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Part Two | Pain & Fire
Twenty-Four. A Very Different Kettle of Squid
In the weeks that followed their first meeting in Pansy and Draco's living room, Neville and Theo had struck up a rather odd, but firm, friendship. Having another person close to Pansy that he could trust seemed to have a positive effect on Neville, and whilst he was still suffering torture, and now the Carrows had began regular interrogations, his demeanor had somewhat relaxed even in his darkest moments under the Unforgivable Curse that Alecto flung at him.
Theo himself, had nothing but admiration for the boy he had, at one point, basically bullied.
"Mate, you are hardcore," Theo had stated one day as he and Neville sat on the couch in the head quarters. Winky was busying herself rubbing a salve along the shoulder of a shirtless Neville, who, this week, had endured not just his usual Cruciatus, but had been forced to fight his way away from some kind dagger that Alecto had thrust into the flesh of the Gryffindor's upper arm during a particularly strenuous lesson.
"Cheers," Neville replied through gritted teeth.
"She really hates you, doesn't she." It was phrased as such, yet Pansy knew it wasn't a question. Her mouth was dry as she stood, watching her House Elf attend to her boyfriend's latest wound, a sickening feeling of dread was beginning to mount in her chest as she watched Neville's grimace.
Where would we go?
Truth be told, Pansy hadn't taken his words seriously at the time. The whole notion of leaving Hogwarts seeming absolutely absurd, but her growing anxiety that came from the lack of reply from Rabastan, and the sickening worry that next time it may not be Neville's shoulder that Alecto felt like stabbing, was forcing her mind to wander to the possibility.
But… where could we go?
"I'm not her favourite person, no," Neville said, answering Theo's statement; his words were laced with a hiss of pain, his face had scrunched itself up as Winky finished.
"It should heal well, Mr Neville," the elf piped up. She patted Neville's arm affectionately before beginning to gather up the first aid supplies she had used. Pansy wasn't entirely sure when exactly Winky had began to refer to Neville as anything other than Miss Pansy's mate, but the change had been a welcome one.
"Thank you, Winky," Neville said as he tentatively tested his shoulder joint, flexing his arm at a number of different angles.
Pansy had rushed to fill the empty space that the elf had occupied, still remaining uncharacteristically silent. Neville's eyes met hers, his left arm - his injured arm - began to rise, presumably to rest on Pansy's own shoulders, but with a jolt and a gasp of pain, he settled on placing his hand protectively atop Pansy's right leg, fingertips tracing small nondescript patterns just above her knee.
The movements had an instant calming effect on Pansy, something that made her feel a sense of selfishness. I should be the one comforting him. Biting her lip, Pansy swallowed, before turning her head to face Neville. He in turn, looked back at her,, his blue eyes searching hers intently.
"How...how does it feel?" Pansy asked. Ugh, Pansy. You're crap.
"Bit better," Neville replied, "you okay?"
You were stabbed, of course I'm not okay! "I suppose."
Neville frowned, but did not pursue the matter further, and Pansy was almost glad when Winky interrupted their conversation, "Miss Pansy, with your permission, I believe it will be better if Mr Neville stays here tonight. This balm is elf-made, and the healing charm contained within it works better if an elf administers it. Winky can check on Mr Neville easier this way, Miss, and Winky can have Dobby inform Mr Neville's friends he is safe and being tended to."
Pansy's heart began to hammer fast at Winky's words. Neville... Stay here?
Neville's fingers wrapped themselves around the bottom of Pansy's thigh, before he turned back to her. She had expected him to politely decline, say it was too suspicious, that it was too dangerous, what she hadn't banked on, was him directing his answer onto her.
"Would that be okay?"
Neville… staying here...in my bed.
"Yeah, of course," Pansy heard her own voice answer him back.
The afternoon had rolled into evening and before long Pansy, Neville,Theo and Draco had been joined by Millicent, Daphne and Blaise. Daphne had, of course, known about all the developments between Pansy and Neville and had showed a vibrant enthusiasm of her approval of the couple, and had wasted no time in talking to Neville at great length, feeling it was her role as Pansy's best friend, to befriend her current suitor.
