Dear friends – thank you everybody who read and especially commented on the previous chapter. Thank you, S0phea, for favoring the story and to the Guest: yes, Mieza won't evoke happy memories in Hephaistion of this story though I hope nothing of the kind happened there to real Hephaistion.
Warnings: none, actually, for the chapter itself. Hephaistion is dealing with the aftermath of his horrific experience previous evening, and things go out of hand; out of hands, actually.
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343 (end of summer – early fall)
"What's wrong, Theseus? Why are you still asleep? Theseus?" Perdiccas shook his friend's shoulder till the later opened his eyes and stared blankly at the intruder.
"Are you all right?" Perdiccas asked again seeing that there was no response.
"Nothing is wrong…. Why are you here?" Hephaistion's mind was still clouded from the sleep. The boy yawned and drew himself up into the sitting position on the bed. Perdiccas saw how his friend's face suddenly became distorted with pain; moments later he slid back into horizontal position, eyes tightly shut as an artificial barrier between the external world and internal pain.
"Are you hurt?" there was a concern in Perdiccas' voice but Hephaistion didn't care.
"Go away!"
"What's wrong with all of you?" Perdiccas loudly whispered, "I came here hoping to get some answers…"
"Go look for them in other places!" with as much venom as he could master spitted out Hephaistion and turned away. Then he opened his eyes. The bumps of the uneven surface of the wall plastered in dull white reminded him of yesterday horrific experience, when his body was repeatedly knocked against the rough wooden table by Aristotle's vicious thrusts into his body. Feeling nauseous from the revolting memory, he brought his arm to the mouth, trying to supress the gagging effect. He saw his arm was bandaged and remembered how he bit himself trying to silence the pain that was rocking his body. The fact that his tormentor took care of him after the fact made Hephaistion further sick with disgust.
"Theseus, what's going on?" Perdiccas asked again.
Silence.
"Theseus, what's the matter? I am not leaving till I get some answers."
Seeing his threat being as inefficient as his pleas, Perdiccas came closer and leaned over curved body of his friend. He noticed the bandaged arm and, extending his own, poked with his finger at the material.
"What's that? I didn't see it yesterday. When did it happen? How?"
Realizing there was no escape, Hephaistion mumbled through the clenched teeth, "You didn't say a word to me since Alexander's return to Mieza and now you're here? I don't need your company and I don't need your concern either."
"I didn't come here because of you, I came because of Alexander."
"You have some balls!"
"Of course I do! Do you?"
If Perdiccas hoped to illicit an answer with his challenging question, he was sadly mistaken. After the initial short outburst, Hephaistion clammed up again, hoping that sooner or later Perdiccas will lose interest in him and leave.
"Fine," after some consideration said Perdiccas, "you don't want to tell me what happened, I will tell you my side of the story. Yesterday evening I went to visit a new girl and Alexander went to visit Aristotle wanting to share with him some strange effects of the… err… some weirdly smelling substance. When I came back, everybody was already asleep, including Alexander. This morning, well, this very early morning, I was awaken by Harpalos. Do you know that he is a very early raiser, just like Alexander? Anyway, Alexander was already gone and it looked like all the others only waited for this moment to wake me. They all started to tell me that something was wrong with Alexander, he came back yesterday a short time after he left, his face white as death and not talking to anybody he went directly to his bed to sleep though it was relatively early. He didn't respond to any of the questioning from other boys. They all hoped I knew anything but I was as clueless as they were.
There was not much any of us could do on the matter, so after the usual morning routines we all showed up for Aristotle's lecture. Alexander was already there, he behaved as if nothing happened but was very reserved and didn't respond to any questions pretending, rather well, being interested in some scroll he spread over his lap. Aristotle was late, which is highly uncharacteristic of him. Then Theophrastos showed up saying that Aristotle's wife was unwell and the teacher had to take care of her. It was the lamest excuse I've ever heard. It was obvious to everybody that something was going on but we couldn't quite figure out what. It was also noticed that you were missing too and Theophrastos' explanation about some urgent assignment for you didn't make much sense. After the first lecture, dull as usual, Theophrastos declared that the rest of the planned lectures were cancelled for today and instead we have to go to the gymnasium for training and dedicate the rest of the day for catching up with homework…. absentmindedly forgetting that there was none.
Alexander, to everybody's surprise didn't say anything about this change of plans though he is first to object when lectures are not carried out according to schedule. Instead, he dutifully reported to the trainers and we were obliged to follow his example. I tried to speak with him but was immediately reprimanded for my over-talkative mood; it was obvious that no explanations were forthcoming from the prince but something was definitely wrong. I went to Ptolemy asking to be excused from the morning exercises under the pretense that I had an upset stomach. It was obvious he didn't believe me but he gave his accent. Probably he also noticed that something was wrong and decided it was wise that somebody else did the investigation. Ptolemy is always like that, likes when others do his job and he just reaps the result. In any way, I am not complaining. If Alexander didn't want to talk, and Aristotle was hiding, I surmised you were the next one to approach on the matter. Though I personally think Aristotle's lectures on logic are waste of time, I think on this particular occasion he would be proud of my conclusions. What do you say?"
"I am leaving," Hephaistion broke the silence and, turning around, sat on the bed despite all the discomfort such a position caused him.
"You are clearly in pain," Perdiccas stated the obvious, "what's wrong? And what do you mean you're leaving?"
