By the time we got out of the ocean, we were all pruney, and the sun was starting to touch the horizon. I'd filled the guys in on the particulars of training and what I hoped to achieve. They'd informed me of major clubbing hot spots where I'd find Strigoi and what to be looking for when we went shopping tomorrow.
They weren't all too thrilled about training with swords; they preferred their stakes, however, I convinced them that swords would be easier. If they didn't like the sword after a week of practice, they can go back to using their measly stakes.
As we were walking up the beach, up the path, and back toward the house, I smelt pizza and moaned as my stomach grumbled.
"Alright, Rose." Christopher chuckled but was somewhat serious. "You're going to have to not make those noises. I don't think you know what you do to the male population. I don't know about the rest of the Guardians, but I don't always hold my tongue like I should. One of these days you're going to moan like that and someone is going to comment. You're going to get us in trouble with either Pavel or your father, and right now I'm not sure who I should be more scared of, but I'm thinking it's Pavel."
"How can you be scared of Pavel? I understand your fear of my father, but Pavel is one of the sweetest men I've ever met." I said holding my hand to my heart as I took personal offense.
"He's the sweetest man you've ever met because you're like his niece, and he's extremely protective of you. He's not ever going to be strict and stern with you. Even when he starts training you, he's going to treat you like his niece. The rest of us, we're just Guardians, and he's the boss, well, the boss's right hand, and he makes sure we know it." Jasper said. Kyle was nodding in agreeance, and Christopher just pointed at Jasper as if to say 'Yeah, what he said.'
"Well, I guess that just sucks for you guys. If it makes you feel any better, I'll probably be just as tough on you in training as Pavel will be." I said with a grin as we entered the house.
"I don't think that makes us feel any better," Christopher mumbled.
"In the kitchen, Rose." I heard Pavel call. I followed my nose and the sound of Pavel's voice into the kitchen, not bothering to change out of my bikini, but taking the time to pull on my coverup.
"It smells fantastic in here," I said before I spotted a mountain of pizza boxes. "Which is which?"
"That side is all meat," Pavel said pointing to my right before gesturing to my left. "This side has some sort of vegetable on it."
I ignored Pavel's laugh as I went directly for the all meat boxes and grabbed one for myself.
"Woah, Rose, do you think you can eat all of that?" One of the Guardians called from the dining room.
"I don't think I can eat all of this by myself. I know I can eat all of this by myself, but if I can't, I'll let you know." I said with a smirk and moved into the living room area. The couches are much more comfortable, and I'm not surrounded by eight men, just three, and these three I actually liked.
"Do you want to see who can finish their box the fastest?" Jasper asked bouncing up and down in his spot on the couch opposite me.
"I'm going to pass, Jas," I said with a chuckle as Kyle backed out as well. "But you and Christopher are more than welcome to compete. I'll be here afterward to take care of you when you inevitably give yourselves massive stomach aches."
Jasper and Christopher dug into their pizzas, committing themselves to future stomach pain. Kyle and I sat back, leisurely eating our pizzas, watching in amusement. I was just starting on my third slice when Jasper began on his last, Christopher was half a slice behind him. I leaned forward anxious to see the winner. Jasper was inhaling his slice, a little too literally. He started coughing but pushed through to finish his slice, but not before Christopher.
Christopher raised both his arms in victory but groaned as his stomach stretched. Jasper recovered his breath, and both fell back into the couch holding their stomachs and groaning. The whole event took five minutes.
"How do you guys feel?" I asked with a smirk, finishing off my third slice.
"We should have listened to you." Jasper groaned, and I laughed.
"What's so funny, Kiz?" Baba asked when he entered with a couple slices of pizza on a plate.
"These two," I began gesturing to the pained Guardians, "decided it would be a wonderful idea to have a pizza eating contest, and while it was amusing to watch, it only succeeded in giving them a stomach ache."
"What gave you two the hint that it was a good idea to inhale greasy pizza so quickly?" Baba asked amused.
"It sounded like a good idea at the time." Christopher groaned. "I regret nothing."
"I regret something." Jasper groaned beside him.
"As long as you guys are prepared to go shopping tomorrow," I said with a smirk. "I plan to make it a full day affair." Kyle snickered beside me as he began his last slice of pizza. While he didn't take part in the speed-eating contest, he did devour his food rather quickly. I was only half done. "Did you conduct any phone interviews, Baba?"
