Let this be our prayer
Chapter 7
Did you ever stop to think about a dream when you wake up? What did you think of it?
There was absolutely no way in hell that Levi was able to get his parents and sister to go back home. They were somehow convinced that something would happen to the raven if they left.
Quite honestly, Levi wasn't the only one that was fed up.
Farlan had his hands placed on their parents shoulders, "Mom, dad, Lee will be fine. I'll look after him, don't worry."
Kuchel seemed to have none of it, "But, Farlan, I want to take care of your brother."
"Mother, I promise if anything happens, I'll let you know immediately."
Their father seemed to agree with his youngest son, "He's right, Kuchel. Farlan will look after Levi. We have nothing to worry about. He's here with a family member."
Kenny and Mikasa took her to the car, constantly reassuring her that everything would be alright.
Farlan sighed heavily as he closed the door, "I thought mom would stay here for a long time had dad and Mika not convinced her to go home."
Levi hummed in agreement. The raven had been moved to the couch per his request. He couldn't stand being in bed all day.
"Hey, bro, can I ask you something?" The blonde went over and sat down by his older brother.
"Of course."
"Why did you pass out in the office?" Farlan was in school when his mother called him out to let him know that Levi had blacked out in work. The blonde didn't hesitate to leave the school and go see his brother.
The raven knew he couldn't tell his brother. Erwin had suddenly dropped the ball on him by telling him Farlan and Mikasa were also in that hellish world. How the hell could he tell his brother, hey, you know those dreams I've had since I was a kid?
Yeah, well, those aren't just dreams. They're real memories that happened. By the by, you were in that god awful world and were killed by those man eating creatures. Just thought you should know that.
It sounded like complete shit to him, in his own fucking mind.
"You wouldn't understand, Farlan."
"I wouldn't? And why is that?" The blonde would listen and see why he couldn't understand the situation.
"Because the shit I would say would make you think the medicine is getting to my head. You wouldn't believe anything I have to say. So, brother, I'm asking you, please, do not bring it up anymore." His tone slightly begging.
Throughout all the years that he had been with his brother, he never once begged him to leave something alone. Was what Levi hiding that bad? What made it so bad? Unfortunately, until Levi was ready to talk to him, if ever, he would have to keep wondering what it is he can't talk to him about.
"Alright. I'll drop it. Just know that you can talk to me about anything that bothers you."
"Thanks kiddo." Levi reached over and ruffled his brother's hair.
The blonde laughed, "So, big bro, do you need anything before I go to the store?"
"Actually…"
"I'm not going to lie, Levi, I thought you wouldn't invite me over unless it was for work." Erwin had been called over to the raven's house by Farlan. Apparently, his friend wanted to talk with him.
"I wouldn't invite you unless it was completely urgent." The raven was now sitting in the living room with his friend, both nursing a warm cup of tea.
The blonde took a sip of his drink, setting it down on the coffee table, "So, what was it that you wanted to discuss with me?"
"What you said back at the office. What do you mean that Farlan and Mikasa were involved in that world?" The thought had been bothering him this whole time.
"Exactly what I mean, Levi. Mikasa was your subordinate, and she eventually became one of your squad members. After the female titan incident, which you know." The raven nodded confirming that he knew.
"When the entire former special operations squad was killed off by the female titan, Eren was about to be taken into custody because of the failed mission and the unexpected deaths. However, sometime later, we ended up figuring out the female titan was indeed Annie. Armin, myself, you and other squad leaders got together to form this plan to keep Eren out of the military police's hands. We had one of the 104th dress up as him, I cannot remember who unfortunately, but I do know they were able to distract the guards enough for Eren, Mikasa and Armin to encounter with her and engage battle."
The former captain did remember some things like that. He did often see the raven haired girl and blonde boy with Eren before he figured out the brunet's name.
"Eren and Annie engaged in battle and destroyed a large portion of the capital city. I immediately sent you away with another squad leader, and the 104th squad to a hide out because it was dangerous for Eren to be found. I sent you all there do you could train Eren."
Erwin kept saying he sent him with another squad leader. Did he know which squad leader he sent him with? "Do you remember which squad leader went with me?"
"Unfortunately, I do not. Do you know?"
"Very well."
"Who was it?"
"Hanji. Squad leader Hanji Zoe."
"Wait, are you saying Hanji was there as well?" The blonde didn't really expect them to be there.
