For those of you who've been reading since the beginning, I'm sorry I it took so long, and thank you for your patience. For those of you who weren't following my profile, I've completed this story. I'll be uploading it more or less as fast as I can get it edited and then get it formatted here. There are three more chapters after this one. There'll be a longer retrospective after chapter 9.
Fate/stay night and Fate/zero are the property of TYPE-MOON. This story is a work of fanfiction, and the author makes no claim to these properties. Some lines of dialogue have been excerpted from the above works in their entirety in this fanfiction. They are from the translations by mirror-moon and Baka-Tsuki, respectively. Thanks to Da-Guru and my brother for their help editing.
Continuation of the Dream
Part Two: Pursuing the Dream
II
Arturia's consciousness returns slowly, and as she becomes aware of her surroundings she fights the return to wakefulness. The bed she is sprawled in is large and soft, the blankets that cover her are warm, and the pillow under her head is soft and fluffy. She is aware that once she wakes up she will have to leave this comfort behind, so she burrows deeper into her bedding and tries to fall back asleep. She is just beginning to hope that she might succeed when there is a loud bang from nearby. With a groan, she rolls over and opens her sleep-gummed eyes.
Through the thin curtains covering the window, the rising sun illuminates the room with a soft glow. Arturia glances around, blinking blearily. 'Ah, that is correct. I am in a hotel in England, in the era of Shirou and Irisviel.' It feels like a dream to her. She sits up slowly, rubbing her eyes, but the sense of unreality remains. She shakes her head. 'No, certainly this is not a dream. I remember the events of the past day too clearly.' She stares at the window, listening to the sounds of automobiles outside.
'It is late.' That does not surprise her. Although she retreated to her room early the previous night, it was still many hours before she fell asleep. Scowling, she recalls her tears the previous night. 'That was behavior unbecoming of a knight.' With a sigh, she flops backwards, sinking into the soft mattress again. 'This is very comfortable,' she thinks, closing her eyes. 'I believe I could sleep more, if I wished to.'
Her eyes snap open again as the loud banging noise repeats itself. Now more alert, she can identify it as coming from the direction of the hallway. Curious, she rolls out of bed and pads across the thick carpeting toward the door. As she approaches it, she can see it shake as someone apparently bangs on it from outside. However, the noise does not sound like someone knocking, but more like someone hitting the door as hard as they can. Arturia laughs quietly to herself and reaches out to unlatch the door.
"Good morning, Tai-chan," she says as she pulls it open. The Japanese girl is standing just outside her room, on one leg, staring at her with wide eyes.
"How did you know it was me?" she asks, amazed, as she lowers her foot to the ground.
"Were you kicking the door to my room?" Arturia asks, rubbing the bridge of her nose.
"Well, yeah." The girl admits matter-of-factly. "You weren't answering when I knocked, so I thought you might still be sleeping." She looks at Arturia suspiciously. "You weren't sleeping, were you? It's almost nine!"
"You did not wake me," Arturia confirms, "but you did draw me out of bed."
"Oh." Tai is nonplussed. "What were you doing in bed if you were already awake?" She shakes her head. "Never mind that," she continues without giving Arturia a chance to respond. "Now that you're up, we can go have breakfast!"
Arturia's stomach eagerly responds to the thought of breakfast. "Breakfast would be good," she agrees, "but I did just awaken. Please give me a few minutes to wash up. I have not even dressed yet. I will meet you downstairs."
"Okay," Tai chirps, "but don't take to long. I'm hungry!"
"I will do my best," Arturia assures her, and lets the door swing closed. She latches it again and shuffles back into the main room, stretching. 'This stiffness must be due to sleeping on such a soft mattress. It was indeed comfortable, but my body is unaccustomed to it.' She retrieves the clothes Tai lent her the night before and heads for the bathroom, locking the door behind her despite being alone in the suite, an unbroken habit from years of hiding her true sex.
Arturia hangs her clean clothes on the hooks on the inside of the door. 'I will have to ask Tai's grandfather what to do with my laundry,' she thinks as she removes the souvenir shirt she wore to bed. 'I believe most hotels offer a laundry service, but I doubt we will be staying long enough for that if we are traveling to another town today.'
'I definitely missed these conveniences,' she thinks as she relieves herself. 'The facilities developed in the modern era are much more comfortable, and much more sanitary. I could not possibly complain about the accessible privacy, either.' After washing her hands, she splashes cold water on her face, washing away the last of her sleepiness along with the dried tear tracks she sees in the mirror. 'I must have wept in my sleep. That is not surprising, but it is unfortunate.' She had hoped that after crying herself into exhaustion in the shower the previous night, her tears for her friends would also have been exhausted.
'I still miss them, but it does not hurt as much to recall them as it did,' she thinks as she towels her face vigorously. 'And perhaps, if I am lucky...' Now that she has obtained some level of security, she can permit herself to hope. 'Perhaps, maybe... I may see Shirou again.' She could no longer prevent herself from thinking about it, anyway. It is too tempting a possibility for her to completely ignore it. She catches a glimpse of her reflection in the bathroom mirror as she turns to retrieve her clothes. 'I am not some lovestruck girl,' she assures herself. 'I am definitely not pining after him.'
Satisfied with her verdict, Arturia turns her attention to dressing. The jeans she borrowed are tighter than she is accustomed to wearing, and it takes her some effort to pull them on. However, that is a minor annoyance compared to the shirt her new friend convinced her to wear. It is, fortunately, not pink, but the bright light over the mirror reveals it to be far more garish than it looked in the soft light of the bedroom the night before. What she had taken for a rich pattern of gold and blue is revealed to be an eye-searing combination of orange and purple. 'She did this in purpose,' she thinks crossly. 'Chasing me about with that pink dress was clearly a distraction. Although I might have preferred it to this...'
'I hope I do not regret agreeing to accompany her for a few days,' she thinks when she hears renewed banging on the door to her room. 'I would not have suspected that she could be so energetic in the morning after running about yesterday. This may be more exhausting than I anticipated.' Resigning herself to her fate, she ties her hair back into the ponytail she has become accustomed to as she goes to answer the door.
She pauses with her hand on the doorknob, thinking of Avalon resting across the foot of her bed. 'If necessary, I will bring it with me. I can maintain it in its barrier form for a while, at least. Or I will carry it openly if that is the only option. I will not have it stolen again. However, breakfast should not be far, and I would prefer to conserve my prana.' Another loud knock reminds her that there is an impatient, hungry teenager on the other side of the door, and her hand tightens on the doorknob. 'Perhaps she can provide with me a solution.'
"I thought you agreed to meet me downstairs," Arturia says, exasperated, as she pulls open to door to face Tai.
"I did, but then I got downstairs and realized you might not know where the dining room was, so I came back," she explains.
"I see. That was very thoughtful," Arturia smiles. "Thank you."
"Besides, if I came back up here I'd know when you left your room, which means less waiting," Tai continues unabashedly. "Now can we go eat? I'm hungry!"
Arturia holds her ground. "Is this room secure?"
"If you lock the door, only the employees have the key, but cleaning doesn't usually start until later, anyway," Tai answers. "What's with the serious look? Do you have something really valuable in there?"
Arturia nods slowly. "I do not know what others would value it as, but it is my most important possession, and therefore priceless to me."
"Well, if you're worried, make sure you lock the door, and hang that sign on doorknob. You know, the one hanging on the inside handle?" She pushes the door to Arturia's room open slightly and gropes around for a moment before waving a cardboard placard triumphantly. "It's a "don't enter" sign. It lets the cleaners know not to go into the room." She hangs it over the doorknob and stares pointedly at Arturia. "Now lock up and let's go eat!"
