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Part One | Strike the Match
Fifteen. So Utterly un-Longbottom
Neville and Pansy reacted in a perfect unison as they grabbed their respective wands, both bringing the thin, magical instruments upwards in an identical narrow sweep. All thoughts almost forgotten of what had been mere seconds away from happening as the pair locked their eyes together for a brief - and somehow reassuring, second. Neville moved first, Pansy right behind as they swiftly crossed the floor of the greenhouse. Pansy's breath was unintentionally being held somewhere beneath her chest as she watched Neville throw the glass door open, his wand held high and concern now covering his face.
The scream echoed again, and Pansy hadn't contemplated the fact that the greenhouse walls muffled any outside noise and the piercing cry of distress felt altogether more alarming without the thick glass cushioning the sound. Instinctively, bringing her own wand up higher, Pansy poised herself in the position she needed to be in, to defend…
...or attack.
Neville stopped at the doorway, wand arm raised as he clearly scrutinised the vicinity of the grounds. His left arm had shot sideways, straight and still across the remainder of the doorway, essentially fencing Pansy in the greenhouse. She wrinkled her nose for a fleeting moment, having crashed into his temporary barrier. She had no time to evaluate her feelings towards his blatant act of protection, however, as a third, and arguably more alarming scream broke the silence echoing over the seemingly deserted landscape.
"The lake!" Neville cried.
The two shot off, Neville taking a hairbreadth of a lead, towards the Black Lake. Pansy could scarcely remember the last time she ran anywhere, pure adrenaline guiding her, allowing her to keep up with Neville's quick pace. Two further screams broke the surrounding air as they ran, this time closer together and fainter, the latter seeming to stop abruptly, as though altogether cut off.
The surface of the water became clear to Pansy the closer they got, and sure enough, various sparks could be seen flying. Some were fizzling into the black water, clearly having missed their intended target, others merely flying in the air haphazardly. There were a few, more than a few, that were obviously successful in their determined flight path. She and Neville slowed to a stop, inspecting the scene, and Pansy saw with certainty, the shape of a young girl on her knees; alone, and wandless.
Pansy didn't have to look far to find the other half of this sinister scenario, and in absolute horror, she counted not one opposing figure, but two. Two large bodies stood, not far away from the girl, lights darting from all of their wands. Their backs were to the Castle, and Pansy and Neville stood unseen for a short second before Pansy's peripheral vision informed her that Neville's wand was raised as he took aim. Spinning around, a plan having already formulated in her mind, she raised a hand, hoping to momentarily pause his advance and not wanting him to hex without hearing her first.
He spun on the spot, rounding on her, his face was unlike she had ever witnessed it. His stance alone was threatening.
"Don't you dare stop me, they're torturing her. She looks to be about a third year, and, Merlin," he pointed to the sky above the lake, "we're going to have company."
Pansy's eyes had widened in shock the moment he'd turned on her. A side of Longbottom that seemed so utterly un-Longbottom she would scarcely have believed it existed had she not seen it with her own eyes, and yet what felt the most unbelievable was not his actions, but his words - Don't you dare stop me. That's what he had said. He believed she wouldn't put a stop to this? Did he think she felt a loyalty to Crabbe and fucking Goyle right now? She glanced away from him briefly, his words still stinging, in order to see what he had seen in the sky and gasped. A genuine fear crept over her as a number of dementors had begun to make their way, soundlessly, towards the scene. Pansy's mind went into overdrive, and taking charge of the situation she said hurriedly, "Go for Goyle, I'll get Crabbe."
She heard Neville inhale sharply, and saw him quickly incline his head before his wand poised again, towards the head of Gregory Goyle.
Pansy herself reeled around, instantly spotting the figure of a girl she'd once considered a friend, a hollow, victory-fueled laugh emitted from Vincent Crabbe's cold stature.
"Stupefy!" she cried, mimicking the spell Neville had said loudly a second before.
