She missed her mom. It was hard to believe she'd been gone now almost three months. It felt like a lifetime. She had so much she wanted to tell her mother, ask her mother, but she couldn't. Sharon looked up from her chair and smiled at the sight of her dad in the pool with loved her so much. In a way, Sharon knew her dad had thrown a lot of his grief into his attention towards Hannah. She understood and in a way, she was doing the same thing. Her dad was doing okay. He was getting along by himself, alone, but she knew he was lonely. She'd been trying to spend more time with him, partly because she knew he was lonely, but also because she knew life was short. As abruptly as her mom died, she knew her dad could do the same. She wanted to cherish each moment, as she was doing this afternoon.
Sharon waved at her dad and leaned back in her lounge chair. They'd been taking turns with Hannah in the water. It was so hot outside, but both she and her dad were tired. It was a combination of mental and physical exhaustion. She'd been in town a few days now, helping her dad with sorting through her mom's things. He hadn't gone through much of her things yet, and it was time. Sharon had hauled things in from the garage and down from the attic, and the two had reminisced about her mom. They had made a lot of progress, but there was still plenty to sort. They had tried to work around Hannah's schedule, sorting through a few boxes while Hannah napped each day. In the late afternoon, they had spent each day at the pool with her, trying to exhaust her so she would sleep well at night. It had mostly been working. She was growing so much right now; she was almost walking, but she wasn't there yet. She was standing and moving along furniture, and it amazed Sharon how much Hannah had changed in just the last few weeks. She still felt actual walking was at least a month away, but Hannah was getting there.
Sharon knew Andy would be surprised with the progress Hannah was making. He was due to visit at the end of the week, and she was a bit nervous about that. It had been over a month now since she'd seen Andy, their last visit still fresh in her mind. She couldn't deny she wanted the man; she really did. When she'd had time at home to daydream and think about a man in her bed, he continually came to mind. She'd even try to envision men she met fulfilling that role, but each time, her mind would drift to Andy. They really had a chemistry, one she couldn't explain, but she was now counting the days to his visit, mostly for selfish reasons. She wanted him.
Now, Sharon was aware the primary reason for his visit was to see Hannah, and she had to admit he'd surprised her about his intentions, or rather, that his intentions were so honest and true. He loved Hannah; she could see it. There were days Sharon still couldn't believe she had a young daughter, but then, there were days like today, it seemed like Hannah had been in her life forever. She looked over and waved at her dad again. This time, she decided to go and sit on the side of the pool to cool off. She stood, adjusting her wide brimmed hat, and she ran her hand over her simple, but well-cut black one-piece swimsuit. It was modest, but attractive, fitting her needs now as a mother of three. Plus, she spent most of her time at the pool with her dad and didn't see the need for any other style of suit. She walked across the hot concrete and stepped into the pool at the steps. She sat down as her dad walked over to her with Hannah in his arms.
"You two look like you are having a great time," Sharon smiled at her dad and waved at Hannah. He had a good grip on her in his arms. He had Hannah giggling as he would bend down in the water and stand up quickly. For some reason, Hannah thought this was hilarious.
"Water feels great, and you know she's a water baby," her dad said.
"That she is," Sharon smile at her daughter. "Hi, Baby." She made a face at Hannah, who started giggling at her mom. Sharon could now see her three teeth, two on the bottom and one on the top. She had a few others about ready to cut through, but they hadn't yet. Hannah's dark hair was wet and almost matted against her hair. Sharon studied her daughter and frowned at her dad, 'Her swimsuit is getting too small."
Her dad nodded as he looked at Hannah, "I know. I tried to buy her the same one in the next size, but the store was out. I didn't see it online."
Sharon gave a tearful nod, "That was sweet of you. I just can't part with it," she shrugged. "Mom bought her that, and she was so excited about it." They both looked at each other, and Sharon just shook her head, "She had great taste. The little strawberry suit is adorable on her. That is something I will keep forever. Look at me," she let out a tearful chuckle, "upset over an infant swimsuit. Here I am a grown woman, a former police captain, and I'm tearing up about a strawberry suit."
