Nice, warm weather with occasional cool, morning breezes residing in an active city simply bustling with life. Birds chirping in the distance. Ocean crashing into and receding from the sand at an almost stagnant pace. A seemingly perfect day, until you remember that Peridot is Lapis's punching bag, doomed to forever be prey to Lapis's unrelenting anger. And to top it all off, us Crystal Gems don't really care.

Yeah, Pearl will show concern here or there just to not seem like a dick, but the rest of us show our true colors. Amethyst will even make jokes about those two from time to time. Her personal favorite is one where she compares Lapis and Peridot's relationship to a meat tenderizer and ground beef. It's actually...odd. Not in the way you're thinking.

Garnet keeps saying that we should focus on our missions and let them solve it themselves. Garnet also thinks that us interfering would negatively impact the two and worsen things. She's obviously the most helpful one here, by a longshot. Ooowee, is she helpful. The literal representation of two alien carpet munchers merged together into a super alien carpet muncher tells us to not get involved, like that'll fix things.

Anyways, here I am, munching on some tasty ass pancakes, homemade, no Eggo. Fluffly as hell, right? Warm syrup poured all over? Maybe a little butter? Bacon on the side? OJ looking OK? Some fruit just in case? Has 'Great Breakfast' written all over it, does it not? You wanna know what could possibly make breakfast even better? A very serious situation active in the lives of many families that'll be glorified as some sort of joke. Honestly, dark humor is the best.

As I'm throat-deep into some thicc pancakes, Lapis and Peridot burst through the door. Lapis, feeling fresh and fulfilled, leads with a firm hand wrapped around a shy Peridot's arm. As Lapis tugs Peridot in, she takes in the delicious smells of a good breakfast.

"Smells great in here. Someone's finally learned how to cook." Lapis stated.

"Oh, ONE time, Lapis! I burned ONE meal. Let it go. Do you want any of these wretched discs, even though we gems don't need such torturous substances?" Pearl retorted.

"I'll take a couple."

Pearl placed two of the pancakes on a plate and put it on the table next to me.

"What about you, Peridot?" Pearl asked.

Just as Peridot was about to answer, Lapis cut her off, saying, "Peridot's on punishment from yesterday. She'll have no pancakes, bacon, juice, or whatever you have here."

"What, did she forget her place?" Amethyst snickered.

"That's private information."

"Sounds like she tried to leave the kitchen."

"That's enough, Amethyst." Garnet said.

Lapis tugged Peridot over to the table, sat her down and scooted in close to her. Peridot whined slightly, earning herself a pinch on the thigh from Mr. You-Made-Me-Do-This-To-You.

"What's on the agenda for today, G?" Amethyst asked.

"We've got some corrupted gems roaming the kindergarten to bubble, as well as the usual rounds to monitor activity off the planet. Not much else to do for the day, so after breakfast, we can deal with the corrupted gems and then make the rounds later on." Garnet answered.

"Well, you four have fun." Lapis said.

"You mean 'you three.'"

"Wow, so I'm restricted from yet another mission." I groan.

"It's for your own safety, Steven. Trust us." Pearl told me.

At least I don't have to do any boring shit. Yeah, I'll miss out on some neat gem fighting, but hopefully, I'll get to skip doing rounds.

"Fine. I'll stay."

"Please take me with you." Peridot generally spoke.

"You want to...follow along?" Amethyst asked.

Lapis grabbed Peridot by the neck and told Amethyst "No, she doesn't. She wants to sit her tight, green ass right here."

"Now, Lapis, maybe you should let her go." Pearl suggested.

"Yeah? Well, maybe you should take your right triangle ass nose and poke it into other people's business, Big Bird."

"Pearl..." Garnet sighed.

"It's just a suggestion, Lapis."

"Suggest your ass to the nearest birdhouse, Tweety. I'll handle my own business, thank you."

"Pearl, Amethyst. Get ready to head for the kindergarten in 5 minutes. We don't want them relocating elsewhere." Garnet said.

Garnet walked into her room, rather quickly.

"You heard the boss. Please fly away, now." Lapis told Pearl.

Pearl sighed and stood adjacent of the kitchen. Amethyst chuckled to herself as Lapis went back to her pancakes. Hilarious shit as always.