Goyle hit the ground just as Crabbe began to fall, he hit the ground with an undignified and large thud that even Pansy, who was standing with Neville a good twenty feet away, heard quite clearly.
The girl by the water had been crouched on her knees with her head in her hands. Pansy saw her gingerly look up, gawking at the sight of her two attackers lying, unmoving, on the ground. Pansy breathed deeply, noticing the breath she'd taken was exhaled in a cloud of white mist whilst she simultaneously realised she had begun to shiver. Dementors. Shit.
"Longbottom, we need to move!"
"I know, I know…Hey! Come on!" Neville shouted, gesturing wildly to the girl by the lake. Luckily, she didn't need telling twice and Pansy watched, relieved as she began a sprint towards them. When the girl reached them Pansy saw her face had two distinct hex marks, resembling burns, and the collar of her grey T-shirt was torn badly, the garment close to coming undone entirely.
"C'mon!" Pansy cried to the young girl and Neville, knowing that the impending dementors left no time for either formalities or niceties.
Somehow, they made it within a close proximity to the castle, the sun was high in the cloudless sky and the picturesque Scottish view would have looked beautiful to Pansy - were she not running for her life from crazed soul-sucking creatures, of course. Risking a glance over her shoulder, Pansy's mind eased as she saw no sign of dementors close by. The only one currently visibly to her still looming over the forest, quite a distance away. Her two companions slowed to her lead and the unlikely trio halted, all gasping for breath.
The main doors to the castle were open, and the three began to walk towards the large entrance. It was Neville who spoke first, addressing the girl who looked no older than fourth-year, directly. "What's your name?" Pansy heard him enquire.
"Olivia," she replied, her voice barely more than a terrified sounding squeak.
"Okay, Olivia, I'm Neville. This...is Pansy. I'm going to take you to the Hospital Wing now, okay? Madame Pomfrey needs to see those marks on your face." Olivia nodded in response, her eyes still wide, but Pansy noted the alarm had left her expression somewhat at Neville's words.
"There's something I...we, need from you though, okay? When Madame Pomfrey asks you what happened, I need you to only mention me, not Pansy, can you do that?"
Olivia nodded, before turning to face Pansy. "Yes, I can. But...I'm really grateful."
Pansy gulped, nodding. She felt overwhelmed with everything, and yet nothing in particular. She wanted to scream, and cry, and hex the shit out of Crabbe and Goyle, wondering briefly whether the dementors would kiss their stupefied bodies, whilst only a second later realising that she didn't care if they did. Not knowing how to put anything into words, she continued nodding, mutely. Her eyes left Olivia's scarred face and looked up at Neville. Her admiration for him had increased ten-fold in the last fifteen or so minutes, yet, his words echoed through her all over again, a river of hurt flowing through her veins. Don't you dare stop me. She swallowed. Did you really believe I wanted to?
His eyes met hers, the pair of beautiful and unreadable blue orbs. "Can you wait, in the library, where we were earlier?"
Pansy let a long breath out through her nose, and yet again not trusting herself to emit a single word, nodded once and turned on her heel before her eyes betrayed her to him again. The three entered the Castle and separated; Neville and Olivia towards the Hospital Wing and Pansy towards the library, silently, as though it was no more than mere coincidence that brought them entering the Castle together at that moment.
The library was empty, for the most part. Something Pansy was altogether grateful for as she made her way through the countless shelves of heavy tomes, ending up at the exact table her and Neville had occupied only an hour, or so, prior. Most eventful hour of my fucking life.
Pansy's mind seemed to be in fast forward. She remembered the morning, where she'd fretted over her hair. Hair! Talk about a trivial problem.
The sight of Neville's rather pleasing midriff, and the memory of him closing himself into her drifted in and out of the view of her mind's eye. They'd been so close before they'd heard Olivia scream. Did I really almost kiss Neville Longbottom?
And then, of course there was his Don't you dare stop me. It had been accompanied by a look that Pansy hoped against hope that he never directed at her again. But the very fact it had been? Well, didn't that just prove he held significant doubt over her allegiances? Can't really blame him, Pansy thought with a heavy heart, wondering if this is what the rest of her days would entail.