Levi nodded, "Even they were there. I often assisted Hanji in the experiments they wanted to conduct. I wanted to make sure Eren was completely safe the entire time."
"What kind of experiments were conducted?" The blonde leaned in close to listen closely to the information.
"Hanji experimented to see how long Eren could maintain control in his titan form, if he could understand commands, the hardening ability, complete simple and complicated tasks and so forth."
"Do you happen to remember the results?"
The raven nodded, "Yes. Eren seemed to be able to maintain control for twenty five minutes, and the more we did the experiment, the more control he seemed to gain."
"What of his hardening ability?"
"We gave him boulders and his job was to bring them together with his ability. We did the same with gaps in the mountains so he could assimilate what it was going to be like when he repaired the walls."
"Did he ever get sick because of the experiments?"
"There were some instances in which he did get ill because of an experiment taking too long. I ordered Hanji to refrain from doing anything with him until he was better."
Erwin nodded, then hesitated to ask, "I'm not sure if you remember this, but Mikasa and Eren were siblings back then. Do you have any memory of that?"
"Vaguely. I only remember Eren mentioning he had a sister, but I could never remember her name." Although he had seen her face, and seen the scary resemblance, he chose to ignore it.
"Mikasa often worried about his health. I suppose she blamed you for the reason as to why he was sick."
Levi sighed, "Sometimes. But as her commanding officer, she knew her place. I suspect she knew I meant him no harm when I agreed to the experiments shitty glasses came up with."
"I see."
The blonde was quiet for a moment, "Do you think Mikasa or Farlan have any idea about that other life?"
"I hope not. That world was hell. I don't want them to remember something so god awful."
"You know there's only so much you can protect them against."
Levi sighed, rubbing his temples, "I know, I know. I've tried to see if they have any recollection, and as of so far, they have none."
"And what will you do if they come to know about that other life? Will you tell them you knew all along? Or will you pretend not to know anything?"
Part of him wanted to lie to them, but felt like they would eventually catch on. Levi knew he should be completely honest with his younger siblings and that seemed to be the choice he would make. But he hoped he would never have to speak with them based on that other life.
"I'll tell them the truth should they ever ask about it."
"You know that's easier said than done."
"Well, what do you want me to do, Erwin? Tell them I fucking knew about all that death and sadness bluntly? They're my younger siblings, as their older brother I'm supposed to help them through things they're not sure about. I'm not even fucking sure about a lot of that shit, but what can I do? Complain? No. I have to deal with what is and smile like a fucking idiot while I do so."
"Levi, you can only protect your siblings from so much before they find things out on their own."
"I know."
The blonde stared down at his own lap for a moment, "And what if those memories come through as nightmares like yours did? You know that growing up as a kid you were viewed as different. It'll be worse since they both know how bad it is to be that different. Do you think they can handle the pressure of that?"
Growing up with his parents, friends, and teachers thinking he was different, certainly did take its toll on him. Levi wanted nothing more than to be normal like everyone else. But he also had time to accept that he was different.
His siblings were more grown up, and being accepted was the major thing at their age. No matter how much they deny it, it's the truth.
"I don't know, Erwin. I didn't exactly have someone to talk this through until now, and they might think I won't accept them. You know how much they both look up to me. What can they say? Hey, big brother, I just wanted to let you know I'm having these horrific dreams about man eating creatures and I see you there as well. Just thought you should know that, thanks."
The blonde rolled his eyes at his friend's sarcasm, "I know you'll help them."
"How do you know?"
"Because you're the type to love your siblings regardless."
"You think they'll still think that if they ever tell me?"
"I'm certain they will."
"Now, Erwin if you're wrong, if you're wrong, I'm kicking your ass."
"And I'll gladly bend over for you."
"No homo."
"You would say that."
After Erwin left home for the night, Levi sat in the living room alone.
Farlan had gone to bed some time ago. Even though he wouldn't be going to school tomorrow to look after his older brother, Levi didn't want him to lose sleep.
The raven stared at the family pictures on his wall.
His two siblings looked so happy in that picture. It was back when Levi came back from university, and his brother and sister couldn't have been more content in that photo.
Levi just couldn't imagine his two siblings being plagued by those memories. He could see how Farlan and Mikasa would approach him with it.
