Chapter 6:
"And that's...the last...one."
Yukiko panted heavily as she shoved one last memory behind a door and straightened up wiping the sweat from her brow. She looked around her and saw what looked like a very long corridor with doors standing on either side. A little ways down, a Nightingale flitted about from door to door until it reached her side.
"All the doors seem to be completely stable," it explained with relief. "Not a single one appears to be bulging. It seems the plan worked."
"Thank goodness," Yukiko sighed again. "Now, going through the memories of each person should be much easier. I just hope it's enough, Soyokaze."
"There's really only one way to find out," the blade's spirit murmured. "It's been two and a half days. You really should get up and get something to eat."
As if on cue Yukiko's stomach growled loudly and she opened her eyes to see herself back in the plum orchard. "Oh, right, this is where I started my meditation," she murmured. She groaned as she began shifting her arms and legs and stretched as much as possible. Her limbs ached from not moving for so long and she paused as her stomach growled again. "Eh...you were right, Soyokaze. I'm starving."
Slowly, so as not to get a head rush, or make her aching body worse, she got to her feet and began making her way toward where she remembered the cafeteria being. Her mind was so focused on her destination that she barely registered who she passed on the way.
Eventually she made it to the building where the smell of food was wafting out of it and her mouth started watering. "So hungry," she grumbled before stepping inside. She sincerely hoped they'd be willing to give her the amount of food she needed. After all, going longer than 48 hours without any food was a bad idea.
She stepped through the front doors and immediately headed to the counter where all the food was available. Then she proceeded to request a serving of each of the items available, ending in her platter nearly overflowing with food. Once she'd gathered as much as she wanted she made her way over to a table. Luckily for her, she spotted an open seat next to two of her good friends.
"Darui, Sakagi," she greeted with a grin as she sat down, setting the platter on the table. "How are you guys holding up?"
"Uh, shouldn't we be asking you that?" Darui asked nervously. "You were out of it for two whole days. Were you able to finish?"
"How do you feel?" Sakagi asked calmly.
Yukiko took her time chewing her food as she thought through her answer. "I'm better...relatively speaking," she explained. "At the very least the near constant headache I had before is gone. Plus most of the bulging pressure seems to be lessened. But we won't know for sure if it'll work until I talk to Unohana or Youruichi."
"Oh, speaking of which, Youruichi showed up just after you started and wanted to talk to you," Darui cut in suddenly remembering their conversation. He went on to relay the message the ex-captain had left behind. He finished explaining all of it about the same time Yukiko finished eating.
"I see...so Ichigo and the others have already left," she murmured softly. "Bummer, I was hoping to send them off. I kind of owe them." She made a mental note to figure out what the woman had meant by "the 11 of us". But that would have to wait until later. "So, was there anything else I missed?"
"Yes." The three glanced up to see that Shuhei had approached their table and seemed to have caught the end of their conversation. "Captain Unohana, Captain Ukitake, and Captain Shunsui have all requested that you visit them when you get the chance."
"That makes sense," Yukiko chuckled sweating a little. Meeting one alone she was sure would be difficult, but all three? She'd need a break in between them or something. Of this she was certain. "Well, then I guess I'd better get going. I'm not doing any good just sitting around here after all."
She got to her feet and began walking away, but paused when she felt her hand being caught by another. "Ume, please don't push yourself," Darui asked worriedly. "I don't want you to fall into one of those fits without one of us to pull you out of it."
"Just watch yourself," Sakagi inputted without looking up at her.
"I will, thank you both," she murmured, giving them both a reassuring smile. "It'll probably take a while to visit all three, but I'll try to get it done quickly. Then maybe the five of us could have one of our old training sessions."
"Yeah!" Darui exclaimed excitedly.
"Only if you think you can handle it," Sakagi grunted.
"Just get moving," Shuhei cut in. "You're no use to anyone if you can't get over this."
"I know...and don't worry, Shuhei, I promise I'll talk to you more about Kensei at a later date," she stated with a teasing lilt to her voice. "You'll just have to wait until I'm a little farther along."