Arturia fumbles through her pockets for the key. "Should we not inform your grandfather that we are going for breakfast?" she asks, forcing herself to be concerned about less serious matters. She locks the door and tests the knob, nodding with satisfaction when it does not turn. "I would not want to worry him with our absence."
In response, Tai tugs Arturia's arm, pulling her in the direction of the stairs. "He's waiting for us downstairs. At least, he'd better be. If he started eating without me," she mutters, "I'll kill him!"
"I am certain he has waited. Your grandfather does not seem so unmannerly as to eat without regard for the appetites of others," Arturia reassures her seriously. "It would be a grievous insult to begin the meal without all participants present, and I could not misjudge someone so badly with regard to their respect for food."
They start down the stairs in silence.
"Tai-chan," Arturia says slowly, "I do not wish to believe it of him, but is it possible your grandfather would eat our breakfast if we were late?"
"He wouldn't do that," Tai waves off her concerns, and they continue walking in silence. Then-
"Actually, he might."
Arturia freezes in her tracks as a chill runs down her spine. She seizes her companion's hand and looks her in the eye. "Then we must hurry," she says in a voice like steel. Without regard for the footing, she rushes down the stairs, pulling the girl behind her. As she reaches the bottom of one flight, she uses her free hand to grasp the railing, swinging around the bend to preserve her momentum.
Unfortunately, Tai is not so agile. As Arturia attempts to pull her around the end of the handrail, her foot catches and she stumbles down the last step with a startled wail. One of her flailing arms catches Arturia, and the two of them crash into the wall of the stairwell.
"Owww," Tai moans, rubbing her head. Immediately, Arturia kneels at her side.
"Are you alright?" she asks quickly.
"I'm fine, I'm fine. I've had worse, anyway," Tai mutters as she sits up.
Arturia presses a hand to her heart. "It relieves me to hear you say that." She sits back on her heels. "If you are well, we should proceed to breakfast with all possible haste."
Despite Arturia's expectations, Tai just stares at her for a moment. Then, her body begins to shake. "Haha, ahahahahahaha!" she laughs suddenly, pointing at Arturia. "You should have seen the look on your face, Arturia-chan. It was definitely worth the bump on the head to see that."
Arturia draws back, offended. "I do not see what is amusing about this situation."
"I was teasing you, of course," she explains with a wide grin. "Gramps couldn't eat our breakfast even if he wanted to. Breakfast at this hotel is a buffet."
"A... buffet?" She knows what the word means, but it is not something she has ever had the opportunity to experience. "All you can eat?" He mouth waters at the thought.
"Yeah," Tai confirms, "although it's just normal English breakfast stuff. Nothing special."
"No, that is incorrect. An all-you-can-eat buffet is certainly something special," Arturia corrects her, eyes sparkling. "This is a rare and valuable opportunity."
"Ah... is it really?" Tai asks uncertainly.
"Yes." Arturia shakes her head, dispelling her good humor. "But that is beside the point. It is not funny at all to joke about the loss of a meal."
"Ehhhh? It was very funny!" Tai disagrees bluntly. "You reacted like it was a matter of life and death!"
Arturia looks away. 'I had forgotten how lucky the people of this era are. It my time, a meal was for many a matter of life and death. It was not unusual to see a starving child or family if one traveled any distance,' she thinks sadly. 'Still, I cannot be displeased by this change.'
"Arturia-chan?" Her friend's voice is concerned. "What's wrong?"
"It is nothing." Arturia stands up and brushes off her knees. "Let us go to breakfast." She offers a hand to the girl sitting on the floor.
"If you say so, I'll believe you for now..." Tai agrees skeptically as she takes Arturia's hand, allowing Arturia to help her to her feet, "but only because Gramps will really get mad if we're any later. Just because he won't take away our breakfasts doesn't mean he can't scold us. Well, me. I don't think he'd scold you."
"We should hurry, then," Arturia says, starting down the stairs. "I would not wish to be responsible for you getting scolded by your grandfather."
"Don't worry about it." Tai rubs her head. "I get scolded a lot anyway," she admits shamefacedly. As they reach the bottom of the stairs, she turns toward a doorway to the side of the lobby. "Come on, the dining room is over here."
Tai stops just inside the door to the dining room and scans the room, forcing Arturia to stop abruptly as well to avoid walking into her. "Aha!" she exclaims as she locates her grandfather. The old man is sitting at a booth against the far wall by a window, reading a newspaper. As Arturia watches, he takes a sip from the cup in front of him, and turns the page.
"Hey, hey, come on, Arturia-chan!" Tai tugs at her arm. "Let's go let Gramps know we're here, then we'll go get something to eat."
Arturia nods her assent, and the two of them cross the dining room. As they approach, Tai's grandfather lowers his paper and raises an eyebrow at them.
"I was beginning to worry that you two had gotten lost on the way down," he says dryly. "Or that you had decided to skip breakfast in your eagerness to go play."
"Gramps!" Tai protests. "I would never!"
"I agree," Arturia adds firmly. "Skipping breakfast is absolutely out of the question. I apologize for the delay, but it seem that I overslept." She bows slightly to emphasize her apology.
"It's partially my fault, too..." The girl says reluctantly. "Anyway, we're going to go hit the buffet, Gramps."
The man downs the last of the beverage Arturia can now identify by smell as coffee. "Well, I'd better go, too, if I want to get anything before it's all gone."
It takes a moment for the implications of his statement to become clear to the two girls. "I-I protest, sir!" Arturia stammers, blushing. "I know I have a larger than average appetite, but it is unfair to say that it is so large!"
"Graaammmmps," his real granddaughter whines, "I don't eat that much."
He laughs. "Maybe neither of you alone, but two growing young women put together?" He waves toward the array of food. "Go on, then. Don't let me keep you from your breakfast any longer. Oh, and Arturia-chan?" he says as she turns to leave, "Call me "Grandfather," remember?"
"Yes... Grandfather." Arturia bows slightly in his direction, then hurries after his real granddaughter.
~~~CotD~~~
Arturia sets her silverware down and sits back with a contented sigh. "That was satisfactory. I have no complaints."
"I should hope not," her temporary grandfather laughs. "The hotel, on the other hand..." He inclines his head toward the buffet attendants, who have been glaring at their table ever since Arturia and Taiga went back for a sixth helping.
"They advertised an open buffet," Arturia responds primly. "If they did not wish us to take as much as we desired, they should have indicated the limit in advance. They did not, so I likewise did not restrain myself."
"And now they are restraining themselves," he mutters, eying the twitching staff. "Just as well for us it's about time to check out." He finishes his coffee and stands up. "Come along, ladies. Let's go pack up before they decide you're going to eat the furniture and kick us out."
Arturia gulps down the remains of her tea with a grimace. When she had reached the urns at the end of the buffet table, Tai had indicated that one of them contained tea. Spurred by fond memories of breakfast at the Emiya residence, she had opted for that beverage. To her displeasure, the tea served here was over-brewed, black, and bitter. The only compensation she had for the terrible taste was seeing her friend snort milk out of her nose when she first tried the tea.
Setting the empty cup back on the table, beside the stack of plates, she follows her friend and her benefactor out of the dining room. They walk up the stairs in relative silence. Tai starts to complain about her stomach aching from eating too much, but an arched eyebrow from her grandfather silences her. When they reach the hallway, she collapses dramatically into an armchair in a nook set off the hallways.
"I can't walk another step," she proclaims. "My stomach will explode."
