He was vaguely aware of a hand tapping the side of his face. Man, he felt terrible, like he'd barely slept. It reminded him of how he'd felt many times when he'd been drinking, almost like he had a hangover, but he knew he didn't have that. He was just exhausted. The last few weeks of work were catching up with him. As he became more aware, he realized there was someone tapping his face, and he quickly remembered where he was. He couldn't believe how out of it he felt because there was no way he wanted to forget the amazing night he'd had. Sharon. He was with Sharon. Yes, he'd had a crazy couple weeks at work, but he'd driven most of the night to be here with Sharon, and he certainly didn't mind Sharon patting his face. He put his hand up to clasp hers and kiss it, but as he did, he realized it wasn't Sharon.
Andy opened one eye, as he had his other still almost buried in his pillow, and he let out a low hum at the sight, "Morning, Gorgeous," he grumbled and pulled her small, pudgy hand to his. He kissed it and shifted to pull Hannah toward him. She smacked at his face again, and he heard Sharon chuckle.
"She's been determined to wake you," she said.
"Why didn't I notice you getting up or bringing Hannah into the bed? That's disturbing to me," he grumbled. Hannah crawled onto Andy's chest when he shifted to get a view of Sharon. He groaned when Hannah did that, but it allowed him to see Sharon propped up on her arm, her hand at her head as she was on her side studying them. "A very good morning," he grumbled, eyeing her. She'd changed out of her "Mom" look as she'd told him, capri length sleep pants and a shirt and now had on a beautiful deep purple chemise, definitely not kid-appropriate. "What time is it?"
Sharon shifted closer now that Hannah was crawling up Andy. He looked at the baby as Sharon answered, "So full of questions this early in the morning," she said. She put her hand on Hannah's back so she didn't fall as she tried to climb Andy. "I think she's intrigued by you being here. She doesn't seem to remember your last visit."
"Yeah," he groaned as she smacked at his head again. "I was afraid of that. I'm just the random stranger taking up her mom's time."
"Speaking of time, it's just after 7:00. I thought about taking her into the kitchen for breakfast, but something told me you'd want to see her, even with little sleep," Sharon explained.
Andy ran his hand over Hannah's face, her hair even longer now than it had been his last visit. Sharon had said she couldn't bring herself to cut the length in the back, but she was trying to keep it cleaned up around her face. Hannah's hair seemed even darker, and his daughter was going to have beautiful, long, almost black hair.
"7:00," he repeated. "Uggh, I guess I will take the what, not even two hours of sleep?"
Sharon chuckled and moved closer, kissing him quickly on the lips as she snuggled up to his side, "You weren't complaining last night."
"Still not," he said. "I mean, now that I think about it, it is a little troubling a man shows up on your doorstep in the middle of the night, you invite him into your bed, do unmentionable things with him-at least unmentionable in the presence of a small child here, and let him stay."
Sharon burst out laughing and moved over him again to kiss him. Andy had one arm around Hannah so she didn't fall, and he then, tried to pull Sharon in for a kiss, "This is why I drove all night, right here. I mean, last night, too," he flashed a smile at her and added, "you were amazing."
"I'm exhausted," she told him. "I can't imagine how tired you are. At least I got a couple hours of sleep before you got here, but just when I think things with us can't get any better-" she stopped and looked at him.
"They do," he said, a small smile on his face. "I think I fell asleep on you after our shower."
"You did," she nodded. "I'd just turned off the light again to snuggle up with you, and I think you were asleep before I even moved my hand from the light. You seemed out of it. Do you even remember me turning out the light?"
"Sorry," he said, shaking his head. "It's all a blur. I was trying to figure out who was tapping my face this morning, and I'm delighted to see it was this kiddo," he said, pulling Hannah on his chest.
"Maaaaaaaaa,"she said loudly and grinned, her small teeth visible. "Maaaaaaaa," she repeated and looked to Sharon.
"So, we're still stuck on that, huh?" Andy asked, chuckling quietly.
