Chapter Twenty-Nine

Jacques grit his teeth as he stood in front of the door to Theo's study, listening to the clinking of bottles hastily being hidden as he waited for Theo to open the door.

A week. That was how long it had been since Lady Mable had disappeared. A week for Theo, and the entire castle, to fall into decline.

The morning after the ball, when Maddie had gone to Lady Mable's room and found her missing, they had searched for her. He and his men had combed the forest. Labelle, Lune and the rest had hunted for her all throughout the castle, from the pantry all the way into the east and west turrets. Not one of them could find the wayward guest, who had departed as unexpectedly as she had arrived.

When he and Labelle told Theo that she was gone, he just looked at them with dull eyes and said, "Of course. That is what she wanted." He wouldn't explain any further, and had retreated to his rooms.

The only other person who didn't seem surprised was Madame Cecile. "Sometimes a heart has to be let go before it can find where it truly belongs." She told Monsieur Lune cryptically. They were all in too much shock to know, or care, what she meant by that.

The sorrow felt by the castle residents was palpable. Rooms went uncleaned, because Labelle was grieving too hard to care about keeping the maids on task. Maddie was no longer the energetic sprite they all loved, and spent the majority of the time in tears. Monsieur Lune was adept at keeping his feelings buried, but more than one of the menservants had been scowling as Jacques walked the castle hallways, the remnants of an uncharacteristic tongue-lashing from their leader. Monsieur Carnier didn't have the ability to keep his feelings hidden, and Jacques wouldn't be surprised if his entire staff up and resigned in the next few days. A lot of good it would do them.

And no one had seen Theo since the morning after the ball.

Jacques waited a few more heartbeats before letting himself into his childhood friend's study. His black eyes narrowed when he saw Theo sprawled in the chair in front of the fireplace, attempting to act nonchalant.

"Yes, please come in, Jacques." He said with heavy irony. He had managed to clean up most of the liquor bottles, but Jacques stared pointedly down near Theo's foot, where a half-drunk bottle had managed to escape.

"Labelle was worried about you." He told Theo blandly. Before Theo could so much as twitch, he reached down and snatched the bottle from the floor, shaking it a little in Theo's face. Theo slouched down, but not before Jacques noted how disheveled and grimy he was. "Well, I suppose I can tell Labelle you are alive, though you certainly aren't in any state for more visitors." He sharpened his voice, hoping to goad Theo into an explanation for this condition.

In all their years of friendship, he had rarely seen Theo drink this heavily, and the results frightened him.

Theo blinked blearily at Jacques, his alcohol-fogged mind trying to figure out how Jacques had managed to get that bottle so quickly. He rather wished, despite his long friendship with the man, that he would simply go away and let him drink. He was tired, and it would take only a few more bottles of wine to get him so drunk that he could simply slip into unconsciousness rather than trying to fall asleep.

"I really don't care, Jacques," Theo said hoarsely. "Leave me alone. I'm trying to black out, and you are ruining it."

Jacques looked distressed and angry, two emotions that Theo was extremely familiar with. "Why do you even want to black out in the first place?" he snapped, knocking the bottle against his leg in impatience. "What is the matter with you?"

Theo stared at him. "I'm drunk," he stated stupidly. "That's what the matter with me." Theo was too inebriated to understand why Jacques slung the bottle across the room, causing it to erupt against the far wall.

"But why are you getting drunk in the first place? For a week you've been hiding from all of us, and this is what you have been doing? What could possibly have…" Jacques stopped. "Ah, so that's what this is." Jacques murmured, more to himself than to Theo. "You're trying to drink yourself to death because of her, aren't you?"

Theo's mind wasn't sober enough to keep a steady train of thought.

"What? Who?"

"Lady Mable." barked Jacques, startling Theo so much he nearly fell out of his chair. "This is what this is all about isn't it? It's been a week since she disappeared, and you're getting over it by drinking yourself into a stupor."

Theo tried to stand, and realized this wasn't such a good idea, since now he could see ten Jacques, not just one. Dizzy, he slumped back into his chair. "I'm trying to drink enough so I can just…pass out rather than toss and turn all night." He explained.

Jacques eyebrows raised with interest. "Tossing and turning? When did this start?"

"The night after the ball. After she left. I don't know, I don't know why I can't fall asleep. It just hurts too much when I'm not asleep. So I try to sleep, but when I do sleep when I'm sober, all that I dream about is her. I don't know why that is either. So I'm trying to drink enough so I can sleep, and sleep without dreaming." Theo wondered drearily if his explanation even made sense.

Apparently, it did, because Jacques stopped pacing, and even picked up another bottle and poured himself a drink. With the grace Theo lacked, he sat down on a nearby ottoman, across from Theo. "I know her departure is a disappointment, but there is still a chance that you might find the one who can break this curse." Theo was too inebriated to notice the deceptive pleasantness in Jacques voice. "Another woman might appear, and we will be free."

"I don't want…this isn't about the curse." Theo snapped. "I don't care about that. There was always a chance Mable would leave, but I just didn't expect it to happen so…suddenly."

Jacques frowned thoughtfully. "Yes, I was wondering about that too. I didn't think you two had managed to find a spell in your search, did you?"

Theo shook his head. "Not that I saw."

