Kryptonian cells, were- to put it lightly- utterly fascinating.

I peered through my microscope, wearing a prototype costume I'd made (technically more durable than my normal one, but unfortunately excessively flammable) while my old one dried off. Prodding a few of the cells I'd managed to convince to grow into a proper tissue, I-

"Oi, Miss Frames," said Professor Ivo, leaning into his computer like it would make the image any clearer. "Can you flip it over a second? That cell on the left might be interesting..."

"Of course, Professor," I said, even as a spike of mild annoyance shot through my brain. I should never get a job in PR. Using a more practical version of the electromagnetic wand from earlier, I carefully flipped it over- Kryptonian cells were more amenable to this sort of thing than the terran variety, I found. "What's up?"

"Shuffle it a bit to the left... No, no, my left- ah, it's not mirrored, is it?" Grandnemesis Ivo was an enthusiastic user of technology, as long as it was either supertechnology or from before my birth date. This livestream method of transferring data and insights, then, was precisely the wrong thing for him. "Yes, yes- there! You see that? Oh, yes, let me have a moment-" He drew a hasty circle around one particular cell with his mouse, despite the fact he could have just clicked on it and had the software do it. "You see that?"

I frowned, looking closer. "The super-organelles?" I questioned. Whatever these funny little power-granting cell components were, they seemed to work pretty much exactly how plants didn't- cell-energy chemicals go in, a vastly superior amount of energy comes out. Because physics is, and has always been, the most ineffective of Superman's Rogues Gallery.

"Yes, but look at that one right there," he said. "It's a really good example, I think. The shape, it's- Oh! Amazo. What brings you over?"

The socially awkward android was looming behind Ivo as if it were perfectly normal- it probably was. Ivo was enthusiastic about social interactions, but not precisely competent at them. Much like myself and electrocuting Parasite with a hastily programmed modification to the Dynacycle's engines, which I totally would have done if I'd had one more second.

Really.

"Your tea is ready," said Amazo. "I also brought biscuits," he added, carrying an amount that implied I was supposed to be eating some.

Ah, Amazo, I thought. You and your inability to identify context. I'd correct you, but you're a big perfect adorable bundle of cold robotics already. Never change.

"Oh, that's perfect, Amazo!" he said, readily accepting the tea. "Just what I needed- it's getting a bit late already, isn't it...? Perfect time for a nice hot drink..."

I chuckled at Amazo once again looking utterly perplexed, remembering that same look on his face when he'd made himself a cup of tea. As Ivo basked in his drink and reminisced about the reasons his coffee-maker now used lasers rather than anything sane, I took another look. The shape, he said...

There was some sort of pattern here, surely. The organelle was pulsating gently, and I could see the fluid and membranes growing and shrinking in volume. But why was that important? What was the fundamental shape, the thing that had caught Ivo's attention...?

Fortunately I could just ask rather than spend the rest of the theoretical episode wondering about it. Those 'why don't you just ask' episodes are the worst, regardless of what it's actually from, and I hate them forever. "Professor?" I questioned. "You said about the shape, but I can't figure it out..."

"Yes! The shape," he reminded himself, his drink sloshing around, prompting Amazo to nervously raise a tea towel in anticipation of a spill. "It's remarkable! It's fascinating, isn't it? Such an elegant solution...!"

"...Err, I don't see what the shape is," I said. "It's sorta just shifting about as far as I can tell."

Ivo huffed, having realised what I'd originally said. "What, did your father never teach you higher-dimensional physics?" At my blank stare, he sighed. "Kids these days... It's a higher-dimensional shape! You're a smart girl- I'm sure you can figure out what it is."

"...yeah," I said, starting to nod as I layered up the three-dimensional shapes I could see. Visualisation was one of my better skills- I'd probably be pretty good at this sort of thing if I bothered with it. "Yeah, I see what you mean. It's..." I frowned. Assuming pressure works as it does in three dimensions... "...Is it... could it be a siphon?" Ivo raised his head a little. "Like- err- a siphon for energy? An energy siphon?"

"There we go!" Ivo laughed. "Got it in one! There we go. I said you could manage it. Yes, it's taking the yellow solar energy- all those photons, neutrinos and whatnot- and with a bit of ATP and a decent electrical differential, it's pulling more energy out!"

"I-" A lightbulb went off in my head. "That... gives me some ideas, actually!" I said brightly, not quite sure why Ivo's words had given me a surge of confidence.

I mean, Batman could do it in his teaching, but Ivo...? What were their methods using that Lex's weren't? I shook my head- Focus, Lena...