"She is, but daycare is working on more words now, as I'm trying to do so at home," she told him. Just then, the cat jumped up on the bed and started walking over Andy's feet. He caught Hannah's eye.
"Kiki! Kiki!" Hannah squealed at the sight of the cat. Andy raised his eyebrow at Sharon, who was still there, her hand on her head, her hair now falling all around her, and he shook his head at her.
"She's saying 'kitty' better," she shrugged slightly.
He nodded, "Glad to see the cat is still alive here, Sharon. For not wanting a cat, he seems to be pretty content, and Hannah seems to be happy with her pet." The two watched as Hannah tried to crawl toward the cat, Sharon moving quickly to grab Hannah before she went off the side of the bed.
"This probably isn't a good time to tell you, but I'm not sure there is a good time to tell you. My dad and Ricky will be coming over around 9:30 this morning for breakfast," Sharon said and tilted her head more toward Andy. "They don't know you are here yet. I've been rather busy, ahh," she smiled as she thought, "entertaining you since you arrived."
"You're just adding that part to get me thinking about last night," he smiled slightly at her. "Okay, well," he sighed and nodded. "I mean, I was planning to see them at Hannah's party, so it doesn't surprise me, I guess. Okay," he nodded. "Breakfast. I can do breakfast; I can even make breakfast. What's for breakfast?"
Sharon, who now had Hannah in her lap, reached over to clasp Andy's hand. He was still lying there, talking to Sharon, and she said, "Let's see-we didn't have a set menu. Ricky loves breakfast."
"Pancakes?" Andy asked. "How would that be? I'll make them if you want."
Sharon pursed her lips and pointed at him with her free hand, "You drove hours to see us, you barely slept, you have to make that long drive back at some point today, and yet, you are volunteering to make pancakes for my family?"
He looked to her, "Yup," he said with a quick nod. "Here's a secret," he said as he whispered loudly. "Making the pancakes gets me standing, which means I won't fall asleep on you."
Sharon burst out laughing and turned Hannah toward him. She started to crawl toward Andy, and then, Sharon followed, kissing him quickly. She then nodded and said, "Deal. I'll do the bacon and sausage. Ricky likes both, and my dad does too, truth be told."
"Perfect. Well, I guess we should get out of bed, even though I hate the idea and feed the kiddo."
"For once, please let me do something for you. You go take a shower," Sharon gestured to the bathroom. "I'll take care of Hannah right now. I know you want to spend time with her, but take a moment to relax. You deserve it."
"I don't deserve anything," Andy shook his head and glanced to Sharon, who now had Hannah in her arms. "I mean, I missed her birthday. I feel horrible about that, and I'm sure it didn't earn any points with your dad or Ricky."
"Don't worry about that," she said, putting her hand on his as he stood now by the side of the bed. She squeezed it and leaned up to kiss him, "You've been doing everything to surprise me. You've been surprising me for a long time now, Andy. I know where you wanted to be, that work was unavoidable. Enjoy your shower," she said in a low, slow tone as she winked at him and stepped away with Hannah.
Andy groaned and said quickly, "It won't be as good as last night."
He took a rather quick shower because he did want to spend every minute of his trip with them. It was fine Sharon's dad and Ricky were coming for breakfast, even though, he was looking forward to a trip that didn't involve them. It came with the territory, family seeing each other. As he finished his morning routine, he tried to shave quickly without cutting himself. He could hear Sharon in the kitchen area with Hannah, talking to her, and it made him smile. It sounded normal, even though nothing about this was normal. He wanted normal, with them, all the time. Quickly, Andy paused. He looked in the mirror and tried to recall his memory. It was a bit hazy from the night before, but had he? He put down his razor, still shaving cream on his face, and he walked out into the living room area, meeting Sharon's gaze as he looked to the kitchen.
