A few moments had passend, in which Tarrant just stayed in front of the mirror, watching the glass that Alice had gone through. She was gone. She really left, left him again. Again she was gone and there was nothing he could have done to keep her.
His heart was hurting and his head spinning. He didn't want to believe that she was never going to come back. That couldn't be true. She had to come back. Surely she would come back some day.
That's what the hatter told himself. Nobody seemed to know or even understand what was going on inside of him. He didn't even know himself.
Behind him, the others shared concerned and sad expressions. Nobody dared to say something. It was an awkward silence in which they all feared to say something wrong. After all, nobody wanted to upset the hatter.
It was Mallymkun, who finally managed to get a hold of her voice.
,,Hatter"! She called soft and carefully ,,are you ok"? Slowly he turned around to face his friends. He wasn't smiling. Sadness covered his features. ,,Yeah..I think I am.." the hatter murmured and stepped away from where he was standing ,,Thanks Mally..". Without another gaze, he just walked past them.
,,Aww poor Hatter" Mallymkun sniffed ,,It breaks my heart to see him like that". ,,Yeah" Bayard agreed ,,It hit him pretty hard". ,,I can't believe she's really gone" Mallymkun wiped the fresh tears away. ,,Well, but we all knew it would come" Mc Twisp hopped at the Bloodhounds side ,,We knew she would leave again". ,,But we wanted her to stay"! Deedle Dee said ,,I will miss her a lot". ,,Me too" his brother Deddle Dum added. ,,What now"? Thackary looked into the direction in which the hatter walked. ,,Maybe we should go and cheer him up" Mc Twisp suggested. ,,No"! Another voice joined the discussion. It was Chessur. His smile had also faded. ,,I think it's the best, that we leave him alone for a while. Besides..." He flew ahead and also pointed towards the hatter, who was walking to the Hightopps. ,,He just got his family back. He should spent some time with them now". ,,Right" Mallymkun shook her head to pull herself together ,,And if he needs us, we will be there" her eyes gleamed determinded ,,I just hope, he wont fall into a deadly depression again".
It didn't take long for Tarrants family to sense something happened when he returned with a face of pure sadness. His mother was the first one who rushed up to her son. ,,Oh dear, Tarrant! What happened"? ,,She's gone"! He simply answered in a low and quiet voice. More to himself than to the others. ,,Who? Who is gone"? Tyva asked, while tilting her head to examine her sons face better. ,,Alice" Tarrant blinked. ,,Alice? The blonde girl"? His fahter rose his voice while Tarrant just nodded. Zaniks features softened. With a gaze to his wife, he also found she was thinking the same. He had watched his son and Alice earlier. He'd already guessed his son liked her but now it was even clearer to him. ,,I am sorry son" he finally said, while putting his hand on his shoulder. ,,But look what you did. You saved us all". ,,No" Tarrant interrupted him and lifted his head ,,No I didn't". ,,I don't understand" his mother looked at him no less confused that the rest of the family. ,,What do you mean"? ,,I did not save you" Tarrant repeated ,,Alice did"! ,,Alice"? Zanik frowned. ,,Alice saved you! And she saved me"! Tarrant stepped into the middle ,,Alice took the cromosphere and traveled into the past to warn you all because I thought I had lost you. I though you were..." he stopped for a second. Tears gleaming in his eyes ..I thought you were dead"! ,,Oh no, Tarrant" his mother stepped back at his side to rub his arm comforting. The rest of his family, including his father just looked at him deeply emotional.
,,I had found that old paper piece of my first hat" Tarrant continued ,,I thought, if it survived, you must have too"! He looked around with a small smile ,,I wanted to save you and so I asked everybody to help me find you" but then his expression fell again ,,But no one believed me". Tarrant paused again, shuttering at the thought of his depression that almost killed him. ,,Then, I fell into depression" he finished and his whole family gasped in shock. His mother looked as if she was ready to faint while his father gritted his teeth. ,,And we couldn't do anything" Zanik hissed under his breath. He felt terrible that the and his son had those many fights. Hearing what his son had gone through broke his heart. It made him feel like he failed as a good father.