"Then I must insist you stay here and rest," her grandfather smiles. "I don't want to have to pay for the cleaning bill if you explode all over our room. I have a few things to discuss with Arturia-chan, so I'll help her pack. You can go start stuffing your clothes back into their bags as soon as your stomach can bear it."
"Okay," Tai moans. "I don't think that'll be anytime soon. Ooogh."
Leaving behind the complaining girl, her grandfather and Arturia walk to Arturia's room in silence. The older man raises an eyebrow at the sign on the doorknob.
"'Do not disturb?' Were you afraid of something be stolen? Forgive me for saying so, but I didn't think you had anything of value."
"Is that something a grandfather should say to his granddaughter?" Arturia deflects, drawing a snort from her companion.
"You've got me," he laughs, "but at least you're remembering. That's good. Let us in, and we'll get you packed up for the trip to London, shall we?"
"I do not have many possessions, as you surmised," Arturia says as she unlocks the door. "I do not think you truly believe I require assistance, so I presume you desired an opportunity to speak with me away from your granddaughter. Please give me a moment to straighten the room."
"You're sharp." His words are a compliment, but his tone is guarded. "Although you seem to have forgotten again that you're my granddaughter. Well, take your time packing, then. I'll go get Tai-chan started and come back to talk to you, since it seems I need no pretense." He turns and walks back down the hall.
Arturia pushes open the door to her room just enough to slip inside, and bolts it behind herself. She sits on her bed and regards Avalon.
'It was hard enough to hide Avalon from passing strangers. Keeping it concealed from companions will be difficult, perhaps impossible. Still, for the time being, I believe it would be best not to carry it in the form of a sheath.'
She touches it, and with a thread of prana invokes Avalon's ability as a Noble Phantasm. The sheath responds easily to her will, dissolving into glowing golden motes that surround her like a warm spring breeze before fading from view. She luxuriates in the comforting, familiar feeling for a few moments before assessing the drain on her prana. 'Yes, I can maintain it like this for at least a day,' she thinks confidently. 'It is extraordinarily unlikely that I will have to repel any powerful attacks.'
Still relishing the embrace of Avalon, she collects her clothes, the only other possessions she brought with her, and folds them neatly into a pile. With nothing else to do, she drops back onto her bed to wait.
Fortunately, she does not have to wait long. A firm knock at her door draws her to her feet, and she pads to the door. A check through the peephole reveals her benefactor and she unbolts the door, gesturing him inside.
The old man follows her into her room, and eyes the pile of dirty laundry on the floor with visible distaste. "Is that everything?" he asks. Arturia nods, and he hands her a large plastic trash bag on his way to sit down. At her betrayed expression, he just smiles. "It's not for throwing them out. It's just to keep the dirt contained until we can wash them." He rubs his head, embarrassed. "Sorry for being so blunt."
"No, your decision is correct. My clothes are surely in need of a thorough cleaning." She turns away to hide her smile. 'I had wondered before, but now I can certainly see the family resemblance,' she thinks as she packs her clothes into the bag and ties it shut.
"Right then," the man behind her says. "I don't know how much you know about international travel, but I'll try to keep this simple. In order to board the plane back to Japan, you need a form of identification with your picture on it called a passport. After we get to London, we'll get your picture taken and send it to a friend of mine back home. He'll get the passport made up and express mail it to the hotel. That'll take a few days, but our flight isn't for a few days, anyway. To avoid questions at the airport, your passport will identify you as my granddaughter. Are you okay with that?"
Arturia frowns as she considers his words. 'That does sound very simple.' She can see no flaws with his plan, but she knows she lacks the required knowledge to assess it properly. 'I suppose I will simply have to trust him.'
"That is acceptable," she nods. "That is why you have requested I address you as Grandfather, is it not?"
"It should help deter suspicion at security and customs amongst those who understand Japanese," he points out. "You're not old enough to be traveling alone without drawing attention, I think..." He trails off, looking at her curiously. "How old are you, anyway? That will need to be on the passport. Anyway, people would pay less attention to you if you're traveling with me and Tai-chan. And the less scrutiny, the better."
Arturia starts. "You are planning on forging my passport," she accuses flatly. 'Of course he is.' As soon as she considers it, she realizes immediately that it would be impossible for such a document to be valid. How could he produce for her legal identification as a Japanese citizen when she is not?
"Yes," he admits freely. "Will that be a problem?"
"No." Her reply is immediate. It is illegal, so it is a problem, but it would be a bigger problem for her to remain trapped in Britain. Besides, as he is going out of his way to help her, she cannot think he has bad motives.
"Ah, that's good, then," the old man- 'No, Grandfather,' Arturia corrects herself, 'I must think of him as my grandfather for the time being,' -Grandfather says with visible relief. "Now, how old did you say you were?"
"I did not say," she replies absently, thinking. 'I am not sure how old I am... possibly as old as he is, at least. But I doubt that would be an acceptable response... Physically, my body is... hmm...' Her brows knit as she adds up the years. 'Was I really so young when I drew the sword from the stone? And it feels like only the day after that I received Excalibur and Avalon from Nimue... I still remember clearly Merlin's question about which was more powerful...'
"Arturia-chan?" Her temporary grandfather's voice breaks into her thoughts. "Even if you don't want to tell me, I do need an answer."
"Oh. I was lost in reminiscence. My apologies." Arturia double-checks her math. "Fourteen years."
"So young," he mutters to himself, before smiling at her again. "Oh, and don't worry about keeping all this from Tai-chan. I talked to her about it last night. As much as it pains me to admit it, I don't think she really grasps the complexities, but I think she thinks I'm some sort of secret agent now."
Arturia stares at him.
"I'm not!" he protests.
Arturia's lips twitch. 'When he pouts like that, he resembles his granddaughter even more.'
"It is a reasonable theory," she points out. "It definitely explains how you are able to obtain a falsified illegal document so easily."
Grandfather climbs to his feet, shaking his head. "I won't give up my secrets that easily, Arturia-chan. You are a very mature child, but you are still a child. There are some things it would be best for you not to know." He picks up the bag containing her old clothes and walks to the door of the room. "I'd better go make sure Tai-chan isn't making too much of a mess of things. I'll put this with the rest of our dirty laundry, so don't worry about it." He stops halfway out the door. "If you've got everything out of here, you can come down to our room, or just wait downstairs. I'd like to check out in half an hour, so please don't be late."
The door closes behind him with a thump, and Arturia stares at it mutely.
"I am not a child!" she finally protests to the door, then blushes as she realizes how childish that sounds. "Honestly. Fourteen was old enough to be considered an adult when I was growing up." With a huff, she grabs the key to the room, slips her feet into her boots, and departs.
~~~CotD~~~
The steady drone of the train's engine blends with the rhythmic thrumming of the wheels on the track. This background noise allows Arturia to tune out the conversation taking place beside her, and dedicate her attention entirely to the countryside passing by her window. Although her head knows that uncountable years have passed, her heart sees the same rolling meadows and serene forests that she rode through during her lifetime. The train's path has taken it mostly through uninhabited areas, allowing Arturia to pretend that there are even small parts of Britain that have not changed beyond all recognition in her absence.
She shakes her head at the self-deceit. 'It would be better not to indulge in fantasy. At this speed, we should reach Londinium- no, London- soon. From what 'Grandfather' said when we were leaving, it is very much a modern city.' Arturia frowns at the window. 'It seems I will have ample time to see the differences with my own eyes.'
While he waited for the attendant at the hotel desk to process his account and finalize his checkout, her temporary grandfather had filled her in on their plans for the day. He and his granddaughter had originally planned to take the train back to London today, where they would stay for several more days until their flight back to Japan. He had apologized again for the delay before she could return home, but she had waved it off.