The blonde would first seek comfort from his brother. Farlan had done that since he was young. He would usually come to his room and sleep in his bed until morning, and Levi would never say anything. Maybe in the end, Farlan would seek his guidance outright just like he always had. But he also had to remember he was grown up now, and that might have changed.
Mikasa was the one that had more of his worries. She was always one to hide her emotions, much like himself, and tended to bottle up her emotions. Once again like himself.
Wow, Mika. Grade A role model you have here.
His sister was the kind of person who'd rather figure out a situation on their own than go to someone they can trust. In some instances, Levi's had to go to his sister because of an emergency break down she had often when she was younger. Would those be worse now that she was older?
That other life brought nothing but pain that much was simple. But how would they react to knowing what they think are dreams, are actually real?
Levi shook his head. Maybe he was reading too much into the situation again.
Fuck Erwin and his eyebrows for making him worry so much.
Sighing, the raven got comfortable on the couch, closed his eye and fell asleep.
"Hey, you."
Levi turned and saw a blonde standing on the roof. He narrowed his eyes at the other young man, "What?"
The blonde held up a hand, "Whoa, whoa, calm down there, buddy. I just want to help you. Follow me and I can help you lose those military dogs."
Reluctantly, the raven agreed and followed the young man.
Both stayed completely silent as they heard the sound of the 3D maneuver gear pass by them. The smell of gas left in the air.
Levi glanced over at the blonde, "Who are you?"
The other male grinned, "Farlan Church, pleased to make your acquaintance. You're Levi, right?"
"Yes. I suppose I should thank you for saving my ass from the military dogs back there."
Farlan chuckled, waving it off, "No problem. But, I would like it if you could pay me back for helping you out."
Levi narrowed his eyes, "How?"
The blonde grinned, his icy blue eyes glazing over, "Join my leaders gain willingly or we'll force you." He snapped his fingers and other members came out from behind the walls and rubble around them.
Steel grey eyes scanned over his surroundings, "You fucker. You had this all planned out."
"Oppsie daisy, seems like the underground demon caught me red handed." The blonde laughed. "So, you can either willingly join or my guys beat the crap out of you."
Levi sighed, "Why do I always get stuck with the icky jobs?"
Before the blonde's eyes, all of his twenty fellow members were taken out like nothing.
The raven wiped away blood on his knuckles, "Next time, leave me the fuck alone. Tell your piece of shit leader that if he ever comes for me again, I'll kill him." He jumped over the rubble and fled.
Farlan stood in his place, his now former gang members groaning in pain around him.
"I knew it. Levi…you are and I are going to be great friends."
Through so much persistence, Levi reluctantly allowed for Farlan to join his gang.
"Now, listen you piece of shit, I'm not going to trust you right off the bat. You'll have to work your ass of if you ever want to be someone essential."
The others watched in surprise as their leader spoke to Farlan. Levi wasn't known to be cruel to his gang members. Of course he wasn't all touchy feely, but he showed tough love, if you can call it that.
"Of course, boss. I didn't expect any less."
Levi turned and went to business on immediately getting his 3D maneuver gear on.
"Hey, boss, isn't that what those military dogs use?" Farlan had seen the military police use those and thought one had to be in the military to get their hands on those. Just how did Levi acquire one?
"The military does use this gear."
"How did you get it?"
The raven fixed his eyes on him, "Why don't you get to work instead of spatting out questions?"
Farlan slowly nodded, "Sure thing, boss."
Levi averted his gaze from the blonde, "Now, I want you all to be very careful on this mission. This is very dangerous considering I'm the only one with the gear. I want you all to go within the groups I assigned you all in. I want the groups to follow in the exact plan we discussed in the days prior. Should anything go wrong, light the signal fire. Farlan."
"Yeah, boss?"
"Immediately light that fire once you get word of anything gone wrong."
"Course. Don't want to disappoint, boss."
The raven scanned through all the members, mentally nodding when they were all set.
"Alright. Let's get this started."
"Boss! Boss!"
Farlan looked around frantically for their leader, the raven having caught the attention of all the military police, he led them away from everyone so they could complete their important task.
The blonde stood on top of a roof, looking anywhere as to where the raven might be.
A hand reached out and brought him behind some rubble, he was about to fight back when a familiar voice whispered to him, "Quiet. They still might be looking. Stay still for several moments."
Both males stood completely still and quiet, neither risking it to make a move.
Levi finally let go of the blonde, "Why did you come to look for me?"
