Munkustrap sighed as he tiredly rubbed at his eyes. He could no longer remember the last time he had gotten a decent night's sleep. Every night, the nightmares, the horrible memories, would continue to plague him…but they were getting worse, now the nightmares were starting to involve Quaxo, Tantomile, Cori, Tugger and all of the ones he loved…they were the ones being hurt instead of him, because of him.
Munkustrap gave a shudder, stretching out, before he left his den, walking out into the clearing. He gave a smile as he watched the kittens tumbling around the clearing, even little Jemima was playing with them.
"Good morning," A purr came from beside him as two cats rubbed against his sides. Munkustrap smiled, turning his head to look at both Coricopat and Tantomile.
"Morning," Munkustrap greeted, purring softly in return.
"How are you this fine morning?" Tantomile questioned as they headed over to the tyre, leaping upon it and stretching out in the warm morning sun.
"I'm fine," Munkustrap smiled, stretching out. He gave a groan as Cori rudely slumped onto his back, laughing.
"Cori!" Tantomile sighed as she grabbed her twin's tail and pulled him off of Munkustrap. Cori gave a huff, pouting at his twin. Tantomile rolled her eyes.
"You are such a kitten sometimes," She muttered.
"Am not!"
"Are too!"
"Not!"
"Are!"
Munkustrap laughed as he shook his head at the twins' behaviour.
"You two are nuts, do you know that?" Munkustrap teased as he settled down on the tyre. Both Coricopat and Tantomile turned to look at him and poked their tongues out at him simultaneously. Munkustrap chuckled as he lay back down, watching the occupants in the clearing.
Even though he was technically on leave with his Protector duties, he still watched over the yard when he could.
He, Cori and Tantomile lay on the tyre for a while, each lost in their own thoughts, when Quaxo came running up, smiling.
"Cori, Tanti, it's time for my lesson!" He chirped happily. Munkustrap reached down from the tyre, mussing up Quaxo's head fur as Coricopat and Tantomile sat up, stretching out their limbs as they nodded.
"Yes, of course, Quaxo," Tantomile smiled. Munkustrap ruffled Quaxo's head-fur once more as the twins slipped off the tyre gracefully.
"Have fun," He smiled. The three walked off to their practise clearing, Quaxo walking in between the twins as he chatted to them. Munkustrap settled back down on the tyre, watching as the trio walked away, a small shudder running through his body as he remembered one of the nightmares from last night.
Quaxo had been the one that had been hurt, the small Tuxedo was battered and broken, covered in blood and crying out as the dark shadows continued to hurt him. Munkustrap had tried and tried to help his nephew but just couldn't reach him as Quaxo screamed his name, begging for help.
Munkustrap pulled himself out of the memory of the terrible nightmare when he heard a soft voice call his name.
"Munkus?" The gentle voice called again. Munkustrap blinked, focusing, and smiled when he saw Jemima standing in front of the tyre, looking in his direction.
"Hello, Jemima," Munkustrap greeted. Jemima was coming along in leaps and bounds with her restricted sight. She could now find cats just by listening for them and by following their scents, which was a lot easier now as her sense of smell had become stronger due to her not having her eye-sight to rely on.
"How are you, Munkus?" She asked, smiling at him.
"I am doing well,"' He replied. "How are you?"
"I'm good," Jemima beamed before it faltered. "Are you sure you're okay?" She questioned. "Your voice sounded a little flat."
"I am just tired, Jemima," Munkustrap told her gently. Jemima gave a nod, looking unsure.
"Was there something you were after, Jem?" Munkustrap pressed. Jemima blinked, suddenly remembering why she had come over to him.
"The others are playing hide and seek, and I can't really play it," Jemima explained, her feet shuffling slightly. "A-And I was wondering if we could go for a walk around the yard?" Munkustrap smiled.
"Of course," He slipped off of the tyre, gently taking Jemima's small paw in his own larger one. They walked around the pathways, talking.
"Hey, Munkus?" Jemima asked hesitantly.
"Mm?"
