Elizabeth muddled through Monday morning. It was the same old things, which really wasn't bad. Just predictable.
Around ten o'clock the store was empty so she logged into her email to see if her sister Julie had responded from the previous week.
She looked up as the bell above the door jingled. "Good morning, Elizabeth."
"Jack," she greeted, a smile gracing her lips. "What brings you by? Need a book for Sawyer?"
"Very funny. Actually Brennan left a sock."
Jack held out a small white sock that she could tell was Brennan's. "Thank you."
He made himself a cup of coffee and handed her $1.50. "Slow morning?"
"Its typical. Around eleven we have a group of moms that bring their kids in for story time. They rent the area over there weekly from me."
"That's a good idea. You should have a book club twice a month. One for suspense or mystery, which I would totally come to, by the way, and one for romance, or other types of books. They could buy the book for the month from you. Help supplement your sales."
"Ah yes, David Baldacci. That explains that."
"Are you busy next Friday night?" he blurted.
"No, why?"
"Sawyer has been bugging me to make spaghetti and meatballs. I figured you and Brennan might want to join us." That made her mouth water.
"How would I get there and home?"
"I would take you."
"Jack, it's way out of your way."
"Its worth it to make the boys happy, in my opinion." Actually he would get to see her again so it was good for him too.
She didn't want to be dependent on anyone, let alone a guy she was just getting to know. "Can I think about it?"
"Of course." He finished his coffee and threw the cup in the trash. "See you soon?"
She nodded and watched him walk out the door leaving her alone once more with her thoughts. Her thoughts were very vocal. One thought yelled at her to text him immediately and say yes. The other said, what are you afraid of? He's a good guy. A third said to steer clear because its exactly what her mother wanted. She had been pestering her to start dating for a few months. She groaned out loud, grateful the eleven o'clock group hadn't come yet.
Did the fact she was even considering going to his home for dinner mean she was more ready to start dating than she thought? She looked at her wedding band and slid it off her finger, wiggling her fingers open and shut. That would take getting used to for sure.
The door jingled and she pushed her thoughts aside. "Good morning, everyone. Who's ready for a snack?"
She was rewarded with a chorus of "Me Me" and "Yay!" That made her happy.
….
That night, she sat in bed, staring at her phone. She picked it up three times, typed out a text to Jack, and then erased it before sending it.
Finally, she got up her nerve. It was just dinner. He didn't say it was a date, so it wasn't.
"I'll bring the garlic bread," she texted and hit send before she chickened out.
"Great! Pick u up 5?"
"Can we say 5:30?"
"Absolutely."
Jack came in for a cup of coffee every day for the rest of the week. He only stayed long enough to drink it but it was enough for them to build up their friendship. Enough for her to really look forward to going to his house. Enough for her to develop a good sized crush on him.
At five o'clock on Friday, she led Brennan out the door of the store immediately after locking it and rushed to their apartment. She ran up the stairs, giving her phone to Brennan to call Gran, and jumped in the shower.
At 5:25, she grabbed a plastic grocery bag and loaded it with garlic powder, butter, and two French baguettes she bought for dinner.
"I see them, Mom. Let's go."
"Do I look ok?" She really needed a girlfriend to ask for fashion opinions, not her five year old son.
"Yeah. You look so pretty." He was good for her self-esteem.
"Mmm, I love you, baby." She kissed both of his cheeks and handed him the bag of bread to carry.
Jack hopped out and opened the SUV door for Brennan to climb in and then for Elizabeth. "How was your day?"
"Fine. Nothing much changed since ten o'clock this morning when you left."
He laughed, closed both doors, and walked around the front to get in the driver's seat.
Elizabeth looked in the back. "Jack, please don't tell me you bought Brennan a booster seat."
"Ok," he said with a shrug.
"Jack, how much did it cost?"
"Hmm. I must have forgotten."
"Please don't buy him things he doesn't need."
"He does, though. The fold down booster was too small for him. As much as those two like each other, I'm guessing Bren will be in this car almost as often as Sawyer."
She looked out her side window. Now she felt like she owed him. She made a mental note to google how much they cost when she got home later. "I know what you're thinking, but I won't take your money."
"How could you possibly….?"
"I'm getting to know you. I know that it bothers you when people offer to help you or do things for you, but this is a necessity. You and I both want him safe." He squeezed her hand and then let go.
"Can you please ask me first next time?"
