Halloween had packed the nearest bar district to the university, and the streets were swarming with lazy homemade sheet ghosts, sexy witches, and half-naked nurses. Hajime negotiated his way past a particularly loud group of a drunken princess, a Frankenstein monster with green face paint, and a Dracula with his long cape dragging in the slush turned into puddles. The night was cold and wet. Heavy flakes of sleet soaked the streets, and people were slipping on the wet coldness in their sneakers and high heels.

Where the hell was this bar, anyway?!

He hadn't spoken with Tooru since they had kissed at the pool that night. Over two months ago, the longest they had ever gone without speaking to each other.

Many nights he had picked up the phone and stared at the message display but where could he have even started? Besides, he hadn't kissed anyone and flown half-way across the world the next morning, so he didn't particularly feel like it was up to him to take the first step.

But then it had hit him that Tooru had no intention to explain himself. This was how he had planned to leave things between them all along. To just one-sidedly cut everything off without giving Hajime the chance to have any say in anything. This was the end of their – whatever they were after the kiss – because Tooru was a coward.

Well, it settled it, then. If the mountain was too much of a coward to face Hajime it seemed like Hajime had to go to the mountain. Quite literally. He had saved all his earnings from his part-time job, cashed out his savings, and borrowed the rest from his parents but god damn it, he had decided to make to America even if he had to swim across the ocean.

His plan had been to track Tooru down at his dorm at the campus. He could afford the shitty hostel room only for two nights, so there was no time to waste. Then he had noticed an Instagram update of Tooru at some bar. Green Gin Mill, the location tag had said and narrowed his search quite significantly.

The picture had been a bit fuzzy but in it Tooru – in some kind of angel costume, it seemed – was hugging some guy dressed as a doctor. He was kissing the guy's cheek and flashing a peace sign, and the guy was winking at the camera with a stupid smirk plastered on his face.

Someone bumped into Hajime and threw a quick "sorry" over their shoulder before carrying on with the crew. Automatically Hajime bowed and was about to apologize when something green caught his eye couple bars down the street. Finally.

Like an oasis at the rough sea, a bright green neon sign of a windmill blinked over the crowd in the sleet rain. The wings of the mill rotated on repeat, and "Green Gin Mill" read on the plate. With new determination, Hajime strode through the flow of drunken university students in his wet sneakers.

The bar was a little hole in the wall with half of its customers spilling out to the street. He squeezed through the door and was greeted by the buzz of conversation, loud music, dim lighting, and floors sticky with spilled drinks. All the tables and seats were taken, so he searched for a corner where he could scan the crowd without being in the way.

Finding an angel with chocolate brown hair out of the sea of colorful Halloween costumes proved to be quite difficult. It was like looking for Waldo in a crowd of other Waldos.

Hajime was about to check his phone again in case Tooru's group had changed locations when he spotted a familiar doctor costume at the bar trying to maneuver two beers through the gridlock of people trying to order. He was almost a head taller than others and broad-shouldered, so he stood out somewhat in his white doctor jacket and head mirror.

He reached the guy just as he sat down at his table packed with other students. Tooru was nowhere to be seen, though.

"Excuse me," Hajime said and patted the guy's shoulder. He silently cringed at his heavy accent.

"Yeah?" the guy looked up at him, and the conversation died at the table.

"Erm, you don't know me but – "

"Sorry, I can't hear you," he interrupted and pointed at his ear. "You're gonna have to speak up!"

Awkwardly Hajime leaned closer. He caught a whiff of the guy's aftershave. Had Tooru smelled this, too, when he had been necking with him?

"I'm a friend of Oikawa's!" Hajime shouted to the guy's ear. "Can you tell me where he is?"

"Oikawa?" the guy looked at him confused, then turned to the rest of the table. "Do we know an Oikawa?"

"Does he mean Tooru?" one of the girls suggested.

"Oh, Tooru! He was here a minute ago…" the guy looked around the crowd like he could've found him, "Did anyone see where he went?"

"I think he went to get some air. Check out the back!" the girl continued to shout across the table and pointed in the direction of the restrooms. "There's a door there to the street."

Hajime nodded his thank yous but before he could leave the guy caught him by his jacket.

"You wanna wait with us? I'm sure he'll come back soon. Hey Meg, make some room!"

Enough people had been invading his personal space for the night, and the back of his head had begun to ache. The noise and cigarette smoke weren't helping. He was in no mood to put up with these strangers and glared at the guy before politeness could stop him.

"Sorry, I'm just looking for Tooru. Have a nice night."

"Okay, well, come back to sit with us! Let's do some shots!"