"Did I say something last night before I fell asleep?" Andy asked Sharon, tilting his head slightly. She was getting out all of the ingredients to make pancakes, and it was all he could do to not go over there and take off her robe because he knew what lingerie she had on under it. He saw that the counters were covered with the food and tried to refocus on Sharon. Honestly, this probably wasn't the best time for this conversation, but it had hit him as he'd been shaving.
She glanced up from the counter toward Hannah who was babbling in her high chair. Andy followed her gaze, and then, he looked back at Sharon. She briefly glanced at him and then back to where she was working. He nodded to himself, but Sharon just gave a small shrug, "We were going to sleep, Andy. You had a long day."
"I told you I love you, didn't I?" Andy continued to look at her. She paused and took a deep breath.
"You were mumbling as I turned off the light. It's fine, nothing, really," she shrugged.
"It's not just nothing!" Andy said loudly, and that had Hannah glance toward him too. He knew he looked ridiculous with all of his shaving cream as he stood there. Sharon finally stopped and met his stare.
"Andy," she sighed and shook her head. He took a few steps closer to her so at least he was on the other side of the kitchen counter.
"Look, it's not the way I wanted to say it. I just realized it as I was shaving. I know I was tired, almost out of it, and I should have told you in a different setting even though we'd just had an amazing time together both in the bedroom and with our shower, but it's true, Sharon. I love you," he smiled sweetly at her.
"I'm not sure what to say," she paused and pursed her lips. "I don't want to hurt you, but I'm not there, at least not yet. That's partly why I didn't want to get into this," she frowned. "I am not sure of anything, any of my feelings. It wasn't that long ago I even acknowledged I cared about you, Andy. It's too soon, at least for me. I realize you've maybe been dealing with this longer than I have, at least addressing your feelings, but I just," she shook her head.
He sighed and ran his hand over the back of his head, "Yeah, okay. Look, I didn't mean for it to come out like that, when I was almost asleep next to you. I wasn't planning to tell you like that."
She was looking at him, her hands on the counter and just nodded, "Okay, I mean, I realize that. It's, it's, fine," she said, waving her hand.
Andy sighed too and dropped his head, "It's not just fine."
"I didn't mean it like that," she paused. "Look, I don't know what I feel. I don't. I thought I loved Jack, and you can see what happened with that. With us, it started as just physical, something we both needed. I never saw it being more than that, and while we are a couple years down the road now, I know you will think I'm crazy to say it's taking me by surprise, but it is."
"Fair enough, so maybe we can talk more later? I'm not pressuring you, Sharon, but it is out on the table, and yeah," he smiled softly at her and nodded, "I love you."
She gave him an almost nervous smile and nodded, "Thank you. We can talk later."
"Maaaaaaaaa," Hannah called, pulling the two from their conversation and their intense gaze.
"I'll ahhh, finish shaving," he nodded and retreated to the bedroom, wanting to kick himself for how he'd handled that. It had hit him while he'd been staring in the mirror; he'd mumbled that to Sharon as they were finally going to sleep the night before.
She'd turned off the light, and he had tugged on her arm, pulling her toward him. They'd had a very passionate, but sweetly romantic time together after he'd arrived. First, they had checked on Hannah, and they had just stood there looking at her sleeping sweetly. Andy had finally wrapped his arms around Sharon, as he stood behind her. He'd started to kiss her neck, his feelings as he watched Hannah and stood with Sharon, almost overwhelming. Sharon had turned in his arms, quickly returning his kisses. He'd started to tug her toward her bedroom where they'd finally ended up with the door closed. Time in bed had led them to a late night shower, and finally after all that, they were back in bed, pleasantly exhausted in each other's arms. He'd kissed her head and said, "I love you," in his low mumbling tone. He didn't remember anything after that, which he knew meant he'd fallen asleep. It had just felt so right, so normal, and in his exhaustion, he'd almost forgotten he'd said that. She'd even asked him earlier if he remembered her turning off the light. She'd heard it, and she wanted to talk about it, or she had. He wanted to kick himself. Right now, though, he needed to finish getting ready. Sharon's family was coming for breakfast, and he needed to do his best with them. He knew he wasn't their favorite person, and he wanted to prove to them he was the right man for Sharon.
