The Maze

Author's note: I'll be trying a new style just for this chapter, please tell me if you like it.

After I awoke I found this scribbled in my diary. Wynne says the writing isn't dangerous. She knows these things better than I.

The Stamina drains from it's weary home. Awake for too long. Your heart and so much else is broken. Sleep rest.

You awaken to slumber. Covered in snow. Wounds healed. Bright eyed and bushy tailed as they say. It's snowing.

Just like the winters when you were a girl. You clamber out of the embankments ecstatic. Yes this was all just a nightmare. "Mom, Dad, Fergus!" you yell with joy. But then you look up.

This castle is too big and grand to be Highover. And are those mountains? No. Your realize you are somewhere else. Clever girl.

You look to the sky. It's covered in grey. A beautiful full moon above. And then something soars above, swooping down low enough that you hold your helmet and duck.

Is that a griffon? You think. But you know those are extinct. But then you think of the little boy. Right then I think I made my biggest mistake.

You walk ahead and see a face you know to be on the other side. Duncan? This you know to be impossible.

He tells you of your incredible victory. The triumph over the darkspawn, the death of the archdemon, the resurrection of the Griffons, the Grey Wardens retired from their duty to eternal glory. But that is not your fantasy is it. Odd, it worked on all the others of your kind. What a disloyal soldier. And yet you chose to fight on. If you want war and death you want you shall have it.

You hack down your comrades like it is just another battle. You know their dead and gone. And they were never truly the ones you cared about in your heart of hearts. Oh I know who those are.

You look for a way out and find only a pedestal. You look down and see the map or runes and throw your finger forward to the next world. A leap into the void. So you're one of those heroes. Lovely.

The world changes before you and you shift into a ruin in a bog.

I see you've met Niall, the savior of the Circle. You think he might have the answers. The wonderful thing about Niall is that he knows what problems he needs to solve and roughly how to solve them. And yet a strong will would have served him far better than his sharp mind. Sloth has set in and he knows he has no hope. But oh how he resisted. It's fun to have to work for your food.

You learn you are all trapped. Doomed to wander my maze for eternity, or until your bodies starve.

You know of the Litanny and why do you ask as if that will change anything. Just be like Niall and accept the rest I offer. Your looking for a way out. He tell you of the obstacles. And you are relieved. There is an objective to fight towards, a task to complete. No matter how impossible you know your path. Yeah you are one of those heroes.

On a hunch you try the floating gate of purple. The demon is one of rage, but that is nothing new to you. What is new is a mouse man. Poor little mousy. The one he got his power from gave him the same mission as yours.

You think of small things. Of stealth and the fear of being stomped on. You remember the oger. And you remember the Witch of the Wilds. I wonder what she will do to the boy Conner when word of your failure gets back? Will she make it gentle on him?

You feel yourself shrink. Your on the floor on all fours like an infant. The world seems even bigger. You see the gate. My catspaw doesn't put up much of a fight against a warrior of your caliber.

You head through another gate but now your lost. You meander through doors and portals. I would never have expected the wisp wraiths to give you so much trouble.

You think you've got it all figured out. Just keep pressing through the doors and eventually you'll find Yevena. What else can you do in the ever shifting world of the fade. But it only gets you back where you started. Your shape changes give foolish Niall hope. You like that. You are both so dull. You see doors you can't get through. It seems saving this world is beyond your capabilities. Not surprising.

You go to the portal and warp to another world. One with the feel of the taint. It was once one of your Grey Warden Castles. Now it lies in ruins. A monument to your order's failure. You vow you will not let such a thing happen in Ferelden. And you think of your Grey comrade dear Alistair. Isn't young love so sweet. Hush child you can lie to him but you can't lie in your dreams.

Look at what I give you. Sleep cures your wounds. And you learn so much when your mind takes time to process the lessons of the day. Why won't you accept my gifts?

Darkspawn are an old enemy but you've never faced them alone before. Like children holding each other for comfort. That's what you and Alistair are like. All the true Grey Wardens died at Ostagar. Now was that my thought or yours I can't remember?

You don't think much. Another corredor another darkspawn, another hole to crawl through, that last one makes you laugh. Would it have been better to give you a world with hundreds of virile men to serve your every whim. I still can if you let me. No? What a prude.

All the ways are blocked. By fire or massive doors. Niall tore his hair out over this but you simply think of it as math. Door + massive force+no door. Fire = fire.

Their must be some other forms you can assume to get through. And they must be in the other worlds. So off to the portal you go. You briefly consider what would happen if I left no way to get through. You decide that you might as well be doing something.

Into another realm of fire. The templar's don't bother you merely as much as they did on the outside. Did my fellows inoculate you of fear? I so do love a challenge.

Do you like the hounds I send? I made them just for you. You always did like to lie down by the fire with your precious Griffon. Cuddling up against him while he nuzzles you with his ridiculous snout. I wonder what Arl Howe would have done with your hellhound if he'd captured it. Maybe served it up to you as dinner, a wonderful image I've made you think about.

You crawl through a mousehole to find my Templar friend. Ah now that was a true warrior, It took me ages to wear him down, but I suspect you know that. Why if you hadn't just grabbed that lyrium vein in desperation you'd probably be dead. You thought of Wynne then and how she managed to survive and save you all. What an abominable creature you have aligned yourself with. Hypocrite.