Hephaistion didn't answer. He rested his closed fists on the both sides of his body thus trying to shift his weight onto the parts of his body that didn't hurt. He hung his head down not wanting Perdiccas to see the signs of pain, closed eyes and tightly pressed lips. The effort brought temporally relief but he couldn't remain in that position for a long time.
"No need to be a hero. I think you should lay back," suggested Perdiccas.
"I don't care about what you think."
"Fair enough but is it a reason to hurt yourself?"
"If you so care about me, can't you do me a favor and leave?"
"As I already said, I came here because of Alexander, not because of you," Perdiccas challenged his friend, "and I am not leaving till I get the answers."
"Fine. Will you leave if I tell you what happened?"
"Sure."
"Aristotle and I were having sex. Alexander came in, didn't like what he saw, and accused me of being a trump, then left. Aristotle got angry, accused me of not closing the door, raped me, then gave me some sleeping potion, then you woke me up. Satisfied? Now leave."
"Oh…..," Perdiccas stared at Hephaistion in disbelieve. "It's not what I expected."
"Sorry to disappoint you. Can you leave now?"
"No. What you're going to do?"
"None of your business. You promised to leave."
"As my little brother likes to say, promises are like the bread crusts, are made to be broken."
"I see, treachery runs in the family," calmly stated Hephaistion and stood up. "Then I will make you to leave." The pain was significant but bearable. He took a few steps that separated him from Perdiccas and swung his arm aiming for a nose.
Perdiccas managed to escape. "Seriously? Don't be an idiot! Why won't you go back to the bed? Maybe you're right, I can't help you. I am going to fetch Aristotle to take care of your wounds. Bye."
"You will do no such thing!"
"Well, then, you have to return to the bed, lay on your side and we'll talk and figure out what to do," calmly said Perdiccas nudging Hephaistion to follow his instructions.
The son of Amyntor jerked his hand out of Perdiccas' grasp but returned to the bed, grudgingly allowing his friend to help him to find the less painful position.
"That about Theophrastos, does he know?" Perdiccas asked when he saw Hephaistion lay still; though he faced in Perdiccas' direction, his eyes were closed.
"Probably," whispered Hephaistion, "but they should have asked for your advice coming up with more plausible excuses."
"Tell me about it," Perdiccas chuckled. "Are you hungry? Thirsty?"
"Not much. There is some wine and water in the small cellar. Take right in the corridor that leads out of this room and you'll see curtain that hides the steps down."
"Sure, I will be right back. Don't go anywhere," said Perdiccas and left the room.
"You're a real joker, you know," Hephaistion said grudgingly. The initial resentment webbed away and suddenly he became grateful for Perdiccas' visit. Even if his priority was Alexander's and not his own well-being, Perdiccas was a no-bullshit person whose presence, for some unexplained reason, appealed to Hephaistion the most.
Soon his comrade was back, bringing with him not only the wine and water but also some cheese and olives.
"Found those in the cellar too, I hope your hunger will overcome your stubbornness. Can you move further into the bed?"
Hephaistion moved back slowly and Perdiccas spread out some cloth on the bed that also became improvised table. He mixed water with wine and gave to Hephaistion to drink.
"Was Aristotle rough with you before?" Perdiccas asked in a casual tone as if they were discussing weather.
After a short time, Hephaistion answered, looking somewhere past Perdiccas.
"It was our first time."
"Oh…."
"It was fine before Alexander showed up. I was almost going to enjoy it, I think. Can't understand why Aristotle reacted as he did after Alexander's leave. The prince may not be interested in sex but surely he knows what it's about. No way has he never witnessed something like that before, especially considering his father proclivities."
"Alexander keeps Aristotle to the higher standards and Aristotle knows it."
"If Alexander doesn't like or doesn't feel need for sex yet, it doesn't mean that the rest of us should refrain from engaging in it. Stop spoiling Alexander by letting him think the world revolves around his persona."
"Say that to Olympias."
"Whatever. The moment I am capable of walking a distance, I am out of here. I should have done it in the first place and not to succumb to yours and Theophrastos' entreats."
"You think your guardian god will protect you?"
"What guardian god?"
"The one whose image is engraved on that stone that hangs around your neck. What's his name?"
Hephaistion wanted to answer that it wasn't an image of his guardian god and that he didn't even know the name of the deity but suddenly he felt it would be a betrayal of the poor boy memory. "His name is Teitu," Hephaistion said mixing reality and fantasy together bestowing on the unknown deity the name of the long dead boy.
"I never heard of such a god and the name doesn't even sound Greek."
"He is local to where I lived. I don't remember much but my father told me I liked to play around his small sanctuary, this is why he bought this amulet for me before we left Theodosia. His is a really sad story." Hephaistion invented the explanation.
"Tell me."
"Why?"
"Just to pass the time."
"You could have at least said you were interested to know."
"I could have. So?"
Hephaistion scoffed but there was no malice. "You are impossible."
"I know. So, the story?"
"Very well," agreed Hephaistion silently reasoned with himself that he was going to do so in order to preserve Teitu's memory not to satisfy Perdiccas' curiosity. "Maybe one day my fanciful invention will spread outside of Mieza grounds and people will remember Teitu, it's the least I can do for him," thought Hephaistion.
