Chapter 7

"I'm thinking about going to that street bazar on Saturday if it doesn't rain. Would you like to come with me?"

"Oh, um." Kate pressed the phone tighter against her ear as she tried to formulate the best response to her mother's invitation. "No; I can't. I have lunch plans and then—I, um, yeah. I have plans."

"Oh? That sounds cryptic."

"It's not." Kate spoke a bit too quickly. Then, she squeezed her eyes tight and huffed out a breath. In her mind's eye she could see her mother's arched eyebrow an intrigued expression. They weren't even in the same room yet somehow Johanna was prying the truth out of her. Then again, maybe Kate was just looking for an excuse to tell someone about the plans she had been excited about for nearly a week.

"I'm having lunch with Castle."

Johanna's voice rang with both excitement and intrigue when she next spoke. "Really?"

"No—don't; don't make a big deal out of this." Kate warned.

"I'm not making a big deal, but if it's your first date with Castle we should at-"

"No," Kate jumped in; her voice firm. "It's not a date; we're just two friends having lunch."

Johanna was silent for ten seconds before saying. "I see. It's not a date."

"Right."

"Because he said so?"

"N-no. I mean, we never talked about it being a date. He just…we were talking about this restaurant and he asked if wanted to eat there with him Friday night, but I work, so we changed it to Saturday lunch."

"That sounds suspiciously like a date to me."

Kate grumbled at her mother's insistence. "It's not! We—we're not dating; it's not a date."

"Fine; not a date, but what if during said non-date, he asks you out again, that time making it clear that your next outing would be a date?"

"I…well, I mean, I…I suppose that would be okay."

"Katie!" her mother said in a half-scolding, half-laughing tone.

"What?!"

"You're being silly."

"Silly? No. Careful." She corrected. Then, after picking at a thread poking out from the seam on her jeans for a moment she continued. "I'm just being careful because he makes me a little nervous."

"Why? He's not dangerous."

"Not that kind of nervous just the…" She rubbed her fingers over her brow, trying to put into words the jumble of feelings inside her chest, but it was nearly impossible. "The way I feel when I'm with him is…it's confusing and unsettling because sometimes…well, there are just these moments when I think that he—but then I'm not actually sure if he… yet there are these other times… There are other times when I'm positive he could just step in and sweep me off my feet and I…wouldn't stop him."

"That's a good thing."

"It's nerve-wracking," she said, thinking specifically about the dreams she had when Castle would grab her, kiss her, run his hands down the length of her body and… "Stupid," she commented more to herself than anything. "I shouldn't let him unnerve me but…well, I haven't felt like this since high school and I'm trying to get used to it again."

"I'm sure you are, and there's nothing wrong with that, but…you will give him a chance, won't you?"

"Yes," she confirmed, finally acknowledging her interest for the writer out loud. "Yes—assuming he's interesting in more than just a fling. I want a relationship or at least something heading in that direction. Something that's not disposable."

"I'd say there's a pretty decent possibility of that."

"Probably."

"Oh, Katie; I'm so happy for you! You'll let me know how it goes, won't you?"

Kate chuckled. "Of course. And thanks," she added, knowing that if her mother had not talked some sense into her in the very beginning, she might never have given Castle the chance he deserved, and that would have been a terrible mistake.

"I still don't understand how you managed to get a cow on the roof of your high school." Kate shook her head with disbelief, still amazed at some of the wild stories Castle had told her during their ninety-minute lunch.

He grinned as they stood from their seats and made their way towards the exit. "As I said, Beckett, anything is possible if—oh." He stopped just a few feet from the door and made a face. "Was it supposed to rain today?"

Kate gazed around him to see a light rain falling outside and grumbled as she had not brought a coat; neither of them had, actually. "I didn't think it was supposed to rain until late afternoon. Crap."

"Well…It's only two and a half blocks to my place. Mostly under awnings. Want to make a run for it?"

"I…" Kate hesitated. She had been about to suggest calling for a cab, but without knowing how long it had been raining, cabs may have been scarce, which meant they could be waiting upwards of half an hour, which seemed silly, especially with his apartment being so close. She also thought about sending him home and waiting for the cab herself, but they had just been discussing her looking at the preliminary cover art for his Nikki Heat novel, and she really wanted to see that. Ultimately, she shrugged and said, "Why not? It doesn't look like it's raining that hard."