Ricky and Bob arrived just after 9:30, and Andy glanced at Sharon when they both heard the door open. Both were dressed for the day, and they'd had time to play with Hannah. The two looked to the door as it opened. Even with walking in on them the last trip, Sharon had told Ricky he never had to knock at his home, even if right now, it was a temporary apartment. Sharon had unlocked the door earlier, and Ricky called out as he entered, unaware Andy was there.
"Morning Mom," he yelled. The guys weren't paying attention to Andy, as they didn't know he was there, and Sharon walked to greet them.
"I hope you don't mind we have another for breakfast this morning," she said, her arms crossed as she walked across the room. "Good morning to both of you."
Bob looked up at that, his eyes widening as he made eye contact with Andy, who was rinsing his hands. Andy gave him a nod and quick wave as he moved across the room. Hannah was now on her little blanket playing on the floor. Andy bent down and ran his hand over her head as he walked by her, his hand then extended to Bob.
"Bob, nice to see you again," he nodded. "Ricky, you too," he gave a head nod at Ricky whose eyes had widened.
"Andy, didn't expect to see you this weekend. Sharon said you had to cancel," Bob said while he shook his hand.
"I had to work. I never wanted to cancel," he clarified.
"Dad, I told you he was working," Sharon gave a slight frown.
"Believe me," Andy nodded, "I wanted to be here. I've been dealing with dead bodies the last couple weeks," he chuckled, a definite nervous laugh. "Missing Hannah's birthday, that about killed me," he said with a small smile. "I always wanted to be here."
Sharon put her hand on Andy's back, "Dad, Andy drove here all night to be here just for today. He has to drive back to L.A. tonight for work tomorrow. I really appreciate his effort. This weekend meant a lot to him."
Bob eyed Andy and just nodded, "Well, I like to see effort and rarely see it made for my grandkids. Andy, I realize work is unavoidable at times, and well, at least you are working and not taking money from my daughter," he sighed. "If you drove all night, I suspect you are hungry."
"Starving," Andy smiled at him. "I'm making pancakes."
"I'm in," Rick y smiled. "Pancakes are my favorite."
"So I heard," Andy smiled. "I'm cooking."
"You drove and now you are cooking?" Bob asked. "You're giving Sharon a break," he nodded, eyeing his daughter. "Those are good gestures, but it still would have been good to see you here for your daughter on her birthday."
"Dad," Sharon interrupted, "why don't you and I take Hannah on a small walk before her nap? She's about ready for it; she has been up earlier than normal several days this week, and well," Sharon shrugged, "her naps have been all over the place lately."
Bob eyed Andy again and then nodded at Sharon, "Okay."
"Ahh, Ricky, want to help me finish?" Andy asked.
Ricky looked up from where he'd stopped to kneel down by his sister. He glanced at Andy and then to his mom, "Umm, sure," he nodded.
"Dad, if you get the stroller, I'll grab Hannah," she told him and gave a small nod and smile to Andy. It was clear she wanted to speak to her dad.
"Here you go, Mom," Ricky said, standing with Hannah in his arms. "So, Andy, what do you need?" Andy waved at Sharon as she and her dad stepped outside with Hannah. Andy gestured to the fruit on the counter.
"Your mom was about to slice that if you don't mind," he said. "Plus, this gives us a few moments to chat."
Ricky nodded and got to work on the fruit. Andy continued to eye him as he watched the next batch of pancakes.
"So, Ricky," Andy said.
At the exact same moment, Ricky said, "So, Andy-"
Both glanced and gave each other a small nod, and Andy gestured to him, "Go ahead, please. You were going to say something, right?"