"Many years ago Teitu, a high spirited boy of nine summers, happily lived with his family on the shores of the Eúxeinos Póntos, near what later became the city of Theodosia. His life was a bliss until one day he was kidnapped by pirates who were always abandon in those waters. The pirates sold him to slavers who sold him to a rich Persian Satrap who bought a group of young slaves to turn them to eunuchs, as was Persian habit from the times immortal, or so the story goes. Sometime before that, the same Satrap whose name is lost to history, was entertaining a friend from a foreign land who was exiled from his own land by a vicious king for some unknown reason. The Satrap was very powerful but he also had a lot of enemies and one of them decided to take advantage of that visit and accused the Satrap of conspiring with enemies. The accusation was made in private so the Satrap knew nothing about it. Though the King decided not to believe in the treason, he also decided to be on the safe side and ordered secretly to kidnap Satrap's guest and kill him. The order was carried out without delay but the Guest, suspecting a foul play, managed to warn his son to hide."
Hephaistion stopped his narrative suddenly afraid that he revealed too much of the truth. He cast a glance in Perdiccas' direction but it seemed that his friend didn't suspect anything unusual. Hephaistion continued, carefully taking the story in the direction that was quite different from the truth.
"Trying to escape, the Guest's son hid in a random tent but unfortunately it happened to be the tent where Teitu and other boys were kept and he was castrated together with other boys. After the mutilation, the Guest's son fell really sick, his remaining private parts became infected and Teitu was the one who took care of him. Unfortunately, it didn't help and the boy died of his wounds. Though the young pretty boys came cheap and Satrap was rich, each such death was supposed to be reported to him. The servant who came to the Satrap to report the death found his master in a really bad mood. He just became aware that his Guest was killed on the secret orders from the King and though the same King assured him of his continuing benevolence, the Satrap was angry because he really treasured the relationship with his Guest.
The Satrap became even more upset when he realized that the only boy who died from castration was the son of his Guest who was also under his protection. Nobody could explain how the boy ended up where he did. Teitu saw that the Satrap was really upset by the death of his short lived friend and because he had a really good heart, he told the Satrap about the last days of the boy. In gratitude, the Satrap took Teitu under his special protection. He provided for his education, he let him train with his own sons and eventually appointed Teitu the overseer of his vast estate. Because the Satrap was constantly either with his King or at war, Teitu became the virtual master of the Satrapy. He made sure that no more boys were castrated, since he considered it cruelty and he dealt severely with pirates who plundered the waters of the Eúxeinos Póntos.
Time passed and the Satrap was killed in one of the numerous wars. His sons treated Teitu well and wanted him to remain the Overseer but Teitu felt it was time to return to his own land. The Satrap's sons were reluctant to let him go but in the end they respected his wishes and sent him on his way home with many treasures. Teitu returned safely to his land; his parents were dead and he learned that his brothers and sisters all were killed in the raid many years ago. Because he couldn't have his own children, he established an orphanage in the memory of the boy whom he barely knew but whose death turned his own life around. The orphanage became sanctuary and Teitu lived many years taking care of everybody who managed to escape the clutches of slavers. When he died of a very old age, the tradition continued for centuries but with years the money run out and though the memory was preserved, the sanctuary existed no more, only the legend remained. Some say that Teitu was the name of the boy who died and that Satrap's Overseer took his name trying to preserve the memory. It is also said that before the boy died, he left Teitu the image of the unknown deity from his own land, just like this one and that Teitu asked the carvers to reproduce the image and he gave such a medallion to each boy whom he took in. The medallions are still sold in Theodosia by some vendors."
"Sad story indeed," Perdiccas said breaking the uncomfortable silence that hang in the room after Hephaistion finished with his narrative, "but I think you're taking a wrong lesson from it."
"What do you mean?"
"You want to return back to Theodosia, don't you? Just like Teitu did. But you can't do it just yet."
"Why not?"
"In your story, Teitu only returned back home after serving many years to the Satrap who saved him and bringing back riches he earned. Think about it, what would Teitu be able to accomplish if he run away after he was castrated? Nothing. If you drew parallels between Teitu's castration and you being violated by Aristotle, you yet have to find a friend to take care of you and a Satrap to serve. You're not yet ready to return."
"I don't wish to serve any Satrap let alone watch my friend die from a similar fate. And it is not why I told you this story."
"I know, it was because I asked about the medallion. Maybe gods made me ask."
"You didn't strike me as gods' fearful person."
"I pay them proper respect, despite all Aristotle says on the matter."
"Maybe. But I can't stay here."
"Why not?"
"Would you stay?"
"I don't know….."
"You are not helping."
"I don't want you to stay because it is what I would do. I want you to stay for your own reasons."
"I fail to see any."
"Then look harder."
"Go away, Perdiccas. I don't know what are you even doing here or why I talk to you."
"Are you angry with me because we didn't talk much since Alexander's return?"
"We didn't talk at all, period. Not that I needed your constant hovering, but… it's like we didn't know each other. I had more interactions from Attalos and Hegelochus. And now you're here trying to convince me to stay knowing what Aristotle did to me. How do you think I am even supposed to behave among others?"
"No different from how you behaved yesterday. Or do you think I am going to tell everybody what happened between you, Aristotle and Alexander? Do I look like Harpalos to you?"
"Not Harpalos but maybe a little like Amphoteros."
"What do you mean?"
"He told me about your little stint in King Philip's bedroom."