A second lightbulbed pinged up next to the first. A decent electrical differential- "And- and that's why he's got so many neurological cells in his cheeks of all places-" I realised- "it's the electrical difference! Nerve cells use it for signalling- he uses that bioelectricity to signal and power his superpowers! Th-that's brilliant!"

I almost threw myself aside to start editing the serum.I need to conserve the shape, I thought. Red sun radiation, that'd block the siphons- but it's in yellow sunlight too, just proportionally weaker... That silver ant DNA- I thought it could just block heat, but a few of those compounds could help purify sunlight of red radiation. And with some electrocytes, I could put those same organelles in muscle tissue, too...!

An email struck me from my thoughts, and I backtracked away from anything crazy, leaving the enzymes to do their photocopying. I checked the sender. "Ah!" I said, quite pleased. "Wasn't expecting to hear from him."

"Who?" questioned Ivo, as Amazo finally figured out that he should put the biscuits back in the cupboard. "Robin? Batman?"

"Reporter, actually," I said. "Clark Kent- great guy, sometimes throws leads on biological stuff in return for a bit more info for his stories, and he annoys Father to no end with his ability to ask basic questions. You two would get along great, I think."

"Ah, Mr Kent!" said Ivo. "He's doing surprisingly well, I've heard. Though I don't read that fancy Daily Planet stuff- good ol' Metropolis Times for me."

"Metropolis times?" I questioned with an exaggerated frown as I opened the email to skim it over. "That stuffy old thing? It doesn't report news, it reports-" Oh. "Ah. That's, err..."

"Mmh?" Ivo asked, as I looked over the contents of the message.

'To Superbrat,

'Hey! I'm sure you were expecting an email from that kent idiot but it's me Parasite! And boy o boy do I have an offer for you! You tell the world that I've got Supermans powers forever and give me enough money to pay for my own private island aircraft and mansion and I'll not tell the world that your secretly Lena Luthor. I'm sure your dear old pa wouldn't like it if he found out would he?

'And don't even think about pulling out any technology because I have a computer that's ready to send off the emails to the press at any time so if you do I'll just use my superspeed to send off enough email's that you won't stand a chance of stopping them in time to keep it a secret!

'I'll be hearing from you in the next twenty four hours. Not Batman or Robin or anyone else. Just you. I don't care how I get my money just that I do.'

End letter. No signing off, because he's an awful guy. Not only is he threatening my secret identity, he's abusing grammar almost as much as English itself does!

That bastard.

"I'll, err, have to be going," I said, hastily going over my biological notes. "I'll see you later, tell Amazo he's the best robot, bye!" Ivo was left just starting to ask questions when I disconnected the stream- I breathed a sigh of relief that I'd managed it before he'd got a word out.

God knows how I can't avoid answering a question, I thought. I'd have been trapped for the whole time I've been given, knowing the two of us.

Right. So. What am I doing...? I couldn't use any exceedingly obvious technology- I'd get away with some clear rubber gloves for protection against energy drain, but not much else. My normal costume was almost dry- better to use that instead of the fire risk I was wearing right now. And the serum...

Well, I thought. Mutating into a kryptonian is pretty much the same as mutating into an extremely handsome human, so that's not exactly an issue.

But if I wanted to actually stand a chance of winning a fight, I had to narrow down exactly what I'd make the serum with.

I knew what I'd go for first. "Brittlestar DNA," I muttered, "definitely brittlestar..."

Because if I was going to go into battle, the first thing I wanted was some decent armour and situational awareness. A brittlestar would be perfect. With their skin covered in tiny armoured plates that could both be used as eyes and colour-changing plates, plus the convenient little ability to naturally expel foreign objects from bulletwounds and so on, there was nothing better to base a superpower on.

Then sea urchin DNA. As a closely related group (well, not closely related at all, but close enough), it would be easy to implement alongside the first echinoderm. By using that as an alteration to the skeleton, I'd be easily able to recover from broken bones- they wouldn't pierce the skin, they wouldn't even fragment.

And a bit of sea cucumber DNA. Mainly just for cancer resistance.

Finally, a bit of avian- with their advanced mitochondria and breathing systems, plus the good ol' syrinx to parrot myself another voice, it would be the perfect finishing touch. I gathered my samples, moved to the machine I was using, and quickly asked myself- Would Batman call this a good idea?

"...Shit," I realised, as my mental Batman made a disapproving frown of disapproval in the manner of Batmans- err, Batmen- everywhere. "Why did I think any of this was a good idea?"