With that she took off and Shuhei groaned. "You want to talk to her about the ex-Captain Muguruma?" Darui asked in confusion.
"That's none of your concern," he retorted quickly. "Just finish here and return to your duties. There's still a lot we need to take care of."
"Yes, sir," Darui and Sakagi both saluted.
After this, Shuhei made his way out of the cafeteria making a beeline for the offices. As usual, he had a lot of work to take care of himself. He had to complete the tasks of both the lieutenant and captain. A full-time job...one that had him almost constantly working. Still, as he walked along the path toward the office, he couldn't help the little piece of him that wiggled inside in excitement. She'd promised to tell him more about the captain he'd admired for so long. He would make sure she kept that promise.
Several hours after her departure, Yukiko stepped into the office of the squad 4 captain. Her hands were twitching at her side as she made her way over to the only seat available, barely comprehending that the female captain had greeted her. It couldn't be helped; ever since she entered the area she was able to sense the captain's reiatsu causing her to be more and more on edge. Now that she was in the woman's presence, she could feel the pressure in her mind return with almost full force.
"It's been a while, Captain Unohana," she murmured, forcing herself to sit down. "Might I ask the reason you called me?"
"I simply wished to evaluate your current state one-on-one," Unohana explained. "We need to know for sure..."
"If I'm going to turn on anyone...I know," Yukiko cut her off. "I get it. I was trapped by him for so long you have to be careful. Just go ahead and ask what you want. I'll answer as best as I can."
The captain nodded in understanding before making a note on the pad sitting on her desk. "I'm glad you're so willing," Unohana murmured. "Because what I need to know, is exactly what was done to you while in Aizen's custody."
Yukiko flinched at this as her hands tightened on either side of her body. Inside, she felt one of the doors strain at the very thought and knew Soyokaze was going to have her hands full trying to keep it all contained.
"I...can't give any real...details," she struggled to say, looking anywhere but at the fourth squad captain. "To be honest...I'm not sure I can even admit in general terms...what he did."
Unohana made another note while observing the nervous tension that continued to grow within the girl before her. "Yukiko, if I am to determine how best to handle your situation, I need to understand what damage was done to your mind," she explained calmly.
"I know that!" Yukiko snapped. Right away her eyes widened in shock before sinking back down into her seat and taking several deep calming breaths. She was pleased to note that she was able to regain control on her own strength...thanks to the meditation lessons from Tousen and Soyokaze's constant attempts to keep the many doors closed. "Look, Captain Unohana, I understand the importance of knowing what I went through, but right now it's a struggle to keep in mind that you're actually trying to help me. I doubt dragging up memories of the pain he inflicted will be beneficial right now."
"I'm not asking for a detailed description of what he's done," Unohana returned softly. She didn't appear to be fazed by the ex-soul reaper's outburst, but really she was worried about it. "We already know he used his illusions on you. We just need to know in what fashion."
Yukiko looked away from her again and began shuffling her feet nervously. While Unohana believed she was simply trying to think things over, she was really having another struggle.
"Again? But we just closed it!" Yukiko exclaimed as the inner version of her strained to keep one of three doors from being thrown open. "I thought this was supposed to make it easier!"
"It is, and if you notice not all the doors are bulging," Soyokaze called back and she flitted between the other two shifting doors. "These are to be expected though. They're the memories with Unohana, Shunsui and Ukitake. You've been thinking about them a lot today to start with, this conversation is just making it worse."
"Soyokaze, I don't...I don't want to think about it," Yukiko cried as tears leaked down her cheeks.
"Then say something to end the conversation," Soyokaze called back. "If you don't soon, they really will all break open."
"If it makes it easier, I'll simply ask you a question and you just have to answer yes or no." Unohana's voice brought Yukiko back to the real world and she met the squad captain's gaze despite her best efforts. After a moment or two, she silently nodded and Unohana began. "Did these illusions happen the entire time?"
"Yes," Yukiko murmured feeling a small portion of the stress ebb. Not having to actually state it herself seemed to be helping.
