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Nothing remarkable happened during the next days. Cassandra was doing some further investigations about the seekers and Mahariel had a lot to deal with. A very big pile of reports, for one. And her own bunch of considerations about Solas.

She could not regret what happened. A part of her wanted to but she just could not feel that way. Though, she kept thinking she should.

Her hand brushed the Crows tattoo on her neck. Dammit, how could she be so stupid? The last time she let herself go into that kind of things, it ended up with the most famous house of assassins of Thedas chasing her. Of course, the situation with Fellsathan had been way different. Her mistake with him had been that he knew too much. Solas did not, not yet…She shook her head. She hated that he did not, and that was the threat. Maybe professional deformation, but she was always drowning in so much lies, half-truth and omissions…She hated it. She wanted nothing more than to be fully honest with him but – Did you even consider that you actually could? You are the Inquisitor; the situation has changed – For now. I am Inquisitor today, what about tomorrow? We are speaking about the worst thing I ever did in my life…I refuse to let things come to this again – It did not have to happen this way. You freaked out and you decided not to trust Fellsathan – Don't come back on that, what's done is done – All I am saying is that it could work if you let it a chance – And what? What of the next time I freak out and have to flee? Am I going to drive a dagger through his heart before? – You do realize the clans contacted the Inquisition? You really think you can keep your secrets longer? What are you going to do when Leliana got it? Kill her too? You need to trust them at some point – I can't – Yes you can, you just refuse to – because it is not safe! – Is it or can't you admit to yourself you might have a home here? – for how long? We both know how this works – Do we? Because right now you just sound like some coward afraid of being happy – I…Maybe, but what if… – Stop with the what if! You cannot know, okay? The point is, they already know who you have been protecting all along, they will know about Analen and Linril without time. Dorian already does, did anything happen? No. So, tell me, who are you trying to protect now if not yourself? You are in love with him. Stop running away – you are saying that as if it was only up to me –

She cried out in frustration. Fuck, struggling with herself was insufferable task. She shook her head, trying to chase the thoughts. No, she had done the right thing when she kissed him. It had been more than three years since Fellsathan, she needed to stop beating herself down with that. She was in love with Solas, and, for what she could tell, he did appear to return the feeling. She needed to stop with the excuses. What was next was up to him, but what she knew was that she was not to bail now.

Quite happy with herself, she put her attention back on the reports. Going through the papers she noticed a letter in them. She frowned and opened it. She went through quickly and frowned deeper. Fenedhis. And Leliana missed that, obviously. Well, later with work then.

Solas was in the rotunda, thoughts running in his head as they had been for the last week. And he was not coming up with anything. For all which was unwise, ill-considered…She had showed wisdom, compassion, sense of duty…Could she…Could she ever understand? If someone could...He would not tell her now, but if he was to get involved in this, he had to consider being able to at some point. Fenedhis, in which kind of mess did you let yourself into? You know what has to be done, how can you jeopardize that with that? – It does not have to jeopardize anything. What she said in the Hinterlands…She can understand, I know that – She is willing to give him the benefice of the doubt but you did condemn the People – Do I have to purely ignore my feelings and hers, then? – Could you be any more selfish?! How much do you want to hurt the woman you claim to be in love with?! – I never wanted to hurt her – but you already did. Remember the mark? – There must be a way to save her! – And what about the others? Do you expect her to forgive you for THAT? – I…I have to look for other options. Things have changed, this world is not what I thought it was. This is not right – But this is what must be done – I cannot lose her – But you will – SHUT. UP.

He frowned in front of his panel. He could not think clearly here. Not when he was in the same building as her. He needed to go outside, to find a spot where he could clear his head. It was already late in the evening; the Altus and the Spymaster had left the rotunda. Good, the less questions, the better; he was definitely not in the mood for these.

He headed out of the Grand Hall, wrapped in a cloak. He did not give attention to the similar shape walking few meters in front of him in the courtyard. Likely a servant or a merchant. Not like he really cared for the time being. However, the said figure seemed…jumpy.

After few steps walking in front of him, she dared to turn the slightest to know who was behind. Not a lot, almost nothing. But enough for him to take a glimpse of a white strand going loose. She did not show any kind of surprise or suspicion and simply went on. If she recognized him, she did not let it show. Him, however, his lips parted with surprise and he stopped his steps for a second. What was she…? Probably nothing. Would not be that strange for her to have to sneak out to the tavern after all. But why didn't he feel the mark? He frowned a bit. She eventually figured how to cloak it more efficiently. Not that it was particularly a bad thing, but knowing he could always find her thanks to it had been comforting somehow. He would have to keep an eye on that.

However, he reconsidered his thoughts about the tavern when she disappeared after a corner. Why would she trigger her stealth? He could not help but trying to feel the Anchor around. He could still hear it, but it was not the beacon it had been, a whisper which was making it hard on him. But he could tell one thing: its direction was not the tavern. Or anywhere in Skyhold. It was outside.