,,But Alice.." Tarrant rose his voice again and a smile came back on his lips as he spoke her name ,,My Alice saved me! She saved me and she saved you all". ,,Pity we can't thank her anymore" his sister gave it a sad pound and Tarrants smile faded once more. ,,Paloo" Tyva hissed next to her and she immediately lowered her head in shame ,,Sorry mother". For one thing, the hightopps were in fact very intelligent people. It ran in the family and every one of them understood that Tarrant obviously liked that Alice. Knowing that, it was to avoid anything that could make him even sadder.
Eventhough Paloo had bunches of questions burning in her mind, she decided to keep them to herself. Seeing her brother as sad as he was, she couldn't bare to ask him any more of that Alice girl.
,,I think it's best we go home now" Tvya declared with a look to her husband. ,,But what about the family reunion party"? Bumalig heckled and earned a stern gaze from her younger sister.
,,Uhm.." Tarrant cleared his throat and instantly his family looked back at him. ,,I am very happy to have you all back but..." he looked down at his hands ,,But I think I need some time alone". Tvya tilted her head and went up to hug her son ,,Of course sweetie" she put her hand on his cheek ,,If you need anything, you know where to find us. We are back now". ,,Your mother is right" Zanik took a deep breath ,,You can always come to us if you want to talk. I just hope, after everything, you can still trust me". Tarrant turned once more to face his father. ,,I already forgave you". A relived smile spread on Zaniks lips and they hugged again. ,,If you'd excuse me now" Tarrant gave them a last smile and then turned away to walk ahead.
He really didn't feel like smiling at all, so it faded again as soon as he turned his back on his family. All he wanted now, was to get out of that clock tower and get some fresh air. His emotions were a twirling tornado and he had no idea if he should scream or cry. Maybe both.
Finally he stepped out of the clock tower. It was already dawning and the air was colder now. Tarrant took a deep breath. He welcomed the feeling of wind brushing his face. He needed to calm down.
,,Hatter wait"! The small voice of Mallymkun echoed behind him, followed by the hopping steps of the march hare. A bit taken by surprise Tarrant turned his head. He'd completely forgotten about his friends for a while. But they were still there.
,,Mally"! He called as he got down on his knees to catch her in his hands. ,,I am sorry I just went ahead without you". ,,It's fine" she smiled at him understanding. ,,But please...Are you really ok Tarrant"? Her eyes looked firmly at him. ,,I don't know Mally" the hatter admitted honest. ,,It's ok. We're all here for you"! Mallymkun put her small white hand on his cheek. At the gesture a small smile crept back to Tarrants lips. It was the same gesture his mother gave him and it filled him with a warm comforting feeling. It was soothing somehow. ,,Let's go home" he declared with a look to Mallymkun and Thackery and rose to his feet. Silently and with no more words, they walked back home together.
,,Hatter"! Mallymkuns voice pulled him back from his trance. ,,Hm"? Tarrant lifted his head, looking around and then back to the white mouse, who had her hands on her hips, looking unpleased. ,,Sorry Mally, where were we"? He rose his eyebrows and his lips to a excusing grin. ,,The new hats you made"? Mallymkun sighed and shook her head. ,,Oh yes yes" Tarrant lifted his hand to continue his story ,,So I..." suddenly he stopped with a frown, as his gaze went up into the air where a certain teal striped cat appeared.
,,I am truly sorry to interrupt your highly interesting chat" the lazy voice purred. Grinning Chess floated right above the many tables. ,,Greetings to you all" he started while examining the three who were sitting. Mallymkun was the first one to speak. ,,Chessur"! She called out happily. Ever since he'd saved the Hatter from getting his head chopped off, she used to like him more than ever. ,,Hello Chessur" Tarrant greeted as well ,,Care for some tea"? Chess vanished and reappeared shortly again right down at the chair he usually sat down on. ,,Thanks" he purred ,,But that's not why I'm here". ,,It's not"? Tarrant gave it a confused frown. ,,No" the striped cat repeated in a promising tone, tracing the edge of one cup.