"It was not a secret, I told you before that Alexander's father took me as his eromenos."
"Yeah, but you skipped the part where you found yourself a substitute for the King's appetites."
"What did Amphoteros tell you?"
"Well, the truth, or what he told me was the truth. Care to add any details?"
"No. No one was supposed to know. How that bitch found out?"
"I am not sure why you calling Amphoteros that."
"Are you his friend now?"
"I am nobody's friend. And nobody's is mine."
"Fair enough. How did he know?"
"Harpalos told him."
"Why?"
"He wanted a place in his brother's bed."
"Figures. Stupid bugger, good for nothing except wiggling his tongue and his butt."
"I've heard Alexander tends to defend him."
Perdiccas stared somewhere past Hephaistion. "The Prince sometimes has a misplaced sense of honour. It surely wasted on Harpalos. What would you say if I go and bring Theophrastos here?"
"Why?"
"To tend to your wounds. I've heard…. this kind of wounds can become infected too."
"Maybe it will be for the better if I simply die."
"I won't allow you to wallow in self-pity. You are not the first one and not the last to be raped, including by your own eromenos. Suck it up. Why do you think Aristotle didn't show up today for the lectures?"
"Not because of me. I assume he needed time figuring out how to face Alexander…. so not to hurt the poor boy's feelings."
"Don't mock Alexander like that!"
"You defending him, Perdiccas?!"
"I don't see how it was his fault."
"You don't see?! You're a real piece of work, you know. And truth be told, I hate you even more than all the rest. You slither into people's confidences, you…. Where are you going?!"
"I told you, to fetch Theophrastos," calmly responded Perdiccas standing up.
"Do you really think I will allow you to do that?!" yelped Hephaistion trying to catch piece of Perdiccas' clothing but son of Orontes was fast enough to escape. Overcoming the pain, Hephaistion slid from the bed and run to catch up Perdiccas. He shut the pain off and rushed forward. Not hindered by pain, Perdiccas was faster but opening the door that led outside, he collided with Aristotle.
"What's going on here?" Philosopher asked in a cold voice.
Hephaistion froze on the spot and the sudden movement didn't go unnoticed.
"You shouldn't be up," Aristotle directed the reprimand towards Hephaistion. "Please return to the bed so that I can take a proper care of you. Perdiccas, leave us."
"No," came the daring answer.
"I beg your pardon?" Aristotle asked in disbelieve.
"Theseus asked for my company so I should stay here."
"What you should do is to follow my instructions."
"Should I report to Alexander then?" haughtily asked Perdiccas, the unspoken threat obvious to all the present.
"I thought you would know better," Aristotle stared at his pupil trying to estimate the plausibility of the threat actually being carried out.
Whether the ominous warning was real or not, Perdiccas grew up in Hephaistion's respect. He didn't feel the escalating the situation further would serve any real purpose so he said, "I am fine, Perdiccas. Though I welcomed the distraction, it's better if you return to your scheduled training. Aristotle and I have some things to discuss and there is no need to involve Alexander. The two of us can resume our storytelling later."
"Are you sure?" asked Perdiccas fully aware of the evident disrespect towards Aristotle.
"Quite so," assured him Hephaistion.
Perdiccas nodded, "See you later then," and continued towards the door.
Both Aristotle and Hephaistion watched Perdiccas to leave. When the boy was gone, they stared at each other, Aristotle with embarrassment and Hephaistion with a face devoid of any emotions.
"I am sorry about yesterday," at last managed Aristotle.
"Your feelings mean nothing to me," said Hephaistion and turned away.
"Somebody has to take care of your wounds. I understand that you might not want this person to be me, but I said nothing to Theophrastos. I didn't want you to be upset about others knowing."
"Really? I think it is a little too late to worry about my feelings," coldly stated Hephaistion.
"I didn't mean it….I really didn't mean it."
Despite his hatred towards the man, Hephaistion thought it strange that the philosopher wanted to apologise. He shifted from one feet to another, he found it painful to stand long in the same position. Aristotle noticed the movement and knew exact reason for it. He looked past Hephaistion and said, "If you allow me to take care of your wounds, they will heal in a few days. You will be able to return to your normal activities as if nothing happened. I mean….. you know…. physically."
"No."
"Then… the wounds will take longer to heal and…. Infection can get it….it is really painful and unpleasant, or worse." Hearing no response, he suggested, "Do you want me to tell Theophrastos so that he can take care of you?"
"No."
"I can ask the local physician."
"No."
"Then what you want me to do?"
"Suddenly I am the one to decide?"
Aristotle sighed, "I meant it when I said I didn't mean it. I don't know what possessed me. I really care about you and wanted the first experience to be pleasant and leave you wanting for more. Alexander's intrusion unbalanced me. Can you at least go and lay on the bed, please."
Hephaistion was about to do the same before Aristotle asked him but now he didn't want to appear to follow Aristotle's orders. He remained on spot, uncertain, feeling the unwelcomed dizziness encroaching on his senses. He realized that if he stayed like that longer, he may lost consciousness and then for sure he will be left at Aristotle's mercy. He carefully walked back towards the bed and slowly lay down. Aristotle didn't try to help him.
"I will brew you something that will make you to feel better, stronger; stay here," trying to sound dispassionate, said the philosopher and left.