And it wasn't—when they left the restaurant. By the time they reached the end of the block, however, the precipitation had increased steadily. In fact, by the time they should have been within eyesight of Castle's five-story building, it simply could not be seen due to the torrents of rain. Naturally, when they splashed up to his building's awning the deluge began to slow, but it was too late; they were already drenched.

Despite being very wet—and cold—Kate could not stop herself from laughing along with Castle. She could not remember the last time she had run through the rain, and while she would have preferred a summer rain to a fall one, she couldn't say she was mad. It had been exhilarating, just like their lunch together.

For the duration of their meal Castle had been just as funny, charming, and kind as she had hoped he would be—even more so. Gone was the overly flirtatious mystery writer intent on cracking jokes and being the center of attention. He was replaced by a sweet, genuine man, who listened with as much intensity as he told stories. More and more he was becoming the type of man she could see herself with—as scary and exciting as that was—which was why she was in no hurry to end their afternoon together.

"Oh my god, I'm just drenched, but it's mostly my blazer. You're soaked."

Kate looked down at herself and noticed how saturated her pants were at the ankles and on her upper thighs. Her shirt was also completely soaked, though since it was a dark green color it—thankfully!—had not become too sheer. Still, she knew she would not want to sit around in such damp clothing for too long.

As though he'd read her thoughts, he said, "You know I bet if we pop your shirt and pants into the dryer, it won't take more than twenty or thirty minutes for them to be dry again."

"Oh." She felt slightly taken aback by his suggestion, but it wasn't unwelcome. "Um, yeah. Sure. I, um, do you have a robe or something I can wear while we wait?"

"T-shirt and pajama pants?" he offered.

She smiled softly. "Even better."

Kate waited patiently while Castle hurried into his bedroom and returned a moment later with the promised clothes. She stepped into the small bathroom off the entry-way to change, only fully coming to the realization that she was wearing his clothes when she caught her reflection in the mirror. The shirt was large and baggy and the pants would have fallen off were it not for the drawstring, but they were definitely comfy. She was startled once again by that thought. She definitely did not get comfy with anyone other than her mother too often. Sure, she would wear yoga pants around her childhood friend Maddy if they were having a night in. And she certainly didn't make any effort to dress up if she was going to visit Lanie, but somehow with a man—with Castle—it felt different; it felt like opening the door to something new, something she definitely was not opposed to even if they still technically were not on a date.

With her wet clothes in hand, she stepped out of the bathroom and saw that he had also changed into a different pair of pants. They were still jeans, but they definitely looked more faded and well-worn. He ushered her towards a room just off the kitchen that ended up being the largest laundry area she'd ever seen in a Manhattan apartment. After her clothes were in the dryer, Castle beckoned her back through the kitchen and across the apartment to his office, where he finally showed her the preliminary cover art for his new book. Kate had barely held it in her hands for more than two seconds when her chest tightened with concern—and annoyance.

"Castle is she…is she naked?" Prominently on the cover was the silhouette of a woman with a gun drawn. With her breasts and backside so prominently drawn it looked suspiciously like she wore nothing at all. Considering her already salacious sounding name, Kate was not sure she was a fan of this portrayal for the character she inspired.

"Naked? Maybe. It's up to the readers imagination. Looks great, right? Right now we're aiming for a release early next year."

She handed the picture back as she asked, "Really? I didn't realize you were that far along."

He bobbed his head. "Sent off the final chapters a few days ago, so now the editing process beings. Sorry—I thought I mentioned it."

She shook off his apology. "Is…is this normally how publishing works? This quickly?"

He shrugged and sat on the very edge of his desk. "Sometimes; it really depends. Back in the hay day of Derrick Storm, I would be writing the books practically back-to-back, so there would be more lag time between when I finished writing a book and when it actually made it to store shelves. Now, since it's been nearly a year since I published anything, Black Pawn wants my next book on the market as soon as possible so I don't lose momentum with my fanbase."

"Ah yes, the fanbase."

He let out a breathy laugh and skimmed his hand over his forehead. "Yeah. I don't…It's not that I don't appreciate those who buy every one of my books—of course I do. I certainly wouldn't be here without them. I just…well, I don't do it for them. I enjoy writing. It's a passion I've been fortunate enough to turn into a career. I would keep doing it if my books were read by five people or five thousand. There was definitely a time back in the day when I wanted a weekly report of how many copies I sold, but—as difficult as this may be to believe—I've matured past that."