Okay, maybe the eyeball-skin was good. Sensory awareness could help. Apart from the whole 'getting a sense input I had no idea how to use and twenty-four hours to learn it.' But everything else?

Yeah, Lena, I thought. I'm sure Parasite will shoot you and break your bones. It's the thing he wants to do most, with 'avoiding a long engagement of attrition where stamina can come into play' being a close second.

So yeah. Basically nothing there offered any sort of advantage right now. At all.

I reconsidered. The Ophiocoma star and the sea urchin, I could skip out entirely. The avian, too- the respiratory stuff would be good, but that was too likely to cause a mutation, being a physical alteration and all.

The sea cucumber, however? I could work with that.

I shifted my attention to the collagen genes- the stuff that makes connective tissue so tough for how thin it is. See, sea cucumbers have a special ability. They can, entirely at will, make those tissues as stretchy as they like- they can turn from an incredibly tough little animal into something almost liquid.

Please ignore the innuendos surrounding the varying stiffness of a long cylindrical tube of muscle, because that's entirely inappropriate and it doesn't make me giggle immaturely at all. And that's entirely true. Stop looking at me like that, I'm a sensible person who never lies whatsoever.

On top of the ability to effectively alter the density of my tissues- always a top-tier superpower, even if it's bootlegged from an animal so pathetic it can only use its one weapon (strangling fibres) if it shits out its entire digestive system at the same time- I'd need to make the most of kryptonianism. I'd need every little trait I could get to send the power from 'hybrid human' to 'actually Kryptonian', and I'd realise how to do it just in time.

One- get an idealised supply of radiation. If Superman's cells were acting like siphons, they could get a lot of power from a little bit of a solar boost. If I could get solar radiation deep into my tissues, I could make Superman's powers a lot stronger- and the glass sponge does precisely that.
Goodbye, I thought,direct absorption through the skin. Hello, internal fibre-optics and accompanying increase in tissue strength such a silicoskeleton implies.

Then I had to perfect the supply of light so there'd be as little red sun to block it as possible. Most of that stuff was nearing the hotter... Hotter? I thought, realising it didn't make much sense in reference to light. Warmy-er? Warmier. Anyway, red sun could be interrupted by the same sort of adaptations that kept desert animals cool, and I'd gotten a few samples of that sort of thing to go alongside the penguin and plaice DNA on the other side of the spectrum.

In particular, the silver ant is a paragon of not dying when it gets too hot. And unlike the tube worms or vent fish, the ant was actually dealing with sunlight- so with a few of its exoskeletal pigments stolen and added to the gene alterations, I'd effectively be running on rocket fuel rather than petrol compared to Superman. With a bit of tardigrade DNA, it could pull double-duty versus kryptonite- two types of radiation resistance were better than one, and I'd ironed out the last bugs in the last serum (no pun intended).

And finally, I'd need electric eel DNA- which I honestly hadn't been expecting.

I'd grabbed it as something easily accessed from an aquarium, and because everyone loves the idea of zapping lightning from their hands. But now I knew how Superman's powers interacted with his bioelectricity- ran on it, pretty much- I could make my own, bootlegged and much more effective power cells simply by scattering a few strands of those same eel power generators throughout my own muscles.

It was a little more difficult than the other bits- I wouldn't be able to put any in my arm muscles or anything, so no enhanced punching. But abdominal muscles, neck muscles, spinal muscles- I could add a few eel batteries if I spliced here and copied a few genes there, and that would make the Kryptonian protections on my head and body stronger than they might otherwise be. Protection, not zapping- unless I really wanted to headbutt somebody and give them a little extra pain, but that wasn't quite firing arcs of lighting from my hands or anything ridiculous like that.

I went over it again, looking at the alterations I'd be performing. "That looks right," I confirmed to myself. And I couldn't find anything tactically wrong this time- better. I ran the enzymes, centrifuged out a few super-organelles to use, made a second one...

And then I had my serum, in a clean little needle for me to use. Pretty anticlimatic. I pressed it into my arm- I'd always been pretty good with needles. Then I poured out a few dissolved silicon compounds- biologically inert, of course- and injected that, too, for the sake of the glass skeleton.

As I pulled the needle out again and put it on the table, I stopped. I could... feel it, a little. Behind my eyes, and sort of in my temples. And deep in my chest, somewhere, too. Really, I could feel it through most of my musculature- the mildly discomforting sensation of a gurgling stomach, but this time panoramic in scope.

Well, this is an odd sensation, I thought, much in the same way one might enjoy the sweetness of a chilli pepper immediately before the severe burning pain follows.