So much for the courting.

She gave him a schedule. With a time limit to plan it out. He didn't know what would happen if he missed the dead line, but he was sure he didn't want to find out. It wasn't like he was doing it all for her benefit, he wanted it to be nice for both of them. At least a little bit nicer than the backseat of a car, and the car thing was because of awful roommates so the schedule part had a sick and twisted and incredibly normal logical sense. But Amy wouldn't even help him- she maintained she didn't care and it was all his idea and that he bit off more than he could chew.

So she gave him a schedule. A schedule of her classes and all the other stuff she had to do for him to plan around. She gave him a schedule.

What the fuck was he supposed to do with that?!

She wanted him to schedule when he was going to take her virginity. And he had no clue why that didn't even bother him. Literally no idea why. He was still what the fucking over it, but he was what the fucking over it while going along with it and planning it. How did this not turn him off? How was he attracted to this? It wasn't like he was just attracted to Amy and ignoring the weirdness for her sake.

Nope, it was all of this, all of her, even this. He didn't know how, but it didn't really matter, just that he was.

What the fuck.

With the whole scheduling thing he knew it didn't have to be spontaneous all the time, and while technically Amy had apparently been planning the car thing before she even brought it up she didn't tell him while she was planning and there was still a bit of a surprise in the hour drive to the middle of nowhere. But he was scheduling the first time they would have sex like 2 weeks in advance. That was so weird. It wasn't like it was an actual agreement, and they'd both stop if the other wasn't comfortable and just hang out and do non-sexual things and have fun without making the other person feel bad at all. But they both knew that the whole point of it was the sex thing, so they were operating under the assumption that it was going down unless something happened, not that it would be an innocent weekend unless they got carried away (yeah, he was the one making the plans so he chose a weekend). And so far in the scheduling process Amy had no qualms, since she was the freaking schedule giver. And while it was weird as hell for Jake, it wasn't actually uncomfortable. The uncomfortable part was how comfortable he was with it. He knew it was crazy and from experience that normal couples did not do this kind of stuff like this, but he could acknowledge that it was insane, and that Amy was probably insane, and that he was definitely insane for not even being bothered by it.

He was pretty sure that if any girls from his past relationships suddenly dropped something like this he would be at least a little freaked out, but he was pretty sure it would be because no one he had ever dated before would ever do something like this and the suddenness would be the freaky thing. Because no one he had ever dated before were the type of people who would do something close to this, and if they were they'd basically be different people than his actual memories so it was a sucky hypothetical to begin with.

Jake didn't consider himself a judgmental person for the most part, and he could imagine being friends with someone who was into scheduling sex and not caring, but he couldn't imagine dating anyone other than Amy so that hypothetical didn't work either. It was basically just a thought experiment, because he was with Amy now and nothing he would have done mattered, because nothing mattered but her.

Even though this was super weird. But it wasn't at all sudden. Amy was weird and crazy and amazing from the get go. And she was still all of those things. Strange and insane and awesome. Jake wondered if he loved her.

He knew how he felt, but he just wondered if he had been using the word love wrong his whole life or if Amy was something new.

For the most part he grouped love into 3 groups: family, friends, girlfriends. There were probably other groups and subsets, but those were the big 3. And he had a different kind of love with girls he was in relationships with than friends and family and everyone else so it wasn't like he was mislabeling it at the time. And he was sure he wasn't just remembering a less powerful feeling since it had been awhile since their relationship ended. He was definitely happy and loved them at the time, but there was a reason they broke up eventually, even though most of his previous break ups were amicable.

But Amy... she was something else. One of those once in a life time people.

One that never fades. One of those hard and fast and when it all calms down it stays steady and it's still whirlwind love every second that's never leaving.

He loved her so much. It was completely overwhelming, but he wasn't worried about it for a second. He knew he had nothing to be worried about. Maybe overwhelming wasn't the right word. Over flowing. Like he didn't know what to do with everything he felt but that was okay because he didn't need to do anything with it. He could just let it be overflowing. And he loved it. He loved every second of the love. Cause he loved her.

Yup, she was crazy. But he was too, so that didn't matter. Nothing mattered but her. Nothing mattered but Amy.

Amy and Jake- crazy together.

AN: Are you vicariously cringing on behalf of Jake for how cringe worthy this all was?
Tell me if you cringe. Like emotionally cringe tell me that, but if you physically cringe and wince as you read this please please tell me.
Cringy cringe cringe.