Blaise had maintained a quiet, yet dignified stance on the newest addition to their friendship group. He did not speak to Neville much, but then, Pansy had mused, Blaise didn't tend to speak to anyone very much. Even throughout their younger school years, the mysterious Zabini boy had often kept to himself, immersing his interests in books and studies. In fact, it was only when Daphne starting showering him with more attention, originally at the beginning of sixth year, which had the added complication that Daphne had indeed been sleeping with Theo at the time, did Blaise really begin to open himself up to them.
It was Millicent, as surprising and saddening as it was to her, considering they'd been staunch friends for six years, that worried Pansy. After Theo had confessed his fears of Millicent's conflictions, Pansy had, just as she'd said she would, spoke to her friend. She tried three times, none of which went particularly well.
The first had involved Pansy charming away Millicent's tears, and the second had involved the exact opposite and Millicent pleading with Pansy not to press that matter further.
Unfortunately, having reached no conclusion, Pansy felt no option but to do exactly that.
"Just spit it out Pansy," Millicent snapped, and Pansy felt herself actually recoil a touch at the tone of Millicent's voice.
"I just wanted to know...that you're okay," Pansy answered quietly. Truth be told, her initial instinct after overcoming the shock at how Millicent had spoke to her was to snap right back and inform Millicent that she needn't be a cow. However, she knew that tact, right now at least, was needed.
Millicent had looked her straight in the eyes as she replied. "You can't honestly believe you'll survive this if you don't join him."
She didn't wait to hear Pansy's response, simply opting to turn on the ball of her foot and storm away from the head girl.
She opted not to try for a fourth time, throwing a swift sorry and sympathetic glance at Theo, who had shrugged and offered Pansy a grateful smile.
As they sat in Pansy and Draco's living room, Pansy couldn't help but avoid Millicent's eyes. She had, at least, offered Neville the smallest hint of a smile, and didn't seem obviously opposed to his presence, which is something, Pansy thought to herself.
"Draco, please tell me that you, of all people, have more firewhisky than this," Daphne was saying. She held an almost empty bottle in her left hand and an accusing expression upon her face.
Draco scoffed, "Of course not, what do you take me for, Greengrass?"
"Our resident alcoholic?" Daphne answered brightly, which elicited her a snort of laughter from everyone present except Pansy, who hadn't found Draco's drinking habits amusing in any way for weeks.
"Check the kitchen," Draco said, slinging his left leg over the arm of his chair, casually, as he leaned back into the soft fabric.
Blaise sat similarly, in an identical chair to Draco's. They had magically duplicated it, providing Blaise and Daphne, who rarely took up two separate seats in any setting, could occupy.
Theo and Millicent were sitting together at one end of the sofa, the former fiddling with a packet of Muggle cigarettes. The space next to him was filled with Neville's right leg and Pansy's feet; the rest of Neville was sharing the end space with the rest of Pansy, who was taking up less space than she usually would, on account of her having positioned herself sideways, her legs cast over the rest of the lap she was currently sitting in.
It still felt strange to be this comfortable with Neville, especially amongst the rest of her friends. Although Pansy wasn't sure if it was the proximity that felt so obscure, or the very fact that the rest of the group had been so accepting of her relationship with someone they had all, at one point or another, taunted. Another example, Pansy realised, of how much Neville had grown, not just physically - although his impressive height definitely made him seem more imposing - but mentally as well.
A surge of pride rose through Pansy at her analysis of him, and she leant into him further, pressing her side into his torso and resting the side of her face on his firm chest. His right hand had found its way to the place just above her knee that he had run his fingertips over earlier, and began the action once more. The relaxing rhythm of this movement, combined with the way she could just feel his heartbeat against her cheek, filled Pansy with a nervous excitement for whatever awaited the pair later in the evening. When he stays...in my bed.