After the gems departed, Lapis leaned Peridot's head unto her shoulder. She poked a piece of her pancake and held it to Peridot's mouth.

"Open up." Lapis commanded softly.

Peridot opened her mouth ever so softly as Lapis carefully slid the fork into Peridot's mouth. Peridot smacked on the piece of pancake once Lapis pulled the fork out. Lapis rubbed Peridot's head, giving it a kiss. Peridot opened her mouth again, waiting for another forkful of pancake.

Lapis stabbed another piece of pancake and held it up. She, however, kept it from Peridot's mouth.

"You'll be good today, won't you Peri?" Lapis asked.

Peridot nodded with her mouth open. Lapis gave Peridot the piece of pancake.

"You'd better be."

Peridot winced slightly on Lapis's shoulder.

"Lapis.."

"You're not off the hook, so no talking." Lapis interrupted.

"Lapis, please."

"What did I just fucking say, Peridot?"

"Why does it have to be like this?"

"You know why. Now eat."

"Lapis, just-"

Lapis grabbed one of her pancakes and shoved it into Peridot's mouth whole. Peridot gagged for a moment, instinctively putting her hands on Lapis's arm.

"I said eat! Don't anger me, Peridot! Not this early!"

Peridot relaxed and nodded. Lapis held the pancake while Peridot slowly consumed it. Lapis looked over to me.

"Sorry you had to see that, Steven. Peridot just likes to get a little wild here and there. It's a good thing I'm here to 'straighten' her out, isn't it, Peridot?" She told me.

Peridot just shook her head, slowly this time. Peridot's eyes started to water right before she looked down.

"Ya see? Just a little discipline goes a long way."

"Yeah, sure. A little does." I said.

"What? Are you implying that I'm going overboard?" She asked.

"Hey, you know me. I don't really give a fuck, but just try not to kill her before lunch."

"Kill her? I'd never. I love her, Steven. So much."

"Yeah, ok, Chris Brown." I said, taking my last fluffy bite of heaven.

"She's rough around the edges. I'm just making them smoother. It's all in the name of love."

"Doesn't feel very loving." Peridot said.

Lapis slams her hand on the table.

"Keep talking and I'll give you something to feel!" She exclaimed.

Peridot flinches as she sinks down into her seat.

"You know what? I think Steven here needs to see just what I'm talking about." Lapis calmly said.

Lapis swiped the plates and cups off the table and jerks Peridot up onto it.

I throw my hands into the air and said, "Geez, thanks. I didn't want my bacon or juice anyways."

Lapis yanks down Peridot's pants to the point where they bunch up at her knees and held her down with an arm.

"Ah! Lapis!" Peridot exclaims.

"Woah, getting a little PG-13, aren't we?" I sarcastically asked.

Lapis licks her hand and spanks Peridot's ass, recieving a yelp from her.

"Oh ho ho, we're past PG-13, Steven. Time to smoothen these rough edges." Lapis chuckled.

Lapis repeatedly spanked Peridot, making her green ass jiggle in fear.

"Yeah, see, this is what I was 'implying.' This is some hard love if I've ever seen it."

"It's just discipline. Someone around here needs to teach her the fundamentals and I'll be more than happy to do it."

Peridot squeals in pain as Lapis goes to town on her.

"Whatever, Lapis. I'm going out."

As I open the door, Peridot calls out to me.

"Steven, no!" She said.

Lapis clasped Peridot's mouth shut and said, "Have fun. We'll be just fine here."

I shake my head and shut the door. I had enough of the "lovers' quarrel." I walked down the stairs, jumping over the railing next to the last few steps. I started to move to the inner parts of Beach City. I could go for some donuts. Right after breakfast. America.

~Oh, don't go blaming an entire country for something like this, Steven.~

"Yeah yeah, whatever, Rose."

~'Mom.' I am your mother. Not your sister, not your brother, not your friend. Your mother.~

Oh, did I forget to tell you that my 'mother' coexists alongside me? Apparently, when I was 'born,' she never left my conscience. It's annoying to have her in my head at times, since she can hear all my thoughts, see all my actions, yet never understand my feelings.

~Trust me, Steven. I wish I could said I didn't understand. It'd be easier than accepting the reality of your sanity.~

As you can tell, she's shedded a few layers since the gems have last seen her. Even professionals actor have to stop acting at some point.