'I would be lying if I said that I was not interested in seeing how London has changed. A few days would not be an unforgivable delay in returning to Japan, after all. Yes,' Arturia thinks, 'that would not be something anyone could complain about. It is not as if there is anyone waiting for me in Japan.' So convinced, Arturia returns her full attention to the passing scenery. To her heart, scarred by Mordred's betrayal and insurrection and by seeing the ravages of plague, even the semblance of her peaceful home is a soothing balm.
A touch on her shoulder startles her out of her reverie. "Arturia-chan, are you alright?"
Arturia turns away from the window to her friend's concerned face. "Yes, I am fine."
"Are you sure? You looked really sad?"
"I am certain. I was reminiscing, but the memories themselves were not sad ones. I suppose it was nostalgia," she says wryly.
"Gramps says you're too young for nostalgia," Tai pouts. "Well, he says I'm too young for it, and you're my age so that means you are, too!"
Arturia just snorts in response. "Where did he go, anyway?"
"Gramps? He went for a walk." Tai waves expansively at the train in general. "He said all this sitting is bad for his old bones, the lying old coot."
Arturia laughs and turns back to the window, but before her eyes can refocus, her shoulder is tapped again.
"Hey, Arturia-chan, what were you doing in England? You've been here for a while, haven't you?"
"Yes. England is my ancestral homeland, as I believe you may have ascertained from my appearance," Arturia says pointedly.
"Eheheh..." Tai scratches her head. "You really look it. Long blond hair, pale skin, green eyes... You must be popular with the boys, huh?" she grins.
"Th-that is neither here nor there!" Arturia protests.
"Oh-ho!" The grin becomes predatory. "You're blushing, Arturia-cha~an!" She leans in closer. "There is someone, isn't there?"
The question brings up more memories, this time of her experiences in Japan. She is discomfited by the realization that many of her memories of Shirou are also of unpleasant experiences. Arturia shoves aside the tangled knot of feelings that realization dredges up and sighs. "I do not wish to talk about it."
'Not now, and certainly not with a near-stranger. Although there are very few people indeed whom I could talk about it with, and they are all in Japan.'
"Oh, sorry!" The previously enthusiastic girl knuckles her head in penance. "I didn't mean to pry."
"It is alright. You did not know, after all."
Tai nods her gratitude, and the conversations lulls. The train enters a tunnel, and Aturia, deprived of outside scenery to observe, coughs to break the silence.
'This is a good opportunity,' she thinks.
"Tai-chan, why did you come to England?"
"Well... " the Japanese girl looks around, "I guess nobody will overhear in here, huh?" She laughs sheepishly, then adopts a more somber expression. "It's pretty complicated, and you have to promise not to tell anyone! Do you promise?"
'An oath of secrecy? What could a child possibly require an oath of secrecy for?' Arturia wonders. 'Still, given that I do not know anyone else here, and I have no prior obligations, I cannot foresee any difficulty upholding such an oath...'
Her thoughts are interrupted by another poke to the same spot on her shoulder. "Arturia-chan?"
"My apologies. I was considering your request."
"You must have been considering it really seriously. Your face looked scary for a moment there." Tai shakes herself. "Well?"
"My face looked scary? No, never mind that." Arturia turns to face her friend. "You have my word," she says gravely. "I, Arturia Pendragon, swear to keep what you tell me in confidence until my death or you release me from this oath."
Tai gapes at Arturia. "Uh, wow. I, um... geeze, Arturia. A simple promise would have been fine, but thank you."
"You are welcome. Now, please continue," Arturia prompts.
"Right. Uh..." She taps a finger against her chin, obviously attempting to get her thoughts in order. "It's complicated, and I'm not really sure where to start."
"When telling a story, I believe it is normal to start at the beginning," Arturia says seriously.
"Hey!" Tai protests, then shakes her head. "No, nevermind. If you were anyone else, I'd say you were teasing me, but..." She sighs, staring at her lap. "Anyway, I guess it starts with my mother... Or even before that..." She chews on her lip, and when she looks at Arturia again, her expression is that of a lost child. "My family is yakuza." She says it defiantly, but her clenched hands betray her nervousness.
"I see." Arturia keeps her tone neutral. "Go on."
"You're not mad?" Her tone is hopeful.
Arturia arches a single eyebrow. "Is there something I should be angry about?"
"I thought you'd be mad at me for keeping it a secret," Tai says mournfully. "I don't think any of my friends at school would forgive me for not telling them. I don't think I'm supposed to talk about it... But I've never been told not to!" She giggles nervously. "I don't think my family knows how much I know... Sorry, I got sidetracked..."
"That's alright," Arturia reassures her. "Go on."
"Right. My mother... She wasn't yakuza. Not that Dad or Gramps are really proper yakuza, not like you read about in manga, anyway. Sure, they do things like swearing loyalty over sake, but it's like a business. The employees are paid and most of the business is legal. Sure, there's some shady stuff like gambling, but the guys are more intimidating than dangerous. So Mom was okay with marrying into a yakuza family, I guess." Tai sniffles. "She never seemed upset about it when Dad talked about work, anyway?" Tai looks at Arturia with watery eyes. "So, why did she have to die?"
Without warning, Arturia finds her arms full of crying teenager. She manages to free one arm from Tai's surprisingly strong grip, and pats the girl on the back. 'Do I really seem like such a good choice of person to cry on?' she wonders wryly.
"There, there," Arturia mumbles as tears soak through the shoulder of her shirt.
"Sorry," Tai finally sniffles. She releases Arturia and slumps back into her seat, rubbing at her eyes. "It's just..." She pauses to blow her nose loudly on a bright orange handkerchief. "Every time I think I'm getting over it, I think about her again and the next thing I know I'm crying my eyes out."
"Tai-chan," Arturia says, choosing her words with care, "I do not wish you to feel that you must, but if you believe that sharing the details would ease the burden, I will do my utmost to listen."
Tai giggles wetly. "Do you always say things so formally? You don't have to do that with me! We're friends, aren't we? I mean, I know I've been saying we are, but... Mom always said the way I always treat everyone like my friend was one of my good points..."
"This is simply how I speak," the former king responds somewhat stiffly. 'She means no offense, and I must take none,' she reminds herself. "But regardless of that, I am honored to count you amongst my friends."
'Undoubtedly,' Arturia thinks to herself, 'she is a more honest companion than many I have had, and that is a very valuable trait in one's friends.'
"I'm so happy!" Tai tries to fling herself at Arturia again, but the seats hamper her attempt, and she settles for a one-armed hug. "Ugh, your shirt is all wet, Arturia-chan!" She pulls back, wiping her hand on her pants. "I guess that's my fault, isn't it?"
"Please pay it no mind. The shirt will dry. In the mean time, were you going to tell me about your mother?" Arturia prompts.
"Mmm..." Tai shakes her head. "It'd take too long. Maybe when we have more time. I still want to answer your question about why I'm here, you know?"
"Very well then," Arturia nods seriously.
"Right." She punches the seat. "Mom was killed by a bunch of upstart punks who want to be yakuza, and were trying to get rid of Dad and Gramps and our family so they could move in."
Arturia's hands, resting on the edge of the seat, clench into fists. She forcibly relaxes them as she feels the plastic and metal of the frame begin to give under the pressure. 'It seems some tragedies occur in any place, in any era. Men desire power, and for that desire, they sacrifice the happiness of others.' She clenches her teeth to keep from interrupting.
"Dad and Gramps didn't want me to know, but I spied on them! I wanted to know the truth," she proclaims defiantly.
