Lottie stifled a yawn and felt her eyes drooping as she stood outside of the carnivalesque tent. God damn it Amber what's taking you? Lottie covered her mouth as another yawn escaped and looked blearily around at the situation she was now in. Soon after their arrival at the event the Largo children had separated. Luigi had stormed into the crowds, Pavi had declared he needed a face change and had sauntered off with a gaggle of Genterns, which left Amber to roughly grab Lottie by the arm and drag her over to a tent. Amber had turned to her at the threshold of the structure and told her that she had to stand guard while Amber finished some business. The Largo heiress left with an open threat to Lottie should she move from her post … and hence the current scenario. Well this job didn't sound very difficult at all. In fact, Lottie almost wanted to thank Amber for the task. Sanitorium square was packed and she didn't exactly have the energy nor the desire to intermingle with the other attendees. And so she stood … and stood … and fucking stood. Lottie's gratefulness soon turned to irritation as the minutes turned into hours. Her feet were throbbing in the high heels, her body screaming at the abuse and lack of care, and her vision dizzyingly slipped in and out of focus. Man how nice would it be to lay down on that soft bed back at the Largo mansion, just cocoon myself in the soft blankets … Lottie lightly slapped her cheeks, willing herself to stay awake. I can't pass out or I'll be fucked, Lottie thought as she gave herself another smack.
"Dear are you alright?" An angelic voice asked from beside her.
"Huh, what?" Lottie returned startled, turning her head in the direction of the voice. She felt her heart momentarily stop as she locked eyes with the Blind Mag. "Holy shit you're Blind Mag." Good one Lottie, very articulate.
Blind Mag winced at the vulgar language but softly tittered at the woman's reaction. "Well yes I guess I am. But still, are you alright dear? You look rather exhausted."
Lottie be cool, you're having a conversation with one of your idols and she's not a complete asshole. In fact, she's asking to see if you're doing okay which is the most human kindness you've encountered in a while.
"Oh gosh, I'm sorry for being weird. You must get this all the time, I'll try to treat you like a human rather than a celebrity okay. My name is Lottie and I'm doing as well as can be expected, thanks for asking. How are you? Do you even want to have a conversation with me? Because don't feel obligated, seriously. Not to say that I don't want to talk to you or that you weren't insanely sweet to ask how I was doing, but … and now I'm rambling." Lottie wanted to strangle herself for how fucking stupid she sounded. She couldn't even blame it on her exhaustion … it was just another fantastic Lottie trait.
Blind Mag let out a genuine laugh and almost wanted to cry as the sound echoed in her ears. How long had it been since she had presented any authentic emotions? Not since … ah that was too painful to think about. Better to focus on the funny woman before her. "Maybe you ought to slow down. I wouldn't have addressed you if I didn't want to have a conversation with you. And I'm also doing as well as can be expected. Are you waiting for someone?"
"I hope you're not feeling anything like I am. And yeah, I'm waiting for Amber Sweet," Lottie pointed to the tent behind her as she made her statement, "being the Largo bitch is … well … a bitch." Oh shit Lottie she fucking works for the Largos too you dumbass! You have no idea what's she's going to say to them! Fuck! Lottie nervously locked eyes with the Largo Prima Donna and felt herself give an involuntary sigh of relief at the expression she was met with. Mag's lips were tightly pulled into a small frown and her mesmerizing eyes were focused on a faraway point, almost as if she was looking into the past rather than into the distance.
"Yes, yes it is." Mag quietly agreed, shaking her head to pull herself out of deep thoughts.
"Sorry, if you can't tell I don't know when to shut up and say really stupid things without a single thought." Lottie reached out to pat the woman's shoulder, but stopped mid extension realizing how inappropriate that would be. She lamely lowered her arm and started rubbing her other one, unknowingly disturbing the foundation to reveal a small part of her bruising. Lottie felt a hand draw her own away from its actions and sucked in a quick breath as she looked into Mag's face of concern.
"You poor thing. I can't promise you it gets better. Even if you leave their immediate circle you will never be free. But I haven't been – not like that – ever since the singing took off." Mag rubbed the girl's hand and tried (but failed) to not see herself in the small, fragile figure. She too had been young, too young when the Largo family had claimed her body, her voice, her sense of self. She knew things would be different if Ma – if she had still been with her. But she was gone, and Mag was undone. She could finally see but was blinded to any real future … just music and sex and music and pain and music and darkness and music and nothing. She was and would be Rotti's automaton until her end …
Mag was unaware as words tumbled out of her parted lips. "But even now … It won't be long until my debt will be permanently settled." Mag concluded cryptically, dropping Lottie's hand.