Mallymkun stood on her feet, looking over to Chessur with huge curiousity ,,Tell us Chess, tell us"! ,,Fine! A certain someone returned to us" Chessur declared, grinning even wider. ,,Alice"!? Tarrant and Mallymkun shouted coincident so Thackary who was napping, shot his ears up straight as arrows at the sound of the name. ,,What? Who? Alice? Where"? He threw his head left and right. ,,Alice is back"? Tarrants mood lightened up in a way it hadn't for three years and his heart started to pound as if it wanted to jump out of his chest. ,,Right"! Chessur confirmed ,,Alice is back"! ,,But how is that possible"? Mallymkun jumped down from where she was standing ,,I thought she said she won't come back"!
Suddenly Tarrant gazed over to her with a stern expression, his smile faded into a frown and his eyes flickered in a pale orange. Instantly the white mouse lowered her ears ,,Oooh...Oops...Sorry" she murmured, covering her mouth. Knowing it was a very big No-no to bring up certain topics. Alice leaving, was one of it.
Tarrant cleared his throat, turning his attention back to the grinning cat. ,,You better be not lying" he said. His voice still low and serious. ,,Tarrant please" Chessur looked at him ,,I wouldn't dare to joke about that". ,,I knew she'd come back! I just knew it" Mallymkun cheered again while Thackery laughed along. Tarrant recovered quickly and his bright smile came back. ,,Well were is she now"? Chessur floated back into the air ,,She's at Mamoreal. With the white queen". Energetic Tarrat rose, knocking over some cups and cakes. ,,What are we waiting for then? Off we go. Quick, quick, hurry. No wasting time"! he declared as he hurtled past the long tables, catching Mallymkun in the process. Now knowing that his Alice was back, he couldn't leave the place soon enough. ,,Hey, wait for me"! Thackery threw a cup after the Hatter and Mallymkun who was now sitting on his shoulder giggling. ,,Well then. I'll go and get the twins and the rabbit" Chessur raised his voice again, floating ahead ,,I'll meet you at the castle"! ,,Don't take too long"! Mallymkun called after him, while Tarrant ignored him completely. He was way to excited. All he wanted now, was to get to Miranas place and that as quick as possible.
Both Tarrant and Mallymkun walked a while until she started talking again ,,I can't believe she's back. Isn't that wonderful"? Mallymkun clapped her tiny hands. ,,Oh it's absolutely wonderful" The Hatter agreed and then gazed back into the distance. No words could describe how he was feeling inside. His thoughts were running wild. He really couldn't believe it. Alice was back. His dear Alice. Though he didn't quite understand it. Two years ago, she had told him, that she might never return, and he believed her. It had broken his heart into pieces. It had hurt him more than he had ever thought it would hurt him. It had hurt him in a way he didn't even know it could hurt him. He just never accepted the thought of Alice never returning.
He had dreamed about her numerous times, but even he had to realize eventually, that dreams weren't reality. It just wasn't the same without her.
The pretty blonde had become a inconceivable part of everyone and he had missed her more than anything. Tarrant thought back of the first few months. After some time his sadness had turned into anger. He was mad at himself for letting her go. Nobody was allowed to speak about her leaving or even about the time in the clock tower. It made him furious and he didn't know why. It stabbed him like a dagger, like a sword and to circumvent the feelings, he just avoided everything that reminded him of that day.
However, Alice was back and there were no reasons for him to think on that day anymore. The closer he came to the castle, the more his excitement grew. With every step he took, his heart sped up. In fact, he was so focused on finally seeing Alice, that he didn't even notice when Chessur and the others caught up to them. Mallymkun seemed to get more nervous as well. Tarrant could hear her letting out squeaks of excitement. ,,Almost there Mally, Almost there" he assured.
