Chapter Twenty-Four

The preparations for the move began in earnest. Frank took care of Mary for the day so Jamie and Eddie could go see two of the houses in person. One was similar to the families Bay Ridge home and the other a more rustic ranch style home with a wraparound porch. Eddie was attracted to that house because it was all on the one floor like their apartment, it would give Mary the freedom to move around and when Bella started to walk it would give them an easier time watching her.

"If this is the house you like," Jamie replied. "It's in our price range, it's off the road, and you are right it will be good for Mary. Let's make a bid and get this going. The sooner we are out of New York the better."

They spoke to the realtor then headed back to New York. The closer they got, the more Jamie changed. Eddie watched it. While they were looking at the house, he talked about their family in the future tense, things they could do with their girls at the house, but now he was getting quiet and withdrawn, as if a place he lived all his life was toxic now.

Frank was holding Mary on his lap when the let themselves into the apartment. Eddie looked at him with concern, "She wanted to wait for you to tuck her in and she didn't quite make it," replied the doting Grandpa. "How did it go?"

"We put in a bid," Jamie replied. "A one story ranch house, lots of property, a big porch, very quiet neighborhood so that will be good for the girls going forward that's for sure."

"Anything you need to get this going and to make sure it's a smooth change for the girls, let me know. This is the only home they've ever known," Frank sighed handing Mary to her mother.

"It's the only home I've ever known too," Jamie sighed. "But, it's not my home now, not anymore. It's…so cold here, so many bad memories…I can't look around and not see Joey, and Eddie has the same issue. Even Mary had a hard time going to places we went to as a family. We have to do this Dad. We really do."

Frank was glad he could support his son in this, it hurt that he was going to leave, but he had his own family, he had to do what was right for them.

Jamie insisted on staying in Joey's room as they prepared to move. Mary had a lot of questions about that, she was used to seeing her parents being very affectionate with each other, hugs and kisses, but now this was something new and a little scary. So when they told her that they needed to talk to her, she began to cry.

"Mary," Jamie was astonished at her reaction. "No, please don't do it. I'll be good, I promise. I'll do all my therapy and I won't even cry I promise!"

Jamie took his girl into his arms, "Mary, honey, you didn't do anything wrong. I promise you…" He began to rock her as Eddie's eye filled with tears. She sat on the couch and held Mary's hands. "Baby, tell Mommy what you think is going on here?"

Marry sniffled and mumbled into Jamie's chest. "You're getting divorce."

Their eyes met over Mary's head, they had been right, she would find a way to blame herself. "Oh, Mary, no honey. No…" Eddie kissed her hand while Jamie rocked. "No, Mommy and Daddy have just been very busy lately, because we are going to be moving!"

Mary picked her head up, "Moving? Where we gonna go? To Grandpa's house?"

"No," Jamie replied. "No. Do you remember when we all went to the chocolate land with the Hershey kiss street lights? We are going to move there and live near a farm. Daddy got a new job, that's all."

Mary sniffled then smiled, "We are going to live by all the chocolate? Can we eat some?"

Eddie's face lit up, that was their little girl's sense of humor, and they hadn't seen that in a while. Perhaps this move would have a stronger healing affect than they realized.

Jamie and Eddie were both very proud of Mary. She took the idea of moving like a trooper, she was the strongest of them, just like her namesake. That night, when Eddie had put the girls to sleep, she found Jamie. "Thank you," she said softly. "Thank you for not telling your father what I did. I'm ashamed of it and I just…thank you."

"There's no reason to air our own private laundry in public, Eddie," Jamie replied. "I love you, you know I love you, I just can't live with what you did right now. I can't."

He got up to go back to Joe's room. "Can we have a glass of wine or a beer and just talk a bit like we used to? We need to make Mary feel more secure, she got that divorce idea in her little head for a reason, we have to make more of an effort to relate to each other at least as people."

Jamie agreed that his wall had hurt their little girl and he didn't want to do that. "Sure, I'll get it." Eddie sat on the couch and tucked her legs under her. Jamie got them each beers and sat with one cushion between them. "Did you hear back yet about Mary's protocol for her therapy at Hershey? We can't afford for that to stall."

"No, and it won't," Eddie replied. "I checked into a few support groups too, I know that's a rough spot for you right now, but I need to keep going. Like I've said, there is a lot of forgiveness that needs to happen and I need help doing my part of that. There's one not far from the house and half way to the Sheriff's Depot."

Jamie nodded, "I'll try another group, perhaps there won't be men preying on grieving mothers…" In that comment he revealed where he left most of the blame, with Steven. There was hope here, Eddie knew it.

The beer talks continued over the next several days, effectively breaking the ice and making the pair friendlier if not more intimate. They made a real effort to be engaged with Mary, to sit on the couch with her, to watch TV as a family, to play with her and with Bella.