Farlan was taken back, "What do you mean why? Boss, we all depend on you. We all wanted to make sure you were alright. I told everyone else to head back to base while I went with others to look for you."
"That alone put a lot of you at risk of being caught. Did you ever stop to think that even if they hadn't found me, they might have taken someone else?"
"But we were worried! I told them all to be careful!"
"Careful doesn't cut it if you still get caught." Levi cautiously walked out towards the edge of the roof, scanning the area for anyone around.
Farlan stared at the shorter male for a moment, "Boss, I came here alone. I didn't send anyone to come with me. I knew it was dangerous for more than one person to search for you. Everyone knew that. Boss, everyone was worried you'd been caught or worse, killed."
"If one of those two happened, I would have wanted you all to continue on as if I'd never left."
"So, you wanted us to forget about you then?"
"Essentially, yes."
The blonde stared at him in shock, "Y-You can't be serious."
"I'm as serious as they come, Farlan."
"Do you know how many people there depend on you? How many of them look up to you? Boss, you're the reason they can continue stealing and not feel guilt. You tell them it's for a good cause and they can continue to do so for that good cause. Boss, don't you care?"
It was silent for several moments between the two males. Farlan did truly start to think that his boss didn't care what the others thought until he spoke up.
"Of course I care. I care about every single last one of them. I know which ones need more money for medication, food, getting supplies to fix their homes, and give some more to those who wish to seek their citizenship. I know everything about them, Farlan. I care about them all like friends. As cold as I may seem at times, I do so because I don't want to be too close when they end up accidentally dying during a mission. I enjoy the time I have with those idiots because who knows when the next time you'll see them?"
Farlan could easily understand his concern. When you're living a dangerous lifestyle like they were, you didn't know when the next time you'd see someone. One moment you two could be laughing while having a drink, the next you're standing over their bloody corpse. This was just how their life went.
"And what about goodbyes, boss? What do you think of them?"
"They are sad at the time, as will all partings. But doesn't that make the reunion all the sweeter?"
Perhaps he didn't give his boss enough credit for doing what he did. Many men would break under the pressure, but not his boss. The raven stayed firm in what he did. He stayed beside those who were close to death, dying, or had been going through a death. Levi never once faltered in keeping his promises. Maybe his boss was more human than anyone down here. Maybe he was…
Levi glanced back at him, "If you're done asking me about my thoughts and opinions on life lessons, perhaps we should head back to base to see how the others are."
Farlan nodded, a small smile on his face, "Yeah. Let's go boss."
"I told you not to call me that." The two jumped down from the roof, walking back to base.
"Sure, Levi."
For the next couple of months, Farlan would prove himself to be very loyal and useful to Levi's gang.
The others had taken quite a liking to him, often thinking of him as the right hand man around. What surprised them all was that Levi didn't object to said thing.
Eventually, Levi told all the members that Farlan would be living with him in his home, and if they ever needed the blonde for anything, they could feel free to stop by.
"Levi."
"Hm?" The shorter man was busy cleaning their shelf where all the knives were held.
"I finished cleaning the blankets for our bed just like you said."
Our bed. That was still something Levi wasn't used to hearing. Hell, he hadn't heard that in years. He especially didn't expect to hear it from the over confident blonde he met some months ago.
"Good. You left so many stains on it. Took me forever to try and get them off."
The blonde snickered, "Hey, wasn't just my stains. Yours too."
"Maybe if you learned to keep your dick in your pants, we wouldn't be having this conversation, now would we?"
"Hey, I wasn't the one who woke the other up by a blowjob, now was I?"
"Screw you."
"I'll screw you later."
Levi let out a heavy sigh, "What the hell do I see in you?"
Farlan grinned, "Maybe it's my handsome face, charming personality, or maybe it's the passionate love that burns through your veins."
The raven gave him a deadpan expression, "Nope. Definitely not that."
The blonde chuckled, going over and pressing a kiss to his shorter partner's lips.
Levi woke up from his dream due to a light pressure on his lips.
His steel grey eyes opened and came face to face with his younger brother.
Farlan had a light blush on his face. His eyes had a determined glint in his eyes, "I love you, Levi."
Just what the fuck happened while he was sleeping?
End of chapter 7.
I'm very iffy on this chapter. I might end up editing it later. But if you like it, I think i might keep it the same. Also, happy birthday to Eren. That precious cinnamon roll.