Her dad reached over from where he was standing in the water and patted her knee, "I know. I know. It's not easy. She loved you; she loved us, all of us. She was so delighted with Hannah, and I know this sounds odd to say, but Hannah was almost like this extra little gift to her. We thought we were done having small grandchildren. We'd watched two grow up, and then, she came along," he jostled Hannah who started to giggle. That had Sharon laughing too, and she smiled at her dad. "Sometimes, things happen for a reason. Hannah is clearly here for a reason."
Sharon nodded and dropped her head for a moment. Then, she said, "I'm glad Mom was here to see Hannah. I cherish that, the time Mom had with Hannah, the time we had together. I still can't believe she's gone," Sharon sighed.
"Your mother made me a better man. I find myself wanting to still be better every single day, better in everything, all for her. I know she's watching over all of us," he gave Sharon a small smile. Hannah rubbed her eye, and both adults caught that.
"I think you've worn her out today," Sharon smiled at her dad. "I'm glad she and I came down here for a long weekend."
"I am too. I'm happy you have somewhat of a summer break, and I'm glad you are taking time for yourself, for Hannah. You both deserve that. I know it was a lot different when you were raising Emily and Ricky. I hope I'm here for years to come to help with this little beauty, but as you said, she is getting tired. You ready to go back to the house?"
"I am," Sharon nodded as she stood. She put her arms out to collect Hannah, "I can take her."
"No, no," he waved off Sharon. "I'm going to take her for one more spin around the pool. Guys here are drooling at the sight of this beautiful young lady," he winked. He leaned toward Sharon and whispered, "Well, the really old guys, two dropped dentures around the pool area today, but we'll go with the idea they are drooling."
Sharon burst out laughing and covered her mouth. She looked to her dad, "You really saw dentures?"
"They don't secure them!" Bob said. "I think they are forgetful in their old age," he winked. "You get things ready, and I'll be over with her in a minute."
Sharon nodded and waved to Hannah and her dad. She walked back to their chairs and started to collect their things. It looked like they had packed for a week-long trip, all the towels, floats, diapers, and snacks. She smiled at the sight and gathered their things. Her dad was right; her mom was watching over them. She hoped her mom would be proud of her. It bothered Sharon now that she'd not told her mom about Andy, really that she hadn't introduced Andy to her mom. That, Sharon knew would haunt her forever. She and her dad hadn't discussed more about Andy. Her dad was quiet, observant, but he didn't pry. He never had been that type of father. She hadn't said much more to him either. He was aware she'd taken Hannah with her to Los Angeles. She'd told her dad that Andy was going to help with Hannah while she was in court, but she hadn't discussed where she was staying or anything else about her trip. Her dad hadn't asked either, which she really appreciated. She didn't know what to say. As she gathered her things, she pulled out her phone to check the time. It was 4:50, definitely time to head back to her dad's house. She enjoyed his community swimming pool. It was well shaded even with the intense heat. The pool area had a large shade structure and misters, and that did help with the heat. It was still hot, but tolerable for a very short amount of time. Her mom had been so proud to bring Hannah here for her first swim back in March just before she died, and now, Sharon almost saw it as a tradition to continue, bringing Hannah to the pool. They were just a short walk to her dad's place, and the stroller worked well transporting Hannah and all of the pool items. This would work tonight. They would walk home, get Hannah in the bath, and feed her before fixing dinner for the evening. Her dad enjoyed steak; he could easily fix that and had been grilling a lot since her mom's death. Sharon had at least suggested a nice salad with dinner, along with corn on the cob and fruit, so she, too, was looking forward to their meal. It was now Monday. She'd driven down on Thursday and had plans to leave sometime tomorrow. She didn't have to be home for anything in particular. She'd told Helen she could help at the flower shop over the weekend, but it was a weekend things weren't too busy. The last couple weekends had been slow at the flower shop, giving Sharon some down time at home. She almost missed a text message on her phone, but as she was checking the time again, she saw she had one and paused to look at it.