Hephaistion settled in the comfortable position on his stomach and closed his eyes trying to put a barrier between himself and reality. What he was to do? Leave right now? He won't make it far and it would be an easy way out just to lay under some tree and wait for the death either from infection or hunger, or both. Such death would be long and painful unless he can find some sharp object to slit his throat first. He wasn't afraid of death or pain, it was the cowardice of the escape act that deterred him. Besides, the fictional story of Teitu that he invented to cover the truth, brought back memories of the past. Did he overcome and survive so many perils just to end up cutting his own throat in humiliation and self-pity under some random tree along the nameless road? Or should he swallow the offence and forgive Aristotle in order to survive? But what he was going to do with this survival? The thoughts swirled in his mind without offering any solution.
In the end, when Aristotle returned with a promised brew, Hephaistion drank it.
"Did you tell Perdiccas what happened?" the philosopher asked.
Feeling no need to hide the truth and suspecting that it would make Aristotle uncomfortable, Hephaistion simply said, "Yes, I did."
"Well, let's hope he is smart enough not to share it with Alexander. As much as I want it, I won't touch you, I promise; I won't touch you unless you allow me to do so."
"You really think I will feel any inclination for any intimacy with you, after what you did to me?" Hephaistion asked in disbelieve. "You're either lying to me or to yourself!"
"You're still young and unexperienced. Sex sometimes can be rough. Some even like it rough."
"I am pretty sure I didn't."
"It was my mistake to get rough with you the first time. I accept it. I promise it will be different next time. You'll see."
"There never going to be the next time."
"You're forgetting you agreed to be my eromenos and as such, you have to submit to me. But as I said, I promise not to resort to force. And I can give you some respite. My wife miscarried a few months ago. I think we should try for another child. I am giving her some herbs that will help her to get pregnant. It is a known remedy….." Aristotle voice became distant and Hephaistion felt drifting away into some place where there was no pain and humiliation.
"Theseus, it's me, your favorite rooster, wake up! Theseus!"
Hephaistion surfaced back to reality and when he instinctively opened his eyes, he found himself staring into Perdiccas' face. He blinked several times trying to make sense of reality.
"Ah, you're back," Perdiccas smiled.
"I thought you left," Hephaistion frowned, confused.
"I did," Perdiccas nodded, "then I came back. Well, Aristotle asked me to come back. To watch over you."
"Watch over me? Why? I fell asleep, didn't I? Aristotle dragged me, didn't he?" asked Hephaistion with horror.
"Yes, he did," confirmed Perdiccas, "but I don't think it was in order to violate you. He wanted to administer some medicine to you but he knew you wouldn't submit voluntarily."
"Whose side are you on now? And how did you know he…. didn't do anything to me again?"
"He said so and I believe him."
"Do you now?" Hephaistion stared at Perdiccas with mistrust, "and what reason did he give you?"
"Eh, he said he wanted to win your trust back. It makes sense, I don't think he intended to rape you, it just happen."
"It just happen….," echoed Hephaistion, "I can't believe you're actually saying it! You are either an idiot, which I doubt, or….. of course! How I didn't see it before!"
"What exactly you didn't see?"
"Why I would even presume you cared about what happened to me?! It is all about Alexander, isn't it? You don't want him to find out and get even more upset! It is one thing for him to happen upon us unexpectedly and another thing to learn Aristotle actually raped me, that he is just like his father, his esteemed teacher. How I couldn't see it before! I am such a fool! I almost deserve what happened to me, such a trusting idiot!" Hephaistion stared at Perdiccas in anger and seeing the boy didn't move from his position, threw the blankets away.
There was far less pain than in the morning. Aristotle's medicine, whatever it was, got the desired effect but Hephaistion didn't feel any gratitude for the fact. Noticing his clothes folded neatly nearby, he started to dress up in silence.
"What are you doing?" asked Perdiccas with alarm.
"I am done explaining my actions to you. Go away."
"Theseus, don't do anything stupid," seriously said Perdiccas.
Hephaistion managed to curb the outburst of anger that was building inside him. Following his desire to express his contempt to somebody he once believed was his friend would only prolong the unnecessary torture. When he was done with dressing and putting the sandals on, he stepped past Perdiccas as if he didn't exist and headed in the direction of exit.
"Wait," Perdiccas called but his plea was ignored.
Hephaistion made it to the front door but when he opened it, there was another visitor outside. Only it was not Aristotle like in the morning, but Alexander.
"What? Is it the only place in Mieza that anybody thinks to visit?" Spat Hephaistion in disgust. "Don't you have to discuss the perfectness of Macedonian way of life or dissect some caterpillar? No?" Not hearing or seeing any response from the stunned prince he tried to push his way out but Alexander just stood there, barring the exit.
"Let me pass or I will make you let me pass," threatened Hephaistion.
"I thought we could talk," said Alexander at last, some hesitance in his voice.
"There is nothing to talk about. Step aside."
"It is not a way to talk to your prince," rebuked Alexander.
"My prince?" Hephaistion exploded. "What made you think so? I won't repeat twice, let me pass."
"Theseus, please, you're not making yourself any favors by talking to Alexander like that," advised Perdiccas.
Feeling trapped between two adversaries, Hephaistion felt a hot white fury to possess him. He whirled around and punched Perdiccas with his right fist into the jaw. Not expecting such a reaction and never witnessing the real strength of Hephaistion's body, Perdiccas was taken completely by surprise and didn't have time to react. He staggered back and would fell if not for Alexander who managed to slip around Hephaistion and catch his friend.