Lottie grimaced as she saw a glimpse into the completely un-glamourous life of the "super star" Blind Mag. She was supposed to be the beacon of wealth, of fame, of someone free from the worries of others indebted to the Largos. She was supposed to be the Largo's equal, their partner … and she's just like me. A lapdog who can live as a Queen until the red carpet is ripped from under her broken feet and she falls and falls and falls. Lottie briefly wondered what people would think if they knew even Blind Mag was not free from the corruption of this world. Would they care? Would they think they could rise above? Lottie – appropriateness be damned – rushed forward and embraced the older woman, as if her arms could keep the two of them from breaking apart … save them from the overpowering will of the Largos. Mag was startled by the caring gesture but relaxed into the young woman's embrace smiling as she brought her own arms up to wrap around Lottie. The smile quickly turned sad upon the Diva's face … I wonder if Shi – if she would have been like this, if we would have been like this.
And the moment was broken by chaos.
Pavi suddenly emerged from a tent in the distance admiring his new face and walking towards Lottie to show off. Simultaneously, Luigi stormed up demanding a cup of coffee, stabbing the man who mistakenly abided his request. Lottie was knocked over by Amber's sudden appearance (that's fine, it's not like I'm in excruciating pain or anything) and watched as she began to shout at Mag. The Largo's voices blended in a cacophonic pitch and Lottie struggled to stand up to do … well fuck if I know, but something about the situation.
"CHILDREN STOP!" A demanding voice sounded, blissfully ending the argument and momentarily causing total silence until the dull din of passerby's returned. The Largo children stood looking away from their father and Lottie was unsure if she should continue trying to stand or just stay still until the scene unfolded. Well better be still and invisible than potentially interrupt whatever's going on, Lottie resignedly thought relaxing on the hard concrete.
"Ah Mag, just the woman I wanted to talk to. I believe I have someone you may want to meet." Rotti Largo smirked, as he moved to reveal a young, intensely pale girl with long black hair. Lottie looked at Mag and saw concealed shock. Lottie looked back at the young face with renewed interest. Who was this girl? What am I missing? Why am I so god damn nosy?
"This is Shilo, she too wants to be a singer and I believe I could help her as I helped you Mag." Rotti continued, an evil grin on his face.
Mag's mouth twitched but she said nothing in return, instead turning to look at the girl, Shilo. It was as if Mag was attempting to absorb every detail of the figure before her, her eyes darting quickly between features. Lottie wondered if she were the only one who noticed the shock, deep sadness, and fear in the woman's facial expressions. Lottie wondered if she were the only one who cared enough to notice. Yet, her thoughts were cut short as the group began to move towards the mainstage of the ceremony. Lottie began to push herself up when she was (for the how many-eth time?) roughly pulled to her feet by Amber's body guards and escorted in the opposite direction.
"Um, aren't we supposed to be going the other way? Pretty sure the ceremony is over there? No, fuck me I guess." She was led down a back alley by the silent burly men as if she was no more than a package being delivered. The men made a series of turns and suddenly came face to face with Amber.
"Come on we're going to skip out on this Mag-a-palooza and have some real fun. If Daddy wants his precious singer more than his own daughter he can have fun trying to explain my absence." Amber spat, turning down another alley way, forcing Lottie to jog after her.