"Was it every other day?"
"No."
"Was it constant?"
There was a short pause before... "Yes."
"Did he inflict bodily harm on you?"
"S-sort of."
"So, he did so through someone else."
"Yes."
Unohana tapped her fingers against the table as she thought about her next question. By this point, the doors inside Yukiko's mind had been reduced to small shudders and she found herself almost relaxing.
"Did he do so through the member of the Gotei 13 that you are familiar with?"
The question had a greater impact than the young soul believed possible. Right away the same door suddenly shook violently and the one containing memories with Unohana splintered. "Y-yes," she stammered, each breath coming faster than normal.
"Did these images of them...of us, kill you?"
In an instant, the door burst and hundreds of memories flowed endlessly before Yukiko's eyes. Unohana standing before her with her sword about to devour her, Unohana laughing darkly behind her while a blade was visible from her chest.
"Yukiko..."
Unohana murmured the name guardedly as said soul reaper was shaking uncontrollably while one hand gripped the pommel of her sword. Her eyes had gone wide and glazed over. She was gasping now, her lips barely moving, and tears began sliding down each cheek.
"I...I can feel it," she whispered. "They're here...it's happening again." Her lips trembled as she squeezed her eyes shut. "I don't want to die...not again. No more...no more pain, no more fear. Please no more. Sousuke, help me."
Unohana was barely able to make out what the younger woman was muttering and knew she'd pushed it too far. She also knew she'd been right on the money. However, she could not afford to allow her to go on a rampage. So, she reached into her desk and pulled out a small syringe while signaling to her lieutenant for some assistance.
At the same time, Yukiko spotted the syringe and the grip she had on her sword tightened. She could see it so clearly, the syringe pressing gently into her skin while she was completely unable to fight back, followed by a numbing sensation while the older woman looked down at her coldly. Unohana was going to kill her...yet again.
She took several steps back trying to avoid the seemingly deadly object until she felt something wrap around her, keeping her from being able to move at all. Looking down she noticed a Bakudo # 61 keeping her still. She opened her mouth to scream, just as she noticed the sharp needle press into her skin. Then, all went black.
For Captain Unohana the next week was very informative as far as Yukiko's situation was concerned. While it was clear she was working very hard to improve herself, it was also clear she wasn't making very good progress. Over the next couple days, she visited Captain Ukitake and Captain Shunsui, both visits ending in her being knocked unconscious.
After those incidents she attempted to make sure that if she was ever required to be in the presence of someone she knew, it was with a new soul reaper present, just in case. The only bright side to all of this being that she hadn't actually attacked anyone yet, though the squad 4 captain could still remember the close call she herself had experienced.
The last time she set eyes on Yukiko, the young woman had bags under her eyes from obvious sleep deprivation. It was clear the stress she was under was slowly crushing her. The question now, was how much longer would her weakening strength hold out?
It was this very question that led the female captain to being in the squad 1 meeting room with Head Captain Yamamoto, Captain Ukitake, and Captain Shunsui. A final decision regarding her needed to be reached...now.
"Captain Unohana, what have you discerned about Yukiko's condition?" Yamamoto demanded.
Said captain shook her head despondently. "I'm afraid she is not doing well. The damage done to her mind is very extensive and although she is fighting to keep from having it affect her, she is failing in this endeavor."
"She did do alright during my visit for a time," Ukitake pointed out. "In fact it took an hour or so before she lost control. I believe it was when I brought out tea that she became greatly agitated."
"She lasted a little longer than that with me," Shunsui added. "Though what set her off in my case was a combination of the last question I asked her and Nanao walking in with a book in her hand. I think it brought up some rather terrible memories."
"What was the question?" Unohana asked curiously.
"If she knew what became of those eight," Shunsui answered. "I took the liberty of explaining it to her when she said no, before she started holding her head. Then my little Nanao entered and she retreated to the farthest corner she could from us and curled into a ball."
"That is a slight improvement at least," Unohana commented. "It sounds as if she has not attempted to attack anyone else yet."