"Yes, that is a reasonable desire," Arturia agrees. She stops herself from suggestion what her friend should do with that knowledge. 'Her father and grandfather most likely do not wish her involved in this business, given that they were hiding things from her.'
"They caught me, though," Tai continues without any hint of shame. "Dad was really mad, but Gramps said that it's just like Dad's daughter to do something like that. Then he said that it'd also be like a child of Dad's to do something stupid about it, so he'd keep me out of the way while Dad took care of things. By tomorrow, I'm on leave of absence from school and Gramps has gotten us plane tickets to Europe for a month-long tour." She shrugs, but her expression turns dark. "I told Gramps that I just wanted to find whoever hurt Mom and beat them up, but he said Dad would be sad if I did that..."
She trails off and stares out the window for a moment. "I still want to. Is that wrong? It's not fair that the guys who hurt Mom get away with it!"
"I do not believe it is wrong," Arturia says firmly. "Rather, I cannot believe so. It cannot possibly be incorrect to wish to right a wrong," she says, somewhat wistful. "I also cannot believe your father would wish his daughter to dirty her hands with bringing scum like that to justice." Tai jerks around to face Arturia, glaring daggers. "Nor your mother," Arturia adds more quietly.
The angry expression subsides somewhat, but Tai still looks mutinous. "It's still not right!" she grumbles.
"About that... "
'How can I put this delicately, without being too obtuse for her to follow?' Arturia ponders. 'While she might find it comforting now, this might in the end lead to difficult questions for her father to answer. Then again, her grandfather did set me up for this without warning me what I was getting into...'
"Yeah?" Tai prods, her tone skeptical.
"It may be worth consideration," she says slowly, "what your grandfather meant when he said your father would take care of things while you were in Europe."
"That," the man in question says, startling the two girls, "is not something young girls like yourselves should be wondering about. Leave things like that to the adults."
"Gramps?!" Tai rises half out of her seat. "You heard all that?"
"Only the last part." He smiles, but it does not reach his eyes. "You told her everything, then?"
"Eh, yeah." Tai fidgets. "She's my friend, so it was okay. She promised not to tell anyone."
"I see." With a groan, her grandfather settles himself back into his empty seat. "I suppose your father and I were fools to think you'd just accepted things." His forehead creases in thought, and his granddaughter waits silently. "In that case, you probably have a lot of questions you'd like answered, don't you?"
"Yeah..." Tai admits.
"I will answer them to the best of my ability, then. However, there are some things I will not tell you, but I'll at least try to explain why. However," he abruptly turns to Arturia, "I am sorry to impose on you like this, but could I ask you to wait outside? It is all well and good that Tai-chan trusts you, but there are some things I would prefer not to share with a stranger."
"I understand. I will wait in the corridor until you call me back in." Arturia stands and slides open the compartment's door.
"Arturia-chan-" His voice is cold, and as sharp as a blade. "-please keep anything my granddaughter has shared with you to yourself."
Arturia stiffens. "I would never repeat something shared with me in confidence," she grates out as she slides the compartment door closed.
"Gramps! Don't threaten my friends! She promised not to tell!"
Arturia smiles slightly at Tai's rebuke of her grandfather. 'Friend, is it?' she thinks as she leans against the door. 'Have I come to make friends so easily? Is it truly so simple?'
The question is not an idle one. For most of her life, Arturia has believed that she has difficulty making friends. If friendship is so easily established, then there must have been another reason for her difficulties, even during her childhood.
'Is it simply a matter of concealing my sex?' She does not want to consider it, but the thought is inescapable. 'If I had grown up acting as a girl, would I have had companions other than Kay?' For a moment, she allows herself to imagine it. If the girl Arturia had drawn the sword as herself, instead of as the squire Arthur, what would have become of Britain? Would Arturia the warrior queen been as capable of leading the country? She cannot answer these questions, but she is certain that the tragedy of Lancelot and Guinevere would have been avoided, at least. With an effort, she shakes off her regrets.
'It is no use to wonder about that now. It cannot be changed. Besides,' she realizes, 'Arthur the scribe had little difficulty fitting in! Therefore, it cannot have simply been a matter of male or female.'
"Hmm." Arturia concentrates more seriously. 'Perhaps my knightly manner was off-putting, then?' She shakes her head after a moment of contemplation. 'That cannot be. I was the very model of chivalry and deportment.' Arturia nods to herself. 'My conduct was without a doubt, flawless.' A new thought brings a pleasant warmth to her heart. 'There were, after all, people who accepted me as a woman and as a knight.'
'Shirou...' Although her thoughts immediately go to Shirou, she cannot forget that there were others as well. 'Rin, too, even though she was an enemy Master, accepted me. Illyasviel, similarly, in her own way.' After a moment of indecision, Arturia allows herself to recall eating breakfast with the three of them, and smiles. 'Shirou, I will return. Wait for me.'
The door begins to move against Arturia's back. She straightens and turns around to face Tai's grandfather.
"I'm sorry for making you stand outside, Arturia-chan. Please, come back in," he says with a smile before stepping back inside, leaving the door open for her.
As Arturia steps through the door, she feels a stab of guilt. 'Is it wrong for me to be making new friends now, after being so recently separated from some, and while seeking to reunite with others?' She shakes her head. 'No, they would all wish for my happiness, I am sure of it.'
With an honest smile, she slides the door closed and turns to face her new friends. 'Forgive me,' she asks those left behind and those waiting for her, 'But I will I take my time and enjoy this journey.'
~~~CotD~~~
"Is this really alright?"
Arturia looks around at the endless racks and shelves of clothing. Even accounting for the sections for males and disregarding them from her estimation, the clothing amassed here is clearly sufficient to clothe a town. Clothing of more colors and styles than she has ever worn before surround her in all directions.
"You are telling me that I can select anything from this?" she asks the girl standing next to her.
"Yup!" Tai says cheerfully.
"But... there is so much... how am I to choose?" Arturia looks around, bewildered. "Where would I even start?"
"That's why we're shopping! Come on!" Tai grabs Arturia's arm and pulls her into the racks. "We only have a few hours, so we have to try on as much as we can!"
"Wait, Tai-chan!" Arturia protests, "I though our purpose here was simply to acquire clothing for me for the next three days!"
The girl in question skids to a halt and gapes at Arturia. "You-! You don't know how to shop, do you!?" she accuses.
Arturia is taken aback. "The purpose of shopping is the acquisition of new goods, is it not?"
"Well, yes, but when you say it like that..." Tai trails off, looking puzzled. "It doesn't sound quite right, you know?"
"I do not know what you mean. If our purpose is to acquire new goods, then we should choose the most efficient method of doing so."
"That's all wrong!" Tai shakes a finger at Arturia in outrage. "The point of shopping is to have fun buying stuff! We should choose the method that's the most fun, and that means trying on as much as possible. So you're not getting out of it that easily!"
She turns to the nearest shelf of clothing and begins thumbing through the articles there, then giggles nervously to herself. Arturia watches curiously as her friend glances across the signs and labels.
"Is something wrong?"
"Well, the thing is..." Tai scratches her head sheepishly. "I forgot I can't read English, okay?"
"You forgot you cannot read English," Arturia repeats flatly.
"Yup!" Tai laughs.
"But what about the numbers?" Arturia asks, inspecting the tag hanging from the waist of a skirt on the rack next to her.
"They're sizes, probably... I know my size, but they size things differently oversees. I'd go find Gramps to ask him to read stuff to us, but I don't think he'd be comfortable helping us pick out clothing." Tai mutters the last part under her breath.