Neville didn't take long to appear from the Hospital Wing, considering. Yet it had felt like an age to Pansy, who had sat, stark still, arms loosed over her chest. She felt his hand tap her shoulder lightly as he cleared his throat lightly. She turned her face to meet his and was relieved to see a small smile on his face. Doesn't seem like he absolutely hates me, at least that's something.
Neville, unlike Pansy, didn't take the same seat he'd been occupying this morning. Instead, he chose to take the seat nearest to his current position, next to her other side. Her arms tightened around herself as she waited for him to speak, feeling an unpleasant sinking feeling as he opened his mouth to address her. "I owe you an apology."
You...what? Pansy blinked, fairly certain she'd misheard. "For what?" Her words blunter than she intended.
"I...assumed...wrongly out there. It wasn't you. Please believe me when I say I would have reacted the same had I felt anyone was trying to stop me from...well, stopping that."
"You didn't think I was protecting them?"
"It...wasn't about you, or them. It just was. It's complicated, sort of, but it's entirely about me. And I'm sorry, for the way I turned on you about it."
Pansy nodded, relief washing over her as she processed his words, which didn't really answer a whole lot, but gave Pansy enough alleviation from her worry. She watched him for a few seconds more; his face had dropped downwards, his eyes looking at the desk in front of them, but Pansy knew he was really miles away, a look upon him she'd only seen properly once, when the wand of Alecto Carrow was pointed towards him.
"Tell me," she said before she gave herself the opportunity to wonder if it was a good idea to pry so hard. "If...if you want to, I mean."
Neville breathed deeply through his nose, not acknowledging her words straight away. She saw his eyes shut tightly, as an expression of pain on his face heightened. "It's okay," Pansy whispered, horrified at the effect that whatever was causing him such emotional turmoil was doing to him. "You don't have to-" she stopped as he raised his head, blue eyes meeting green. Pansy continued, "You can tell me if you want, or you can tell me nothing if that's easier. But you can trust me, Neville."
Neville jerked at her words, his name had sounded foreign, coming from her mouth, even to Pansy herself. She wasn't entirely sure she'd ever said his first name aloud before, and from the way Neville's eyebrow raised slightly, neither was he.
"I know. I don't know how I know, but for some bonkers reason I do trust you," he said.
Pansy smiled softly at his use of the word bonkers, such a small thing highlighting just how different they were, as Pansy's own choice of descriptor of the same thing would have probably contained more than a few expletives. "I...trust you too," she replied quietly. "It is totally... bonkers," she finished, shooting him a sly smile, which earned her a small laugh from the Gryffindor.
"Swearing suits you much more, you know," he said with another quick chuckle.
"Thank fuck," Pansy answered, joining his laugh.
Neville watched her, his hands clasped together tightly the entire time he'd been sitting, separated. His left arm, the closest to her, reached forward and brushed a single, stray dark hair away from her eye. The slight movement caused Pansy to involuntarily shudder slightly, knowing that, in that moment, him touching her was all she wanted. She turned her head towards him, not caring that they were in the library and could be come across at any given moment, by any given person.
In that moment, it was no longer about wanting him.
It was about needing him.
He brought his hand down again, much to Pansy's disappointment. She watched, as he swallowed, his eyes never leaving hers as he spoke, "Torture is not an easy thing for me to deal with. I was raised by my grandmother because...my parents live in St. Mungo's. They were tortured...really badly, by Bellatrix Lestrange, her husband, and his brother…"
...and his brother.
Pansy felt a sick heat somewhere in the pit of her stomach. Rodolphus Lestrange had only one brother.
"They endured so many Cruciatus Curses that….they went insane," Neville finished.
Pansy listened in silence, horrified. If she hadn't already changed her allegiance entirely, watching Neville confess the most painful part of his life, would have been the moment she defected.