"Regardless, it is clear that her actions are far too unpredictable with the sheer number of unknown triggers," Yamamoto cut in harshly. "We cannot allow this to continue."
"I agree, but I also believe that part of the reason she's having such a difficult time recovering is because of the amount of reiatsu here in the seireitei she recognizes," Unohana explained. "It is my belief that being able to sense our presence puts a constant strain on her mind and body. This makes it that much harder for her to keep herself under control."
"Well, that's not exactly something we can completely fix unless we isolate her," Shunsui pointed out.
"Did you have something in mind, Unohana?" Ukitake asked hopefully.
"After speaking with Captain Soi Fon, I believe the best place for her recovery would be the world of the living," Unohana answered calmly.
"Wouldn't that be handing her over to Aizen on a silver platter?" Shunsui murmured raising a confused eyebrow.
"If we left her to her own devices yes," she agreed. "However, under the indirect supervision of Youruichi and by staying near the substitute soul reaper she should have enough cover to avoid this outcome."
"It would be safer with them around, but I'm still failing to see why being over there would benefit her more," Ukitake murmured in concern.
"You see, we've all noted thanks to Ichigo's accompaniment for her report, she was able to recover from several would be episodes." Unohana smiled softly to herself as if laughing at her own personal joke.
"Yes, but what does this have to do with her going to the world of the living?" Yamamoto demanded.
"Because of the use of her nickname, Ume," the squad 4 captain continued. "She utilizes that here with the squad members that are new to her. The difference is, there are almost no energies there she recognizes. She should be able to utilize this different environment to allow her body and mind a chance to relax, which is something she cannot obtain here."
"Hmm...and how long would you suggest she be allowed to remain there?" Yamamoto asked slowly.
"Under normal circumstances, I'd say at least a year," she answered. "However, considering the issues we're having with Aizen, this would be a poor decision. Instead I would say until Aizen makes his move, or until she has a more functional mentality."
"That's a great plan and all," the squad 8 captain spoke up. "But what do you plan on doing if this doesn't work?"
"I've already spoken to Yukiko on this matter," Unohana answered. "She said that if she is unable to regain a descent level of functionality by the time Aizen attacks, she will voluntarily allow us to place her in the Maggot's Nest."
"She volunteered?" Ukitake exclaimed in alarm.
"Yes. She explained it by saying "I'd rather be locked up than used against the people I care about."," Unohana stated simply. "She's very aware that all of Aizen's actions seem to have been to distance her from us while attempting to solidify a more dependent attitude towards the three of them."
"So, instead of being used as a weapon against us, she plans on rotting away in that hell hole," Shunsui summed up shaking his head. It was a depressing conclusion but one he couldn't argue with. If she couldn't find a way to regain her former self, it would more than likely be their only option.
A heavy silence fell over the four captains as they contemplated the suggestion put out by the squad 4 captain. It really seemed like it was the only option, or at least the best one in their current situation. They were working towards fighting a war, after all, and couldn't afford to have such a large potential threat/distraction in the center of their strong hold.
Eventually Yamamoto knocked his walking stick/sword on the ground, causing a loud thud to echo through the otherwise silent room. "Very well, Yukiko will carry out the remainder of her recovery in the world of the living until Aizen begins to move. She will be under supervision of Youruichi Shihoin, Kisuke Urahara, and Tessai Tsukabishi. She will provide reports every weekend regarding her progress, and if no significant progress is obtained before this deadline she will be placed in the Maggot's Nest indefinitely."
Shippoman: And so, Yukiko prepares to head to the world of the living. Will this new living arrangement really help her or will she only get worse? She's back on the watch list with the stealth force and could be heading to the maggot's nest again. If so, this time it'll be of her own volition. Next chapter, Yukiko reunites with her new human friends and gets to see a few old ones as well. Remember to R&R as it always brightens my day and helps me write better.
Thanks Suzume Amai for all the psychological tips. I'll keep them in mind as I continue to write her development. Hopefully I can stay true to my vision while making it as believable as possible.