"Sharon, I am so sorry, so sorry. You have no idea. I feel like a dirt bag, a total failure because I have to cancel for this weekend. I feel like I'm the stereotypical deadbeat dad, walking away from a planned visit. My dad fell again. He needs surgery. He broke his hip. Doc is going to put pins in it and thinks he will be okay. I need to fly there. My sister has been sick all week, and I can't put this on her alone. I hate myself for having to cancel this weekend. I am not the guy who wants to break a promise. I promised to visit. I hope we can discuss another time I can come because this isn't me just flaking out on the weekend. I'm trying to secure a flight to New York. I'm not sure how long I will be there, but I need to make sure he does okay with the surgery. Tried to call you, but no answer. Hope all is well. Andy," she read, rolling her eyes slightly at him signing his name at the end of a text message. She paused to reflect on the message. It struck her that he felt so badly about missing his visit. Here, his dad was in need of surgery, surgery that was more complicated due to his dad's age and frail condition, and he was worried about what she would think of his having to cancel. She understood; of course, she understood. It almost pained her that Andy thought she would be mad at him for that, but as she had her issues, he did too. Feeling like a deadbeat parent was one of his issues. She looked over to the pool and smiled at her dad and Hannah. They couldn't see her, but her dad was talking to a friend of his and showing off Hannah. She had a moment before he got out of the water with her, so she turned, almost if that would hide her, and started to text him back.
"I'm so sorry to hear about your dad. Please don't apologize for this weekend. Things come up. I understand. Go and be with your dad. I understand that, and it's why I didn't answer my phone. I'm at the pool with Dad and Hannah. Call me later if you like with your travel plans," she sent. She paused, re-reading her message and his. The last month, things had been okay with Andy. He continued to show he was very invested in Hannah's life, texting and calling about her all the time. He and Sharon had talked a few times each week, mostly about Hannah. She'd avoided conversations dealing with any relationship between the two adults. In fact, she'd avoided the topic of 'them' so much, that she hadn't even asked him to stay at her apartment for the weekend coming up. She kept thinking about it each time they spoke, but she hadn't gotten up the nerve to ask him, and now, it wasn't a conversation she'd have to have. He wasn't coming for this trip. She'd wanted to invite him to stay at her place, for selfish reasons, yes, but she also knew he would want to see as much of Hannah as he could. Sharon knew the invitation would come with an unspoken arrangement to sleep together all weekend, which was probably why she'd continually had cold feet asking him. He'd told her over and over now he felt differently about her, that he couldn't just show up each visit and hop into bed. She wanted to respect that, but she found herself longing for him in her bed, just as she was now, except now he wasn't coming to visit. She understood, but that didn't change her frustration.
"Someone is tired," she heard and spun around, coming face to face with her dad. She clutched her phone in her hand and smiled at her dad.
"Would that be your or Hannah?" Sharon chuckled as she winked at her dad. "Let's get you both home. I think we could all use a relaxing evening."
"Everything okay?" Bob asked, nodding to Sharon's phone, now clutched on her chest.
Sharon looked down at it and pulled it away from her, dropping her hand to her side, "Oh, yes, fine. I was just checking my messages. I'll dry off Hannah so you can do the same."
The two finished at the pool and walked home. Sharon took Hannah for her bath, while her dad started to marinate the steaks. Her phone rang while she had Hannah in the bath, and she answered it quickly when she saw Andy was calling.
"I'm sorry about your dad," she said as she answered.
"Sharon, hi, thanks," he sighed. She could almost hear the frustration in his voice with just those few words. Hannah was splashing. Sharon had her eyes on her as she sat there by the tub. She looked to the door and saw it open to the hallway. Sharon stood to close it, not wanting her dad to hear her conversation.