"Yes. I promise."
"Thank you."
….
When Jack pulled into his driveway, he could feel the tension in the car grow thicker. He glanced at his beautiful passenger. Her eyes grew big for a second. Then she cleared her throat and tried to pretend she felt nothing.
He knew that his home wasn't massive but at the same time, it was in a high end subdivision so it was obvious that whoever lived there, did well for themselves. Heck, his Land Rover said that. He pushed the button in his ceiling console that opened the two car garage door.
"Isn't this house awesome, Mom?" Brennan said excitedly.
"Its very nice."
He closed the garage door, turned off the engine, and unlocked their doors.
She took the initiative to open her own and Brennan's doors and grabbed the bread bag from the back seat.
As Jack walked in, he turned off his security alarm and reset it once they were all inside.
She was in way over her head here. Why had she even thought this could be considered a date? He was so far out of her league.
The boys ran into the living room and turned on the large screen TV.
Jack looked at her closely. She looked very uncomfortable. "Elizabeth? Are you ok?"
"What do you mean?" She put the bag on the counter and forced back her tears.
"I noticed a change in you once we pulled in the driveway. Is this making you uneasy?"
She hesitated. Should she be completely honest with him? Tell him that this wasn't who she was?
"You can tell me. I won't take offense."
"I thought maybe tonight was….I mean I think I want to…this…what is this, Jack? You and me tonight?"
He wanted so badly to pull her into his arms and hold her close. The woman needed affection like he needed air. "When I asked you on Monday to come, I was thinking it was just two friends having dinner with their boys. Now, if I'm being completely honest, it has become more of a date in my mind."
"Jack, I live in a rundown two bedroom apartment in the city. I have to stretch my money every month to make sure Brennan has food and we can make rent. I don't have a car and honestly I couldn't afford one if I did. I pray every day that somehow things will change for us, but it feels selfish. We are making it, even though it's hard. Other people don't even have a roof over their heads or food in their belly."
"So, when we pulled in to my driveway, you thought…?"
"That I'm in way over my head. How could I even entertain a tiny bit of hope that we could work?" She shook her head. "Where's your bathroom?"
"The closest is just down the hall. Second door on the left."
She rushed away and he started dinner. He second-guessed asking her over for dinner now. He was proud of what he had accomplished but to her, she felt inadequate. He certainly didn't see her that way. She was strong and independent and a great mom. She was smart and even had her own business.
She walked back in the kitchen, her eyes, slightly pink but she had a smile on her face. "Can you show me where you have a sheet pan and a bowl and knife, please?"
"Sure." His hands had raw meat stuck to them so he couldn't get them for her. He pointed toward the drawer with his elbow. "Silverware is in there." Then he used his foot to indicate where the pans were. The bowls are in the cupboard in front of me."
He stepped slightly to the side so she could open the cupboard. She reached over, her flowery scent filling his senses. "You smell so good," he said quietly.
She paused, her eyes meeting his. "So do you," she told him, a slight smile on her lips. She put the softened butter in the bowl and added the garlic powder to it, stirring it with the knife. "Do you have a bread knife?"
He nodded toward the knife block while he finished rolling meatballs. "Boys! Please set the table."
"Now?" Sawyer asked.
"Yes."
Elizabeth watched in awe as both boys came over and picked up two plates each and placed them on the table. Then they came back and got the forks and napkins. "Dad, you'll get the knives?"
"Yes, son. Thank you." Elizabeth gaped at Jack. "What?" he asked with a laugh.
"That's amazing. They just stopped playing and did what you asked. No complaining. I'm impressed."
"Don't be. I told him to be on his best behavior."
"Still." She put the last piece of buttered bread on the pan. "How high do you think?"
"Three fifty maybe?"
She pushed a few buttons and successfully turned on the stove. She stepped over and watched Jack cook the meatballs, browning them first.
"Did you want a glass of wine?" he asked as he took down two wine glasses. He knew that it would be at least three hours before he drove so he only planned on a partial glass for himself.
"Yes please."
He poured them both a glass and put the cork back on the bottle as she put the bread in the oven.
"Dad? We're hungry!"
"Ok, bud. Not too much longer."
He broke the spaghetti into the boiling water and covered the now bubbling meatballs and sauce. "That smells amazing," she told him.
Jack's phone rang in the other room. "Dad! Grandpa Ned is on the phone. Can I answer?"
"Sure, bud."
