Today was a good day for Alex; she woke up at her normal time for the first time weeks. While she felt nauseous but didn't throw up, which is an improvement. She's in her 14th week, officially into her second trimester. As she was changing, she noticed a slight curve to her stomach. She is starting to show! She smiled happily as she ran her hand across it. Once she got dressed, she had an odd craving for a cinnamon roll for breakfast. She got her shoes on and headed towards Noonan's, taking the scenic route through the park. The park is on of her favorite spots in the city. There are always so many things going on from little league games, to concerts, people strolling around with families and friends, playing on the playground or eating a picnic by the pond. Alex was imaging what it would be like for her and her baby to be here when an excited puppy ran up to her, knocking her over. The puppy jumps on top of Alex and begins licking her.
"Woah easy there," Alex says trying to calm the puppy.
"GERTIE!" Someone yells causing Alex to tense up. Alex can pin point that voice from anywhere. A voice she hasn't heard in a long time but wishes she could.
"GERTIE GET BACK HERE!" The voice calls once more but the puppy refuses to listen, content with sitting on Alex's lap receiving pets. Alex looks to where the voice was coming from to see none other than Maggie herself. What she wasn't expecting was to see is Maggie crutching along with a large knee brace taking up most of her left leg.
"Maggie?" Alex manages to get out after opening and closing her mouth several times. Maggie looks just as beautiful if not more so. Her hair is a little longer but her skin is as flawless as ever.
"Alex?" Maggie says as she manages to crutch up next to her. They stare at each other for a while before Gertie interrupts then by licking Alex.
"I'm guessing this is your dog." Alex chuckles as the puppy continues to lick her.
Maggie rubs the back of her neck, "uh yeah I found her abandoned on the side of the highway in Metropolis. She didn't have any collar or chip and refused to leave my side. Besides she is really cute."
"Yeah you are, aren't you Gertie."
Maggie blushes at the name and at how awkward this is, "so you named her Gertie?"
"yeah."
Alex looks up to Maggie, "any chance it's short for Gertrude."
Maggie nods once more and Alex has to hold back the tears that threaten to poor over. She wants to ask why but feels it may be a touchy subject. Clearing her throat Alex asks, "I'm heading to Noonan's if you're hungry?"
Maggie hesitates for a moment staring into Alex's gorgeous brown eyes, "yea sure breakfast sounds nice, but we're going to have to walk slow."
Alex gets off the ground and holds Gertie's leash as the two make their way.
"Speaking of, how did you get hurt?"
"I was running after a guy after one of my rookie detectives let him loose and some guy in a scooter wasn't looking where he was going. I tore a bunch of ligaments and stuff in my knee. I had surgery a couple weeks ago and this the first time I'm actually able to get out of my apartment."
"From the looks of it Gertie must have been going crazy too."
Maggie laughs, a sound Alex hasn't heard in years. A sound she absolutely missed.
"Yeah well we've been here for a couple hours so she can run off all her pent up energy."
It was quiet the rest of the walk there. They sit outside so they don't have to tie Gertie to a tree.
"So you named her Gertie?" Alex asked cautiously.
"Yeah. I tried to think of another name but Gertie kept popping up in my head. I tried a bunch of names but she would only respond to that one so it stuck. I know you wanted to name your dog that I'm sorry."
"Hey there is no need to say sorry. You can name your dog anything you want. I'm just surprised considering how much you hated the name."
The waitress came over, "Hi my name is Amy and I'll be your server. Can I start you off with a drink?"
"I'll take an Americano please," Maggie orders. Alex makes note her usual hasn't changed.
"I'll take an herbal tea please." Alex orders leaving Maggie shocked. As the waitress leaves Maggie says, "tea Danvers. Ever since I've known you, you have never turned down coffee."
Maggie studies Alex a bit more before concluding, "you're pregnant."
Alex looks away and nods, "how did you know?"
Maggie smirks, "well besides the obvious no coffee, you're actually eating breakfast for once on your own and there are some physical changes as well," Maggie's last comment making Alex self-conscious, "you look good Alex, really good."
It makes no sense to Alex how easy and painful this is.
"Oh, congratulations by the way. You and your partner must be so happy."
Alex winces, "actually it's just me. There is no one else."
Maggie's surprised by that, "wow single mom, but you have your mom and the super friends right?"
"Yeah I do." Alex takes a moment before answering honestly, "I want to know if destroying everything had was for something. If I waited for someone to come into my life I felt like it would be too late by then. So I figured I could do it myself."