"A couple. While you are out shopping tomorrow, I'm flying a few in to conduct in-person interviews, though I think I've found a perfect fit." He said with a smile.
"Does he know it will be you he'll be working for?" I asked with a chuckle.
"Yep, but I don't think he minds," Baba responded with a similar chuckle. Involuntarily, I let out a yawn. "You've had a busy day, Kiz. Sydney will be here early in the morning. Go get a good night's sleep so you have a fun-filled day of shopping."
I finished my pizza, kissed Baba goodnight, and dropped my empty pizza box in the middle of the dining table, stunning the Guardians, but ignored them as I climbed the stairs to my room. I took a quick shower to wash the salt water off my skin but was soon crawling into my comfy bed.
Out of pure, instinctual habit, I checked in on Lissa. I had expected her to be with Christian or Adrian, however, I wasn't all too surprised to see that she was with Dimitri. They were in her room talking. My heart lurched a little as I took in his face. He looked as if he hadn't slept in three days, which I supposed could be a very big possibility.
His eyes, which in the church held fire and anger, were now cold and lifeless. His hair hung limply around his face, and his skin was paler than usual.
"Dimitri, you need to eat." Lissa pleaded weakly, it sounded like it wasn't the first time.
"I'm not hungry, Princess. I'll eat later." Came the robotic response.
"I know you miss her," Lissa said softly but missed Dimitri's flinch. "I miss her, too."
"I'm sorry, Princess, but I can't say that I miss her," Dimitri said, his face contorting in pain as he said the words. Suddenly, I could see his aura, and I'm pretty sure it wasn't Lissa's doing.
The air around him was filled with a smoky black, swirling with a dark gray. There wasn't a splash of color anywhere. Against my better judgment, I breathed deep and willed his pain into myself. I felt my power increase and watched in amazement as his aura lightened and swirled with blues and greens.
His eyes widened.
"Princess, what did you do?" He asked breathlessly.
"Me? I didn't do anything." Lissa said shocked. "Why? What happened?"
"I feel different, better, happier," Dimitri said with furrowed eyebrows.
"Rose," Lissa whispered, almost quiet enough to where Dimitri didn't hear, but being the Guardian that he is, he heard.
"What about Rose?" He asked a little harshly, to which Lissa flinched.
"Adrian noticed it yesterday. I thought she could only do it with other Spirit users, but she can apparently do it to anyone who is feeling down." Lissa said, the wheels in her head still spinning.
"Do what?" Dimitri asked taking a step closer to Lissa.
"She can take the Darkness. Everyone's Darkness. Any negative emotion, any negative thought, she can take it. She said she can control it now." Lissa finished with a whisper.
"Are you sure? She's not hurt, is she? Can you talk to her? Is she okay?" Dimitri asked in a rush.
"I thought you didn't miss her," Lissa said crossing her arms over her chest and narrowing her eyes at Dimitri.
"I lied. Now, tell me, is she okay?" He asked taking a small step forward.
"Rose, are you okay?" Lissa's voice came through.
"I'm fine, Liss, but don't tell him that," I responded with a sigh.
"She said no," Lissa told Dimitri. I watched his face fall, but instead of feeling peace knowing that he was in pain, I felt my chest tighten and tears spring in my eyes.
"Where is she?" He asked quietly, his voice breaking slightly.
"I'm not telling either of you where I am," I told Lissa before she could ask me herself.
"She's not telling me. She doesn't want to be found. She doesn't want to see us. She definitely doesn't want to come back to Court." With each sentence, Dimitri flinched, his eyes turning glassy with tears that he tried to hold back.
"I understand." He said quietly, slowly backing away from Lissa. "However, if she's staying away from Court because of me, tell her that I'll be leaving soon."
"Leaving?" I asked, curiosity getting the better of me.
"Where are you going?" Lissa asked, curious herself.
"I'm going to find myself. I'll visit home for a bit before finding a job anywhere but Court." He said. Only then did I notice a duffle placed near the door. He picked it up and slung it over his shoulder. "I'm due to leave in an hour."
"Will you be back?" Lissa asked a little hurt.
"Probably not. There are more than enough Guardians here to keep you safe, Princess." Dimitri responded, his normal Guardian mask in place, though I could see the pain in his eyes.
