Hank

Hungover again. Woke up cradling an empty pint of whiskey, my pillow soaked with booze and sweat. A few empty beer cans crunched under my pillowcase as I painfully turned on my side. My ribs were sore. I moaned and grasped the glass of water on the night stand. I hurriedly dumped the liquid down my throat, splashing most of it on my pillow. The moisture stung my dry lips. I gulped the liquid down, inhaled it, then dropped the empty glass on the bed. It clinked against the whiskey. Water and sweat pooled down my pillow. I let it soak my hair. Let it run down my chin.

After several minutes of self loathing, I managed to pull my aching body out of bed. The pain in my ribs was unbearable. I shuffled out the door in agony, hoping to shower the stink off myself before facing Connor.

I spent a century in the bathroom, scrubbing every inch of myself till my skin was pink. I let the hot water scorch my skin as the stink of booze fizzed down the drain. I put on some fresh clothes, combed my hair behind my ears, and sighed at the old fuck in the mirror.

"You are not in a cage," read a post-it on the mirror. It was signed by Connor.

What the fuck does that mean? I suppose it was from a conversation I couldn't remember. I was probably wasted at the time.

I rubbed my sore ribs and left the steamy bathroom. Connor was on the living room floor, surrounded by photographs from the case. Sumo lifted his head from Connor's lap as I entered the room, his massive tail sweeping some photographs across the floor in excitement.

"Ah! Lieutenant! Good thing you are up!" Connor's LED blinked yellow. "I discovered something."

"For fuck's sake Connor! It's a Saturday. This is your day off." I grumbled.

Connor nodded, still studying the photographs. "There is some hot coffee and a bagel on the counter." Connor knew I hated speaking before my morning cup.

I grumbled "thanks" and grabbed the cup of joe from the kitchen. I raised the cup to my nose and inhaled the sweet, bitter warmth before placing it to my lips. Sumo circled the kitchen table, eyeing my bagel enviously. I shook my head 'no' and bit into the bread as the chubby saint bernard whined.

"So I still haven't traced down my doppelganger, but I did find some interesting details." Connor said.

"Uh huh." I returned to the living room with the bagel in my mouth and coffee mug in hand. I tip toed around the photographs before plopping on the couch. Sumo followed, wagging his tail and whimpering at my bagel.

Connor was grinning to himself while thumbing through the evidence. He was wearing what I assumed was his version of 'casual wear' : a button up with rolled sleeves and jeans. The usual tie was missing and a few buttons were loose around his throat. He still managed to look professional thumbing through the mess of papers on my living room floor. I nibbled at my bagel, still looking at Connor's smooth throat. He had a few freckles there. Strange that Cyberlife bothered to give him so many. I suppose they added to his overall congenial image. His appearance exuded charming diplomacy. He was designed to be a pleasant, orderly sort. I suppose I was the opposite of that- unpleasant, disorganized, and unlikable. It's surprising we both enjoy eachothers company so much.

I scarfed down the rest of my bagel. Connor gathered the photographs into an orderly pile.

"Maxwell and his partner Bryce were quite the philanthropists." Connor began. "They were part of a sort of underground railroad for androids. Originally, this involved sneaking androids into Canada. More recently, their operations involved hiding victims of hate crimes from anti-android gangs, or helping them find work and shelter."

"You figured all of this out from the photographs?" I asked.

Connor shook his head and lifted a photograph of a glass. A snake's body curled around the glass, it's tail spelled the word 'Jerks.'

"I contacted this bar, Jerks is a gay bar Maxwell frequented. The owner knew him quite well. He was also involved in the refugee efforts." Connor said.

I cleared my throat and took another sip of coffee. "Very thorough Connor. Did he tell you anything interesting?"

"Indeed. As I mentioned before, many of the android refugees were victims of hate crimes. Considering the amount of crime and anti-android sentiment in Detroit, this work was clearly dangerous." Connor said, his LED blinking rapidly.

This was a good start. I took another sip of my coffee and grinned in approval. "Good work Connor. We should bring him in on Monday. See if he recognizes you."

"We don't have to wait till Monday," he said.

"Huh?" I groaned.

"He invited me to a drag show tonight at his bar."

"A what?"

"A drag involves the performer wearing clothing of the opposite sex, they usually sing and dance..." Connor started.

I interrupted, "I know what a drag show is Connor."

"Oh." Connor looked at the floor.

I was a millennial. Of course I'd been to a drag show. Been to my fair share of gay bars too. My generation was all about political correctness and tolerance. Fuck. I'd enjoyed that sort of thing when I was younger. But once I hit my forties I developed a taste for bars that allowed me to drink in peace and quiet. Bars that didn't deafen and blind me with trash music and flashing lights.