Maggie's throat constricts and has to look away. In the years that have past, Maggie hasn't stopped loving Alex. It got so painful she moved away to Metropolis to try and start over. After a year there and no change, Maggie went to therapy for the first time. It turns out she had a lot of issues that needed to be dealt with that she buried.
"I'm sorry." Maggie barely manages to get out.
Alex cocks her head, "you have nothing to be sorry for Mags." Maggie's heart constricting once more at the nickname.
Before they could continue, the waitress walked up with their drinks then took their food orders.
"Wow a cinnamon bun too Danvers."
Alex rolls her eyes and bites into it moaning at how delicious it tastes.
"Uh this is so good." Alex says as she bites into it again. She looks up to see Maggie frozen, staring at her.
"What?"
Maggie laughs, "nothing its just. You have something on your cheek." If this was a few years ago, Maggie wouldn't hesitate to lean over and lick it off herself but now circumstances are different.
Alex blushes and grabs a napkin, "thanks."
As they eat, they talk about several topics; the super friends, the DEO, Eliza, Kara, Metropolis.
Maggie's phone goes off, as they are about to leave, "Sergeant Sawyer," Maggie answers causing Alex jaw to drop.
"Yeah no leave them on my desk and tell Anderson to get the warrant for the Divine's apartment. We need to search that place ASAP before anything can be tampered with."
Maggie hangs up and looks to Alex who hasn't moved a muscle. Maggie waves her hand in front of Alex's face snapping her out of the trance.
"You're a Sergeant!"
"Yup got promoted shortly before I fucked up my knee."
"Wow Mags that amazing!"
"Thanks. At least one thing is going write in my life… well two if you count Gertie."
Alex stops in her tracks and looks at her feet.
"Alex what's…" Maggie goes to ask but Alex interrupts her, "I'm sorry Maggie. God I'm so sorry. I miss you so fucking much. These god damn hormones are not helping right now." Alex says wiping her eyes as tears fall. It breaks Maggie's heart to see Alex this way.
"I know. Do you know how messed up I was after we broke up. God I almost got fired because I stopped showing up for work," Maggie sighs, "look do you think we could finish this conversation in my apartment. My knee is starting to hurt and I really need to sit. Besides my building is only another block away. Although my aunt may be there, she decided to move to National City after I got hurt."
Alex nods and follows the two inside. Thankfully Maggie is only on the second floor.
As they enter, Alex looks around. This apartment is much more homey than her previous one.
"You have a nice place." Alex says as she walks to the couch.
"Thanks, have a larger salary comes with a bit of a bonus. Plus Aunt Val helps out a bit." Maggie sits on the other side of the couch putting her foot up on the coffee table, picking up the note her aunt left."
"Well I guess she will be out for a while." Maggie says reading the note.
Maggie takes a deep breathe before starting, "why do you think I named her Gertie really Alex because of you. God I missed you so much I ended up going to therapy." Maggie reads Alex's face and laughs because never in a millions years would Alex ever think Maggie would go to therapy.
"Yeah I know but honestly it was probably one of the best decisions I have ever made. I went for over a year before moving back here and it actually helped. It brought light to a lot of things I've been holding back and a bunch of problems I've ignored."
"That's good, I'm really glad to here that."
"It took a long time but I realized I sabotaged our relationship." Maggie admitted.
"What I know you Mags you would never do that."
Maggie held a hand up to stop Alex, "but I did. Throughout the time I was in therapy, the topic of kids was brought up a lot. For the longest time, I believed that I would be a terrible mom. That I wouldn't be able to handle the responsibilities and that a child would destroy my life. I kept denying that my parents had anything to do with it." Maggie pauses looking into Alex's eyes. It was almost as if there was a spark of hope in Alex's eyes.
"But in reality, they were a part of it, a big part. What kid would want a mom who was thrown out by there own parents? Plus, I never had a parent that I could look up to. Even before I was kicked out my parents weren't great, they had there moments but it was like they had to deal with me not love me. So I don't even know how to be a good mom, knowing me I'd fuck up real bad."
"Maggie.." Alex tried to interrupt but Maggie up her hand up.
"Let me finish please. Anyway, my therapist suggested I volunteer at the local youth center. I was hesitant at first but went anyway. Some of the kids I met, I mean they were amazing. There was this one little girl you would have loved her Alex. Her name is Sofia and she was about 3 when I met her. She was always to happy, kind of like a mini Kara. She came to the preschool every day, her mom would drop her off. I wasn't there everyday but the days I did see them together, there was always something off with her mom. It wasn't until Sofia missed school and came in the next day when I realized that her dad was abusing them. I tried to do everything I could but the mom refused to press charges."