"Are you out of your mind?" Alexander moved on Hephaistion after letting Perdiccas rather gently down on the floor.
Hephaistion ignored the prince completely and turned back to the door.
"I asked you a question," demanded Alexander catching Hephaistion by the folds of his chiton.
Son of Amyntor tried to get rid of this unwanted hindrance but Alexander was persistent. Though smaller than his opponent, he got good fighting skills that he never doubted and the feeling of standing up for a friend impaired his otherwise rather sound judgement. Soon both were on the floor, viciously fighting almost as if their life was depending on the outcome. Alexander overestimated his abilities though even if he knew that Hephaistion was stronger he would still step in to defend his friend. Hephaistion was indeed stronger and used to the street fights with no rules or reservations. After a short struggle he managed to subdue the prince who, though still trying to wiggle free, was completely in Hephaistion's power.
The son of Amyntor realized his triumph was going to be short lived. In the corner of his eye he saw that Perdiccas was coming to his senses and expected him to jump to prince's defence any moment. He couldn't fight them both at the same time so he had to make sure Alexander was out of commission. Hephaistion was in such a crazed state of mind that he hardly realized what he was doing. He grabbed prince by the hair and yanked his head up. Viciously scowling at Alexander's terrified look, he smacked his head with such a force against the floor that there was no more resistance and Hephaistion felt that the prince's body became limp under him.
Shaking, he stood from the floor, staring at some confusion at the lifeless body of Alexander.
"What… what did you do to him?" Perdiccas whispered in horror. "Why Alexander is not moving?" Not bothering to stand up, Perdiccas crawled to where the prince lied, motionless.
"Alexander, Alexander," Perdiccas gently rocked prince's shoulder and then carefully turned him over. Philip's son was unconscious.
"Oh, gods, you must have cracked his skull," Perdiccas screamed, panicking.
"Is he dead?" asked Hephaistion with dread.
"I don't know," mumbled Perdiccas and started to shake the prince, "Alexander, please, wake up."
"Don't shake him," said Hephaistion, suddenly realizing the gravity of situation, "It can make things worse. Stay with him, I will fetch help; if he starts vomiting, turn him carefully on the side, so he won't inhale. I'll be back soon."
Hephaistion rushed outside and sprinted to Aristotle's cottage. Midway, he met Ptolemy who was lecturing Nearchos and Laomedon on something. Not getting into any details but not wanting panicking Perdiccas to be left with Alexander alone, he shouted that Alexander was hurt and he was running to get help. Ptolemy didn't need to be asked twice and immediately run in the direction pointed out by Hephaistion who continued on his way. Luckily, both Aristotle and Theophrastos were where Hephaistion hoped they would be and he immediately blurted what happened. Both rushed back with Hephaistion, sick with worry.
When they arrived at the premises, they found it swarming with other students and soldiers. Alexander was no longer on the floor of the entrance room and somebody advised them that the prince was moved to the bedroom. They hurried inside and found Alexander on the bed, the prince was still unconscious.
"Arrest him!" Hephaistion heard Ptolemy's sour voice and accusing finger pointed at his direction.
Immediately the guards who were waiting inside, closed on Hephaistion and grasped his arms, bringing them painfully back. The son of Amyntor didn't resist but managed to cross looks with Perdiccas, "Is he alive?" The son of Orontes ignored the question and turned away from dismayed Hephaistion.
Once outside, the guards knocked Hephaistion to the ground and turning him on his back, grabbed him by his ankles and started to run. Hephaistion involuntary screamed in pain from being dragged in such a manner over the ground. He tried to protect himself from being hurt trying to support himself with his hands that were left untied but the effort didn't bring much relief. The guards run fast but mercifully not far. But now Hephaistion was too disoriented to know where he was. He saw the walls of some building, the door flung open with the kick of the guards' feet and then he was mercilessly pushed down the stairs, helplessly rolling down, his already badly injured body and head hitting each single one of the steps. By the time he hit the ground, he was already unconscious.
Hephaistion came back from oblivion when somebody throw a bucket of water over him. Then there was another. Hephaistion gasped for air and tried to shield himself from the outpour but realized he couldn't do so. He found himself in painful and uncomfortable position – his arms twisted behind his back and shackled to some sort of the pole. His body was protruding forward at some weird angle because he was on his knees with his feet also shackled to the floor. This painful upright position was sustained by his shoulders that hurt like Hades together with the rest of his body.
"Who sent you to kill the prince?" the question came together with the heavy blow to his face.
Hephaistion tried to shake his head in negative motion but it was met with another blow to his face.
"Don't strike hard or he will be out before we have our revenge," some other voice came from different direction and the next blow was to his stomach. Hephaistion retched spewing the vomit at his attackers. Another blow mercifully made him unconscious.
x
When Hephaistion came around next time, he was alone in almost absolute the darkness. There was a flicker of light somewhere but Hephaistion found it hard to judge the distance. "Maybe it's a lantern on Charon's boat," he thought wishfully but the pain that washed over his body made him realize the mistake. His hands were still tied behind his back, but this time his body wasn't attached to the pole; he was laying on the stone floor sparsely covered by some hay. His legs still were shackled to the floor but he had some room to move them around. His head hurt, every tiny piece of his body hurt, both inside and outside.