"W-Why is Quaxo staying with Cori and Tantomile or Bustopher and Vicky?" She asked. Munkustrap gave a small sigh.
"It's…it's just what is best for him at the moment," Munkustrap replied softly. "I-I haven't been doing so well and I don't want to hurt him."
"But you'd never hurt him," Jemima piped up, confused. "You'd never hurt any of us."
"Not intentionally," Munkustrap clarified. Jemima frowned.
"Did you accidently hurt him?"
"Almost." He admitted. Jemima cuddled his side as they walked.
"Is that why you're having nightmares?" Jemima questioned innocently. Munkustrap glanced at her. "I heard Jenny telling Skimble…"
"No, that's not the reason," Munkustrap sighed softly. "The nightmares are the reason I almost hurt Quaxo," Jemima looked at him sadly.
"They must be horrible nightmares," Jemima murmured as she hugged his waist tightly. Munkustrap smiled at her attempts to comfort him.
"I-Is there anything I can do to help?" She asked sweetly. Munkustrap stopped walking so he could kneel down and hug her close.
"Just keep being you, Jem," He murmured. "It's great to see you smile." Jemima purred as she cuddled close. Munkustrap hugged her back tightly, eyes squeezing shut as he tried to keep back the flashbacks to the nightmares where she was the one hurt.
"Munkus?" Jemima whispered. Munkustrap blinked, letting her go.
"Sorry, Jem," Munkustrap smiled weakly. "I got caught up in my thoughts."
"Which you shouldn't apologize for, Munkustrap," Munkustrap slowly stood up, turning around to face the Tom whose voice that belonged too. Macavity was standing in the middle of the path, arms lazily crossed against his chest as he stood there, grinning.
"What are you doing here?" Munkustrap asked calmly, as he gently pushed Jemima to stand behind him.
"M-Munkus, w-who's there?" Jemima whispered as she grabbed onto the fur on his back.
"It's alright, Jem," Munkustrap soothed her before he turned his attention back to Macavity. Macavity just smiled at him before it faltered slightly.
"I came to check on you," Macavity finally answered. "I've heard rumours that you've been taken off Protector Duties," Munkustrap gave a small incline of his head.
"Because of…" Macavity broke off, looking at Jemima. "Because of the past coming back?" He continued. Munkustrap gave him a thankful look for not being more clear and revealing the real issue to Jemima.
"Yes, Tugger and I ran into someone from my past and…and it brought back far too many memories," Munkustrap explained, just needing his older brother's advice and comfort. Macavity winced before taking in a deep breath.
"I thought I could help."
"How?" Munkustrap questioned. "You're not even meant to be here, I'm not even meant to be talking to you." Macavity shrugged at that.
"Well, sometimes rules need to be bent." He grinned. Munkustrap fidgeted nervously at the mention of breaking rules. Macavity ran his paw through his long, wild, tangled head-fur.
"Munk, I-I want you to meet someone." Macavity said hesitantly. Munkustrap glanced up at him from where he had been checking on Jemima.
"Really?" Munkustrap asked curiously. Macavity gave a small nod.
"I think it will help you." Munkustrap shook his head, gently taking Jemima's paw.
"Meeting someone isn't going to help with the nightmares, Mac," Munkustrap told him, going to turn away.
"Well, it's more like re-meeting them." That caused Munkustrap to pause. Macavity took this as a sign to continue on.
"Look, Munk, where I'm living now, with this family…I've learnt a few things," Macavity started. "I've basically become a part of their family, I'm second-in-charge basically and will take over the organisation once Tomas retires, I know everything about his family…well, I thought I did." He explained. "My friend, the Queen who is always by my side and Tomas's daughter, has told me stories about her family, ones I have never heard, including stories about her mother." Macavity looked at Munkustrap, who was staring at him.
"Griddlebone's mother is, well, slightly insane," Macavity explained slowly. "She was kidnapped years ago and was missing for two years, and in that time, she just…broke." Munkustrap winced at that.
"But when Tomas managed to save her, he brought her back home and did all he could for her, and while she did get better physically, she wasn't quite all there mentally." Macavity looked at Munkustrap, hesitating.
