Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
342 belongs to Chihori Anigma. 245, 346, 346a & 347 belong to Deep Forest Green. 350, 351, 352, 352a & 353 belongs to Lolerator.254 belongs to Hermione Is My Role Model.
A Massive Thank-you to my Readers and Reviewers.
Dear Students,
I feel like sharing useless information with you so, here it is I only own odd socks for some reason.
339. Not allowed to go on a rant about Twilight destroying the Vampire genre.
Even though it did because now Vampires are all sparkly and stupid.
340. Becoming the first person to graffiti the moon is not accepted as a career choice.
341. Turning the great hall into a giant swimming pool may seem like a good idea at the time, but it really isn't.
Just ask Fred and George.
342. Unless you are Hermione Granger stop trying to talk to Professor Binns.
All you will get is a boring lecture on history.
343. Not allowed to force first years to dress up as leprechauns.
343a. Not allowed to force anybody to dress up as a leprechaun.
344. Harry Potter is to stop writing to Voldemort begging him to say "Harry I am your father" the next time they meet.
It is doing things like this is why people think you are insane, Mister Potter.
345. Hogwarts is not a free country, so stop saying that every time I give you more rules.
Hogwarts is a school, not a country at all.
346. Lupin does not appreciate the nicknames Loopy, Looper, or Loop-dee-doo.
Nor does he appreciate his lycanthropic episodes being referred to as his "period".
I don't care that he no longer works here, he is still to be respected.
346a. Nor are you to refer to Order members as Batshit Moody,Nymphomaniac, or Token Black.
Just stop nicknaming people.
347. ·The rules do not and have never applied to Harry Potter.
Might as well admit it, now.
Except the rules concerning Voldemort they, so apply
348. Professor Flitwick doesn't want to become the prime minster of mash potato land nor is his plotting to destroy mash potato land.
There is no such thing as mash potato land.
349. The portraits do not appreciate anybody drawing on them.
350. You are not allowed to send Umbridge Howlers when she is in the great hall.
People's ears are still ringing, Miss Granger.
351. The Weasley Twins - nor anyone else, for that matter - are allowed to call themselves the second Marauders.
One load of them was quite enough, thank you very much.
352. Gryfifndors are to stop setting snakes on Slytherin students.
352a. Slytherins, you are to stop setting lions on Gryffindor students.
It was all very amusing until Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter were bitten. Mr. Malfoy did indeed inform his father about the situation, and sitting through a whole afternoon of Lucius Malfoy's ranting is not fun, for anyone.
353. You are to stop acting out Romeo and Juliet at dinner.
Those poor first years are still traumatized at seeing the kissing scene.
354. There is no "Dress up as Lord Voldemort Day"
Nor should there be one. Honestly, I nearly had a heart attack when I woke up on Sunday with Lee Jordan looming over me in a very convincing Lord Voldemort costume.
Sincerely Albus Dumbledore.