"Why would he be uncomfortable assisting us? It is not as though we would be requesting his aid changing our clothing." Arturia realizes she has said something foolish as her friend's face contorts with the effort of controlling her laughter. "What is so funny?"
That question, asked seriously, is the last straw for the Japanese girl's fragile self-control, and she doubles over laughing.
"H-have you ever been shopping with a guy before?" she gasps. "They h-hate it!"
"Is that so?" Arturia wants to believe her friend would not lead her astray, but the girl's laughter reduces the credibility of her words. "Ah. Now that you mention it, there was one time at a store for stuffed animals..." she recalls.
"What?!" Tai shouts in surprise and pounces on Arturia, shaking her shoulders as she cuts loose with a lightning-fast barrage of questions. "A guy took to you a stuffed animal store? Was it a date? Was he your boyfriend? Why didn't you tell me you had a boyfriend? Does he like your hair? Why did he take you if he hated it? Did you have fun? Are you still dating?" When no reply is forthcoming, she slows to a stop. "Why aren't you answering me?"
Arturia just stares, bemused. 'Somehow, it had slipped my mind how excitable she could be.' The corners of her mouth twitch upward. 'She is certainly full of youthful enthusiasm.'
"Arturia-chaaaan," Tai whines, "are you laughing at me? It looks like you're laughing at me!"
"No, not at all," Arturia protests as she steps back out of Tai's grasp. "I was surprised to be reminded of that event, but it was a pleasant surprise."
"Pleasant, huh? So the date was 'pleasant' then?" Tai asks, prodding her shoulder.
"Yes. Now, as we cannot ascertain the correct sizes from the labels, and we are unable to obtain assistance, I believe the best way to determine the correct size would be to try on multiple copies of the same garment in varying sizes," Arturia suggests, turning to flip through a rack of simple skirts. "Once we have accomplished that, we can read the correct size from the label of the items that fit and use it to narrow down the possibilities for other garments."
"Yeah, that's a good idea. And we'll get to try on lots of stuff!" Tai grabs an entire stack of pants off the nearest shelf, and Arturia sighs in relief. "But how do we find the- hey!"
Tai spins around to face Arturia. "You tried to change the subject!" Arturia's shoulders slump. "Let's go find the changing rooms, and then you can tell me all about your date while we try this stuff on. Now let's see..." She looks around.
"Surely we could ask Grandfather at least this much?" Arturia suggests.
"That's too easy. This should be fun!"
"In that case, I have an idea. Come." Arturia walks back toward the wide aisle separating sections of densely-packed racks and shelves of clothing, looking about her. This late in the evening, the store is mostly deserted, and she quickly spots what she is looking for: a person folding clothing and putting it onto the shelves.
She approaches and clears her throat. "Excuse me," she says as politely as possible. She does not expect the person she believes is an employee to understand her, but the tone should help convey her meaning.
"██ █████? ███ █ ███ ███?" The employee looks up and asks a question, but as Arturia expected, she cannot understand it.
"My apologies," Arturia says, and holds up the armload of clothing and shrugs, looking around pointedly. As best she can with her arms full, she flips through the dresses she is holding and meaningfully inspects the tag on each, before looking up and trying to look confused.
She must have looked confused enough, because the employee takes the dresses from Arturia's arms and, after examining her from several angles, selects three from the stack which she hands back, and puts the rest with the clothes she returns to folding.
Arturia looks at Tai, who shrugs.
"Maybe she thought those would be mostly likely to fit you?" Tai offers.
"Perhaps, but we still do not know where the fitting room is," Arturia points out.
"Oh yeah! Um... I can try to ask her... My English isn't that good, though..." Tai fidgets nervously.
"Is that alright?" Arturia asks, puzzled. "I thought you did not wish to ask for help."
"Of course it's alright! She's a woman, and she's an employee, so we can ask her," Tai declares. "It's just embarrassing, since I don't speak English well."
"██ ███ ████ ████████ ████?" the employee interjects. Tai blushes.
"Please try," Arturia says firmly. "I cannot, so I must rely on you."
"Alright then," Tai agrees dubiously, and turns to the uniformed woman.
"███ ████... ███ ██████ ██████... ██ █████?" Tai says slowly. Although Arturia cannot understand her, she can tell her friend is being careful to enunciate clearly.
The woman opens her mouth, then closes it again with a shake of her head and beckons the two of them to follow her. Arturia looks at Tai, who shrugs.
"I think she understood me," Tai says uncertainly. "I could understand her, though!" she exclaims with sudden realization. "Her accent was much clearer!"
"Then we should follow her," Arturia decides, gathering up the skirts the employee had selected for her, as well as a pair of garishly green pants that fell from the pile in Tai's arms.
"Would you actually wear something like this?" she inquires as they walk.
Tai cocks her head at the pants. "Hmm... Probably not!" she says cheerfully. "They're kind of ugly, aren't they?"
"They are," Arturia affirms, "but if you would not wear them, why did you bring them to try on?"
"I thought it might be interesting to see what I looked like in that color, why else?" She gives Arturia a flat look. Arturia grabs her arm to stop her from walking into the woman they were following, juggling the clothing she is carrying in her free hand.
"I believe we have arrived." The employee points at a door-shaped entryway in the wall, and a brief look shows many small rooms inside, with large mirrors in each one. 'Ah... mirrors of such quality, and in such quantity... it seems so wasteful! I had forgotten that the modern era took such luxuries for granted.'
"Yup, this is the right place," Tai chirps. "█████ ███!" she says to the employee.
"Thank you," Arturia says sincerely, nodding to emphasize the sentiment. The woman nods back, and, with an uncertain glance backward over her shoulder, leaves them.
"Alright! Now, let's try on some clothes!" Tai rushes into the first changing room and drops the clothes she is carrying in an undignified heap. Tai starts to close the door, but reaches out to snag the green pants from Arturia as she walks past. "I think I'll try these on first!" she declares as she shuts the door. "Now get going!" she chides. "It's not every day we get a shopping spree in a foreign country!"
Silently, Arturia enters the next room and hangs the skirts on the hooks provided. 'It would be best to finish as quickly as possible to prevent her from overdoing it,' she thinks. 'I would not want to be responsible for Tai spending too much.'
"Arturia-chan," Tai calls over the wall, "try these on too!" The words are followed by a tangle of shirts. "And weren't you going to tell me about your date?"
"I was hoping you had forgotten," Arturia admits bluntly as she organizes the new garments, "but if you insist, then I will do so."
"Yes, please!"
Arturia sighs and removes the skirt with the smallest number on the tag from its hanger. "Very well. There is not much to tell. He tricked me into a date and took me to places he thought I would like, even though he disliked them. We had a conversation about it in the shop that sold stuffed animals, and your comment reminded me. That is all."
"Ehhh? That's it?" Tai protests. "But, did you have fun? What happened after that? Did you ever go on another date? What do you mean he tricked you?"
"Is it really necessary for you to know?" Arturia asks as she tries on the second skirt.
"Well, no," Tai concedes, and Arturia can clearly imagine the girl's pout just from her tone. "But I'm curious. We're friends, but I don't really know much about you yet."
'That... is a good reason,' Arturia admits to herself as she checks the fit on the waistband. 'It would not be proper to respond to good intentions with resentment.' She steels herself for her friend's questions. "In that case, I will answer your questions I did not have fun because my mind was on other things, and I considered it a waste of time. We did not go on another date, because shortly after that, I left for Britain. He did not make his romantic intentions clear to me, so I had only the indications from a mutual friend to rely on. I did realize just before I left, however."