Ricky nodded and continued to slice the fruit, "So, yeah, I mean, it's the second time I've been home, or here to where my mom is living, in the last month, and it's also the second time I've been surprised to find you here. I mean, at least this time when I came in the house, you and Mom were fully clothed," he chuckled.
"Watch it," Andy raised an eyebrow and pointed his spatula at Ricky. "You've got mostly free reign to speak, but let's be respectful; it is your mother."
"Fair enough, and actually," he gave a small smile and continued, "I respect that you stood up for her."
Andy nodded, and Ricky cleared his throat to say more, "Back to my original statement, the last two times I've come home, you've been here. I mean, this time, you showed up in the middle of my visit, but I believe the intent was to be here for Hannah's birthday. My question, is I guess, is will this be the new normal? Am I going to continue to find you here, in my mom's home, in her bed, even? I know I'm an adult, but it's something I question, mainly because I know how badly she's been hurt. I can't tell you how many times in my life I would wake up, even as a small kid, and find my dad back home. Sometimes, he'd be a 'surprise' on the couch," Ricky said, using quotations to emphasize, "and sometimes, he'd come out of their bedroom. Now, as I got older, that shocked me, the times he'd come out of their room. I mean, yeah, sure, teenager, but I'm not stupid. It's a little alarming to see it now, not that I want to completely judge you, but here, I have a little sister. At least, as far as I can see, the behavior is repeating-now even for her."
Andy nodded, "Fair enough. I'm not going to stand here and treat you like a little kid. You obviously know how your mom and I got together, and sure," he shrugged and continued, "I'm not proud of that, at least you kids knowing it. It's not easy to say we were just some what, hook up, as you would say, but it's gone well beyond that. Still, it was one of those things we never expected to get back to you kids, but Hannah and all," Andy sighed and shook his head. "It is what it is now. Your mom and little sister mean the world to me. I never would have imagined I'd have another child, but I'd do anything for her. I can understand the concern with seeing me here, wondering if you think I'm going to hurt your mom and sister, because really, that's what you are asking, isn't it?"
"Yeah, I guess," Ricky shrugged. "Bottom line, sure, are you going to hurt them?"
"I'm doing everything in my power NOT to hurt them. I want to be there for them, to lessen any burden for them, but I guess I didn't know that your dad would just randomly show up that often. I can see it would be concerning," he said.
"Right, concerning for many reasons, one being that I'm worried Mom just seems to attract that," he sighed.
"Your mom is a grown woman," Andy nodded. "Don't forget that. Sure, people don't always make the right choices, but she's trying."
"If I may ask, if you even know, what is this that you are trying? I mean, I never hear a word about you, and suddenly, you're here twice this last month. You live in Los Angeles. She lives here. Again, it's hard not to compare. I know it's not the same, but my dad lives in Vegas. Granted," he shook his head, "he took off when still married to Mom, but he'd just pop in and out of our lives when convenient. I can't help but see the same."
"I do live in Los Angeles, and your mother did too. It's hard with her here, but I'm committed to seeing her, seeing Hannah. It was Hannah's birthday. That was my primary reason for being here this weekend. I get the benefit of seeing them both, but Hannah was the priority this weekend. I've messed up so much in my own life, I couldn't stand the idea of messing up, starting with her birthday."
"Yeah, well, I can't remember the last time my dad came home for my birthday; in fact, I'm not sure he still remembers when my birthday is. He'd be more likely to come home and ask me for my birthday money. I certainly hope money isn't some problem here too. Mom already had one guy take her for what he could."
Andy held up his hand to almost plead his defense, "Listen, I can assure you that I'm here to help. Ask your mom even, but I've been trying to give your mom money, not take any at all. I know it's expensive to raise a child, and I want to provide for Hannah, not that your mom can't, but I want to be part of that. I contribute to her college fund, and I have given Sharon a good amount of money for Hannah, even though she claimed not to want it."
Ricky nodded and a small smile broke on his face as he chuckled, "Let me guess-she is capable of doing it herself."