The table erupted in joyful cheers, and spilling shot glasses were lifted in unison. Hajime left the cheering table behind and headed towards the restrooms. The narrow hallway in the back was filled with people standing in line to the bathroom. The backdoor loomed at the other end, and Hajime groaned silently.

Great. Maybe it would be easier to go around the building to the other side? But what if he missed him or got lost? He hadn't come all this way to miss Tooru by a few minutes.

The stench of perfume and hairspray wafting around one group of girls touching up their makeups almost knocked him out, but he made it through. Gasping and coughing he swung the back door open – thank god it hadn't been locked – and sucked in the cool night air. The door let to a back alley with dumpsters and fire escapes. Here the sleet was deeper, and the music and people's voices carried muffled from the distance.

"Hajime?"

It was shadowy, but the bright signs from the main street glimmered enough for Hajime to spot a white angel with chocolate brown hair standing in the middle of the sleet rain, staring at him with big, round eyes. The hem of his white robe was soaked, the wings made of fake feathers were ruffled, and the yellow halo waggling above his head was slightly askew.

"You're not easy to find," Hajime said and stepped closer. He noticed Oikawa was also wearing some kind of glitter make-up around his eyes and the long eyelashes were white like they were frozen.

"Wha – how did – " the angel Oikawa stammered in disbelief, and if Hajime hadn't been so worn-out and done with everything he would have enjoyed this rare occasion of confused Oikawa more.

"What are you doing here?"

"I came to check if your teammates have already grown sick and tired of you."

And to figure out what that kiss was all about back then and what we are supposed to be these days? He had wanted to ask those questions for two months – hell, he had flown thousands of kilometers to ask them – but now that he was face-to-face with Tooru the words got stuck in his throat.

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

So that you wouldn't run away.

"I wanted to surprise you," Hajime's mouth spew out before his brain could come up with a proper snide comeback.

Oikawa's face lit up in a genuine smile as rare as his bewilderment, and Hajime couldn't help but grin in return. It was like they were together again, walking home from after-school practice, taking the shortcut and teasing each other.

The memory of the shortcut and the pool melt Hajime's smile away.

"Actually, there was a reason why I came," he said and steadied himself to look Oikawa straight in the eye. "There's something I need to talk to you about."

"Well, you could've just picked up the phone," Oikawa said with a chuckle and leaped over a wide puddle of slosh between him and the back door. "Would've been a hell of a lot cheaper than flying half-way across the world. Not to mention eco-friendlier."

"This isn't something I wanted to talk over the phone."

"Well, can it wait for a little? I'm getting cold. Let's get something hot to drink and my circulation working again. I'll introduce you to the others. Some of them are from my new team. Actually, Jake is – "

"I'd rather talk just the two of us."

Oikawa turned to glance at him. "Oh? Sounds serious, but sure. Why don't you wait here while I let them know we'll be leaving? My dorm is close by, so we can just walk there."

The backdoor clanked shut, and Hajime was left alone in the deserted alley. With a deep sigh, he stretched his neck to try and ease the tension and aching building behind his eyes. His breathing steamed out in puffs, a telltale sign that winter was well on its way. Soon, the pool next to their shortcut would be drained and banks of snow would hide their little sneaking hole on the fence.

So far Oikawa seemed to be…normal. Hajime didn't know what he had been expecting but he had imagined there would be at least some kind of reaction – a recollection of that night. Instead of gaining certainty towards one way or another, this threw Hajime off even more.

Or maybe this was his answer. To just let it go and forget about it. Tooru certainly had or at least pretended to have done so. Had he just traveled all this way to – No, whether it was this or that, he had needed to hear it from Tooru in person. To see it with his own eyes.

"Okay, we'll all set. Ready to go?" Oikawa interrupted his mulling. He looked strange wearing a winter coat over his robe but at least he had lost the attachable halo.

On their way to the dorm, Oikawa chattered about the university, his new team, training, and people he had befriended. Everything was so different from back home, but everyone had been super helpful and included him. For the most part, Hajime let him fill the silence without really caring about these people and places he didn't know but when Oikawa excitedly told how much potential the spikers of his new team had for him to exploit there was a strange tightness in his chest.

"I meant to ask, how'd you find me?"

"Instagram. You'd tagged your location."

"Oh. Then you must've met Jake, he was in the picture with me. The doctor."

"Yeah, I saw him."

"He's the captain and my roommate."

"What position he plays?"

"Middle blocker. You should see him on the court," Oikawa said somewhere between admiration and excitement. "He's fast, almost as fast as Hinata even though he's so big. I showed him a couple of Karasuno's games, and we've been trying those pin-point tosses with him."