"Why couldn't they simply finish me?" with desperation thought Hephaistion. "Or they are saving me for more torture? If the prince died, surely they want to keep me alive and bring to Pella for public execution. The Thracians probably got some reprieve from Macedonian troops, King Philip would return to be present at his son's funerals, or would he? I shouldn't give the satisfaction of torturing me all the way long. If I just can hold my breath long enough to suffocate….." He tried but it was easier said than done, despite his most strenuous efforts, his mouth came open in involuntary motion, lungs screaming for air. He tried it again and again, hoping that after a number of times his strength will ebb away and he will be gone. Some weird images started to appear in front of his eyes, and Hephaistion shut them closed or at least he thought so. He wasn't sure though. The images continued to dance and he couldn't determine whether he was actually seeing something or it was inside his head. The images slowed and faded away, leaving only darkness and cold.
x
"Theseus, are you awake?" the voice that Hephaistion thought he knew but couldn't quite place came from somewhere.
"No need to stand on ceremony with him," somebody growled and Hephaistion was brought back to reality by somebody's vicious kick on his shins.
"Your presence is no longer required here," the first voice admonished and Hephaistion realized it was Theophrastos.
"Can you sit?" the former custodian asked him.
"Why?"
"I brought you something to eat and drink."
"Why?"
"You need to regain your strength."
"Why? Can't somebody simply drag me to my execution place?"
"You are not going to be executed."
Hephaistion contemplated this announcement for some moments and realized that the only logical explanation could be that Alexander was still alive.
"I don't need to regain my strength. You can finish me right in this cell. And if you're too squirmy about the job, I am sure the eager volunteers can be found easily.
"Prince Alexander doesn't seek your death."
"How noble of him," Hephaistion tried to convey the appropriate sarcasm but wasn't sure of his success. Still, he was glad the prince was alive. The poor boy managed to get in the wrong place at the wrong time twice in the last few days. Ultimately, it wasn't his fault.
"Theseus, when you started to become so antagonistic?"
"When? You really want to know when?" the resentment gave him strength that he really didn't have. "I can tell you exactly when. It happen when you decided to please your former erastes and bring me to him as an offering."
"Theseus, I didn't bring you here just to please Aristotle. I sincerely hoped such an opportunity would be very beneficial for you. You could have achieve so much but now I am afraid it's not going to happen."
"It was never going to happen," whispered Hephaistion. The flash of anger was short lived and deprived him of the remnants of his strength.
"Just because you did everything in your power and beyond to antagonize every living creature in Mieza. But it's not why I am here. I came to take care of your wounds and make sure you eat so that you can endure your punishment."
"My punishment? Then what do you call all that was done to me before?"
"You do realize you almost killed the prince?"
"Well, if he wasn't coddled by everybody else around him into thinking he is the best, then maybe he could have learnt to take care of himself." Hephaistion knew he wasn't fair to the prince but he didn't care and why would he?
"You didn't learn anything, did you?"
When Hephaistion didn't answer, Theophrastos continued. "Everybody wanted you to be brought to Pella for proper punishment and exemplary execution. You would have been tortured for the information on your co-conspirators. But Alexander insisted you didn't mean to harm him, it was an accident. For some time even the Prince interference wasn't enough because everybody lusted for your blood. You are lucky that Alexander was well enough to voice his opinion and that he managed to persuade others to show some mercy instead of insisting on even harsher punishment."
"I am not interested in listening for you singing dithyrambs for the prince. Can you be done already with announcing the punishment?"
Theophrastos sighed, "I wish I could help you, Theseus. You have to learn to look at yourself before blaming others for your misfortunes."
Hephaistion turned away, he didn't want Theophrastos seeing the tears that he tried to stop in vain. "Blaming others for my misfortunes?" he thought bitterly, was it really how the rest of the world saw him?
"Just say your piece and be gone," Hephaistion said as firm as he could trying to hide the tremor of his voice with rudeness of his words.
"Very well. In the morning you will be taken to the main courtyard and given twenty lashes. After that you will be taken from Mieza premises, banished forever from Macedon, never allowed to return."
"Who said I would ever want to return? I never wanted to come here in the first place. Anyway, I hope I won't survive the lashing so, if you want to do me a favor, ask them to strike hard."
Hephaistion was too weak to resist Theophrastos ministrations so he allowed his former mentor to treat his wounds but he refused to eat. He sipped the offered drink hoping there were some poppy seeds inside so he can slip back into oblivion before his punishment next morning. Either his drink was indeed spiked or he fell asleep because his body wasn't able to sustain his wakefulness, Hephaistion wasn't sure. He woke up because somebody wake him up while taking the shackles off. Why anybody would think that he was still a threat was beyond Hephaistion's understanding but he stopped caring. After some time he was hurled over the shoulder of some soldier and brought back to the daylight and then to the place of his punishment. He was stripped naked, not a thread of clothing was left on his body, and then he was tied up to some sort of the rack. The stick was shoved between his teeth so that he won't bite through his lips though Hephaistion found such a precaution laughable. He was prepared to die and his only regret was that somebody was cruel enough to yank the cord with the image of Teitu's god from his neck. He idly wondered if it was Perdiccas' idea to inflict the last piece of suffering on him but the thought was drowned in the scourging pain when the first lash ended on Hephaistion's back. Defiant to the last moment, Hephaistion started to count the strikes but soon he became confused and passed out of sheer pain.