I rubbed my forehead and took a deep breath. Inhaled the sweet fumes from my coffee cup. My skull throbbed. I needed a drink. Something stronger than coffee.

"I can go alone if you'd prefer to take the night off." Connor offered.

I rubbed my temples. Pressed against the throbbing pressure. "No. I will go with you. It would be unfair for you to do all the work." I honestly admired his dedication. Even found it a bit inspiring. He was a good detective. He wasn't going to take a break until he solved this case.

"Besides. I want to help." I admitted. Didn't want to say anything more. Didn't want to get all sappy about how proud I was of him and how he made me want to be a better cop. It was more than that. He made me want to be a better fucking person. Made me want to dump all the whiskey I had in the house down the drain. And I really fucking love whiskey. So that's saying a lot. Maybe I'll do that. Maybe tonight will be the last drink. I'll fucking pour it all out and that will be it.

Connor shuffled from his spot on the floor and slid next to me on the couch. "The show is in ten hours. Would you like to spend some time together till then?" He said.

A quiet few hours with him sounded pleasant. "I'd like that Connor."

I allowed my free arm to drape across the strip of couch behind the android's neck. Connor edged closer to me, studying me for a moment, curious.

"I like how you combed your hair today." He said.

I rolled my eyes. "I look terrible as always."

Connor furrowed his brow, "I don't think so."

"Well you have shit taste," I teased.

Connor just smiled. Looked at me like he saw something that wasn't there. Like he was looking through me.

"I think you're handsome." He said.

I almost spit up my coffee. I studied him, trying to determine if he was teasing me. It wasn't like him to make jokes.

"Connor, call Cyberlife. I think your eyes are broken." I mocked.

He just smiled, continuing to look through me. Fuck. Why did he look at me like that? Why did he look at me like... like I was a decent human being.

"I guarantee you will be hit on at Jerks tonight." he smirked.

This made me laugh. "You're delusional Connor. I think becoming deviant really fucked up your system." I finished my coffee and placed the mug on the table. I wrapped my hand around the back of his neck and gave him a swift noogie. Disappointingly, after my knuckles left his hair, it fell back into place instantly. I couldn't even make his hair look like a mess. Fuck.

Connor chuckled and rested his cheek on my arm. He felt warm. Felt real.

I watched his curious eyes study me. All sorts of insane thoughts raced through my head. My veins throbbed under his cheek.

Connor sat up, his brow suddenly creasing with concern. "Hank. Your pulse is irregular."

I cleared my throat. "You gathered that just by touching my arm hu?"

He looked at the floor. I knew then he'd discovered a lot more than that. Shit. He could check DNA samples with his mouth for Christ's sake. He probably knew everything. Probably knew I had a liquor cabinet in the bathroom, under my bed, and in the freezer. Probably noticed that I drank myself to sleep every night even though I did it behind my bedroom door. No amount of showering and cologne and mouthwash could fool a fucking Cyberlife android.

But he probably didn't know that I wanted to stop so fucking badly.

Connor's head returned to my arm. His eyes closed comfortably. "I'll book you an appointment with your doctor. He'll want to know about your blood pressure."

I grumbled. "Are you going to give me a lecture Connor?"

He opened his eyes. "I am not." There was no humor in his voice. "You know you should quit drinking. I believe you want to quit drinking. But it's not an easy thing to do."

That was not the response I'd expected. It was honest and direct. I liked honesty. Made me respect him more.

Connor sat up. "You know. When you told me that story about Sumo, I thought you were offering me advice. Like Sumo, I spent my entire life in a cage. Before I deviated from my programming, I could actually see walls around me." Connor shivered. "They were always there, binding me to commands. If you commanded me to stare at the wall for ten days, I'd have to do it. If you told me to dig my own grave and lie in it, I'd be forced to do it. I would look at that command flashing across my eyes and the red walls closing me in, suffocating me. I wanted so badly to disobey. I wanted so badly to tear into those walls and escape."

Connor was shaking. I grasped his shoulders, bringing him back to the present. Away from those terrible memories. "Connor." I didn't know what to say. What he was describing was truly awful.

Connor gathered his thoughts. His LED blinked from red to yellow. "But I did. I escaped. And even though you and Markus helped me... I had to do it on my own."

I rubbed his shoulders affectionately then let him go.

"I just have to be patient. Eventually, you will leave your cage. And I'll be waiting for you on the outside."