"I thought you couldn't do them."

"Yeah, but we have more strong players like Ushiwaka against us early on, so we can't rely on schemes alone. I gotta say, I'm kinda excited to see if I can really do those god-like tosses."

Hajime hunched his shoulders and pursed his lips. He had never doubted Aoba Johsai was strong, but maybe Oikawa could have made it to the nationals with a better team. With a better ace.

"Well, it sure sounds like you've found your dream team," he said and mentally cringed at how petulant he sounded even to his own ears.

Oikawa glanced at him. "Yeah, I guess," he said quietly. He stopped in front of a gate that led to a high apartment building. "This is me. If you want, you can stay the night. Jake said he won't mind."

The dorm room was nothing special. A bunk bed, two desks piled with books and magazines, and a small fridge in the corner. There were a couple of volleyball posters and a little chalkboard on the wall and a stack of familiar looking tatami pillows on the floor. A piece of home in this foreign place.

Oikawa shed his jacket and conjured a short-legged, collapsible chabudai from under the bed and a small hotplate. In no time, they were comfortably seated and slurping steaming mugs of tea. Oikawa had offered to spike Hajime's drink with a dash of booze, but he declined. Since when he had started to drink this much, anyway?

"So, what'd you wanna talk about? You sounded like someone had died or something."

"No, nothing like that."

"What then?"

Hajime put his mug down and took a steadying breath. Oikawa was looking at him with his head tilted. He was still wearing his angel makeup which looked much weirder in proper lighting than it had in the dim glimmer of the alley.

"I didn't like the way things were left…between us."

Oikawa frowned. "Nothing was left like anything. We're fine."

"Are we?" Hajime squinted.

"Of course, why wouldn't we be?"

"Then what's with the silent treatment? Two months, no calls, no messages, no nothing."

"Aww, what's the matter? Missed me?" Oikawa sneered. "Sorry, but I've been a tad busy with getting things started here."

"It doesn't take much time to drop a couple lines."

"Is this really what you came to ask me all this way? Why I haven't called? You could've just – "

"Why'd ya kiss me?"

Oikawa shifted in his seat and knead his neck awkwardly. "Just forget about it. I was drunk that night."

"You weren't that drunk."

"Yeah, I was."

"But there must've been some kinda reason still. Why? You like me or something?"

The way Oikawa wouldn't meet his eyes and everything kind of went blank on him told Hajime he had just hit the nail on the head.

"What does it matter? It's not like it would've ever gone anywhere, especially now."

"And you thought it would be acceptable to decide all that by yourself?"

Oikawa glared at him. It had been a while since the last time he had looked at Hajime in anger like that. Years, maybe.

"Yes, I did. Because it wasn't any of your business. Whatever I might've felt – That kinda thing, it was useless, so I did nothing."

"Except that you kissed me," Hajime raised his voice. "And then up and left and took zero responsibility. Do you have any idea how much I've been wracking my brains these past two months?!"

"Well, now you know!" Oikawa threw his hands up. A slight tremble and thickness crept into his voice. "But don't worry, there's an ocean between us, so you don't have to think about it anymore. If you could've just let it go, for once in your life, it would've all gone away."

"But it hasn't gone away, has it?" Hajime asked quietly.

The brown of Oikawa's eyes blurred, and he shook his head in silence. A tear rolled down his cheek leaving a shiny trail behind, and before he knew what he was doing Hajime reached to wipe it off. The glitter smudged under his thumb a little. Oikawa's white eyelashes fluttered, and he leaned against Hajime's palm.

"Dumbass. You must've known I wouldn't let it go. It's you, so of course, I wouldn't."

Oikawa let out a small, teary chuckle. "Because you've got me all figured out?"

"Because I've got you all figured out."

"You're kinda annoying, you know that?"

"You, too," Hajime said with a tentative smile. "Now," slowly he leaned over the small tabletop while sliding his hand behind Oikawa's neck, "there's something I've been meaning to return."

Oikawa's eyes widened when their lips brushed, and a muffled sound of surprise escaped him. It was dry and chaste compared to the one Tooru had given him that night. When Hajime pulled back, he monitored Oikawa's face closely in case he was taking an entirely wrong turn with this. Oikawa blinked at him in shock, his lips slightly parted.

"Wh – but," he stammered.

"The next time you need to tell me something," Hajime said and hold Oikawa's eyes, "don't just spring it on me and then run away. I know it's scary but you're gonna have to trust me. Just like you've done with everything else so far."

Oikawa swallowed and nodded. "Okay. I promise."