They walked in tense silence for what seemed like hours … or maybe years … Lottie's brain slowly churned out as she began to panic – or she would have if she had the energy to. She knew she should be worried about Rotti's retribution especially in aiding Amber's defiance. Yet, her body was taking precedence and it was not happy with her one bit. The hours of physical use instead of much needed bed rest were finally catching up to her … oh hell they had already caught up with her and overpassed her while giving her two middle fingers. She was incapable of picking up her feet to walk, no matter how much she willed her body to listen to her. Instead, her feet slowly dragged on the ground like mannequin appendages. Her knees buckled with almost every step, her head spun, and small stars burst behind her half-lidded eyes, causing her to fall several times much to Amber's chagrin. To top it off, her arms hung limply at her sides, causing her to look and feel like the barely walking dead. They turned down another alleyway – how were there so many fucking alleyways in this City? – and came upon a strange scene. Lottie slowly blinked as her brain attempted to process the image. GraveRobber was with the little girl … Shia? Shyyyyy la? Something … from before amidst a crowd of junkies. Some junkies were prostrated at the feet of the enigmatic man, while others clung to his leg with intense looks of longing as they panted. GraveRobber, with a theatrical hand twirl that almost made Lottie lose her shit, seemed to be educating the watchers on the use of Zydrate. Lottie's attention was quickly drawn away by the sound of tearing fabric beside her. Amber ripped off her dress, revealing a dominatrix styled lingerie set underneath, and sauntered over the undulating bodies towards GraveRobber. She easily caught his and the girl's attention and suddenly everything went silent. It's wasn't that everyone stopped talking, rather Lottie's ears seemed to refuse to take anything in. She watched in a daze as Amber seemed to yell at the child and then turn to press her body against GraveRobber. I don't even know what's happening anymore … The scene tilted as Lottie's body crumpled and her last thought was one of wonderment … how could Amber be standing when she was laying down?
… … … … … … … … … … … …
She felt something wet tickle her cheek and then another and another and with a gasp her eyes fluttered open as she found herself caught in a downpour. She heard sirens in the distance and saw a few junkies dash past her. Oh shit a raid. She needed to get the fuck out of here. Where was Amber? She wasn't particularly concerned about the woman but being with her would make her safe. With a tremendous effort Lottie turned her head towards the spot she had last seen the woman's prone body and saw … nothing. Amber had apparently left without her. BITCH. Guess I'm on my own as per usual. Lottie attempted to stand up but was horrified to find her limbs could not support her. Oh fuck, oh fuck, oh FUCK. Lottie this isn't the time to fuck around, you need to get up and get out of here! Yet, her willpower was no match for a total body shut down. Her eyes frantically took in her surroundings, searching for something to help her when suddenly she froze … she heard flurried footsteps fast approaching her and internally screamed. Maybe if I act dead they'll leave me alone?! Lottie instantly went limp and closed her eyes, holding her breath and praying to any being that she wouldn't be arrested and killed. She heard a high-pitched gasp and felt strong, familiar hands cup her face and turn it upwards. This doesn't feel like an arrest … Lottie couldn't help it, she peeked open her eyes and saw GraveRobber looking almost angrily at her.
"Get up you little idiot we have to go." He growled, dropping her head.
"What a fucking good idea why didn't I think of that!? OH WAIT I FUCKING DID. I can't move jackass." Lottie returned, looking down herself to draw GraveRobber's attention to her body. The rain had removed the foundation so meticulously applied and revealed the mottled bruises that entwined her entire frame.
Now dear reader's I will spare you the distasteful string of curses that flowed forth from the handsome lips of our antihero as he looked at the crippled form before him
"Well shit G.R. thanks for caring and all but that poor girl will never be able to unhear that." Lottie chuckled and swore she felt her rib re-break. Her head swam with the intense pain and she involuntarily gasped. "Oh shit I think I'm actually dying, " She slurred and again the world went black.
When she reopened her eyes she was gently rocking back and forth. The fuck? She felt strong arms around her and realized that the rocking was the motion of the body that held her. GraveRobber had evidently picked her up when she lost consciousness and was now carrying her away from danger. Her mind was blank. People did not help other people in this City. GraveRobber did not help other people unless he could see something in it for himself. And yet here he was helping her and this little girl. She watched stunned as he mounted a passing garbage truck and helped the little girl on. The three of them sat in silence, unable to look at one another. Whether it was awkwardness or sheer awe at what had just occurred Lottie would never be able to tell. She did know, however, that she was still being cradled against GraveRobber and felt her shit brain begin to wind itself up. She had to say something, anything really.
"Soooo I'm sure you don't remember me but we met earlier at the opening with Mag and Rotti, I mean I was on the ground, so maybe you didn't see me because you know below eye level. But actually maybe that did make you remember me because you've only ever seen me laying down, point and case right now ha ha oh god can someone please stop me?" Lottie pleaded, looking between the two. The young girl laughed and a small smile appeared on Lottie's face.
"Sorry I don't know if I saw you earlier, I was kind of distracted. But my name's Shilo and Rotti invited me to meet Mag."