"One for you, and you, and -" Daphne's voice rang out loud, wrenching Pansy from her momentary contemplation. She looked up, hearing Neville thank Daphne for the glass that was now firmly in his grasp. "Oh Pans, look at you, you're both so-"
"-Daphne, you better not be about to say what I think you're about to say-"
"-cute!" Daphne finished, triumphantly, ignoring Pansy's interruption.
"Give me my drink," Pansy snapped, wishing furiously that she was immune to the red hue that had taken over her cheeks at her best friend's words, only made worse by the outpour of laughter that had erupted from both Theo and Draco at her words. Even the corner of Blaise's mouth had lifted and Millicent was openly giggling, and, she realised after a quick glance, that even Neville's face was covered with a wide, annoying grin. I'm surrounded by idiots.
The sweet smile that Daphne presented her with annoyed Pansy more, and so she accepted her glass of whisky with a snatch and a glare, that only seemed to make Daphne look more chipper.
"So, Neville," Daphne began, which forced some of Pansy's annoyance to ebb away. The fact that Daphne had began to refer to Neville by his first name was something Pansy found rather amusing, considering she herself still had a hard time referring to him as anything other than Longbottom sometimes. "Have we managed to change your opinion of Slytherins?"
"Definitely," Neville answered, his voice lighthearted. Pansy felt his other hand, the one that stretched around her back, gently touch the nape of her neck.
"Good," Daphne concluded, giggling as she and Neville clinked their glasses together. She walked around the coffee table, delivering Draco and Blaise their drinks and deposited herself on Blaise's lap, where she curled herself up, reminding Pansy of the way a cat circles gracefully before lying down. Daphne's sparkling blue eyes found Pansy's stare and she shot her friend a bright smile, which Pansy returned with a small upturning of the corners of her mouth. She leaned into Neville again, noticing the way her stomach seemed to flip flop at the soft kiss he planted on her forehead.
The evening passed quickly and pleasantly. The Christmas holidays were approaching rapidly and Draco, Daphne, Millicent Blaise and Theo would all be returning home for the break. Pansy, of course, had to stay at Hogwarts to avoid Rabastan. Neville was remaining, he informed them, as his family were now in hiding and there was no feasible way for them to get a message to him to reveal their whereabouts.
"Well, Pans, at least you'll have some," Theo began, nudging Pansy's foot playfully with his elbow, "good company, eh?" he finished with an over exaggerated wink before beginning to talk animatedly, whilst Millicent excused herself to visit the bathroom, over his plan to surprise her on the train ride back to London.
"I'm thinking chocolate-covered fruit, a private compartment, and a personalised," Theo pointed both his thumbs backwards, gesturing to himself, "butler service."
"Theo, that is crap," Draco informed his friend. You aren't wrong there, Pansy mused to herself in amusement.
"Wait, you haven't heard the best part… it's a naked butler service," Theo finished triumphantly.
Everyone present had burst out laughing at Theo's words. Blaise and Draco shook their heads whilst Daphne and Pansy stifled giggles behind balled up fists.
Neville patted Theo's shoulder, before saying, between laughs, "I'm sure she'll love that," making Theo grin, triumphantly.
"Longbottom," Draco called out, a humourous snap to his tone, "don't fucking encourage him!"
"Encourage who?" Millicent's voice piped up from the door as the brunette witch walked back towards the couch.
"Noone!" rang the collective answer of six voices, much to, if the raising of her eyebrows were anything to go by, Millicent's suspicion.
Pansy offered Millicent a soft smile and was relieved when it was reciprocated.
Stay with us, Mills.
"Tonight was fun," Neville said, setting down his glass on the coffee table rather shakily, his numerous top ups having clearly had a profound effect on his senses.
Pansy watched the way he seemed to sway as he sat back in his seat. "Yeah, it was," Pansy answered. She stood at the edge of the couch, having just seen their other four friends off at the door. She ran her hands through her hair, and covered the yawn she couldn't help but let out with her palm. Looking downwards, she was somewhat surprised to see that Neville was watching her. Oh, you look cute with drunk eyes.
