Disclaimer: I don't own The Rocky Horror Picture Show
A/N: Originally 'Episode 1, scene 1' was the first chapter of this story. As of 4/15 I began writing new scenes so that episodes would be closer to 25 minutes, so we could make use of interesting filming locations near my home, and so that Frank could have more screentime (he was absent from later episodes). I hate him more than my character ever could but he's really popular and makes a fascinating antagonist.
Hopefully everyone likes it!
(Magenta and Riff Raff are sitting outside the castle in some sort of beautiful forest. Both look bored)
Magenta: so this is Earth?
Riff: yes, dear.
Magenta: it's rather green.
Riff: I've noticed.
Magenta: weren't we supposed to be landing near a town?
Riff: there's a town past all the trees.
Magenta: when do we go home?
Riff: you keep asking that question and I keep answering it - when we're ordered to by the people back home.
Magenta: so, when he's dead. We're like Napoleon's guards... we can only leave once we've brought upon his untimely but well-deserved death.
Riff: indeed.
Magenta: not that poisoning him would be good for us in the long run.
Riff: I should think not. (Pause) Why don't we return to the castle? The heat of this too-near sun seems to be addling our brains a bit.
(Cut to them sitting at the kitchen table looking awkward)
Magenta: So... won't we run out of supplies eventually? Can you calculate any sort of 'return home by' date? You are the Mr. Mathematics of the family.
Riff: we'll be able to resupply everything with the help of nearby Earthling settlements, save for fuel.
Magenta: will we run out of fuel parked like this?
Riff: it does decay at a known rate. We got here with about 90 Imperial Cubic Measures of fuel. If the fuel decays at a rate of 0.03 percent how much do we have left in ten years?
(Draws equation "A(t) = 90 (1-0.03)^10 on paper or a whiteboard - probably the latter, because those things are everywhere in the house of a mad scientist)
Magenta: I flunked algebra, honey.
(Finishes writing the answer, after typing into an ancient-looking graphing calculator he found in his coat. What mad-science lab assistant doesn't keep a graphing calculator in his coat?)
Riff: after ten years we've decayed to 66 Imperial Measures.
Magenta: How much do we need to get home?
Riff: 50.
Magenta: I'm not waiting that long.
Riff: I doubt we'll have to. (Pause) Perhaps you should go wake up the Master and tell him we've arrived. It'll take your mind off of things.
A/N: The so-called prologues will probably be before the opening credits. There's a name for that, which I can't recall.
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