"I don't want other Guardians, Dimitri. Rose asked for you specifically to protect me, and since she's not here herself, you're the best thing I have."
"Add it to my long list of failures when it comes to doing what Rose wants of me," Dimitri muttered before heading out the door. I didn't stick around in Lissa's head after the door slammed shut.
My body had sunken into the mattress and was being cradled softly, relaxed. However, unlike my body, my mind was racing, working overtime to figure out why Dimitri would leave Court. It couldn't be because of me, I wasn't there anymore. He was starting to become accepted as a Guardian again, so it wasn't like he didn't have a job. He wasn't too keen on seeing his family after he was restored, but I don't know what could have changed his mind.
I pulled myself out of bed, my mind too frantic to even attempt sleeping, now. I pulled the curtains covering my windows back and looked out over the glass black water. I could faintly hear the waves crashing on the sand. The lights of the far harbor were reflected softly on the moving surface.
The outside world was calm, but inside me was a raging storm. The Darkness I'd taken from Dimitri was different from the Darkness I'd taken from Adrian and Lissa. There was something different about this Darkness. It was more powerful, almost all-consuming. I couldn't possibly fathom what it must have felt like to Dimitri.
I decided that I needed to rid myself of some of it in order to sleep, so I pulled on some shorts and a tank top and made my way down to the gym. As suspected, the gym was empty. It was nearly two in the morning, the middle of the day for Moroi, but the middle of the night for everyone else.
I went over to the panel Baba had shown me earlier and pushed on it. The wall drew back and revealed the scanner. I bent down slightly to bring my right eye in line with the laser and waited while the red light completed its scan. There was a soft beep followed by two harsher beeps. I looked down to see a hole glowing red, indicating that I needed to put my finger there.
I inserted my finger into the hole and jumped a little at the sudden prick. I knew it was coming, so I shouldn't have been all that surprised, but that didn't stop the gasp that escaped my mouth or the involuntary sudden withdrawal of my finger. I sucked off the bead of blood that had pooled on my fingertip as the secret door opened.
I walked to the table that held my weapons and picked up my Scimitar. I placed the harness around myself and placed the scabbard of the Khopesh on my waist. I moved back into the gym, making sure to close the door to the weapons room.
I didn't plan on using the swords, just getting used to how they sat on my back and side and how to move with them. I moved over to the punching bags and dropped myself into a fighting stance. I released the first punch and watched the bag swing violently. I hadn't realized that I could pack that much power into one punch.
I didn't want to have to be dealing with a swinging bag during my pummeling, so I moved over to a dummy. The dummies were meant to have similar characteristics as a Strigoi. They were hard and heavy, a skeletal system was built into them, giving you practice with avoiding bones or breaking them.
When my fist made contact with the hard rubber, I breathed a sigh of relief. It was a pleasant pain that caused my entire body to relax. The subsequent hits felt just as good, and I started to get into a rhythm. I was so focused on beating the thing bloody, not that there was actual blood, that I didn't notice someone else had entered the room until I felt a hand on my shoulder.
I pivoted to my left slightly, grabbing the hand that had attached itself to my shoulder. I reached back and grabbed the forearm of the person and bent forward, slinging their arm in front of me, causing the rest of the body to follow.
The body landed with a thump and a groan. I knelt down and leaned over the person, fist pulled back ready to strike when I finally saw who I'd thrown over my shoulder.
"Christopher? What are you doing down here?" I asked quickly. I sat back on my heels as Christopher pulled his body off the ground with a loud groan.
"I live down here." He replied. "After Guardian Nelson vacated the premises, I was moved down here. Jasper and Kyle were already down here, and Pavel thought it was a good idea to have us all together, easier to wake us for practice if need be."
"Are you three the only ones down here?" I asked him, switching my seating position to a half-lotus.
"Yep, but I don't see how those two slept through the sounds you were making." He said with a smirk.
"Sounds?" I asked trying my best to lift an eyebrow. I think I managed it slightly, if I didn't, Christopher didn't say anything about it.
"Yeah, you were almost screaming with fury as you were punching that dummy. I called out to you several times before resorting to contact. I knew if I touched you I'd be dealt a little pain." He said with a wink. I rolled my eyes at him.