Fuck, what is he doing here? Mahariel wondered before noticing the rogue strand. Hopefully he did not see it. Still, she took the first chance to disappear into stealth and hurry her pace. She could not have anyone following her on this. And following her was something Solas did. Truth be told, knowing it was him behind, she was curious. If she was not on something which could not wait, she would have gladly investigated. But she had no time.

As soon as she was cloaked, she broke into a sprint. Better safe than sorry. A bit of help from a fade step and it was all good. She still did not know how Solas had been able to follow her in Val Royeaux, he had been dodging the question when she brought it up. The only proper explanation she could find was that she had been careless at some point. Or the Anchor. Cloaking it was complicated and she had no clue if it was working. She rushed through the bridge and slowed down once her feet hit snow.

The surroundings of Skyhold were full with tents and barracks. She sneaked into the crowd. A lot of soldiers were still up. She let down her fade-cloak and walked in the shadows, keeping her mana and stamina for later.

She finally turned east when she saw the firsts trees of the forest. Should be in there.

She entered the woods with less precautions considering her discretion. She was to be found. However, she summoned a barrier around her. She winced on the inside. She had become used to someone else drawing it. Hers was so weaker. Commander Elaine and Vivienne taught her how to strengthen it in combat, tapping into her adversary's link to the Fade when hitting them. But without anything to hit nearby, it was just weak. She started at the Antivan accent.

"My old friend."

She leapt instantly, a dagger already in her hand. She had every reason to expect a trap. The Crow held smugly his empty hands – not like blades were not in his sleeves.

"As I said, I want only to talk." The man looked around suspiciously. "Why don't you soundproof us, dear?" She snorted.

"So, the soldiers won't hear me shout? I'll pass, thank you." He rolled his eyes.

"So little trust. I only assumed you would not want any ears lurking."

"I'll take my chance."

Solas was out of breath when he found back her track. Finding the Anchor was way harder and was tapping in his mana in a way he did not see coming. She was fast. Faster than him. But he could not slow down, he could feel the track evaporating incredibly fast too.

His fade-cloak was hard to keep and he granted himself some rest with it when he was among the encampment, wandering into the alleys, following discreetly the Anchor. He had to put it back on when she turned for the woods.

He missed a little part of the conversation. He almost stepped in when he heard the Antivan accent. She could not be serious. But they really seemed to be discussing this time. Instead he pricked up his ears.

"– cut the crap, Ignacio. Is that about Venicio? I did not want to kill him, he left me – "

"No choice." Interrupted the man, shaking his head. "Regrettable, but I am willing to take your word on this. He was not exactly the most reasonable interlocutor for you to talk to. He has never been very forgiving."

Solas pursued his lips. Of course, she would take the blame face to another Crow to avoid him troubles for his actions.

"Forgiving? Give the man some credit, would you forgive the murderer of your son?"

"We can always forgive family, can't we?" He tilted a bit his head to take a look at her neck – more of a dramatic gesture, considering her hood was not letting him see it. "You are not one of us, but you are family, Ellasin. I made you."

Solas frowned, uncertain. Her ties with the Crows had been obvious for a long time. He knew too little of the Guild to get any insight from that.

"So, what? You are here to blackmail me with that?"

"No, Inquisitor. I am here to offer a truce. Without Venicio, no one is willing to hold to this grudge and we do not want you as an enemy."

"You do not want the Inquisition as an enemy." Corrected she. She crossed her arms. "And if I refuse you have a lovely ambush ready to use."

Solas looked suddenly around, unnerved. But he spun around too quickly and a root cracked under his foot. He froze as both Mahariel and Ignacio's heads turned towards him. The Crows did not need a word from Ignacio. One had a dagger on his throat less than ten seconds later.

"Master, we have a spy." Mahariel held a hand to Ignacio immediately.

"No. Don't kill anyone before I know who it is."

Ignacio nodded and confirmed the order, apparently really willing to play nice with her. With the hood casting a shadow on her face, Solas could not tell her expression. Her voice was neutral and sovereign when she declared.

"Release him. Now." Ignacio raised an eyebrow.

"He heard us." She glared at him, tone ominous.

"We said nothing he didn't know, and one way or another, I don't fucking care. Release him now. I won't say it again."

She glanced towards a tree nearby. Oran and another elf dropped immediately from a branch, surrounding Ignacio, arrow aimed at his throat. Oran spoke menacingly.

"You heard the mistress."

At the appearance of the extra elves, Solas shifted a bit with surprise. Mistress? The Crow not immobilizing Solas pulled a dagger out, ready to react. Neither Ignacio or Mahariel moved the slightest. Ignacio's nose finally wrinkled and he said with obvious disapproval.

"You are getting softer."