Alice paced through the garden impatient. She couldn't recall the last time she had been so nervous. Why was she so nervous? Mirana watched the blonde with amusement but suddenly she turned her head as if she heard something. ,,I think they're coming" she said, the smile back on her dark lips. Alice stopped abruptly and turned to the white queen ,,They're there"?. ,,On the way. Almost there"! Mirana explained ,,Let's go and great them then, shall we"? Gracefully she turned on her heels, her hands moving swiftly. Alice followed her quickly. Jogging, to keep up with the white queen. Her heart was hammering up to her ears. Her hands were cold and sweaty and her stomach was tightening up. She felt almost dizzy. Her mind flashing Questions. How would they react? How would, he, react if he saw her?
In front of the castle they stopped. Mirana next to Alice, lifted her chin, eyes gleaming joyfully. Alice heart stood still, as she spotted the small group of familiar faces coming closer and closer. Her eyes widened and instantly tears welled up in her eyes.
Tarrant as well, stopped for a second. His heart fell at the sight before him. There she was, his Alice. Still a bit far away, but he instantly recognized her. He, after all, would recognize, her, anywhere. It was by no doubt Alice. His Alice. She was really here. She finally returned.
,,There she is"! Mallymkun called and pointed into her direction, jumping on his shoulder. ,,It's Alice! Its really her"! One of the Tweedles began ,,I told you it's her! Told you she would come back"! ,,No I told you she would come back"!
Chessur who floated next to them grinned up to his ears and wiggled his tail from one side to the other. Purring loudly ,,Told you"! Mallymkun, who now realized that the Hatter stood frozen, stopped her happy jumping and stomped her foot. ,,Hatter"! she called ,,What are you doing? Keep walking"! ,,Hhm"? Tarrant again, flinched from his trance and quickly gazed up to a very inpatient dormouse. ,,Yeah, uhm sorry"! He mumbled and kept walking. Sooner than expected he was close enough to where Alice and the white queen were standing. The biggest smile spread upon his lips, as he made a few steps towards the blonde.
Alice blinked. There they were. Her friends. Looking at her as awestruck and emotional as she herself. And there he was, looking at her with his bright green eyes. His lips formed the smile she had missed so much, revealing the little gap between his teeth. Her lips were trembling. ,,Hatter"! Alice yelled and instantly took off running. Running straight up to him, she threw herself into his arms so quickly, that he slightly bent and stumbled backwards. Mallymkun had just the time to jump off his shoulder. Without thinking, Tarrant wrapped his arms around Alice waist and pulled her even tighter. ,,Oh Alice"! He called ,,You're back"! ,,I'm back"! Alice sobbed happily as she pressed her head into the side of his neck ,,I am back"!. After a few seconds of hugging, they let go to look at each other. ,,I am so happy to see you Hatter"! Alice aspirated, tears still rolling down her cheeks. ,,I am so happy too"! Tarrant cheered, examining her from top to bottom ,,It's really you isn't it"? For a moment he feared it might be another dream he would wake up to, so he reached up to touch her face. ,,It's really me"! Alice chuckled ,,I am really here"! and Tarrant smiled even wider. ,,Look at you" he mused ,,You have changed". Alice snickered ,,Yes. I got older Tarrant. I am not a child anymore". A flash of surprise shot across his face, as he heard his name from her mouth. He couldn't recall many times, when Alice called him by his name. Quickly he shook himself out of his thoughts ,,Of course not"! Tarrant chuckled ,,I know that. I didn't mean it in a bad way. You changed in a good way. You look wonderful. Delightful, lovely, marvelous, gorgeous, fabulous.."! ,,Hatter"! Alice stopped his rambling. Still laughing. ,,Sorry" he whispered. ,,Oh dear, I missed you so much"! she wiped her tears. Tarrant didn't know what to do whit all his emotions. At one point, he just wanted to pull her back into his arms but since all the others stood around them, watching, he just kept smiling at her. ,,I have so much to tell you, how about we.." he couldn't finish his sentence since Mallymkun broke them off with her clearing her throat.