"Sorry about that. I didn't realize I was making so much noise." I said looking down at my hands. They were bloody.
"Jesus, Rose!" Christopher cried when he looked down. "What did you do?"
"I was just punching the thing," I said calmly and watching in amazement as the wounds closed slowly. We both stayed silent, but when I looked up at Christopher, his eyes were wide and his jaw agape.
"How'd you do that?" He whispered, still staring at my hands.
"I don't know," I admitted.
"Are you two okay in here?" Kyle asked hesitantly from the doorway. I turned to look over my shoulder and saw him and Jasper standing there, their stakes in hand though they hung by their sides.
Only then did I realize that all three of them were shirtless. I'd seen better. I mean, it's hard to beat a well-toned Russian, but they were still nice to look at.
"Yeah, we're good," I said.
"Speak for yourself. My shoulder is going to be sore for a few days." Christopher grumbled with a smile.
"Maybe you shouldn't sneak up on a girl who is going hard at a dummy," I said with a smirk.
"Speaking of which, why were you going so hard at said dummy?" Christopher asked cocking his head to the side.
"I had some emotions I needed to burn off," I answered.
"Pretty strong emotions if you ask me," Jasper said as he and Kyle moved over and sat on either side of me.
"What's his name?" Kyle asked after I'd only nodded in response. I looked up at him in surprise, but he only gave me a look that told me it'd just be easier if I told them.
"Dimitri," I said quietly looking down at my hands.
"Is he the reason you came here? The reason you left Court?" Jasper asked gently.
"Partially. He was the only thing keeping me there. My best friend had started to drift from me. She didn't enjoy that I wanted to spend more time with him than with her. Her relationship with her own boyfriend was on the rocks, her own doing, and she blamed it on me because I left to help Dimitri."
"Did you help him?" Jasper asked.
"I did," I responded.
"Then why aren't you with him?" Kyle asked confused.
"Because he didn't want me there anymore. He didn't want me. He made sure that I knew it, too." I said closing my eyes, trying to keep the tears at bay as my voice broke.
"What did he do?" Christopher asked, his hands curling into fists.
"He told me 'Love fades. Mine has.'" The tears I'd not been able to shed in that moment were coming forward now. "I'd done so much for him. I'd risked my life numerous times, broken the law at least once, and somehow accomplished the impossible. I did it all for him but all for nothing because he didn't want me."
They all stayed quiet as the tears rolled silently down my face. Kyle was the first to move, wrapping his arms around me as I started to sob. I felt someone, probably Jasper, ease my weapons off my body as the tears kept coming.
The pain that had been absent the past two days was now making itself known and with interest. One of Kyle's hands rubbed my shoulder gently while the other soothed my hair. I'd buried my face in his neck as my sobs continued. I felt two more hands rub my back gently.
My body felt drained and my mind tired. Slowly my eyes stopped producing tears and my chest released some pressure. I felt my body slump against Kyle as my mind filled with drowsiness. I couldn't open my eyes, and I barely recognized the feeling of being lifted as I fell into unconsciousness.
I thought sleep would be my solace, my safe haven, but I was wrong. I was so very wrong. My mind was tormented by dreams of Dimitri ripping my heart out of my chest. I'd had similar dreams in my time over in Russia, but those were always of a Dimitri with blood-red eyes. The Dimitri that was pale and cruel, heartless. This Dimitri lacked the feeling of death. His eyes were a chocolate brown, his skin was tan, but he was still delivering the final blow.
There were variations of what the Dream-Dimitri did to me, sometimes he'd cut my heart out with his stake, sometimes he'd rip it out with his bare hands. However, in all of the dreams, he'd tell me the same thing, only this thing wasn't imagined: "Love fades. Mine has."
The words played on repeat as the various death scenarios ran through my mind, whispers in the back of my head. I tried running from him. I tried hiding from him. I tried pleading with him, telling him that I love him, but nothing worked. On the seventh iteration of my death, I stood still and let it happen, hoping that my acceptance would make it stop. On the tenth iteration, I cut my own heart out and gave it to him, hoping he'd change his mind if I gave it to him willingly, but he dropped it on the ground and squashed it under his foot.
It didn't matter what I did, he never wanted my heart. No matter what I did, no matter what I told him, no matter how much I pleaded with him, he was still going to kill me; and I let him.