He gestured to the man holding Solas to do as said. Once the dagger was away and he was not immobilized anymore, Solas remained there, staring into Mahariel's eyes. Not a single expression was readable in her gaze. Ignacio nodded to his men to step back, as did Mahariel. Ignacio pointed out.

"You can talk about ambush." She gave a sarcastic smile.

"I learnt from the best." She paused. "We will continue this conversation. Not like you don't know how to enter the stronghold." He nodded and handed her a paper from his jacket. She raised an eyebrow. "What is it?"

"A proof of good faith. Be well, my old friend. We shall talk soon."

She kept an eye on him and the three Crows as they left, before going through the paper. A contract, recent one. And her name had disappeared from the post-scriptum. She folded it into her pocket and frowned at Solas. She loudened her voice.

"Leave us." Oran reappeared in a second.

"Mistress?"

"Please."

Oran frowned at Solas but finally nodded. She waited a bit more. She knew her friend wouldn't spy upon her. She looked back at Solas and sighed. Asking why and how would lead nowhere. And she was more worried about what he had heard. She pushed away her hood and went to sit on a nearby trunk.

"You have to stop running into Crows' ambushes."

"So do you." She looked at him an instant before lowering her gaze. She did not even know what to say here. Her teeth played over her lip.

"You can ask, but I cannot promise to answer."

She tried to keep her voice still. She did not want to lose him. Yet, how could she offer the truth? It involved so much more than just her, if the fact that the Inquisitor was the Banal'ras ever slipped…Not only her was undone, the whole Inquisition was, and the rogue organization with it. He remained silent a moment, pondering. He finally came to sit next to her, echoing her sigh.

"I should not have followed you. We are past that. I was worried you would run into troubles, Mahariel. I should know you can take care of yourself. You have my apologies."

She spun at him, dumbfounded. Wide eyes welled up, peering at storm ones. He received the sight with surprise on his face, unsure of what he said to have her tearing up like that.

"Vhenan? Did I...I am making you cry." Declared he lamely, not understanding and yet, angry with himself.

She shook her head, unable to let out a word under the emotion. How could he not confront her? Not step away from her, while she just admitted she would not tell him what this was about? She would not even have hoped for such…Trust. She tried to choke back the tears with little success.

Uncertain of what to do, he tentatively reached for her shoulders to huddle her against his chest. He did not understand for now, but it did not lessen his urge to comfort her. He was relieved to feel her, far from fighting the embrace, welcoming it and sliding into his arms.

He held her close as she tried to calm down, listening to his heartbeat. She peeked up at him from the crook of his neck, eyes full of gratefulness and even more. He smiled softly, stroking the silver hair and waiting for her to speak. Her voice came out low.

"Ma serannas." He tilted his head, still unsure.

"For what?"

"You did not run, you did not…You understand. You…Trust me enough, despite what you saw and heard." She tried to explain her feelings, failing to find the words. He nevertheless nodded slightly, beginning to see what happened.

"You didn't think I would." He paused before adding, seeing how it could have been understood as an accusation. "You didn't think anyone would. Because no one did. Or at least, too few." He could not help but relate. How many had understood why he did what he did? Wisdom, Felassan…Perhaps Nyreos, he was not even certain. She bit her bottom lip and nodded slowly. She lowered her gaze.

"I…Wish it was simpler. I wish I could explain, I want to tell you, I just…"

"Can't."

He finished for her, sadness grasping at his voice. His arms tightened around her. She was too young for this type of burden. He still felt the weight, and he had had thousands of years to get used to it. How complicated had been her life? She left her clan so young, ended up in Tevinter hardly older…Their stories had been so different, yet, they made them alike in many ways. His hand reached for her chin to have her look at him.

"I know you, Mahariel. You protect your people. You make things right. You don't care what sacrifice it will ask from you, you do not even think about it. You do what must be done. This is admirable. I cannot say I do not hope one day, you will allow me to lighten your burden. But I shall not force the truth out of you. I do trust you."

"I don't deserve that, vhenan'ara." She whispered. A slight frown creased his forehead.

"You don't have a say in this, vhenan." She pursued her lips, unable to say anything but to repeat.

"Ma serannas." She paused and closed her eyes. "I trust you too. And…for what it's worth…I'm sorry. For so much." He kissed tenderly her forehead and spoke just as low.

"Me too, vhenan."

She tilted her head slightly, uncertain what he was referring to. She did know he was hiding things but, truth be told, he was obviously better at it than her. It was probably the first time he admitted he had been keeping things. She did not pry, having no wish either to intrude and to force the truth out of him. They fell into a comfortable silence for a time, remaining closely embraced. She eventually asked.

"You were going somewhere, were you not?" He pursued his lips and remembered how he wanted initially to dedicate this night to think, outside of Skyhold. He finally shook his head.

"Not tonight."