"Exactly," Andy gestured to him. "You know your mom. Look, I know you are worried, and you have some valid concerns, but I'm trying to do the right thing."
"It's just that I don't know you, not at all and just saying you are my sister's dad, well, it's not enough. My own dad is a deadbeat, so no offense, but I'm not into dads all that much, at least ones who claim to be all interested but live somewhere else."
"Maybe we can just try with each other, hmm?" Andy asked. "I get it. I really didn't realize there were the similarities with your dad, but yeah, and adding to that, is the alcohol."
"Mom said you don't drink anymore, but I know an alcoholic is an alcoholic. My dad says he's sober, as you smell the booze on him," he rolled his eyes.
"I can't promise I will never drink. That's my goal, but I can tell you I haven't had a drink today, haven't had one in years. I'm seeing your concerns and realize you have reason for them," Andy said.
"Mom said you have two other kids. How are things with them? Did drinking ruin relationships there Ike it did with my dad?" Ricky asked.
Andy raised an eyebrow; Ricky was blunt, but he appreciated that, even if he asked tough questions. Andy just nodded, "Yeah, drinking, it ruined everything for me, almost my entire life. Drinking nearly ruined me, NEARLY," he enunciated. "My kids aren't interested in much contact with me, but I'm trying. I'll keep trying. I know their birthdays, and just like this with Hannah, I want to be there for them, all of them."
Ricky just nodded. The room was quiet, and finally, he spoke, "Look, Andy," Ricky turned and leaned against the counter, crossing his arms, "I don't necessarily think you are a bad guy. It's just these concerns. I'm happy my mom is getting out there and dating. I was the one who wanted you two to go out my last visit because I realized any man she had here well,"he gestured his hands and continued, "any man she had let into her life like that had to be one she was trying to trust."
"She is," Andy nodded. "We are learning to trust each other. It's easier for me, but even that wasn't perfect. I almost have to learn to trust myself, your mom too."
"I want my mom to be happy, and I want my little sister to have a better father than I have had. That's really what I want. I want there to be happiness in this house, not disappointment and sadness," he explained.
"I want that too, Ricky. I really do, and I want us to get to know each other better. I think that will come with time because I plan to be here. I don't want to run you out of your own home-"
"No, that's not what I meant about you being here," Ricky frowned.
"I know," Andy nodded. "I can't promise what the future will hold here, but I love your sister and your mom."
Ricky tried to hold back a smile, but he raised his eyebrows, "Does she, Mom, know that?"
Andy almost mimicked the same expression, trying to hold back a smile, but he finally did smile, "Yeah, she knows, and it's okay, but there's a long road to anything more. I now can see a lot of that is due to the similarities with your dad."
The two head the door open, and Ricky quickly got back to work. Andy smiled at Sharon as she walked inside, and Bob followed, carrying Hannah, who was almost asleep. Bob and Sharon quietly walked Hannah back to her room, and after they were out of sight, Ricky leaned over and whispered to Andy, "One more thing-even with everything, Mom has always had a soft spot for Dad, saying Dad gave her the two greatest gifts she could ever imagine. I see that when she looks at you too, that you gave her this amazing gift with Hannah. I know I'm young, but I have also watched my mom for years. Just don't hurt her; don't take advantage of that soft spot."
Andy glanced at Ricky, this young man Sharon had raised. She was right; he was extremely intelligent and had great insight. He'd been hurt by his dad. Sharon had been hurt by her husband. Ricky had pointed out many areas in which Andy was similar to Jack. He knew some of it, but it also came as a bit of a shock. Sharon did seem to have a type, and he fit that, even when she hadn't been trying to find a man for her life. It was something he needed to address with her. He glanced at Ricky again who was focused on the fruit. He was a good kid, a good kid concerned for his mom and now his little sister. Andy had a lot of work ahead to show Sharon's family he had good intentions. There were days he needed to convince himself of that, but he knew that he loved his daughter and loved Sharon. He'd finally admitted it, and now, he just needed to continue to prove it.