"Maybe she found one and used it without telling you."

Theo's response was automatic "She wouldn't do that. She cared about everyone too much to leave without saying goodbye. She isn't capable of that sort of cruelty."

Jacques wanted to smile, wanted to grin until his cheeks hurt, but he kept his face clear of emotion as he said, "Perhaps not. But perhaps she just wasn't the right person. I think we all knew she wasn't going to break the spell." He was delighted with Theo's annoyed growl. "I mean, she isn't exactly what we pictured, was she? When you and I sat back and thought about it, didn't we agree that the woman to break the curse should be blonde? And someone who didn't have such a volatile temper, naturally. No, no, she was quite unsuitable, no doubt about it. A pudgy, temperamental-" Jacques hadn't finished his sentence when Theo launched himself at him.

The two rolled on the floor, Theo grasping furiously at Jacques throat, and Jacques trying to keep Theo's fangs and claws at bay. Roughly, Jacques managed to push Theo off of him, and stumbled to his feet. Theo jerked away and crouched, baring his fangs in fury. Jacques, understanding that he had pushed his friend farther than he had ever meant to, reached for his sword, but Theo slammed into him and the two of them were on the floor again, groping for a handhold.

Power burst throughout the room fast and hot, pulling the two fighters apart, and slamming them into opposite directions. Madame Cecile stood between the two friends, arms crossed and foot tapping. Her green eyes sparkled with temper, and she threw her hair back out of her face haughtily. Jacques and Theo braced themselves for a terrifying lecture.

"What is going on here?" Madame Cecile's voice was quiet, but sounded so deadly it probably would have been better if she had shouted.

Theo backed up until he was against the wall. He was still plenty drunk, but the fight had sobered him a little. Jacques kept a hand on his sword, but his eyes were still on his childhood friend.

"It's my fault, Cecile. I was pushing him, trying to get him to admit something. I should have realized he was too drunk to be reasonable." said Jacques, placating. He winced as Madame Cecile shot him a scalding look.

"And what-" Cecile started, and was interrupted rudely by Theo.

"I wanted her to stay. There, was that what you wanted me to say? I wanted her to stay, but not because of the curse." Theo paced on his side of the room. "I don't care about the curse anymore. I don't care if it ever gets broken, because I honestly don't want any woman except her."

"Theo…" Jacques stepped forward, but Theo wasn't listening to him. He just paced back or forth, talking faster and faster. Jacques was glad he hadn't finished his drink, because the constant movement would have made him dizzy.

"But I couldn't tell her that. How can you tell someone who is so selfless, so intent on letting her family know she is all right, that you want her to stay because you don't think you could bear it if she left? I thought giving her the mirror would help."

"Your mother's mirror?" Jacques asked, with some surprise. Everyone knew about the mirror Master Acelin had given his wife as a wedding present. After his mother's death, Theo had demanded it be placed up in the attic, where he did not have to see it. Theo must have spent hours searching for it.

Theo nodded. "I thought that giving her a chance to see her father, to know he was safe and taken care of, would give her comfort and maybe she would be persuaded to stay. I should have known it wouldn't be enough." He continued to talk, but Jacques wasn't certain he was talking to them anymore. "I know her well enough by now. I know how compassionate she is. I know that when she loves someone she fights for them with everything she has. I should have known just seeing her family in the mirror wouldn't be enough."

"This is not your fault, Theo." Jacques said gently. Theo looked at him with tortured eyes.

"But it is. I know how hard she fights for those she loves, for people who are brave enough to acknowledge that they love her. But I wasn't brave enough." Theo's voiced hitched. "I was so afraid to tell her that I fell in love with her." Jacques saw Madame Cecile's eyes widen.

Theo wasn't looking at them anymore. He had stopped his relentless pacing, but was staring the fire with such desolation that it didn't do much to relieve Jacques's fear that Theo was spiraling out of control.

"I wanted to tell her that I loved her. I wanted to tell her that I thought she was beautiful, even though I know that she didn't think she was. I wanted to tell her that listening to her laugh was the best part of spending time with her. Or how much it meant to me that she didn't fear me like everyone else. How wonderful it was to watch her face light up when we found a hidden room in the castle." Theo's attempt at a chuckle was half-hysterical, and both Jacques and Madame Cecile crept towards him anxiously. "It honestly felt like the castle might have been falling in love with her too."

Madame Cecile made a jerky motion, and Jacques saw her mouth fall open as if to speak. But she didn't have the chance because Theo was turning to them, gold eyes glazed in misery.

"But I couldn't tell her that, not when I saw her face when she caught a glimpse of her father. Telling her that I love her would just make her feel obligated to stay, and it would have destroyed me even more if she felt that she had to stay with me. I knew that letting her go was the best thing, was the right thing to do." Theo stared at Jacques feverishly. "So, you'll have to forgive me, Jacques, because I do not care about that stupid curse. Letting her go is even worse than this," He gestured to his fur and claws. "because I know she could have broken the curse. I know that she said she wasn't the right person, but I could have told her that she was. I would have told her that she was wonderful, beautiful, perfect."

Jacques watched sadly as his best friend completely fell apart.

"I loved her," Theo howled mournfully, not even feeling the hands that were gently moving him into his bedroom and onto his bed, "I loved her and I let her go!"