"Arturia-chan, it sounds like you like him," Tai sings in a delighted voice, and Arturia sees in the mirror her cheeks turning red.
'Why am I blushing from her teasing? It is something to be proud of,' she confirms to herself.
"No, Tai-chan, that is incorrect..." Arturia trails off.
"You don't? But it really sounded like you do," Tai interrupts with a depressed tone. "Maybe I need my ears checked."
"I was not finished. It would be incorrect to say I like him. I love Shirou," Arturia says firmly.
When there is no immediate response, Arturia finishes putting her original clothes back on and collects the things she was trying on. "I am going to look for more things in the sizes that fit me," she says as she leaves her mirrored fitting room.
"Wait!" Tai bursts through the door to her changing room, both legs through one side of a pair of pants and her shirt half on. "Give me a moment to get dressed and I'll come with you!"
"I will wait." Arturia looks around, trying to ignore the banging coming from the fitting room as her friend rushes to get dressed. "Please take your time."
"I don't want to make you wait, though!"
"That is alright," Arturia reassures her, inspecting a rack and bin of assorted clothing in an alcove near the entrance. "I think there is a place here to put the things we do not wish to keep," she says, hanging the skirts that did not fit on the rack and folding the shirts into the bin.
"Great!" Tai says as she staggers out with an armload of jumbled clothing. "I have a lot of things that didn't fit." With a grunt, she dumps the entire pile into the bin. Arturia's eyebrow twitches.
"Tai-chan," she begins, but her friend cuts her off, and Arturia loses her will to complain at her friend's tone.
"You know... Arturia-chan..." Tai says slowly as they walk back toward the women's clothing, "That boy, Shirou... He's why you're trying so hard to get back to Japan, isn't it?"
"That is correct. I am in your debt and your grandfather's for your assistance."
Tai waves her off. "More importantly, you said it was 'just before you left for Britain,' but it sounded like it was a long time ago. How long have you been here?"
"Ah." Arturia stops walking. 'That could lead to dangerous questions. But lying would be wrong. Nevertheless, I must give her an answer.'
"About a year, I suppose," she says. She begins walking again.
"A year?!" Tai gasps. "But you don't speak English at all! How did you survive here for a year?"
"I would prefer not to talk about it," Arturia responds softly. 'That is certainly true. I would prefer not to even think about it, when it hurts so much to recall them...'
"Oh." Tai says in a small voice. "I'm sorry."
"It's alright," Arturia reassures her. "Tell me, how have you liked Britain so far?"
"Eh?" Tai seems taken aback by the sudden change of topic, but recovers quickly. "It's great, you know? The food is interesting, the people seem friendly, and the scenery is beautiful. Japan is all cities, cities, cities, you know? I've been out to the countryside there, but even then it feels tamed. In Europe, there are huge places that feel wild, still. It was great to visit them."
"I see," Arturia smiles. "It sounds like you've had a lot of fun."
"Yeah! I'd really like to come back some day!" she exclaims. "I should probably get better at English first, though, huh?"
"It certainly could not hurt," Arturia agrees. "But come, let us finish our shopping. It would not do to keep your grandfather waiting."
"Hey, don't forget that he's your grandfather, too, until we get back to Japan at least. Neither of my parents have any siblings, so you're the closest thing to a cousin or a sister I've ever had!"
"I shall endeavor not to forget that. But please focus."
"Sure, Onee-san!"
Arturia twitches. "Please do not tease me like," she implores.
"Fine, fine," Tai sulks. "Let's just go look for more clothes, then."
~~~CotD~~~
"Are you sure you have everything you want?" Tai's grandfather asks wryly, looking at the armload of clothing his granddaughter is carrying. "Perhaps you left a few pieces of clothing for the store to sell to other customers."
"Gramps!" Tai protests, "that's not fair! They had so many interesting colors and patterns! Look!" She shakes the clothes at him, but stops when she realizes that if she drops anything, she will not be able to pick it up. "At least I'm not boring like Arturia-chan! Blue and black and blue and white and black and white."
"They are good colors!" Arturia says defensively, holding up the clothing folded over her arms for emphasis. "They are suitable for all occasions and appear dignified as well."
"Sure, sure, dignified. That's why you got a suit, right? Because it's dignified?" Tai teases as she unloads her arms onto the checkout counter.
"A suit?" her grandfather asks curiously.
"Yeah, jacket and tie and nice shoes, too. I told her to get sneakers, and she did, but she insisted they weren't right with a suit. All in black, too" Tai confirms. "She looks like one your guys, you know. Especially when she looked in the mirror. Then her face got all serious."
"Are you saying there was something wrong with my face, Tai-chan?" Arturia asks with a tight smile.
"No no no of course not!" Tai waves her hands in protest. "You looked really mature."
"Is that so?" Arturia mumbles. 'Undoubtedly, it brought back memories. I should be more careful. Perhaps I should not buy it after all.'
"A suit, hmm?" Tai's grandfather looks her up and down, then nods approvingly. "It is good to have appropriate clothing for any occasion, and picking the correct shoes shows you know what you're doing. Put your selections down so the clerk can scan them, Arturia-chan."
Reluctantly, Arturia complies. 'It would seem strange if I changed my mind now,' she laments.
"Ugh, this won't all fit in one bag," Tai complains from the end of the counter. Arturia looks to see her trying to stuff her clothing into a large plastic bag in a giant wad and rushes to stop her.
"Tai-chan, that is inefficient! You should fold clothing to pack it so it will take up less space. Like this," she says, briskly folding the girl's purchases and stacking them on the counter. "Now they will fit."
"You're right..." Tai looks quizzically at the folded clothing as she puts it into the bag Arturia is holding open. "It's like magic!"
"It is simply experience and practice," Arturia laughs, folding her own clothes into a smaller bag on top of her new shoes.
"I guess I'm lacking in both, then," Tai says sadly. "Hey, Arturia-chan, why is your bag so small?"
"This is all I will need until I have returned to Japan. I do not wish to take advantage of Grandfather's generosity any further," she explains.
"I appreciate the sentiment, but are you certain you have everything you need?" the man in question asks.
"Yes," Arturia nods and holds up her bag. "This will be sufficient. I have acquired everything I might reasonably require for the next three days."
"If you say so," he says skeptically. "I've taken care of the bill, so we can go check into our lodgings for the night, if there is nothing else. Tai-chan!" he calls to his granddaughter, "come on, we're leaving!"
"Coming, Gramps!" she yells back from the midst of a display of pastel shirts with stylistically Asian designs. "They put some really weird kanji on some of these!"
Arturia thinks for a moment. "There is one thing I would like to know," she says. "Why are you doing so much to help me? You are bringing me back to Japan, which is already far more than I could ask. Purchasing a new wardrobe is unnecessary. Not that I do not appreciate your assistance, but why would you do so much for a stranger?"
"Well," her benefactor responds slowly, "there are a few reasons. I could tell you that it'll be easier to get through airport security if you are dressed better, which is true. I could tell you that I am doing it because it makes my granddaughter happy, which is also true. But even if those were not the case, I would do it anyway. I would help you because it is within my power to do so, and it is the right thing to do. Can you accept that?"
"Yes. Your answer is most satisfactory," Arturia says warmly. "It is undoubtedly the responsibility of those who can to-" She cuts herself off with a sudden realization. "I am sorry. Coming from someone in my position, that must sound conceited. Please forgive me."
"Maybe a little," he laughs. "Don't worry about it. You seem like an honest young woman, and I am sure if our positions were reversed, you would do the same for me."
"Of course," Arturia agrees somberly. "If it were within my power."
