Hey guys this is just a mini chapter I came up with when I got the chance to use the hospital computer. It's not well edited and I don't know if the layout turned out right because I haven't posted from one of these computers before but I hope you enjoy. I'll try to update more soon, this chapter is more of a look into Nic and Conrad's thoughts and where they are at now, if you're looking for drama you'll enjoy the next chapter much more just bare with me thanks.
Nic awoke early the next day to the smell of freshly cooked breakfast, Conrad knocked gently on the door before walking in and handing her a full plate. "You should be resting" Nic spoke softly but firmly to him, as if he were one of her patients.
"I don't need to rest, I've been cleared remember?" he knew she did and didn't really need to remind her but he did anyway to give her the assurance that he was fine and that she didn't need to worry. It was his turn to worry about her now. She knew he was right so she just sighed softly and rolled her eyes in response which just mae him smile. "You need to be focusing on you right now. Besides it's not like I'm going out to run marathons, I made breakfast I'm sure that's not going to kill me"
Nic shut her eyes when he said that, she knew he was right but she still had thoughts of him back in that hospital room unresponsive and hardly even alive. She knew she should be focused on herself but how could she be when all she could think of was how it had all been her fault. She had held off on telling him about the baby, she had started a fight with him and she didn't respond quickly enough when he was dying on that road. It seemed Conrad could guess what she had been thinking because he interrupted her thoughts. "Sometimes things just happen Nic, everything we've been through doesn't have one simple answer, I know that blaming yourself helps you to make sense of the situation but it's not going to help things"
"I know, I know it's just I can't shake this feeling.. like I could have stopped all this from happening if I was just honest with you"
"Well if we're playing the blame game here technically it's my fault" he did feel a surge of guilt when he thought of Nic blaming herself for all this drama when he was the one who turned a simple conversation into a fight, he was the one who made her feel like she couldn't be honest with him, he was the one who put her in a terrible position where she felt so alone. He tried to shake the thought, he couldn't preach to Nic about moving on if he couldn't do it himself. "It doesn't matter now, we just need to focus on getting back to normal"
"How are we meant to do that? We're going to have a baby to take ca of in just a few weeks and we aren't even prepared" she put her plate down on the bedside table now feeling too unwell to even think about food. "What if we can't do it? she asked, her voice now trembling and tears began to fill her eyes. He gently took her hand in his, he wasn't sure how to comfort her because in this moment he too was scared.
"We'll be okay. You're gonna be a great parent, you shouldn't doubt yourself" he truly meant that, he had total faith in her. It was his ability to be a father that he really called into question. He didn't exactly grow up with a good example of what a good father should be. Although he wouldn't admit it, the prospect of not being enough for this baby terrified him and it was a thought he couldn't seem to shake.