The pain was still there, how could it be? Hephaistion wondered, confused. He tried to move and heard a moan. Was it his own? Where he was and why there was so much light? "Anybody's here? Hey…."
He heard the chair moved and somebody approaching. "You're back to the land of the living, welcome back!" Theophrastos' voice was annoyingly cheerful.
"Where am I?"
"This is my dwelling in Mieza. This is my study room, I hoped that the scrolls will facilitate your healing."
"Wasn't I supposed to be banished from Mieza?"
"Yes, you are but first you needed to heal, at least somewhat. Alexander insisted though Ptolemy wanted you to be kicked out directly from the rack. You were out for two days. I think you will be ready to travel in a day or two."
"How considerate. Didn't I ask for a favor of being killed? Why couldn't you accommodate my last wish?"
"Because I didn't want it to be your last wish. Despite what you think, nobody hates you, Theseus. You have to know that you passed out after the eleventh lash and this is when you were taken off the rack. There was no point in punishment if you couldn't endure it."
"You expect me to be grateful?"
"It's up to you. Now, lay still while I treat your wounds."
Hephaistion didn't have the strength to argue. So, the gods decreed that he would survive. How funny. If anybody on the Mt. Olympos expected gratitude, none was coming. Hephaistion pressed his lips. Be what will be. He will endure. He yet has to discover what was the reason, if there was one, but at least he wouldn't need to suffer the presence of egoistical mentors, self-serving philosophers, treacherous friends and the prince who was under the impression that everybody loved him. A few more days and he will never see any of them again. It was a relief.
And so Hephaistion endured. Suddenly the prospect of unknown life, hopefully less cruel that the one he was leaving behind sounded very attractive and Hephaistion started to look forward to it. Three days later, in the wee hours of dawn, he was helped by Theophrastos into the cart of some poor merchant who, according to his mentor's farewell words was paid to take him outside Macedon and bring him somewhere to Thessaly where it will be completely up to him what he could managed to do with his life. The merchant was supposed to feed him on the way but otherwise Hephaistion was completely on his own, with no belongings and no means of sustenance. Still, Hephaistion was sure he was going to survive. If Theophrastos expected to get any thanks or any farewell words, he got none. The cart soon disappeared out of view and the silent Hephaistion became a distant memory.
The cheerful mood Hephaistion managed to get himself into when climbing into the cart soon became a memory. Maybe it was because of the quietness of the road they were on or because Hephaistion realized there was very little reason for joy. Suddenly, the cart came to the abrupt stop and he heard the neighing of the horse that somehow Hephaistion knew wasn't the wretched nag that pulled the cart.
"Hey ho, I knew I would eventually catch up with you," the cheerful voice announced.
"If Macedonian cavalry horses have difficulty beating this poor excuse of a mare, I don't know how you expect to win in any wars!"
"Ha, I never told you I wanted to be in the cavalry."
"It is not such a hard guess knowing how you and Alexander are attached at the hip."
"We are not," Perdiccas merrily scowled.
"How is your jaw?"
"Still pains me to kiss."
Hephaistion snorted but then fell silent. It was the Perdiccas from the first days in Mieza he would miss but not the one he became when Alexander came back. The initial cheerfulness of seeing somebody he not so long time ago thought of as a friend disappeared to be replaced by the sour memories of the more recent past.
"Why are you here?" Hephaistion broke the silence first.
"Couldn't come to see you off, officially. I was forbidden, but prohibitions don't sit well with me, you know. Anyway, I brought you little something. Can't change what already happened and I really sorry to see you go. Maybe our paths will cross in the future and I hope we won't stare at each other across the enemy line."
Hephaistion shuddered, it was almost the same phrase Mazaeus said to him when bidding his own goodbye but his brooding was interrupted by the merry jingle of something inside something. Hephaistion looked back at Perdiccas. He was holding a leather pouch, rather heavy, judging by its size.
"If you expect me to accept it, you're sadly mistaken," firmly said Hephaistion though he knew that his proud rejection was a stupid sentiment to voice.
Instead of being discouraged, Perdiccas broadly smiled, "that was exactly what I expected to hear but you didn't listen to my offer till the end.'
"There is nothing on this earth that will make me to accept your charity."
"Then you don't mind listening to it till the end?" Perdiccas grinned.
"Fine, what is it?"
"You either take the whole pouch or you take none of it, not a single piece."
"It's not a difficult choice, I am not taking it."
"Swear?"
"Yes, yes; now be gone."
"Aren't you going to look inside?"
"Why? I am not going to take it."
"Then it won't hurt to look, will it?'
"Fine, show it to me."
"Here," Perdiccas gave him the pouch, still grinning from ear to ear.
Hephaistion took the thing from Perdiccas' hands and opened it. On top of the shiny coins, loosely wrapped in the newly cut leather strip was Teitu's amulet. Hephaistion stared at it in disbelieve and then looked at Perdiccas who smiled again and smugly asked, "Still not taking?"
"You bastard!"
"That I am, that I am," Perdiccas accepted the accusation.
"Well," Hephaistion fished the amulet from the pouch and put it around his neck. Then he tied the strings of the pouch back and dropped it to the ground.
"What are you doing?" frowned Perdiccas. "You promised!"
"As a younger brother of the person who once pretended to be my friend likes to say, promises like the bread crusts, are made to be broken."