"Hi, Grandpa!"
"Your Dad?" Elizabeth wondered.
"No. Katie's. He lives in Atlanta now, since Katie passed. He's really good about skyping and calling every week for Sawyer."
"That's good."
"I'm planning a trip down there next summer. I think it will be good for Sawyer."
"And you? Will it be good for you?"
He put his glass on the counter and crossed his arms. "It won't be for me."
"He's your father-in-law."
"Was. But Sawyer will always be Ned's grandson, so I'll do what's best for him."
She nodded. "Tyler's parents passed away before I met him. I guess I don't know what you're going through."
"But you do." He reached for her fingers and squeezed gently. "You know so much of how I'm feeling." The desire to be in his strong arms was overwhelming. He pulled on her fingers and brought her close, forcing himself to go slow. "You're so beautiful."
She looked up at him, suddenly so sure he was what she wanted. "Hold me," she said quietly. "Please, Jack."
He opened his arms and wrapped her up in them. "I'm glad you're here, Elizabeth."
"Me too."
"Dad! Grandpa Ned wants to talk to you. He's hugging Mrs. Campbell, Grandpa, one second."
Jack let go of Elizabeth and said a quick prayer for patience. That was the last thing Grandpa Ned needed to know. "Hi, Ned. Yes, well, she's not married... Mrs. Campbell is just what Sawyer calls her….No, we aren't dating….We are just friends… It's new… Ok, Ned. Have a good night." He pulled out a large bowl from the cupboard and spooned the sauce and meatballs into it. Then he strained the water out of the pasta and put that in a separate bowl. "Elizabeth, can you grab a platter from the cupboard to put the bread on?"
"Sure."
Five minutes later, they were seated at the table. "I'll pray, Dad."
"Ok, son."
"Dear, God. Thank you for our food and for our friends. Thank you for Mrs. Campbell. She makes Dad happy. Through Jesus name, amen."
"Amen." Jack smiled at Elizabeth. She did make him happy.
Jack noticed that Sawyer didn't mention wanting a Mommy in his prayer. He wondered about the significance of that. Did he just forget?
…..
That night, Jack and Sawyer took Elizabeth and Brennan home and then came home to hit the sack.
"Can I ask you something, Sawyer?"
Jack sat next to him on his bed, like he did every night. "Ok."
"In your prayer tonight, I think you forgot something."
"What?"
"You didn't ask for God to bring you a Mommy."
"I didn't forget. He already brought her to me."
"What do you mean?"
"Mrs. Campbell. She's going to be my Mommy."
"How can you be sure?"
"I don't know. I just am. She's who I want."
…..
Elizabeth needed advice. The night at Jack's house had been a rollercoaster of emotions. She picked up her phone and dialed Viola.
"Hi, Beth."
"Vi, do you have a few minutes?"
"Sure, what's wrong?"
"Nothing, everything. I don't know. I went to a friend's house for dinner."
"A man friend? Sawyer's dad perhaps?"
"Yes. Let me guess. Brennan spilled the beans."
"I pick him up from school everyday so it was bound to come up. Beth, you really like him, don't you?"
"Yes. Tonight, I almost blew it. He picked us up and took us to his house. First of all, his Land Rover should have tipped me off but somehow I ignored that. Then I saw his house."
"Nice?"
"Its in Rolling Hills."
"Wow, ok."
"Four bedrooms, heated garage, big screen tv, chef's kitchen, pretty sure at least three bathrooms."
"Did you freak out?"
"Kind of. I told him what I have or rather what I don't have. Then I cried and hid in the bathroom." Viola was silent for a minute. "Are you laughing, Vi?"
"Of course not. What did he say when you came back out?"
"We finished cooking dinner and drank a half glass of wine. Then he told me that I was beautiful."
"Beth."
"I know and then he held me. Vi, I didn't know how much I needed that type of human contact until his arms were wrapped around me. It felt so right."
"So what's the problem?"
"We got interrupted."
"By what?"
"His son telling his dead wife's father that he was hugging Mrs. Campbell!"
Now Vi laughed. "Oh, Beth."
"What do I do? Can I do this? Can I let myself fall in love again?"
"Of course you can. Just let things happen. Enjoy getting to know him. Let yourself feel everything." She wanted to feel something again. She felt at the very least, attracted.
"Yeah. I'll try. Thanks, Vi."
"You're welcome. I love you, Beth."
"I love you too."