,,Do you mind"? She looked at them and then to Alice ,,We would like to greet her as well"! Alice lowered herself down to the white mouse with a big smile ,,Hello Mallymkun". ,,Alice"! The white mouse called in joy and hopped onto her shoulder with ease. ,,Oh I missed you Alice"! Loving the blonde tilted her head a bit so Mallymkun could hug her face. ,,I knew you'd come back"!
,,What about us"? The tweedles called. ,,Oh, of course" Alice got down to her knees and Mallymkun jumped back onto Bayard. ,,We missed you so much Alice" Tweedle Dee started ,,Very much" Tweedle Dum added ,,Wasn't as bright here without you", ,,We were always thinking about you". Alice laughed again and bent in to hug them ,,Thank you my friends, I was thinking about you too". And as Mc Twisp also joined in, Alice could barely separate the many voices of her friends anymore. All scrambling to hug her and talking all at once.
Mirana, who had recognized the hatters unease, gazed over to him. Eventhough he watched the scene in delight, something seemed to bother him. His smile wasn't as bright as it had been a few moments ago. Mirana already guessed his desire, so she decided she had to help them up a bit. Clearing her throat graciously she clapped her hands. Instantly everyone turned their attention to her. ,,Let's give Alice and Tarrant some time alone shall we? Alice will surely have enough time to spent with everyone of you later". With a smile she looked at Alice and then back to Tarrant who already furrowed his brows in confusion. Mallymkun seemed to understand the unspoken words of the queen quicker than the rest. ,,Yeah, she's right, let's get inside, we'll have enough time later". Mc Twisp wiggled his nose but it didn't take him long either to understand that he'd better listen to the queen ,,Agreed, lets get inside"! Irritated the twins looked at each other and then up to Alice who was still smiling at them. ,,I don't get it" one of them said. ,,Me neither". ,,Time alone"? ,,Why"? ,,Not fair". ,,Get moving"! Mallymkun swung her sword and they kept walking. Alice didn't even have to say anything so she just watched amused. Mumbling the twins passed them and went up to the queen. Chessur gave Alice a wink, before he vanished with a huge grin of his. Tarrant still confused, glanced to the side, not quite getting the sudden change of situation while Alice kept on chuckling.
,,Well" Mirana made a movement with her hand ,,We shall see each other later then". ,,Alright" Alice smiled and watched them all leave, still mumbling and talking silently while they followed the queen back to the castle. Leaving her standing alone with the Hatter. Tarrant had his eyes fixed on them walking, trying to understand the gesture of the queen. Not that it didn't please him. In fact, he was kind of relieved they went inside so he could spent time alone with Alice. At least, that's what he had in mind after all.
,,Shall we go to the garden then"? Alice rose her voice and took the Hatter back from his trance. ,,Huh, oh, uh sure" he quickly answered. Smiling he offered her his arm which she gladly took. While they were walking alone, it suddenly clicked in his head and he got the hint. Now he was more than thankful towards the queen, for making them have some time alone. His grin got even wider as he understood.
Together they walked into one of the many gardens, surrounded by cherry blossom trees and small waterfalls.
Coming to a white bench, Tarrant led Alice to sit down first. ,,Thank you" she aspirated and waited until he sat himself next to her. A moment of silence passed until Tarrant rose his voice ,,So uhm.." the started a bit awkwardly, not really knowing how to start the conversation. ,,What made you come back.."? His voice went from his happy lisp to his usual low toned one. He wasn't quite sure why he started with this topic but for some reason he had to know. Something in him wished, that it had to do with him.
Alice turned to look at the hatter. Her expression fell a bit and her mouth opened. ,,I..." lowering her gaze she sighed ,,I thought it was obvious.." lifting her eyes back to him ,,I am so sorry Hatter". There was so much sadness in her voice that Tarrant instantly felt bad for reminding her. He surly made a mistake. ,,Why no, don't be"! Tarrant hurried to fix things ,,You don't have to be sorry Alice". ,,But I am"! she declared, tears gleaming in her eyes again ,,I know I thought I would never see you again...and I just left you all but...Oh Hatter, I wanted to come back all along. I never wanted it to be so that I could never come back. I was afraid"! For a moment Tarrant didn't say anything, he just listened and looked at her. ,,I know" he then whispered ,,You don't have to excuse yourself for anything my dear Alice" careful he reached his hand to her cheek, wiping her tears away. Finally, Alice smiled again and leaned into the soft touch.