Her lips curled upwards as she said, "I believe it." She then dipped her chin and a chunk of damp hair fell into her face. She went to bush it back, but he beat her to it.

"Gosh, I'm sorry—I didn't realize how wet your hair got. Would you like to use my hair dryer? Or I can get you a towel…"

"No, no; I'm fine. It's drying."

"You're sure?"

"Mmhmm."

"Okay, well, um, do you want to sit?" He gestured towards the padded bench in front of the windows in his office. "I always like to watch the rain; it's peaceful."

She walked over and they sat on opposite sides of the bench, half facing one another, half turned towards the rain-soaked window. Kate lifted her hand to trace her fingertip down one of the raindrop paths. As she felt as though she was always on the go, Kate did not often take the time to watch the rain outside her window; usually she was far too busy. On the rare occasion that she did spend a rainy day inside her apartment, she was never by the window. Her apartment only had two windows, and both were very small, thus sitting in front of them and watching the rain would have been an awkward if not impossible endeavor.

"Hey, you okay? You seem a little sad."

She turned her head to face him and gave a guilty shrug, as her thoughts had turned to the past. "I was thinking about my dad, actually. The last time I watched the rain like this we were together; it was during our last vacation together as a family."

"Just before he died?" Castle asked.

"A few months—August, just before school started. My…my father had this cabin in the woods upstate that he bought with a bunch of his law school buddies. He would go there a few times a year, spend the weekend and recharge. My mom and I didn't go too often, but we all went that time. I…didn't have the best attitude about it, you could say," she confessed with a sheepish expression. "Typical teenage girl, I suppose. Plus, I never liked the woods and I had no interested in fishing in the small lake nearby; I thought I was going to be horribly bored."

"Were you?"

"I was a little bored for sure but…in the middle of the trip it rained for two days straight—absolutely poured, kind of like what we ran through today. We were all cooped up in the cabin, getting a little restless, and my father found some board games one of his buddies had left. Some were little kid games like Candy Land, but there was also Monopoly. We played those games and…and it ended up being really, really fun. I don't think my parents and I had played a game in years before that, but it was good. Of course, I had no way of knowing then it would be the last vacation we ever took together, but looking back… "She sighed and gave him a half-smile. "It's both a happy and sad memory, I suppose."

"You were…sixteen?"

"I was fifteen during that trip; turned sixteen that November."

He gave her a sad smile. "Rough age to lose a parent."

"Yeah, it would have been, but this was…everyone."

"Tell me about it."

She shook her head as she tried to imagine what it would have been like for him. They had talked about it before, though only briefly. She knew that he had been one of the few entirely immune to the wide-spread disease; he had never been sick at all. The context of the discussion had been centered around his inaugural book, In a Hail of Bullets. Evidently, his book had been accepted by Black Pawn just months before the incident, and he was concerned that in the wake of everything that happened afterwards, he would not be published at all, but ultimately the release was just delayed. Still, he'd chosen to publish under the name R. Castle so as not to draw any further notoriety or intrigue simply because he was male.

"I can't imagine what losing all your friends would have been like," Kate said a moment later.

"Yeah, it…it wasn't easy. Losing friends was rough but…but I'd encountered that a lot in my childhood. As you probably noticed from my stories over lunch, I could be quite a handful as a child, so I moved schools several times and had to start over socially. That, I was used to. It was…not just the attention, but the shock of it. In the immediate aftermath I felt like I was the last of an endangered species from the way I was stared at on the street. People came up to me and—and…well, you wouldn't believe the things I heard. It was… a lot to get used to."

"I can imagine," she said, thinking of how the few males left in her high school were treated once all the dust settled. "It was a crazy thing to live through and I think we all struggled with it in our own ways; no one was immune."

"Definitely, but you know I'm here; I survived. I have a daughter, a home, a great life…can't complain," he added with one of his classic dopey smiles.

She laughed softly. "Yeah. Even though that disease didn't infect any women, I think we all feel a little bit lucky to have survived. I…" she hesitated a moment to continue. "That was such a rough time for everyone, but every time the memory of it becomes too crushing, I remember this one guy in my grade. You know, in hind sight, he reminds me a little of you."

His eyes brightened. "Yeah?"

She nodded. "Right when the disease started, he said his goal was to kiss as many girls as possible before he got sick too, so he ran through the halls of the school trying to kiss all the girls in our grade—and the one below."