"Right, I'm going to bed," Draco said, arising from his chair, his tolerance for the firewhisky was the highest out of the friends, and he therefore remained the closest to sober. "Remember," he added, pointing to Pansy and Neville in turn, "silencing charm, please."
Neville let out a bark of a laugh, whilst Pansy narrowed her eyes at Draco, watching him walk through the rear door.
"Come here," Neville said, and Pansy realised while she was watching Draco leave, Neville must have began to watch her again.
Biting her bottom lip and feigning and intense look of worry, she asked coyly, "Are you sure your shoulder doesn't need to rest?"
"It'll survive," he replied, and Pansy could feel the desire in his eyes as they drifted up and down her body.
She looked down at him, his hand reaching towards hers and she automatically took it, allowing herself to be pulled downwards, so that she was on top of him once more, her legs again splayed over his: only this time…
We're alone.
Pansy had never considered the prospect of feeling any sense of nervousness when it came to acts of intimacy, she had only ever been with Draco, but that had ended up transcending years of her life, and had involved several bouts of experimentation, until both felt as sexually experienced as they needed to be.
Now, however, she wasn't with Draco, she was with Neville. And Neville, was a very different kettle of squid.
Never before had Pansy felt such a need to impress, she didn't know why, exactly, but she did know that Neville was infatuated with her - just as she was with him - even though she was aware, logically speaking, that he, as a hot-blooded male if nothing else, would enjoy any night they shared together immensely and yet still she felt an intense pressure to impress him.
It was an altogether new feeling. Pansy Parkinson, as a rule, did not go out of her way to impress anyone.
Choosing, from her very first year at Hogwarts, that if Pansy had to put up with being treated like a second class citizen in what is supposed to be the safety of her home, at school, everyone would know that here, she was the one who was first class. And so, Pansy conducted herself as such in every aspect of her life at Hogwarts, navigating all the different pieces of her world, and self, with such precise handling that, by third year, Pansy Parkinson was already an expert manipulator, pulling the strings of her life so effortlessly, that control, in one way or another, was second nature.
Until now, Pansy realised with a gulp, it was all for nothing. With him, I can barely control myself, let alone anyone else.
Pansy felt Neville's firm hand caress the side of her neck for a small second before he began to kiss her. It was unlike any way they had kissed previously when the kiss itself was the end game. Never before had there been the promise of more. This time, Pansy realised in a shiver of nervous excitement, the kiss is only the beginning.
The prospect of anything sexual, Pansy was starting to somehow realise despite the prominent haze that was taking over her brain as Neville deepened their kiss, was entirely different when it involved the feelings she had for him.
His hand had moved upwards and Pansy felt his fingers wind themselves gently around strands of her hair, tantalisingly rubbing her scalp as his tongue simultaneously massaged her own.
As though her body was acting entirely of its own volition, Pansy found herself sitting up, moving her leg back slightly and over. She swivelled her body around so she faced Neville straight on, finally planting her leg next to Neville's side, so the Gryffindor was straddled beneath her. Right...where I want you.
Neville let out a low groan as his hands left her head, and began to make their way down Pansy's back. He was gentle at first, but his touch grew steadily firmer as Pansy began to rhythmically shift her hips back and forth, an alcohol-induced confidence overshadowing her nervous disposition as the friction caused by the folded crease in the crotch of Neville's trousers - which was accompanied by a certain something that Pansy was confident was not caused by any fabric creasing - was providing her with a new and welcome pounding of desire.
Drawing back from him, Pansy realised she was panting, and considering Neville's ever-wandering hands were now situated on the tops of her thighs, it didn't take much logic to dictate what direction they were heading towards.
Having no desire to continue the scenario on the couch, Pansy looked down at him. "Come to bed?" she asked, a sly smile tugged at the sides of her mouth as she stood up, not waiting for the response she already knew the answer to, and held her hand out to Neville.
He accepted her outstretched hand with a smile of his own, and stood leaning down to plant a brief, lingering kiss upon Pansy's lips. He allowed her to lead him, his hand still grasped within hers, through the rear door, down the adjacent corridor, up the stairs and eventually, to the private confines of her bedroom.