"What are you two talking about?" Tai interjects. "I thought we were leaving."
"We were just talking while waiting for you," her grandfather says before Arturia can respond. "If you're done critiquing their use of kanji and reestablishing the superiority of Japanese culture, perhaps we could depart now?"
"I'm done, I'm done," Tai sighs. "It's not like it'd do any good to tell the employees that their shirts are gibberish. Let's go, I'm beat!"
"I do not wish to upset your plans," Arturia says quickly as they walk out the door, "but if it is not urgent to check in at our residence for the evening, I would not mind if we had dinner first."
"As long as we're there before nine," he agrees. "Tai-chan, would you prefer to eat first?"
"Now that you mention it, I'm hungrier than I am tired. Food first!" Hefting her bags, the girl darts ahead. "Come on, you two, I'm starving!"
~~~CotD~~~
Arturia kneels upright on the floor of her room. Avalon, materialized, rests under her hands before her, and though her muscles shake with exhaustion, she maintains her posture.
'It is almost dawn,' she reminds herself again, 'I shall sleep then.' The hotel room is no church, and she lacks armor or a sword, but she refuses to let that interfere with her resolution. Her suit is a poor substitute for a suit of armor, but the formal attire is the best she could manage.
Her tired mind wanders down well-worn paths as she tries to tune out the slow ticking of the clock behind her. 'I could not hold vigil for them as they lay dying. Though it may be meaningless now, I would be a failure as a knight if I could not endure a single night. They deserved more. They deserved my presence. It is not enough, but it is all I can do now. If nothing else, they will be remembered properly.'
Her hands clench on the metal of Avalon, warm from her grip. 'I should have asked Tai's grandfather to help me find a church. Surely, in a city this size, there would have been a church that would have permitted me to conduct my farewells in a more dignified fashion.' She regrets it, but there was no longer any time. Tonight is the last night she will be in Britain, and she resolved to properly mourn the passing of her friends from her home in Cornwall before she left the country. 'At least I can spare a night to remember them.' When men died in battle, they were often buried in a hurried ceremony and left behind. The well-being of the living always took priority over proper respect for the dead. 'Not that my soldiers ever appreciated that,' Arturia thinks bitterly.
'Still,' she reminds herself, 'am I not again making the same decision? Am I not laying my regrets to rest tonight, so that I can look to the future and the living?' In the long hours of the night, she made the effort to recall as much as she could of her time in that town. Laughing in the inn with Sigbert and Caelin over ale at the end of a long day... a picnic dinner on the moor with Eadwyn and Ceolwin after searching for plants to make inks and dyes for her own work and their mother's... She had finally met her namesake, Caelin's son, and found a friend there, although she did not see him much. The many pleasant memories had helped salve the still-raw wound of her sudden separation from them.
Despite her resolution, Arturia knows she cannot let go of all her regrets so easily. Time to think has also given her time to analyze her actions at that time in excruciating detail. She concluded early in the night that her decision to leave resulted from her instinctive desire to uphold the oath and duties of a king despite lacking the ability and authority of a king. At that time, her vigil, a simple memorial until then, became penance as well, and she swore to herself that she would not let a similar mistake happen again.
Arturia bites her lip as she feels herself beginning to lose her concentration on staying awake. 'It is getting lighter. It cannot be much longer until the sun rises, now.' She shakes her head, both to fight of sleep and in self-admonishment. 'Never before have I been so given to melancholy. I have always fallen easily into introspection... But it is only recently, I think, that I have focused more on the past than on the future. In the past, I never doubted my actions. Right or wrong, they were the best decisions I could make at the time, and that was good enough. Now, even if I know it was the right decision to make, I still question it.' She sighs heavily. 'I should curse Shirou for making me doubt myself. If he had not been so stubborn... I should curse him, but I should also thank him. I will have to remember to do both the next time I see him.'
She blinks against the burning in her eyes, then blinks again when it does not alleviate. "Oh."
The sun has risen and is shining in her window. Arturia squints against the brightness as she levers herself to her feet, and sighs in relief as her muscles uncramp. "It is good that the night has ended," she says aloud, her voice thick. "My thoughts have become quite nonsensical."
Unsteadily, she walks to the window. "Farewell, my friends. I shall never forget you." With a single jerking motion, she yanks the curtains closed and turns back to the room.
'Today, I return to Japan,' she thinks as she sprawls across her bed, fully-dressed. 'It would be good to sleep before Tai comes to wake me. I will need at least a little rest in order to have my wits about me.' The soft mattress tugs at her consciousness, and she barely manages to prop Avalon against the wall before falling asleep.
~~~CotD~~~
Arturia stretches uncomfortably in her seat. Because of the last-minute nature of her ticket for the plane, she is seated near the back of the plane, too far from the only people she knows for polite communication. Tai's grandfather had offered to sit separately so the two girls could sit together, but Arturia had refused to inconvenience the man any further.
'It is probably just as well,' she thinks, stifling a yawn. 'It looks like Tai is very excited to be flying, and I think I would prefer to sleep. Two hours of sleep this morning before departure were not sufficient.' Despite her exhaustion and aching muscles, she does not regret her decision to hold a vigil last night.
'I still wish I had not left. Despite everything, I wish, too, that I had not slept in Avalon's embrace. Nimue and Merlin both warned me against that. In its active form, it surrounds me in a bubble of the Faerie realm, and all know that time passes differently there. If I am to sleep on the plane, it would be safest to remove Avalon's barrier.'
Carefully, she materializes Avalon under her row of seats, below the bags stowed there.
'That should be sufficient,' she decides, testing it with her foot. 'If I do sleep, any attempt to move it will surely wake me, and I will certainly be able to dissolve it again almost immediately.'
To her pleasure, Arturia found over the past few days that maintaining Avalon's barrier form during the day was not a substantial drain on her prana. Compared to her life, when the only time she wanted to use it as a barrier was during battles, she has nothing else to use her prana for now. Without the drain of using prana burst to move under her heavy armor and strike her foes, her natural production is more than adequate to meet the demand.
'If only that were the case when I was Servant,' she thinks wistfully. 'It would have made things so much easier.' As a Servant, not only did she rely upon prana burst to increase her agility and strength, but she also had to maintain Invisible Air and her armor in combat. While she could release either of those if necessary for the advantages it would yield, in general she preferred not to.
'Ah, that reminds me... Certainly, the last time I flew on a plane, it was not so cramped.' With a sigh, she relaxes backward and closes her eyes. Compared to this public airliner, the private jet the Einzbern family had chartered to fly her and Irisviel to Japan was much more comfortable. 'It would be unforgivable for me to complain in these circumstances, however. At the very least, I am seated against the window and can sleep undisturbed.'
'Irisviel...' Arturia heart clenches. 'You were a true friend. You befriended me despite my circumstances, not because of them. Sir Kay, perhaps.. he was a brother to me, but when I assumed the throne he was also a knight in my service. Lancelot could have been, but he was my knight before he was my friend.' She sighs, and it turns into a yawn. 'I was truly lucky to have met Irisviel. It more than compensated for having that Kiritsugu as a Master. However, fate truly is cruel... That is sufficient proof that the world is not just.'
Arturia yawns again. 'Enough. I should sleep now, and be recovered by the time I arrive in Japan. A soldier truly can sleep under any circumstances,' she thinks with pride. 'My muscles may not quickly forgive me for sleeping like this, but sleep I will.' She forcibly stills her thoughts and calms her breathing, techniques any veteran of her campaigns would have mastered or found a substitute for. As soon as she relaxes her efforts to fight it, the fatigue from her long night overcomes her, and she succumbs to sleep.