The writer gasped. "Oh my god—why didn't I try that?!"

"It was terrible!"

"Did he get in trouble?"

"Of course."

"Did he kiss you?"

She shook her head. "I wouldn't let him; I had a boyfriend."

His brow rose notably. "Oh, so you have kissed before."

Flustered to the point where she knew her cheeks were turning pink, she stammered, "I—wha-of course!" She felt herself growing even more embarrassed while thinking that he might have actually thought she never kissed anyone for the duration of their partnership—how embarrassing!

"Sorry for assuming, but I wasn't sure given how young you were." He let a beat go by before asking. "Have you kissed anyone since?"

"I kissed a woman once during a college party."

To his credit, he did not overreact or make any appropriate jokes. Instead, he maintained an appropriate level of curiosity as he asked, "And?"

She scrunched her nose and shook her head. "Not my thing." Seeing as there was a distinct lack of men, she and nearly all her friends had done some same-sex experimenting, but even with the lowered inhibitions alcohol provided, Kate had not been interested in exploring a relationship of that nature.

The writer studied her for a moment before asking, "What if I said I wanted to kiss you now?"

Kate had thought she had maxed out her embarrassment until she felt flames against her cheeks once again. Never before had anyone actually asked to kiss her; it had always just happened. Considering their status as quasi-coworkers turned friends, she supposed she didn't mind the formality of it all, though for some reason it did make the butterflies in her stomach more aggressive. "I suppose that would be ok."

Without waiting a second, Castle scooted closer to her, leaned in, and pressed his lips gently against hers. Their first kiss was brief, with Castle pulling back an inch until their noses bumped together, giving them both a chance to acclimate to the new feelings. Then, he moved back towards her, giving her one, two, then three soft kisses. Then, his hands skimmed beneath her jaw and he drew her in, parting his lips around hers and sending sparks down her spine.

Kate grabbed on to his forearms for support when she began to feel lightheaded. Only then did she realize she'd forgotten to breathe, so she sucked in a breath only to have it come out as a soft moan. When she heard the noise and realize it had come from her mouth, she pulled back and hissed out loud, "Shit."

Concern danced across his face. "What?"

"That was way better than I thought it was going to be."

He chuckled deeply, bumped his nose against hers again, and said, "You're welcome."

She threw her arms around his neck and pulled him in closer. "Shut up."

Kate kissed him again and again, feeling utterly lost in the feeling of his soft lips against hers, and his strong hands gripping at the flesh on her waist and hips. She hadn't realized how much she missed making-out, or, hell, just being close to someone, until her body was humming, every fiber feeling like it was about to burst into flames. Knowing she needed to take a moment before she unconsciously began trying to undress him, she slid a few inches away and gave him a soft smile.

Thankfully, he took the hint, and moved some hair off her brow before brushing his thumb against the hollow of her cheek. "So…is this a thing now?" he asked softly.

"What do you mean by thing?"

"Are we dating?"

That time, she felt her whole body flush at the word. "Dating? I… I mean…" Yes, technically that was what she wanted—a relationship, not a fling—but she had never expected for him to jump right to that point so quickly. Especially not during their non-date!

"No pressure, Kate," he pointed out with a smile.

She let out a breath and reached out to grasp the hand he still had rested against her face. She sandwiched it between both of hers and held it in her lap. "I do have feelings for you, Castle, but…I want to ease in here. It's been quite some time—obviously."

His eyes reflected a kindness and caring she was certain she had not yet known, even in her thirty years of life. "I'm fine with that. We can go as slow as you want, but I want you to know I'm in this. I have been for a while."

She skimmed her teeth over her bottom lip. "A while?"

He nodded in confirmation. "A while."

"I… I probably have, too," she confessed. Of course she had fought and tried to deny those feelings, but deep down she knew they had been there. She was grateful for how they met and how they were able to formulate a friendship slow and steady—exactly what her battered heart needed.

He gave her hands a squeeze. "Thought so."

She laughed. "Yeah…well…"

He leaned in, kissed her forehead, and then wrapped his free arm around her shoulders. "C'mon; let's go see if there's a cheesy movie on TV. We can wait while we wait for your clothes to finish drying."

"Sounds good to me." She then let him lead her towards the couch in the other room—towards what she knew would be a very interesting and very happy new beginning.

:)

FYI - there will be no update on Christmas; next update will be a week from today (next Saturday)