"Did you make your travel arrangements?" Sharon asked.
"I am working on it, in addition to wrapping up my work here. I was in the middle of a case. I'd try to finish, but my sister is really not well right now. She'd had some sort of a cough and cold for over a week. I know it's just her immune system down, but the last thing I need is for her to try and sit in a hospital dealing with will be okay, but I need to be there to help. I'm trying to finish here and then going home. I have Buzz researching my flight. He wanted to help, and I think he's found one first thing in the morning. I just wanted to call again to apologize for the weekend. I hope you won't keep me from seeing Hannah. This isn't what I want," he sighed. "I don't have more than a minute, but I had to go on an errand in the building and wanted to touch base with you. Is that Hannah?" Andy asked.
Sharon smiled at her daughter and nodded, "Yes, she's splashing in the tub. Dad and I had her at the pool. I appreciate the call, and sure, yes, we can discuss another visit when things settle."
"I appreciate it. I just don't know when that will be," he let out a long sigh. "Could you put me on speaker for her, for just a minute?"
"Ahh, okay," she said and turned to Hannah as if Hannah understood everything she was saying. "Hannah, Andy is on the phone," she told her.
"Hey, Beautiful. Be good for your mom. I saw a picture of you in the pool the other day. Glad you are having fun with Mom and Grandpa. I love you," he said. "Thanks, Sharon," he told her. Sharon took it off speaker phone.
"It's not a problem,"she told him. "Please don't stress about seeing Hannah. I know you want to see her. We will figure out a time."
"It's just I know you start summer school session soon, and work is tight. I don't know," he told her.
"Focus on your dad. You're feeling overwhelmed. I understand that. Your dad needs you, as you already know. Go, and we can talk soon," she told him. "I know you care."
"I do. I wish I could talk more, but I need to go. I have to finish here at work and get Buzz to book my flight. I'll keep you posted, Sharon. Take care," he said to her.
"Be safe, Andy, and keep me posted," she said.
Sharon hung up and sat down again on the side of the tub, clutching her phone. She smiled at her beautiful baby girl. She groaned when Hannah smiled back at her, that smile the same one she saw on Andy. It shocked her he didn't see it, that Hannah looked so much like him. She saw it all the time, a constant reminder of him. He was not going anywhere. Sharon turned her attention back to Hannah, but as she did her mind started to wander. She suddenly froze, sitting there on the side of the bathtub. She thought a moment, and then, quickly, she let the water out and scooped up Hannah to dry her off quickly. She needed to get to her computer.
20 minutes later, with her plan in motion, Sharon emerged from her bedroom with Hannah in her arms, washed and in her pajamas. Her dad looked up from the stove where he was cutting up fruit for the fruit salad Sharon wanted.
"I have a change of plans," she told him, walking to strap Hannah into her high chair. Her dad raised his eyebrows at her, "I have no set work plans for the next few days, and it dawned on me I should go see Emily before I get busy with work again. She's in the middle of a show, and I want to see her. It makes sense to fly there now while I am already in Phoenix. You can drop me off at the airport. I have nothing to take care of at home right now, and I checked and can fly there tomorrow. I can spend a few days there and return Sunday. It still puts me back home before work gets crazy again."
Her dad continued to listen, watching Sharon as she gestured wildly as she explained. She knew she was doing that and knew her dad was watching her. She met his gaze, and he just nodded.
"It will be great," she smiled at her dad, trying to convince him. "It's like a last minute surprise. I'll book a hotel and will have a few days with my girls. You and I both keep saying life is short. My girls are sisters and barely see each other. It will be good for all of us. Emily will be busy too, but I can just relax too. Anyway, what do you think?"
Her dad pursed his lips as he met her gaze, "Sounds like I need to get to bed early if I'm taking you to the airport in the morning. Whatever inspired this last-minute trip, I hope the trip is what you want, Sharon. I just want you to be happy."