~I'm sorry I'm telling you what you need to hear. Sugarcoating has an opposing effect on you. I suppose the hard truth is all you care about anymore.~

After reaching the Big Donut, to my dismay, I was faced with a closed sign.

~Rejoice, Steven. You found another of your beloved hard truths.~

"I don't need your shit right now. Can you just go back to ignoring everything again?"

~I never ignored anything over the past 14 or so years, Steven. I've just chosen not to comment on most.~

"You keep telling yourself that."

~I am.~

"Ha, ha. Crack another joke, why don't you."

~None of this should be taken as a laughing manner. In fact, the way you treat those two's relationship is horridly despicable. How dare you stand idle when that Lapis is abusing that poor Peridot.~

"That's their relationship. I'm not getting dragged into their shit. They'll sort it out one day."

~And if they don't?~

"Then it's still not my problem."

~You're going to sit there and let Lapis abuse Peridot just because you don't want to lift a finger to help?~

"Hey, don't act like I'm the only one that's doing it!"

~You were supposed to lead them, Steven. Ultimately, you were supposed to fix them.~

"I guess the next time you feel like vanishing out of fucking nowhere, you'll consider who you leave to who."

~Just...Just go back. Make sure Peridot isn't shattered.~

"Meh...fine, but only cuz we live in the shittiest, most boring city within 200 miles...Well, barring the usual Crystal Gem work."

I turned back around and started to make my way back home.

"Stupid pointless trip. Couldn't even get some damn donuts. Now I gotta play marriage counselor for two fucking-"

~You had better not finish that sentence, Steven.~

"Oh, just go back to ignoring me."

It wasn't long till I reached the house. Looked intact, same as always. No screaming. No distressing noises. Maybe they worked things out like I said, Rose.

~Go into the house. Make sure everything's ok.~

I ascended the stairs and lightly kicked the door open.

"Yo, Lapis, Peridot. Still alive?" I said, scanning the living room.

It wasn't until moments after I barely heard the two from my room.

"What do they think they're doing in my room?"

~Steven, on second thought, maybe we can go somewhere else.~

"Ohhh nah, nah, not this time! We're gonna go make sure they're ok, just like you requested of me."

~No! Stop! Let's just go back! Get your hand off the doorknob!~

With an extended pinky, I gently twist the knob and kicked the door in.

"What in the sensual hell are y'all doing in my bed?!" I yelled, hands cupped around my grinning mouth.

And, lo and behold, there they were; coiled in a very revealing position, Peridot laid over Lapis, out of breath. Peridot's plump, green ass connecting with Lapis's soft, blue pussy, mixing and mashing their juices. A hand on each of their breasts, lips still curled, hickeys swelling on their-

~For my sake, Steven, please stop describing it! You're only 15!~

"S-Steven?!" Peridot yelps, diving under the covers.

"You're back pretty early. Do you mind? We're in the middle of something." Lapis said.

"In the middle of som- Bitch, first of all, you're in MY BED fornicating. Fuck's wrong with you two? Take your makeup sex back to the barn, hicks." I retort.

"Hey, your room was the closest. Don't hold it against us." Lapis snickered.

"Oh, so this is funny to you? Sick motherfuckers..."

"Steven, we're-"

"Nope." Lapis said.

"Steven, I'm sorry. We weren't supposed to be here." Peridot apologized.

"No duh, Slutidot. Can y'all just..ugh..just go?" I sighed.

"No need to be jealous, Steven." Lapis said, grabbing her clothes and strolling past me.

"Hurry up, you freak." I pushed Lapis out my room while she giggled.

I turned to Peridot. She still had herself wrapped in my covers.

"And where in gem fuck is your clothes?"

"Y-You see..uh..well..funny thing about the clothes I..I had on at the time. See they were, like..uh...different from my..normal clothes. They looked the same, of course but they were like-"

"Peri, I swear to god if you tell me that your fucking clothes were edible and Lapis ate through them, saying that breakfast was more of a snack and she wanted a full meal, I'm gonna backhand the visors off your fucking face."

"..."

"..."

"...Well, now you're giving nothing else to say."

"Get out, bitch!"

"Geez." Peridot said, walking out of MY ROOM with MY COVERS.

~Steven, please never listen to what I say if it leads to this.~

"I'll do you one better and stop listening to you altogether."