HOOKTAIL interviews KOOPS
By Denny W. Koopa
Denny: Hey! I'm Denny,
Denny Jr: And I'm Denny Jr!
Denny: Today I will be interviewing-
Deep Voice: Excuse me!
Denny: Knock first!
SMASH!
Voice: Would you like 1,000 coins?
Denny: Only silver dollars-
Voice: Sand dollars-
Denny Jr: OKAY!
Denny: WAIT! Sand dollars aren't worth anything…
(Hooktail, the voice, swallows.)
Cameraman: You'll have to interview Koops.
Hooktail: Fine…
(Koops walks in, then walks out backwards.)
Koops: Sorry! Forgot to, um, comb the rug!
Hooktail: Not so fast!
Koops: OKAY! JUST DON'T KILL ME!
Hooktail: Fine, fine…
Koops: HEY! I know you! Gimme back my MOM TOO! And maybe my blankie if you wanna…
Hooktail: How much do I get paid for this?
Cameraman: Enough to pay for the damage you caused.
Hooktail: Well, first question: How's life for you?
Koops: Oh, it's horrible… My beak hurts, my shell is dirty, I forgot tissues, the whole world is coming to an end!
Hooktail: Sounds exciting. So, did you like being with Mario?
Koops: No, what you didn't see is, in all the warp pipes, he got stuck.
Hooktail: What did you think of your other friend, Goombella?
Koopie Koo: ARGH!
Koops: Umm, I hated her, she wouldn't stop talking and she made fun of me. (Phew!)
Hooktail: So what's your town, Petalburg, like?
Koops: Do you mean before you destroyed half of it?
Hooktail: SHH!
Koops: Well, it used to have a school and a museum of great Koopas, but now, it is just a relaxing place to hang around. We have a shop and an inn, and the rest is residential.
Hooktail: Well, now we have to answer a series of questions. And hurry (so I can go home) or else! Now what's your favorite food, sport, Koopa Kid, video game, show, and type of music?
Koops: Well, I like Turtley Leaves, I play lacrosse and hide and seek, Morton helps me take naps, Kirby is fun, I watch the Amazing Race, explains why I get heart attacks at 11 PM every Tuesday, and I listen to the blues.
Hooktail: Now what are your least favorite of those subjects?
Koops: I'm not a big fan of hotdogs, soccer games can be long, Roy scares me, Mario stomps and kicks me in his titles, cartoons confuse me, and rap has scary people and bad words.
Hooktail: Questions from the audience! Seat 500!
Smithy: Guess what I got!
Mario: A machine head!
(Mario plays air guitar.)
Luigi: Just what we need, Mario games with rock music…
(Mario grabs a KISS mask out from under his chair.)
Koops: Mario! Go get a dictionary!
Mario: NO! Why do I always get in trouble?
Hooktail: Actual questions? Seat 22.
Mario: What page number?
Koops: Uh... ALL OF 'em!
Hooktail: I'll spit out your Mom if you can help us defeat Mario!
Koops: Sure!
Hooktail: Seat 83!
Blooper: What was you favorite place to visit?
Koops: Rogueport was kind of cool, but vacation-wise, I took a trip and hiked up Shiver Mountain! It was cool.
Hooktail: Well, I'll go to the doctor's and see how to get your mother out, and maybe the interviewers too. I can't go through this again!
Disclaimer: I don't own these entries. They belong to their respective owners. Mario is owned by Nintendo.