ACT III
INT. SHEFFIELD DINING ROOM - THREE YEARS LATER
The family sits around, looking pretty much the same.
SUPER: Three Years Later.
Maxwell enters to serve breakfast. C.C. joins him to serve
juice.
MAXWELL
Well, Miss Fine, can you believe
it's been three years since I
first arrived with that ridiculous
vacuum cleaner?
C.C.
Can you believe I still don't know
how to use it?
She laughs to herself.
NILES
It's no surprise to any of us that
you suck and the vacuum doesn't.
C.C.
Is that supposed to be dirty?
NILES
Is the floor?
BRIGHTON
Isn't it kind of weird how all
this time has passed, but we all
seem exactly the same?
FRAN
No, not really. I've been 29 for
much longer than three years.
MAGGIE
Really, though, it feels more like
yesterday that Max joined us.
GRACE
That's because it was.
MAXWELL
No, it couldn't have been
yesterday. Because yesterday-
FRAN
Mr. Sheffield.
MAXWELL
Yesterday Miss Fine told me she
loved me!
Everyone's jaws drop.
FRAN
Well, yeah, okay, I did. But today
I took it back so... we're good.
MAXWELL
Oh, God, you're delusional!
GRACE
I'm telling you, we all are.
Everyone looks around.
MAXWELL
You know, I can't take this
anymore, Miss Fine. I'm done.
He tosses down the plate of food and marches out of the
room.
INT. KITCHEN - CONTINUOUS
Fran chases in after Maxwell.
FRAN
Hang on, Mr. Sheffield. Wait.
Would ya wait? Please!
He turns back to her.
MAXWELL
Wait? I've been waiting. I've been
avoiding. I've been worried about being
honest because I've not wanted to
lose a job that I love... with a
family whom I love... and...
FRAN
And?
They take a few steps toward each other.
MAXWELL
Well, and you... whom...
FRAN
Yeah?
She makes her way to him.
MAXWELL
Whom I...
C.C.
Oh, just say it already!
They look to the back stairwell to find C.C., Niles and all
the kids spying on them.
MAXWELL
But, C.C., it was you who told me
if I were to ever... if we were
ever to... I'd get fired.
C.C.
Oh, please. That was when I
thought I might have had a shot
with you myself. I think it's
pretty damn clear that isn't ever
going to happen.
NILES
Re-read the script, sweetie, I
believe that was my line. From
three years ago.
FRAN
Oh, could we get a little privacy,
please? Kids? And you two? We have
enough of our own sexual tension.
We really don't need yours.
They all complain, but head back up the stairs.
FRAN (CONT'D)
Look, it's true that I said I
loved you and took it back.
MAXWELL
Yes, I know. I was there.
FRAN
But that's because you didn't say
it back.
MAXWELL
I didn't say it back because I
didn't want to be just some other
man that you...
FRAN
That I what?
MAXWELL
Slept with and sent packing.
He hangs his head. Fran stares at him a long moment.
FRAN
Is that really what you think of
me? I mean, sure, I may have been
a serial dater in the... years...
following my divorce. But it
hasn't been that way in quite some
time. You know that, don't ya?
He looks back up at her.
MAXWELL
Why the change?
She shrugs.
FRAN
Well, you see, this man, he sold
me a couple of vacuums, served me
some killer latkes and stole my
previously lonely heart.
MAXWELL
And does he still have it? Your
lonely heart?
She nods.
FRAN
Yeah, but ya know, it's not so
lonely since he's been around.
He takes a step toward her.
FRAN (CONT'D)
Which is very scary to a woman
like me. After all, the last man
who had my heart threw it out like
spoiled milk.
MAXWELL
Oh, but you see, you don't throw
out spoiled milk. You turn it into
buttermilk for recipes that are
richer and more complex than
anything you can do with milk.
FRAN
Well, now, that sounds like me:
Rich and complex.
MAXWELL
But, listen, Miss Fine. If you
need time, I understand. Perhaps
we could be friends instead.
Fran considers this.
FRAN
Nope. I'm good.
She grabs him and pulls him into a kiss. He kisses her back
with reckless abandon. They part just slightly only to kiss
again.
FRAN (CONT'D)
Oh, Mr. Sheffield-
MAXWELL
I think you can call me Max now.
FRAN
And you can call me-
MAXWELL
Fran...
They kiss again. And again. And again.
DISSOLVE TO:
BRIGHTON
Fran! Fran?! Are you okay?!
MAGGIE
Dad? Daddy!
C.C.
Maxwell?
MAXWELL
(groggy)
Just call me Max...
C.C.
Oh, well, okay-
MAXWELL
Fran.
C.C.
Oh boy.
FRAN
Oh, Max.
C.C.
Oh, God.
She rolls her eyes and heads for the door.
C.C. (CONT'D)
Clearly, they're fine.
Fran and Maxwell seem to come out of it.
FRAN
Oh, my head.
MAXWELL
I had the strangest dream.
MAGGIE
It wasn't a dream.
They all look at her.
MAGGIE (CONT'D)
It was a delusion.
Everyone looks around at each other, confused.
FADE TO BLACK.
END OF ACT