"I never...never knew," Pansy answered, meekly. She felt a strong urge to do something, anything to comfort him.
Fuck them all.
With even less thought than before about the fact they were not in any sort of privacy, Pansy leaned towards Neville, snaking her arms around his neck, feeling confident enough she could hex anyone who happened to come across them at that moment into oblivion. She felt him hesitate for a fraction of a second before he allowed himself to be pulled into her fully, his hands grabbing fistfuls of her hair as she pressed her face into his shoulder.
Pansy didn't know how long they stayed like that, holding each other, each leaning into the other, as though they were the only two people left on Earth, but she did know that for the first time in her life, this was where she was meant to be. She considered his words again, and the unspoken part where she just knew she was one of only few people to know his deepest secret, a fact which saddened and humbled her all at once. She breathed deeply, inhaling him.
He smelled of earth...and autumn days.
"It's probably not even going to be in any book here!" A vaguely familiar voice spoke into the quiet of the library.
Shit! It had been well and good for Pansy to definitely think that she cared not about them getting caught, it was quite another thing to actively allow herself to remain in a compromising position with Neville whilst they were made aware of an impending intrusion, something he seemed to agree on as they broke apart simultaneously.
A pair of sixth-year Ravenclaws came into view, both stopping abruptly at the obscure sight of Pansy Parkinson and Neville Longbottom sitting together. Pansy began to panic, feeling entirely caught off guard.. She scowled at the two boys, whilst darting her eyes at Neville, who was facing away from the approaching pair, facing Pansy with a smile upon his face. Pansy frowned as Neville shot her a quick wink, before slamming a clenched fist upon the desk and beginning a tangent that Daphne would have been proud of, his voice raised and his arms flying dramatically as he got up from his seat and began to stomp about.
"You are one of the worst partners I've ever been given, do you know that? I've done every bit of work for Herbology while you've sat there brushing your bloody hair! Which doesn't look any better, by the way, Parkinson!"
Pansy's eyes widened and her jaw dropped, Neville was still facing her, away from the two Ravenclaws, his eyebrows were raised and his top teeth were biting his lower lip to stop himself from laughing. She looked over his shoulder, the two boys looked altogether less shocked but had busied themselves closeby, clearly interested in Pansy's response.
Well, it had better be believable...
The slap echoed through the library and Pansy saw the Ravenclaws raise their eyes, look at each other quickly and hot foot it from the room.
"Hey!" Neville hissed. "You didn't have to hit me!"
"I'll make it up to you later, maybe."
"Looking forward to it," Neville replied, with an uncharacteristic smirk.
Pansy narrowed her eyes. "Don't be talking shit about my hair, Longbottom."
"Your hair is lovely."
"Much better."
Neville looked over his shoulder, his eyes darting in every direction before relaxing, resting back upon Pansy. "I think they're gone."
"I think you're right."
Somehow, they were now both standing though Pansy wasn't entirely sure she remembered standing up. Neville took a step towards her just as Pansy bit her bottom lip, her heart suddenly beating fast as a strong, captivating sense of deja vu took over her. Neville emulated the exact way he moved towards her in the greenhouse earlier. Pansy swallowed, taking a step towards him also. He was so close to her now, she could, once again, make out the individual hairs of his stubble, until…
A set of footsteps, accompanied by a loud, distinctly Irish, "You here, Nev?"
Are you fucking kidding me?! She heard Neville groan audibly as Seamus Finnigan came into view from behind them. Neville took a large step away from Pansy, though, she noted, he looked particularly reluctant about doing so.
"Ah, Neville, thought I'd come rescue you!"
"Right, great. Thanks, Seamus," Neville mumbled. Pansy was amused to see his teeth were gritted. "We'll finish it another time, then?"
Pansy shot him a look which she knew was full of disdain and saw the amused ghost of a smile briefly cross Neville's mouth. "I can hardly contain myself, Longbottom." Before she strode away, making sure to bump her shoulder hard against Finnigan as she walked past.
Stupid. Irish. Pillock!