever wanted to know – yaaay.

This chapter's title comes from Rocking Around the Christmas Tree (Brenda Lee, 1958). Except I changed the word 'tree' to 'pole' because I'm a comedic mastermind that way.