"Shilo! That was it. Well hi Shilo, my names Lottie and I work for the Largos. I met G.R. the other day and we somehow ended up becoming friends? I consider him a friend at least. How did you come to know Rotti Largo that's some pretty serious stuff girl. You know what, never mind, I'm too nosy to even be alive please just roll me off and let me get run over." Will I ever not be a total moron Lottie wondered as GraveRobber and Shilo laughed at her word vomit.
"Nice to meet you Lottie. Um I guess I kind of met G.R.," Shilo tentatively said, "the other day as well. But wait, is Rotti really some big trouble? He seemed kind to me … but then … well with Mag and all …." The young girl trailed of.
Oh shit Lottie now you've gone and scared the kid. "I mean maybe he really does like you so … you should be okay?" Lottie knew she didn't sound convincing but she highly doubted Rotti Largo cared for anything other than himself. A quick side eye to GraveRobber revealed that he was thinking along the same lines.
"Well he said … I mean, I think he knew my mom? He said he wants to … well I'm actually not really sure what he wants from me." Shilo stuttered out. She suddenly felt like a rather stupid little girl around two very experienced people.
"Hey it's okay sweetie," Lottie wanted to kick herself at the use of sweetie but the girl was reminding her too much of the kids she had helped at the after-school program, "I don't exactly get the feeling that Rotti is going to hurt you but just be wary. You seem like a smart girl, don't let him take advantage. If you're in a position to save yourself do." Lottie feebly reached out to the young woman, hand shaking with the effort.
Shilo gratefully took the strange woman's hand and wondered just what had happened to her. She seemed so kind, as kind as her father could be but … she wasn't hiding anything from her. "Thanks Lottie."
Lottie almost cringed as she watched the young, hopeful kid turn her gaze towards GraveRobber. He was not going to offer similar words, she knew, but she didn't want to see the poor girl shut down like that. The world was shit but maybe Shilo had a few more moments of naivety before she was shit upon. GraveRobber opened his cocky mouth to say something and Lottie, using her last feeble amount of strength, pinched his leg.
"What the fuck?" He growled, staring down at Lottie as she purposefully avoided his eyes. That little shit, getting me to shut my mouth huh. He jostled her body and smirked as he watched her wince.
"Uh?" Shilo queried, feeling as if she were missing out on something.
"Oh nothing." GraveRobber purred, watching the girl blush and avert her gaze. Lottie would have pinched the shit again for playing around with the kid but she was barely able to keep her eyes open.
The remainder of the ride was marked with comfortable silence. Lottie felt herself slipping in and out of consciousness. Her pain level had surpassed anything she had ever experienced before … it was almost as if her brain was no longer processing the feelings, leaving her in a state of white noise. Time seemed to speed up and slow down at the same time. Lottie watched as a rain drop seemed to wind its way down Shilo's arm at a snail's pace, catching on every arm hair. At the same time she watched the lines of the road flash out from under the garbage truck in barely visible blurs. Lottie thought she blacked out but the next moment she registered Shilo jumping down from the vehicle and GraveRobber demurely bowing to her retreating figure. And then she was floating in nothingness or was it in everything? Lottie blinked and GraveRobber was carrying her down another alleyway. Holy shit is time even real anymore? I honestly think this is what dying feels like. GraveRobber took a sudden turn and began to jog to a seemingly abandoned building. Yet, when he walked them through the threshold she was met with the sight of an eclectically furnished studio apartment. The furniture was a beautiful collection of gothic and rococo. She saw an open living area of plush, ornate chairs, settees, end tables, and book shelves blending into a fully furbished kitchen with top of the line ranges and refrigerator as well as grand table and luxurious chandeliers. Lottie's mouth dropped open. Holy shit does he ever live in style. GraveRobber, though, passed all of these and instead headed for an obscured curtain in the back corner. He pulled back the plush, black velvet and revealed a king-sized bed situated on a hand-crafted frame of swirling iron vines and black roses. I think I can feel my jaw scraping the carpet. He rather gently laid Lottie onto the bed and she locked eyes with her friend.
"You have some pretty sweet –" Lottie began groggily, but she was rudely cut off.