Something had definitely changed. It was a small but meaningful moment for both of them. Both, shared a deep connection and trusted each other with their lives.
A warm tingling sensation shot through Tarrants body, as he felt her warmth in his hand. It wasn't quite new to him though. He had felt it before. Six years ago, when Alice came back a second time and he felt it three years ago, when she'd hugged him, when she'd touched him, whenever she'd looked at him. But never had he felt like he was feeling now. It was weird yet still new somehow. Never had he even thought about those feelings. They just were there.
However, he didn't want to spent too much of the time thinking of his feelings, he just wanted to value and enjoy the moment. At least he was alone with her, and that was what he'd wanted.
Alice swallowed. Fascinated she looked into his eyes, his green gleaming eyes that she could get lost in. Had these eyes always been that green?
A sudden rustle in the bushes made both Alice and Tarrant flinch away from each other like scared up deers. It was now that they realized how close they had been. A flash of red started to glow on Alice cheeks as she looked away. Running her fingers through her hair nervously. Tarrant on the other hand, just cleared his throat and tried to act as if nothing had happened.
~What happened earlier~
,,I told you this is a bad Idea" Mallymkun hissed at the others. ,,Shht" Mc Twisps nose twitched ,,What if they see us". ,,If they don't hear us first" Bayard lifted his eyes to his rider. ,,I want to know what they are talking about" Deedle Dee said ,,Lets get closer" Deedle Dum nodded to his brother. ,,No" Mallymkun frowned at them ,,Just be quiet". ,,I am quiet" one of them started ,,I am quieter! Much quieter. You are loud"! ,,I am loud? You are loud" and they started to stop on their feet. ,,Stop it" Mallymkun waved her paws. ,,Ough...this is a mess" Mc Twisp let his ears down, shaking nervously. ,,please, stop it" he also tried. Thackerys snicker made the whole situation even worse. It came as it had to come. One of the Deedles accidentally stepped on Bayards back paw. Yowling, the bloodhound jumped a bit, causing the brothers to stumble. Deedle Dee fell against Mc Twisp and Mc Twisp made Thackery fall straight through the bushes. The rest followed. Bayard was the only one standing, with a very mad and utterly ashamed Mallymkun on his head. Mc Twisp stumbled and hurried to his feed, panting. ,,Uh oh..." the twins said, gulping.
~ flashback end ~
As Alice and Tarrants gaze fell on the small group that just fell out of the bushes, their faces fell into a mixture of embarrassment, shock and anger. At least Tarrant seemed upset. His green eyes flickered into a light yellowish orange. Alice head went even redder.
,,We are so sorry" Mallymkun wiped her face ,,It's not what it looks like"! Mc Twisp waved his hands, knowing this statement wasn't bought at all. ,,We just happened to be here too"! Tarrants stern face made them understand that nothing they said, would change his mood now. ,,Just ignore us and forget what happened" Mallymkun declared ,,Just pretend it never happend". ,,We're going"! Bayard pushed the twins and the march hare into the other direction. Quickly they all hurried away, vanishing around the corner.
Tarrant waited a moment . As he felt his anger cool down, he turned to face Alice. ,,Alice"? He called her softly with a slight lisp. The blonde flinched slightly ,,I-I'm sorry...I...uh...I forgot something" quickly she stood up, ready to leave as well. ,,Alice wait. Please"! Tarrant stood up as well and reached for her hand. ,,I'm sorry"! ,,It's not your fault" Alice hurtled, blushing in a even deeper shade of red ,,Excuse me"! And with that she pulled her hand back, turned and rushed out of the gardens into the castle. Leaving a confused and disappointed hatter behind.