Mary and Bella had their own little games they liked to play, but they rarely played them in front of their parents. One night, while the TV was set to Alvin and the Chipmunks, Mary saw her little sister looking around the room from her baby chair. Mary leaned over from Jamie's lap and blew a puff of air on Bella's face.

The baby let out her belly laugh that made everyone in the room smile anytime they heard it. When Bella stopped laughing, Mary blew again, and again Bella laughed. Jamie and Eddie both smiled, "She likes that."

"Yes," Mary replied. "We did it all the time before but she was too little to laugh. I played this with Joey and now I play it with Bella because he's not here, but I think he is still laughing when he watches us."

Her innocence warmed their hearts, it was just that kind of thing that they needed to pull them through. While their two girls played, Mary alternating between blowing on Bella's face and tickling the one foot she kicked the sock off of, Jamie and Eddie couldn't stop watching the other one smile and laugh. They hadn't done that for a long time, here and there one of the girls would do something to provoke some joy, but nothing as profound as this.

Eddie dropped her head back when Bella's tiny foot came out and kicked Mary in the cheek. Mary laughed at her, "No, no, I'm gonna get your footie…"

Jamie watched his wife, the way her delicate throat exposed itself, the way her golden hair fell back. Eddie felt his eyes on her and turned to meet his gaze. The magnetism that had always drawn them to one another ignited in that moment and they felt themselves giving in and leaning in. Their lips touched over Mary and Bella's heads, the kiss deep and soulful connecting them again on that deeper level that Jamie hadn't been allowing himself to go.

Eddie's heart sang with joy, if he could kiss her like that there was hope, she just had to find a way to lead him out of his self-imposed celibacy and reconnect again, if they could do that, they could start to heal even if they were still in the New York state of mind.

Bella tired of their game soon and started to cry, "She's done," Mary laughed. "She is still too little to play a long time."

Jamie laughed too picking Bella up, "I think your right honey."

Then they smelled it, "eewee, she did a poo!" Mary made a funny face.

"She sure did okay Bella let's get you changed," Jamie soothed.

"I can change her," Eddie offered. "You can sit and read a story with Mary, you don't get a chance to do that very often."

Nodding Jamie handed the baby over eager to spend some time with Mary.

"You want to play a game when Mommy comes back?"

"Yeah sure honey what game would you like to play," Jamie smiled.

"The colored card game..." She replied. "I'll good at that game."

Jamie laughed, "Sure, you want to get the game and set it up while changed Bella?"

Mary nodded, and Jamie got the Uno cards out to play. Eddie came back with Bella. "Oh cards, deal me in."

"We waited for you to start Mommy," Mary said counting as she took a card from the deck.

Eddie put Bella in her swing then sat down with Mary and Jamie, "Only a few rounds, okay, it's getting late "Mary nodded putting the deck down and checking her cards smiling.

They played three rounds Mary winning two out of three of them. "Okay it's bedtime," Eddie replied.

"One more game, Mommy, please," Mary begged.

Jamie sighed, "Okay that is all, and then you need to go to bed right away." Mary dealt the cards starting their last round. She was ready to doze off by the time Eddie declared Uno. Jamie put a card down glancing at Mary with a smile seeing how tired she was

He peaked at Eddie's cards to make sure she was able to go out and end the game. "Okay, monkey..." Jamie smiled. "Time for sleep."

Mary put her cards down pouting and rubbed her eyes. She reached up laying her head on Jamie's shoulder when he picked her up

Jamie tucked her in and kissed her head. She was asleep before her head hit the pillow. "Love you Mary," he whispered smiling at his sleeping daughter

Jamie came out of the bedroom and found Eddie sitting on the couch with her feet up. Her legs were bare and her hair down. She looked so beautiful.

"She was asleep before I even put her down," Jamie said sitting next to Eddie.

"She really wanted to play and spend time with us," Eddie smiled. "This rift between us really shook her up."

"A lot is changing for her, the sooner we can mend things the better," Jamie said.

"Do you mean that?" she asked. "Maybe we can talk and try to..." Eddie saw the wall drop.

"And try to," Jamie couldn't help but smile at her attempt.

Eddie sat down, "Try to find some more common ground to connect on. Mary is craving that from us."

"Yeah, I really mean that Eddie I want to work things out," Jamie said.

He turned and looked at Eddie, "I just don't know how to fix it, and I can't shake that image when I look at you and until I can."

"Let's try and work on that first," Eddie turned and leaned up placing a gentle kiss on his lips.

Jamie accepted the chaste kiss then pulled back, "I have the early shift."

Eddie sighed pulling back, "okay you should get some sleep then."

He cupped her cheek and gave it a kiss before turning to go bed.