Did the Templar not realize that death was not just another form of sleep? Don't weap for him child, he was beyond saving, as are you all. Even with your new form.

You enjoy that form don't you. Running through my mages nightmare slaughtering with your fireballs. Most mortals are afraid of flames. You are too. But in this form you are not Elissa Cousland. You imagine yourself as a fire creature not afraid of flame. And get so into the role that you start to have no fear of it yourself.

You've never fought a Golem before? How odd, I always thought Grey Wardens were close to the dwarves.

That mage had been so scared the Chantry would discover his secrets. But now I know them all, The only thing he has faith in is you.

I knew you'd love being a Golem. Not only that but you you imagine yourself to be the strongest of them, crushing puny humans like ants. And so as your mind wills the fade makes.

I laugh along with your rampage. This will be entertaining. Perhaps you will be tired by the maze, start to doubt, and then this nightmare will continue forever. But you don't. You keep going master your forms and you kill my associates. Now I worry. What's more I start to lose sight of you. The fade is becoming as much your world as mine.

For the first time in forever I am afraid. And it feels good.

From time to time I hear from you. When your lost and don't know where to go. When you for a minute think that "maybe I'll be stuck here forever." But I see how your form changes each time. How your willpower and strength grow. And I know these visits will be short lived.

I learn of what and where you are though the screams of my underlings, and lost servants.

I feel you gain another form. That of spirit, Light as a feather. It makes you feel calm, relaxed. I know I face doom. It may have been a mistake to take in so many at once. None of them were as strong as you. But each collected a piece of the puzzle and now their savior has all the pieces. Oh dear. And Now I lose charge of even this story. We will meet personally you and I to settle this. You have impressed me. No matter who wins or loses you really need a rest.

I know.

Ulthiki is quite the boxer. His blows knock me back on my heels even in Gollum form. I summon my strength and drive my fist into his face. Ha my third Ogre kill, take that Archdemon. A voice reminds me that it's only a fade Ogre. I resolve to count it anyways.

I return to the Templar's nightmare. With my new form I can now go through all the doors and end this. All on my own I can defeat Demon swarms that once would have troubled the entire party. It's enthralling. I begin to wonder if I might lose myself in these powers

Fighting feels like I'm floating in a dream. Like I have to hold onto myself. A trick I learn, think of something from your life that reminds you of your power and it will come to you. For example I summon ice spells by thinking of the snow me and Fergus used to play in.

The puzzles are solved and the demon's other minions fall quickly before me.

I find Alistair in a dream. With his sister and her children. He is so happy. I try to get him out without fighting. Goldana insisted though. I tell Alistair to think back to how he got here. He remembers. I hate ruining Alistair's happiness. The demon has the mercy to drop the disguise from the children. Or maybe I just imagine them as skeletons to make it easier. No. They were skeletons. Any doubt will be my downfall. It's good to have Alistair by my side again. I place a comforting hand on his shoulder and promise not to tell everyone how easily fooled he was. It's not his fault. Everyone has there fantasy, it's just that the demon was unable to guess mine.

Then just like that ripples appear and Alistair is carried away from me. I run to the portal. I can't feel doubt or weakness so I admit something else to myself instead, I love him. I will clear out the other islands, rescue my comrades, and find him. After that we'll have to see what the future holds.

The obstacles in the burning tower are no problem for me now. The rage demon seems like a mere nuisance on my path to the portal. He tells me his name. I don't care. I suppose forgetting him means he's really dead.

I find Wynne mourning over her fallen friends. I wonder if I've seen their bodies in the past hours of fighting. She's given up. I can't believe it. She's wallowing in grief not living a fantasy. I suppose she believed fighting was futile. I help her remember that her task is not done. I don't know what that task is though. She is free and then she leaves too. I have to press on. Ignore the worry. Ignore the distractions. I can't help them if I stay put. The enemy I face is stillness. If I look back I am lost.

Leliana is praying with a Revered Mother. She claims not to even know me. That hurts, oddly enough. She escapes through finding faith in her vision. The same thing happens. She at least remembers me now. And the task we have to accomplish.

It is time to confront sloth. But I still can't reach the center. That's when I remember the Spirit door, and Niall. I sitl cannot rouse him from entropy. And we have no time to waste. I transform into a spirit and pry open the door.

I quickly shift into my burning woman form and throw a fireball. Then I enlarge myself into a gollum. She freezes me and her goons hack at me and for a moment I fear death. But once the spell wears off we both know how this will end.

I don't attempt to rouse Nial. I merely tell him I'll be back. He nods sullenly. At last the portal to the central island is open.

You, Sloth, try to feign confidence. Call me a child, a slave. But I can read you as much as you can read me. I know you fear. My friends appear. Behind me. Yeah friends not comrades or soldiers or whatever. Their ready too.

You offer me happiness. I think of all I've lost and all I've gained. I tell you I'll make my own.

Your forms are tricky but I've faced them before.

Cursed mortal. Maybe a chill will freeze them all like your cold heart.

Alistair, Wynne, Leliana no.

Yes girl now it's just you and me.

You've just made a big mistake.