Maggie wiped tears out of her eyes, "one night I got a call from some rookie cops about a domestic disturbance gone wrong, it was Sofia and her mom. I rushed to the hospital, but her mom didn't make it. The husband hit her so much and pushed her down the stairs to the point she bled to death internally. Sofia hid wasn't hurt thank god. The dad got arrested and social services came for Sofia. She was so scared Alex, she was shaking so bad and wouldn't stop crying. So I brushed my fears aside and picked her up, I held her as tight as I could and just rocked her back and forth. She eventually fell asleep but wouldn't let go of me. The social worker ended up giving me temporary custody of her until they could find her a foster home."
Alex pulled Maggie into a hug, "gosh Mags I'm so sorry you had to deal with that. Where is Sofia now?"
Maggie cleared her throat, "she's actually here in National City. She stayed with me for a couple months until they found a home for her in National City. It's not too far from here and I'm allowed to visit as much as I want. Those months though, with her, they made me realize that I was wrong. That I could be a mom and I'd be good at it. I mean if a little like Sofia could feel safe, protected and loved with me then I think I could do it. I'd just need the perfect partner to do it with, which is one of the reasons I moved back here."
Alex's heart felt like it was beating out of her chest, "Mags are you saying what I think you're saying?"
Maggie reaches up and caresses Alex's cheek, "yeah I am. I want a family with you Alex. I want all the first that we talked about and more. I know it took a while to be ready but I am. I know I've said a lot and it's really fast-." Alex shut Maggie up with a kiss.
"You needed to stop talking Mags," Alex said pulling away. She stared into Maggie's eyes seeing a new side of Maggie. A side that is confidant yet vulnerable, a side that is not shadowed by darkness and pain, but hope and happiness.
"Mags are you sure. I mean this is a really big change?" Alex wanted to be sure because Maggie was so adamant about not having kids before.
"Yeah I am. I'm still going to therapy here once every two weeks and the more time I spend with Sofia the more sure I am. I cannot wait to introduce you two, that is if you want to."
"Mags I would love nothing more than to meet this precious little girl that stole your heart. It's just this baby is coming in less than 6 months, which is not a lot of time to get to know each other again. I don't want us to get into something then it blowing up in our faces like it did before, I don't know if I can handle all the pain I've felt before with a baby to take care of."
Maggie cupped both of Alex's cheeks, "Alex I promise you this is what I want. We can take is slow okay. We can just hang out, it doesn't have to be anything serious and see where it goes."
Alex nodded sniffling, "I've really missed you Mags, not just as my partner but as my best friend."
Maggie pressed their foreheads together. They were so happy to finally be near each other again, to have each other back in each other's lives. They stayed like that for a while, until Alex's phone rang.
"Dammit," Alex's curses before answering the phone.
"Mom?"
"Hi sweetie I'm in town for the next couple days for a conference. I know it's short notice but I was hoping you, Kara and I could have a dinner together tonight."
"Uh sure. Kara's at 7 sound good?"
"Yes that's perfect. I'll see you then sweetie."
Alex hangs up the phone and stares at it for a while.
"You okay Alex?"
Alex looks up to Maggie, "yeah um, it's just after we broke up. My mom kinda, um, reverted back to old ways. She wasn't happy about us breaking up so it's been tense lately."
"I don't know if you know but she's been in contact with me since it happened. Not often but on holidays and my birthday she's called."
"I haven't told her about the pregnancy yet and honestly I'm scared to. What if she's not happy about it? What if she's disappointed in me some how?"
"If she is then she's wrong. Alex you are going to be the best mom on the planet, heck in the universe."
"I guess I better be going then. I have to cook dinner and its already 3."
Maggie looks at Alex like she has two heads, "wait you cook, really Danvers?"
"Hey I can cook now. Thanks to the dozens of lessons I've had. You'll see I'm a good cook now I promise and the fire alarm doesn't even go off anymore."
"Okay, okay I trust you."
Maggie walks, or rather crutches, Alex to the door, "Wanna get lunch some time this week?"
"Absolutely Sawyer." Alex said then hesitated not knowing if she should hug or kiss Maggie.
"Um can I kiss you good-bye?" Alex asked unsure.
"Yes, Danvers you can," Maggie responds with blushing cheeks. Alex leans down softly pressing her lips to Maggie's. As quickly as the kiss began, it ended. Alex didn't want to press her luck to far; after all they have only just reconnected.
"Bye Maggie."
"See you around, Danvers."