"However, while she knew what was going on, there were days when she just rambled on," Macavity continued. "The one she rambled on most about, that she can't let go of, she called her Shining Star." Munkustrap's breath caught in his throat.
"It's Pearl, Munkus," Macavity told him gently. "And she still remembers you, still adores you,"
Munkustrap couldn't think, couldn't speak, he was in a state of shock.
"She keeps speaking about you, wondering what happened to you…she thinks you died, Munkus."
Munkustrap couldn't breathe.
Pearl still thought about him, but she thought he was dead?
She had been the only good thing in his time as a slave, one who cared for him and looked out for him, even if it was just for a little while.
She made him fight back, she gave him the way to survive and not break.
"Easy, Munkus, breathe… breathe," Munkustrap blinked as paws touched his shoulders. He found he was on his knees on the ground, just having been unable to stand anymore. Macavity was crouched by his side, paws on his shoulders as Jemima stood beside him.
"I shouldn't have told you," Macavity murmured. "I just thought it would help the both of you," Munkustrap looked at him.
"No, I needed to know," He managed to croak.
"M-Munk, are you okay?" Jemima whimpered, gently reaching out to touch him, just to reassure herself he was still there.
"I'm fine, Jem, I-I just got a bit of a surprise." Munkustrap answered. Macavity gave a wry smile at that.
"Do you want to see her?" Macavity asked him quietly. Munkustrap gave a nod.
"I just need to take Jemima back to the others," Munkustrap replied. Macavity frowned, looking back the young Queen-kit, eyes searching. He winced when he finally discovered the clouded over eyes.
Macavity looked back to Munkustrap and gave a nod.
"I'll wait here for you." He murmured. Munkustrap nodded as he stood up, taking Jemima's paw and leading her back towards the main clearing.
"M-Munks, a-are you sure you should go?" Jemima piped up nervously. Munkustrap let out a long breath.
"Yes, Jemima, it's just something I have to do." Munkustrap told her softly. He stopped her before they reached the clearing.
"Jem, I'm going to ask you not to tell anyone that I met up with this Tom." Munkustrap told her. Jemima looked at him, confused.
"Why?"
"Because…because this is just something I need to do, and the others will ask questions which I'm not ready to answer." Jemima gave a small nod. Munkustrap walked Jemima the rest of the way to the clearing, watching as she went to go sit with Victoria, before he headed back to meet Macavity.
'Cori, Tantomile, can you hear me?' Munkustrap thought.
'Yes, we can,' Tantomile's voice replied in his mind. Munkustrap quickly told them what had just transpired.
'You are going with Macavity, alone, to see her?' Cori's voice questioned worriedly.
'It's something I need to do,' Munkustrap replied. 'Besides, if something happens, you know who to look for,'
'Just be careful, okay?' Tantomile told him. Munkustrap smiled at their concern.
'Don't worry, I will be,' Munkustrap walked onto the path where Macavity stood, waiting.
"Are you ready?" Macavity asked him, gold eyes concerned as he looked at his adopted brother. Munkustrap nodded, breathing in deeply.
"More then I'll ever be," Munkustrap murmured. Macavity gave a nod in agreement. They headed out of the junkyard, Munkustrap following Macavity closely. He frowned when he noticed other cats scurrying away, frightened, when they caught sight of Macavity, who seemed totally at ease as he strolled down the streets.
Munkustrap looked at Macavity, examining his older brother closely. Macavity looked confident, and somewhat smug, as he walked beside him, seeming to exclude an air of power.
Munkustrap became weary of his brother then, just knowing that there was a reason these random cats were afraid of Macavity.
"We're here, Munk," Macavity murmured as they came to a stop in front of an old cottage. Munkustrap paused, taking a in a deep breath, trying to steal himself and control the emotions trying to bubble out of the control.
"I'm ready," Munkus murmured as Macavity looked at him questioningly, looking concerned. Macavity nodded, moving as a piece of wood serving as the door, before entering.
Munkustrap took in another breath before following.
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