"Cut the shit Lottie. What. The. Fuck. Happened?" GraveRobber grit out through his clenched jaw as he saw the broken body splayed before him. He shouldn't care, but he felt a kind of kinship towards the girl. Nothing romantic by any stretch, he just felt something for the first time in an eternity.
"Luigi and I had a little play date," Lottie joked, but quickly explained as she caught the glint in the man's eye. "Okay, I guess Luigi didn't appreciate my tone when I was making him coffee so he beat the ever loving shit out of me. He broke some ribs, my leg, and gave me full body bone bruises … a Repo Man repaired most of the damage but I didn't take the zydrate he gave me for the pain and uh didn't really rest at all because Pavi decided to fuck me and then I had to go to the opening …." Lottie practically mumbled the last part, pointedly looking at the wall behind GRaveRobber.
"I honestly think you want to die you little shit. And why the hell didn't you take the zydrate for the pain? Some noble misguided Lottie idea no doubt." GraveRobber wanted to throttle the moron.
"Well actually I didn't want to risk addiction thank you very much and … oh wooooaah." Lottie felt like she were falling as her equilibrium gave out. "Sorry I just got really fucking dizzy."
"You're going to take some zydrate right now. I'm going to watch you. Nothing to worry about."
"Why are you being so nice?" Lottie resignedly asked.
"Oh no my dear you will owe me for this in the future don't you fret." GraveRobber smirked, turning to grab a vile from his hidden stash.
Lottie let out a weak wheeze of laughter that sounded more like the air leaving a balloon. "Good, I wouldn't expect anything less. At least let me supply the goods. If you reach into my handbag you'll find a vile."
"So you had the drugs the whole time and still didn't help yourself? Unbelievable." GraveRobber rolled his eyes as he took the blue vile and loaded it into his gun.
He briskly walked toward his … whatever she was to him … and slowly lowered himself onto the bed next to her. He brought the gun down to her thigh when Lottie, being herself, interjected.
"G.R. can you promise me you'll never let me do this again? I'll use all of my willpower to avoid it in the future, but should I come to you … for whatever reason. Please stop me. I've seen what this shit does to a person and I can't afford to be like that. Literally," She snorted the last part.
GraveRobber looked down at the woman before him, watched as her eyelids struggled to stay open more than half-mast. Watched as her chest slowly heaved in each shallow breath. How the fuck did I end up in this situation?
"Of course." Were the only words he could muster as he pushed the needle into the tantalizing flesh of her inner thigh and triggered the injection of the pulsing blue drug. He grimaced as the chamber drained and looked into Lottie's face waiting.
"Oh … I …. I feel wonderful." Lottie sighed as her head lulled back.
"Come on L, shut your eyes and go to sleep."
"Okay."
And to GraveRobber's delighted shock … she did just that. Wow I think that's the only time she's fucking listened to anybody. He smirked as Lottie's body completely relaxed and her breathing evened. A small, contented smile graced her delicate face and GraveRobber had to force himself to not mimic the sickeningly sweet display. Yeah so zydrate could really fuck a person up, take them there and all that fun stuff, but what people tended to ignore was its actual purpose. Zydrate was a body sedative that sped-up the healing process. The goal was to knock a person out so they could recover and then bam wake up completely new. GraveRobber had to begrudgingly admit that Rotti had really been a genius with this creation.
"What a fucking day," GraveRobber sighed, running his hands through his long hair. From foraging, to a zydrate party and that fucking kid, to Amber and then Lottie, and now what? Giving Rotti Largo a proverbial pat on the back? Ha.
He took a quick glance toward the prone body, judged that the woman was not going to wake anytime soon, and decided he could risk a quick shower to rid himself of a day amongst dead and alive bodies. He made to stand up but found his gaze again drawn to the small woman. He paused. I can't leave her. Fuck that, he honestly began to himself, I don't want to leave her after that stupid promise. And like that GraveRobber was suddenly exhausted. He wearily scanned his room, contemplated changing into something more comfortable, realized he didn't want to take the energy to do so, and flopped down next to Lottie. This stupid little shit is going to be the death of me. And he too was gone.
Never again will I promise anyone to publish something in a set time as it inevitably backfires. I wish my creativity was on 24/7 but sadly I am easily drained after work and find myself drawn towards movies or literature rather than working on the things I wish to work on. Hopefully this little story is enough to keep people interested regardless of the erratic updates and insanely long gaps. Thank you deeply to all those who read!